Bipolar DisorderLook over your shoulder. They're watching you.
Tighten your stomach muscles.
Bounce your leg up and down.
"Are you okay?"
Don't say anything.
Feel it, feel the thoughts melting from your mind.
"What are you doing?"
They're behind you.
Kill them before they kill you.
Please save me.
Crazy. You're crazy.
No one wants you.
Pull the trigger.
"Please tell me what's wrong."
You wouldn't understand.
"Who are you? I don't know you anymore."
I'm a nobody.
I am Bipolar Disorder.
... "I don't know."
DDs: To select or not to selectHey wazaaaaaap!DDs: To select or not to select2 years ago in Art Features More Like This
In my last journal I talked about my stance on Daily Deviations. In this occasion I'll tell you some of the reasons that make me choose some artworks, and the reasons that make me not choose others. Hopefully it will be interesting for some, useful for others or simply a good reading if you're really boring.
What makes me choose a deviation to be featured?
Such a simple question with such an indefinite answer, and I apologize in advance for giving such a vague response but I'll put it simple: Sometimes not even I know!
There's not a secret formula I have to determine if a piece is going to be featured or not, sometimes I really have a hard time making a decision and it really is a case-by-case situation. The deviation needs to STAND OUT, be different, have that "wow" factor. Unfortunately this is very difficult to explain. However ther
My existence...Well I guess it's time for me to rant about my failures in life. Sounds like a good thing to do. I'm going to number my failures in the past 24 hours to help you realize how dumb i truly am. Enjoy, oh glorious watchers of mine.My existence...3 months ago in Personal More Like This
1) I woke up this morning and saw my shadow on the wall. Naturally, I panic. Naturally, I have a muscle spasm because i freaked out. So I punched myself in the face. Strike one for Mikki.
2) After this beautiful moment of my own abuse toward my face, I walk into the kitchen to get food. I find food, I eat food. I enjoyed the food. And suddenly A;JBG;KSDJGB;SKDJGBS. my fork scrapes the plate. One of the worst sounds, i'd say. So I started choking on my last bite of burrito. I survived, though. Wooooohoo.
3) i ran into a door. A closed, clearly visible door.
4) I nearly dropped my glasses in the toilet. I didn't, because of my SUPER FAST NINJA SKILLS OF DOOM THAT YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE AWESOMENESS OF, but i almost did. and that's bad enough.
5) i also fell asle
I did a thing!I told you guys I was going to do it, and I did.I did a thing!9 months ago in Personal More Like This
It's my graduation/Christmas present to myself.
My emotions are all over the place; I can't stop crying.
This means so much to me.
I suppose I'll write up a better explanation and story behind this later. I just feel like I'm floating right now.
Dear Poetry isn't just my username, it means too much to me to be only that. Poetry has honestly saved my life. Sometimes people ask me where I would be if I wasn't writing, and I tell them dead. There has been so much wrong in my life, and always kept it so hidden before someone told me to write it all down.
And last night, everything just seemed to click together. It was spur of the moment, and I walked into this tattoo parlor only seeking a price quote. The owner asked me how much I had on me, and personally did my tattoo for 25 dollars. I wanted to cry right then and there because he was being so nice to me. I think he could tell how much this simple tattoo meant to me. A
'Why Are We Even Talking About This?'I get that phrase a lot, that and "over react much?" whenever I bring up ANY issue, be it from a video game, politics, or whatever. There seems to be a lot of people who just don't wanna talk about anything at all, and would much rather these discussions just not exist so they can get on with their lives.'Why Are We Even Talking About This?'1 year ago in Personal More Like This
You'll be unsurprised to learn that I don't agree with that wisdom. In my books, if you don't do anything, nothing is going to happen. If there's an injustice in the world somewhere and you stay silent, that injustice isn't going to fix itself. It will just keep happening. That, my friends, is complacency.
Then of course there are those people who don't believe that the world will ever change, therefor there's no reason to try, and actively try to stop anyone who dares to stand up for something. I can't begin to describe how annoying that mindset is to me. It's almost sadistic in it's very nature, by actively trying to stop people from making the world a better place by being dismissi
WINNERS EVERYDAY! Points GIVEWAY!! Hey dahlin's!<3! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR DONATING AND SUPPORTING! I give all my points away anyways, and I love hosting giveaways <3 I am hoping to do more, and support Artists and to also make you smile Support what I am doing? Check out my page and lke if you'd like!WINNERS EVERYDAY! Points GIVEWAY!!2 years ago in Personal More Like This
to keep updated <3 gracias! Thanks for enterting if you are! <3 -hug-
I AM STILL SO INSPIRED TO GIVE AND MAKE THE MOST OF THE START OF A BRAND NEW YEAR! for 2013=
I said I still wanted to help people and keep motivating
so why not have A BUNCH OF WINNERS?
I know, sorry I only have 80 points, but they are perfect to help give away ! Someday I shall get more points, but I WILL keep giving <3
and you can win up to two times!~ /w/
HOW TO ENTER?
fave this journal and leave me a comment that you entered!
fave my NEWEST PEICE!
and Follow me on facebook if you can :iconpsychoflowerplz: http://facebook.com/happy143photos
Try to help sprea
Lacking Motivation? I hope this helps.Copied directly from the polycount thread:Lacking Motivation? I hope this helps.2 years ago in Personal More Like This
FYI My longest post on PC ever. Sorry in advance - OP I hope there's something useful in this for you. I'm back in your thread and giving you my morning before breakfast, is my way of saying ' I care '.
Usually between 1 - 5 NEW students, per day come to me for random pieces of advice. Some from here @ PC , some from Deviant Art - Mostly from Deviant art.
It's always the same questions maybe worded slightly differently and I do my best to answer every single time, every single message. Sometimes I get behind and have to catch up at the end of the week but I do my best.
As well as those, I did 2 10+ question interviews last week, on my time, for students who were still in school. For school essays, papers, projects etc that contain the same questions they always do.
I'm exposed to 'all this' *makes a big circle shape with hands* on a fairly constant basis. Everything that encompasses 'young artists trying to find their way in this scary fucking
The next step.Improving is about not giving up.The next step.2 years ago in Personal More Like This
I feel that art is overwhelming, its something so immense, so abstract, so godly that getting remotely close to actually mastering any of its endless nuances feels unobtainable.
At a certain degree it is, but what i have been noticing for the past ...humm... almost two years now... is that, the only way you can climb the next step in this endless staircase is not to give up while you are about to fall from the step you are into.
You are drawing something, and it feels wrong, it feels bad, and you erase it, you draw it again, and it looks even worse and you twist it, bend it, erase it, do it again, then its really horrible, and lastly you say: screw this, i give up, its over, no point because i cant do it.
And you give up on the entire piece, and all the effort, all the struggle, the horror was in vain, went down the drain.
When you are about to do this, don't.
Make it work, whatever it takes, eventually you WILL make it work! And then, oh, it feels gre
to all the people who have ever considered suicideThere is always a reason to keep fighting. I do not care how pitiful your life is, how seemingly insignificant, how painfulyou do matter. You matter to someone: perhaps it's your mother, your father, your friend. Perhaps it's someone you haven't even met yet, but that's part of the adventure, isn't it? There is always something more to come. Every human life is so incredibly and insurmountably precious. And I will not sit here and tell you that there are people who have it worse than you, because that's silly and useless. In your world, you feel alone and desperate and you feel as if nothing, nothing could ever make you feel happy or even functional again, and that is your world. You feel as if your life, your universe, everything you ever thought about yourself and the people around you is crumbling and crashing down. But I can guarantee that it will get better. I promise you. I promise.to all the people who have ever considered suicide2 years ago in Personal More Like This
You are brave and you are clever and you are wonderful, and you cannot let someone as specia
Depression"It's not real" -- It sure as heck feels real. So real it IS my reality on a daily basis.Depression2 years ago in Personal More Like This
"It's just an excuse to get out of doing things that other people have to" -- I'd love to do thing other people are doing, and I'd relish in being happy when I do so.
"You're just a little sad, you'll get over it" -- Depression isn't just 'feeling sad sometimes'... it's feeling sad ALL the time for what seems like no reason at all.
"Just grow up! Everyone is depressed, you just have to deal with it like everyone else!" -- Stop using everyone else to justify your insensitivity to other people's conditions (also, most of the people suffering from depression are adults, you don't get much more 'grown up' than adult).
"You're not suffering from anything, you're just lazy, ungrateful, and being silly" -- Ok, because obviously I LOVE feeling miserable, worthless, and stupid all the time...who wouldn't...?
"Stop using that as an excuse to not do anything." -- If I could manage to do something a
4,000+ Chibi Raffle! (CLOSED)UPDATE 2: Congrats to the winners:4,000+ Chibi Raffle! (CLOSED)4 months ago in Personal More Like This
1st place: :iconpastelunicorn-x:
Runner ups: :iconbladedcrow: :iconyumoe:
UPDATE: Just a reminder for those who might have missed the journal or new watchers that didn't see it. This is the last day to join the raffle, I'll be drawing names tonight! Good luck everyone! ♥
Hey guys, am hosting a raffle to celebrate getting 4,000+ watchers! You're all awesome and I want to give a chance to some lucky peeps to win a painted or sketched chibi by me!
I will be giving away:
+ 1st Prize will get 1 fully painted chibi, your choice.
+ 2 runner ups will receive flat colour sketch chibis of their choice.
You just have to fav this journal in order to enter, this is also for watchers only! Any advertisement is loved if you feel like it.
Raffle will end: Saturday, June 7th at 10:00pm PST
After that I will draw the winners with a random number generator and no
FANGIRLING. HARD.OH MY GOSH YOU GUYS. IT CAME. IT CAME EARLY. I'M FANGIRLING SO HARD RIGHT NOW.FANGIRLING. HARD.2 years ago in Personal More Like This
What, you ask?
My "Art of Rise of the Guardians" book!!!! IT CAME A DAY EARLY. AWESOME SURPRISE. It has a foreword by Alec Baldwin, a preface by NONE OTHER THAN WILLIAM JOYCE HIMSELF, and is written by Ramin Zahen.
OHMYGOODNESS. IT'S AWESOME.
It had chapters on each of the characters and their lairs!! AND THERE'S AN ENTIRE. FRIGGIN. SECTION. ON. JACK.
Anyway, I'm writing Chapter 28 right now and should have it up! After that, I'm going to continue fangirling hard as I read through this entire 155-page book.
And then probably write some more. Because I'm going to be inspired.
I'll be sure to end up including some findings that this art book will provide in my writing so it stays accurate!
Thanks, and sorry about the spam.
SOMEONE PINCH ME, I MUST BE DREAMING.
Oh, and I'm going to go see the movie again for the seventh time tomorrow. Fangirli
Eeveelution quiz! :O~~Eevee ~~Eeveelution quiz! :O2 years ago in Personal More Like This
[x] - You are childish
[x] - You are playful in some way
[ ] - You can't lie
[x] - You have an innocent appearance
[ ] - People say you look cute/nice
[x] - You can easily be amazed
[x] - You like hugging people
[x]- You are naive
[x] - Have a lot of stuffed animals
[ ] - You fear the darkness
[x] - You have been shocked before by an electrical current
[ ] - You are athletic
[ ] - You are very good in running
[ ] - You are mischievous
[ ] - You like playing pranks on people
[x] - You usually overdo what is required
[x] - You are good with technology
[x] - You like working out at the gym ( I find it fun for some reason )
[ ] - You love rock and/or rap
[ ] - You can speak very fast
[ ] - You enjoy or are good at swimming
[x] - You have a calm personality
[x] - You like to relax
[ ] - You like swimming deep underwater
[ ] - You can sense when rain is coming
[ ] - You like rainy days
[x] - You care about others
[x] - You are sensiti
100 Reasons To Live Know that someone, somewhere, cares about you.100 Reasons To Live1 year ago in Personal More Like This
You were made for a REASON. everyone has their own purpose in life.
Knowing that no matter how big your problems may seem, it's nothing compared to the endless galaxies and space that surrounds us all with the unknown, or better worded, the undiscovered.
To uncover all the possibilities and mysteries in life.To prove to everyone else who once downed you that you have potential and strength to become your best.To remind yourself of all the good memories and early childhood, and look forward to giving your own kids one day that same opportunity. To find someone, or something, that means so much to you that the world doesn't exist when you are in the warmth of their comfort and consoling, and if you don't have someone/something who provides this for you then being able to become this for someone else who needs the love.Being able to get lost in a good book.Becoming a idol or inspiration to someone out there.Watching mov
All AloneIt hurts, after a while. At first, you can brush it off, go about your life with no thought. But it starts to creep up, crushing your resolve the one moment you let your guard down, and take it for granted. Then you begin to hate it, but more often than not, there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.All Alone1 year ago in Personal More Like This
One man had two adorable little boys, and he cared for them so much, even though they were not his own. But that love became too much, and they left him, alone and broken, without a backward glance. Now he is all alone, ridiculed and shunned, left to sit alone every night, trying to figure what he had done wrong.
Another man had many people live under his house, and though he never treated them the best, they still respected him. But soon they all left, and he could do nothing about it. Who was once a great man, powerful with many people under his control, now is alone in his grand house, to
What a kiss means..---Always find this "pass along" adorbz---What a kiss means..2 years ago in Personal More Like This
Kiss on the stomach = "I'm ready."
Kiss on the Forehead = "I hope we're together forever."
Kiss on the Ear = "You're my everything."
Kiss on the Cheek = "We're friends."
Kiss on the Hand = "I adore you."
Kiss on the Neck = "we belong together."
Kiss on the Shoulder = "I want you."
Kiss on the Lips = "I love you."
What the gesture means...
Holding Hands = "We definitely love each other."
Slap on the Butt = "That's mine."
Holding on tight = "I don't want to let go."
Looking into each other's Eyes = "I just plain love you."
Playing with Hair = "Tell me you love me."
Arms around the Waist = "I love you too much to let go."
Laughing while Kissing = "I am completely comfortable with you."
picking someone up off their feet = "That they love them fully and would do anything for them."
Don't ask for a kiss, take one
If you were thinking about someone while reading this,
you're definitely in Love.
Post this again after readin
Writing Tournament 2013 ~ Round ICome one and come all, raise your pen take part in this grand literary battle! There are subscriptions, points, and more to be won! You all have until February 19th to enter.Writing Tournament 2013 ~ Round I2 years ago in Personal More Like This
The time is nigh for the Third Annual Writers--club Literature Tournament!
This is a tournament for all writers welcoming prose and poetry! It will be a grand competition spanning three rounds of literary challenge! First of all, you must be willing to write for each of the rounds over the coming months.
There will be judging at the end of each round and those who progress to the next round will have to write a new piece for the next round's theme. A new participants list with the surviving writers will be released upon the announcement of the new round.
To sign up, join the group as a member and add this blog entry to your favorites. From there, feel free to submit your entry to the Tournament Round 1 Folder.
Round I Theme: Immin
Hey y'alllll :)I am stronger than my emotional and physical scars.Hey y'alllll :)1 year ago in Personal More Like This
I am stronger than my past.
I am stronger than my disorder.
I am stronger than my depression.
I am stronger than my anxiety.
And I am stronger than their judgments.
So are you.
Don't give up.
153rd Day on DA (Promoting You and Your Arts)I am going to do something that will help you out one way or another and as spoken before in my previous journal entry , it will be a win win for all of us. I dont wana sound like a typical salesman selling you snakeoil and giving out promises that I cannot deliver.153rd Day on DA (Promoting You and Your Arts)4 months ago in Personal More Like This
Yes it will be a points for feature but what is SO DIFFERENT from the other features that people are offering. I have been studying it for sometime and its like you pay them and they will just put your avatar on their donation section and it says (watch them , check them out) THATS IT ?! And personally I have checked out with one of my friends here , the end result , it doesnt really brings traffic to their pages at all as their profile is already mixed and mashed with many others on that miserable donation section .
What I will do is , I will need to talk to you regarding many things . Like how you started arts , how you get on to DA , whats your style/personality and whats your goal etc. Many many things
Staying Strong...Not the easiest thing in the world. -.-Staying Strong...10 months ago in Personal More Like This
I basically wanted to make this journal to let you guys know... That I have horrible days too. We're all in this together... Keeping each other optimistic, keeping each other strong.
And I promise to be there for you guys (And I hope you guys are there for me too!) even through the hardest of all times.
I want you guys to know that YOU HAVE PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU, and pssst!! ... i'm one of them
I hope you guys are staying beautiful and wonderful <3 and hey, you're amazing, remember that.
So yeah. I'm not having the best day... But I hope you are having the best day ever
BE QUIET!!!!!So uh... yeah this got out of hand pretty quickly:BE QUIET!!!!!1 year ago in Personal More Like This
I'll be honest. I wasn't expecting the backlash to be so violent. But I guess I should expect this sort of thing whenever it comes to video games. At any rate, a lot of stuff is being thrown around haphazardly and I wanted to address some of the main complaints/defenses about my criticism of Quiet's design.
"She's got camo skin! She's dressed this way for a reason!"
You know, you can come up with any number of reasons for a character to be scantly clad. But at the end of the day it's still a scantly clad conventionally attractive female character. Not to put to fine a point on it but having Mystique walk around naked because her skin changes color doesn't stop her from being a source of obvious pandering T&A. So I'm sorry, but that whole "you'll be ashamed for slut-shaming her" excuse doesn't hold water with me, especially after Kojima outright said that her design was to sell
Think Suicide is the Answer?I understand if nobody believes in ghosts, but I still feel like I should post this. Even if nobody believes it, I still want people to know.Think Suicide is the Answer?1 year ago in Personal More Like This
In 1999, there was a girl at my school named Annabelle. She was a Junior, and let me tell you, she was a very pretty girl; pale skin, a few freckles, long brown hair, and blue eyes. She was rich and fit into a crowd, and had lots of friends. Sounds like the best life ever, right?
The thing nobody knew was that she was only popular to avoid bullies and peer pressure, which on occasion, she still had to deal with. People took advantage of her for her money and guys only liked her because of her appearance. She hated everything about it; she hated knowing she couldn't be herself because nobody would love her, she hated makeup, the clothes; everything. On top of that, she was Agnostic and her best friend was Wiccan; she would've been bullied for being accused of being Satanic.
That's not even half of it, though; her father, Bryce, was a
Random/Unsorted:iconblockjuice: :iconerrorepicfailplz: :icondeliciousplz: :icondalekfunplz: :icondudewtfplz: :icondimwattplz: :iconnobuteeheeplz: :iconeggsplz: :iconballsackplz: :icontheresyourproblemplz: :iconmegaphoneohnoesplz: :iconarbysplz: :iconyeahplz: :iconohyeahplz: :iconcryforeverplz: :iconeepplz: :iconepicwinplz: :iconwrongplz: :iconmahboiplz: :iconronaldmcdonaldplz: :iconexcusemeprincessplz: :iconnostalgiacriticplz: :iconcobraplz: :iconfreeinternetplz: :iconcoolstorybroplz: :iconrivetingtalechapplz: :iconcoolstorybrowplz: :iconkermityayplz: :iconthankyouplz: :icontimmysdadplz: :icon12plz: :iconmiguelplz: :icon1984plz::iconohnoesohplz::iconlolyesplz::iconhellnoplz::iconhellyeahplz::iconinamericaplz::iconnotplz::iconohgodwhyplz::iconachmedplz::iconwalterplz: :iconhorrorllamaplz: :icontakethatplz: :iconpickleplz::iconninjastealplz: :iconsquedplz: :icon2dfffplz: :iconcrusadeplz: :iconbakeaprettycakeplz: :iconohmygodplz: :iconwrongplz: :iconepicboogieplz: :iconyeahplz: :iconwutplz: :Random/Unsorted4 years ago in Personal More Like This
Warm Bodies ...Warm Bodies ...2 years ago in Personal More Like This
Watch it. Seriously.
I just got back from the cinemas, where I caught Warm Bodies with my bestie from LASALLE. I know what you're thinking, that the movie didn't look that great. Yet another zombie movie amongst the throngs of supernatural the media flings at us, yet another teenage romance to appeal to every young adult with a pulse. And I will be the first to admit that when I first heard the outline of the story - a cute young man who just happens to be undead falls in love with a young girl at first sight - I was skeptical. I assumed it would become a rehash of Twilight, and I just got over the nausea of seeing those posters cluttering all the billboards.
However, after trawling through the trailers and finding them appealing and funny, I decided that the movie was worth a shot. It advertises itself as a quirky, humorous take on zombies, throwing in a mix of teenage romance
Emoticon by Me (Nichijou)Okay, I'm just seperate it....Emoticon by Me (Nichijou)2 years ago in Personal More Like This
Hope you enjoyed it....
Nichijou © Arawi Keiichi
Aioi Yuuko Emoticon
Shocked ver.1 :iconyuukoshockniplz:
Shocked ver.2 :iconyukkoshockedniplz:
Feel sad??? :iconyukkosobniplz:
There are makes you happy??? :iconyuukoblingniplz:
Ano... ummm... :iconyukkoshyniplz:
Let's go on!! Keep your spirit!!! :iconyukkoganbatteniplz:
AHA!!! Idea!!! :iconyukkoideaniplz:
Evil Smile... :iconyukkoevilsmileniplz:
GOD IS DEAD!!! :iconyukkogodisdeadniplz:
Very sad.... :iconyukkoverysadmadniplz:
Too sad... :iconyukkotoosadmadniplz:
I'm not stupid!!! :iconyuk