SmilesA smileSmiles4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A small thing to express joy
At least that's what it was intended to be
But smiles have evolved
They are no longer expressions
They are tools.
Tools to hide pain and heart ache
Tools to fool people
Tools to fool yourself
Tools to show people you are fine.
We've distorted the lines so much,
Most can't truly smile.
And I am the worst offender
It's what I was taught.
It's how I was raised.
Never let them see,
Hide behind a smile.
I can laugh for days without a reason
Because that was what I had to do
That was what I was taught.
People hardly notice
The words disgust me.
It is no longer a smile
No longer MY smile
I wonder sometimes
If I ever even had one
I know I must have
It's not something you falsify at first
But I can't remember
To fool people
To fool ourselves
To show we're okay
When we are anything but.
Wish For A Better LifeYou talk for hoursWish For A Better Life4 years ago in Concrete Poetry More Like This
About pointless droll
About someone's new boyfriend
And that new shopping mall
You think about books
You hold them with pride
You think about characters
Wishing you had their lives.
You listen to music
To drown out the sorrow
You sit there and wish
For a better tomorrow
You love to travel
But never find what you need
Not a place in the world
You feel you'd succeed
You'll never have roots
And you'll never know why
Until you finally know
You would never have a tie
You were hurt when you were young
You were hurt then real bad
And you don't know what's wrong
Don't know why you're mad
So you just keep moving
To place after palace
Keeping an arm's length
Between anyone's base
You don't think you want home
You don't think you want fame
You just want to be left
Left out in the rain
Look (Right Through Me)Allegory rules the world,Look (Right Through Me)4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Angry, lonely, little girl.
Begging for life by praying for death,
Understanding love but hating breath.
Black lies in spider silk,
Smothering all the voices.
Screaming truth by spreading the lies,
Hearing them all but ignoring the cries.
Heartbreak and heartbeats,
Drowning out broken hearts.
Beating hate by feigning glorified love,
Confined by life but free as a dead dove.
Crimson hopes flooding out,
Killing the pessimist's child.
Singing silence by bleeding it away,
Losing religion but aching to pray.
Killer fame striking hot,
Taming the soul I loved.
Playing the game by sitting it out,
Knowing it all but nothing about.
Sharp amethysts stab deep,
Reminding me of my you.
Showing me care by letting me die,
Listening long but not hearing me cry.
Headphone hospice healing hearts,
Death started by life's poison darts.
Hell's hearse harking hollow hate,
Taking me away from this berate.
He held hearts, he hurt her head,
He's him and I'm her; both better off dead.
HeavyMy chest is heavy,Heavy4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
As if something huge,
Something as big as the universe,
Is resting on it.
I can barely breathe;
It weighs too much.
I can see my heartbeat
Through my skin.
The worst part is
I don't know why this is happening.
And that means
I don't know how to fix it.
The Broken WallMilo woke up one morning in a different bed than the one he had gone to sleep in. Even so, the bed he was in now was still his own. He looked up at the ceiling and saw patterns there that he had never seen before and yet he knew they would be there. Sunlight slanted through the window in a line different from what he had expected.The Broken Wall5 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
He spent the rest of the late morning wandering through the house. It was full of knick-knacks from places he was sure he had been. Every thing that he found there was his. Every thing that he found there was new to him.
In a daze, he sat down at the kitchen table. His mind was running, but it was buzzing, too. He couldn't keep his thoughts straight or even pick them out of the eternal hum. It was as if his mind was deliberately keeping him from thinking too much.
Outside he found a garden, full of plants he loved. Down a path he found a bench around a huge oak tree. He suddenly had a vague memory of having planted it, but that could not be possible. He sat d
A SmileI'm waiting terrified for the last decision,A Smile4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You gently touch the knife,
My heart is pounding, waiting for the lethal incision,
I almost see the blade shedding the liquid of life,
I hear myself choking with my own blood,
The sound of the knife rending my flesh - a deafening thud.
But your hand goes further; over the axe it leans,
Shining ruthless under your fingers,
I'm about to die, by all means,
A sick suspense lingers,
I almost hear the sound of my breaking bones,
The gushing blood, the moans,
But no; your hand, well, further it goes.
"A gun? "
With it easily it will be done,
Infix the cold metal and let me bleed to death,
"Will it be fun? "
Just imagine the blood outflow until the last breath,
"Or a hammer? "
My body you could simply mash,
But you'll need to endure the blood splash,
That will stain your hands and face.
But instead that, your fingers, they retrace.
"The most lethal weapon isn't any of these",
You say stepping back, as my heart is starting to appease,
"It would be to
The Hawke's WolfHawke had been out ridding the Bone Pit of more Drakes and Giant Spiders and she was exhausted. 'Ugh,' she thought, 'I smell horrible! I have to take a shower when I get home.' As she entered the Docks she decided now would be the perfect time for a late night swim. She swam for near an hour not a care in the world. Now she was ready to go home. 'At least the smell is gone,' she reflected crossing the threshold of Hightown market. It was night time so all the shops were closed. Without the nobles around she could enjoy the tranquility of the night. Anders would kill her if he knew she was using the word tranquil as a positive thing. On the other hand it might make Fenris happier. 'Hmmm who to choose, who to choose?' She laughed at her own question just as she reached her door. 'Like either one of them wants anything to do with me.' She was going to turn in early today but when she stepped into the foyer the scent of roses overcame her. 'What's this,' she wondered. She followed aThe Hawke's Wolf4 years ago in Romance More Like This
Dragon Age Origins: Alistair vs Teagan Back at Redcliffe. It seems I've come full circle. We've agreed to stay and help with the monster problem coming from the castle, and Angel is talking to Teagan about the upcoming battle's strategy while I mostly space out. There's a reason I'm not the leader. Teagan is commenting on how he knew Angel's father, Angel is saying how he spoke highly of Teagan, and then I hear this,Dragon Age Origins: Alistair vs Teagan2 years ago in Romance More Like This
"I am still unwed. Though I'd be lucky to find a woman as lovely as you." My gaze snaps to Teagan to find him tracing her curves with his eyes. Hey! Stop looking at those curves! Those are my curves! Okay, so technically they're not, but I fully plan on them being. Eventually. Damn it, I saw her first! I call dibs!
"Flatterer," Angel responds charmingly. Charmingly! I stop smiling and give Teagan my best death stare. He doesn't notice; he hasn't stopped looking at her.
"If I may be so bold, what of you, my lady? Are you married?" I'm no longer feeling very
Poets should never make ghost children.I whisper cheap metaphorsPoets should never make ghost children.4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
into your needy ears until, like
funeral flowers, they rest upon
the atlas of your mind. You
with your napkin love letters
and cloudy storm eyes
are the only one to ever
make my scaled spine quiver.
But, my veins ache
from consuming too much ink.
I am gagging on black blood
as it spills from your fingertips
to rest upon my lips.
You asked me once if I could read
the words carved into my limbs
like prophecies of you and I
we were written in the universe
of freckles dotting my thighs.
I tried to plot constellations
along this neurotic cadaver skin
and only managed to contradict you.
StopYour voiceStop4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Through my ears.
It makes me want to
Scream and say
My ears bleed
At the sound of your voice.
My head pounds,
I just want to be alone
With my own thoughts,
My own voice,
I don't want to listen anymore.
StainsI.Stains4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You burned the eggs and wrote scripture
in the shadows of a lunar eclipse.
I haven't slept for years, but it took the far away
scream of a siren to convince me that
the moon is a liar.
Body bags are filled with better men.
There are rivers of oil where I can't seem to break
The mirrors that flaunt your reflection.
You couldn't dare me to walk across that bridge.
You couldn't ask me to sit through a full sermon
and still remain humble.
I'll never be home before the street lights come on and
you'll never hold my hand in the day time.
We're both clinical fools.
"The only difference between poison and medicine is the dose "
Yet, our intentions were never good.
Lately I can only focus on how many days we have left
before ash blankets the entire sky.
Before my free will is no longer an issue.
I feel the most sympathy for the birds.
The ones who will fly across an ocean to find nothing on the other side.
Just a life boat buried in the sand.
You made those clou
Aching LoveYou exist onlyAching Love4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
within my throbbing skull;
that is all the love I need.
The Throbbing RoomI've lived my life here in this roomThe Throbbing Room4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
This room that is most moist and mushy
I don't mind; it's warm in here
My room is shaped oddly
Like a potato with tendrils twisting upwards
I feel safe here
There is this odd earthquake
The entire room throbs and rattles
I feel imprisoned
I have to get out; have to find a way
To get out, out of this room
I am locked away; only there is no door
I cry and pound on the throbbing walls
Screaming my throat hoarse
But there is no answer–just that dreadful throbbing
No one can hear me; I doubt
My yells echo throughout the emptied room
No ears or eyes just numb skin–and that terrible thumping
I felt my body go limp and
There on the mushy, pulsing floor I sobbed
Too deep in your chest to be noticed –inside a throbbing room
Stars In Her EyesStars in her eyesStars In Her Eyes3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Love at first sight
Stars in her eyes
Completely in love
With her Starry eyed boy
Her head up above
Stars in her eyes
As he asked her to dance
They glided around
Catching everyone's glance
Stars in her eyes
As her soft lips met his
Talked for hours
Then another short kiss.
Stars in her eyes
as he whispered in her ear
told her he loved her
and soothed her big fear
Stars in her eyes
For 5 more long years
Till he got down on his knee
And she broke into tears.
Stars in her eyes
A week till the date
Picking the dress
She really can't wait
Stars in her eyes
When her mother comes in
But her love won't come home
With his bed full of sin
Stars in her eyes
Empty, reflecting the sky
Her starry eyed boy
Told her lie after lie
Stars in her eyes
No longer there
Left a note in her place:
"The world isn't fair."
MondayLines are not neededMonday4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
but they were there
all the same.
Sunday broke the peace
leaving Monday uncertain
and I walked away.
Maybe happiness should be earned
or won in a game.
I feel I have been played.
I know you didn't mean for this,
your intentions honest,
you told me the truth.
The truth as always,
is a death sentence
and here we are at deaths doorstep.
Your mind scattered
when reality stepped in
we are too old for fairytales.
I fear the choice has been made
by neither you or I.
These are not our lives to lead,
But a hand or a stop sign
at a cross road,
you must decide.
All I can say is it will be ok,
I am not certain it is true,
but then I never liked the truth anyway.
Make Me RealI have told you.Make Me Real4 years ago in Letters More Like This
I have told you my fears, my dreams, my secrets. I've told you that some of these secrets will never come out, and that is true. They'll never escape me voluntarily, because they were never created in a way that would let them escape that way. But I need you, and I need you to understand me as much as I struggle to understand you, I need you to look at me and tell me that I'm a puzzle piece as well, I need you to convince me. I need you to be honest, but I also need you to lie.
Because lies are what I swallow best.
I have told you that I had a past, and a present, and a future. But I've never told you exactly how scrambled they are to me. I've never shown you exactly how hard it is for me to remember what's real, truly real. And the last thing that you don't know is that I'm scared that you're too good to be true. I'm scared to find out that you're just inside my head, like everything else is. I'm scared of the dark, and it's not because of what's under t
Lay your LoveLay your love over me; I wish you well.Lay your Love4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I am no more than bone now, the rats fed
on my ruined remains; you have no care, tell
them your sorrow has shown, kiss my new bed.
You have a heart, a heart that thrives on guilt.
Neglected my only sixteen years, who
are you? Surely, no man of worth. You built
relationships with your rogue-like charm to
deceive and con others into your fraud,
so good. You are going down now, friend. Chew
on your last deceitful words; I applaud
your valour. Laze across green, sip your brew.
I know where this is headed to, you cheat;
you are just going to sit back and beat.
breaking not bending.she learned of wishing the ocean away with all her might.breaking not bending.4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
of spending nights curled between cotton and wishing she had
the power to shrink it and bring him right here, right now.
the ocean wasn't beautiful to her it was dark and cruel and
entirely immovable. it sliced entire continents in half,
and to her it was just an over sized bully, tearing things
apart just because it can.
My Sweet SilenceLike paltry drops of morning dewMy Sweet Silence4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Our words are solemn and so few,
I fear the spring of our discourse
Shall soon decline from its source,
Perhaps this is an early farewell
To a friendship forged and lynched in hell,
Lets raise a toast to new friends hence
Here's to you, my sweet silence.
ItIt watches you, waiting,It4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Waiting for when you are all alone,
Then in unseen dream-like blinks
It grasps hold of you and
Pulls you down into the
Like the swirling mist over water,
You stay out of touch,
Just above the surface, of reality,
Just within the boundaries of time,
But you have no need for time,
It drips off you like rain.
(24th January 2012)
runOur feet hit the asphalt with a roar that echoes in the empty alley ways. My word of warning bounces off the bricks, "RUN!" The first bullet rings out and our feet slide on the gravel. My best friend grabs my hand and she pulls me up from the ground. I can feel her pulse racing as fear begins to fill our bodies. The second shot rings out and I feel a sharp pain in my leg. "Go on with out me!" She looks back at me with watery eyes before facing her route of escape. I try to get on my feet as the smoking gun approaches me. I tuck my feet closer to my body as his footsteps begin to get louder. A whimper escapes me as his eyes set on me. His yellow teeth show as his skin is pulled back into a bone chilling smile. He puts the gun to my head, "Where is your friend hiding?" I spit out the only phrase I can manage, "Go to hell."run4 years ago in Short Stories More Like This