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HimHim.Him4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I still love him. Even after all this time. All these months, I've been crying, trying to move on. I just wish we were still together. He still means the world to me; Everything. Well, almost everything.
I'm lying here, crying my eyes out, listening to our song. It's so true. I would die for him, even now. I would throw everything that I have away, just to be with him.
I would give up on everything, for him.
But, of course, he doesn't know that.
He doesn't want to know...
Why would he? I'm the one that let him go in the first place...
It really hurt me, when he went out with my best friend. For those 8 days, I cried myself to sle
IMeanItWhenISay... I mean itIMeanItWhenISay...4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I mean it when I tell you "iloveyou"
I mean it when I say you can't lovememore...
I mean it when I tell you that it would be impossible for that to be so
Because
I do love you
I love you; with all of your scars
I love you; with all your imperfections [because nobodys perfect]
I love you; with all of your sarcasm and your cute laugh
I love you; you make my day
I love you; You cheer me up when I feel crap
I love you
And I mean it when I say this
I love you more than I have ever loved anyone
I love you more than I ever thought I could
I haven't even met you
And yet..
You
[have changed me]
[have changed my life;
How Am I "Supposed" To Feel? How am I supposed to feel?!How Am I "Supposed" To Feel?4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
How.. am i supposed to feel..
How.. am i supposed to think anymore?
Tell me how to feel
Someone, please... tell me, Just tell me.
Someone, please... help me.
Cos I can’t do this by myself.
Can’t do this alone anymore.
Never thought the day would come when I'd need pills to sleep...
But that day has dawned,
And now I’m chewing away,
Determined to find the sand in my eyes that brings me peace,
Just for a few hours.
Peace.
It’s all I want,
I crave it,
I need it.
Just for a few hours, Please... just give me 2 or 3 or 4 hours...
It’s all I need... I just need to sur
Im sorry but I cantI can't do this anymoreIm sorry but I cant4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I can't look at her in the mirror
The other me
The one who plasters on a smile every morning, tells everyone she's okay, she can cope
The one whom I have believed for so long; Oh so very long now.
But.
No more.
No more pretence. No more lies.
It's time to do away with all of that, Now.
It's time to say goodbye to the pretence of my life; to that way of living
For nobody cares anymore
Nobody wants to be there, to pick me up when I fall. Nobody wants to be that person that has to cheer me up when I’ve had a crap day. Nobody wants to be there for me for when I need someone to listen
Nobody
Wants
Me
And
You broke meYou broke meYou broke me4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Into a billion little tiny shards
And left me there
You walked away
And carried on as if nothing had ever happened
As if nothing had ever changed
As if we hadn't ...
You carried on with your life. Not our life.
You carried on
Alone...
You broke me
You [made] me trust you
You [made] me smile, laugh
You're now [making me cry.]
All i can do now
Is lie here
Thinking of what we had
[What we have]
What we could have had
All i can do now
Is lie here and cry
Cry in desperation
For the love i have
Isn't reciprocal
All i can do
Is sit here and cry
Blub to myself
Over what we could have had
What we had
It was ne
when she was here, nothing was wrongshe used to tell me stories of howwhen she was here, nothing was wrong1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
the stars whispered their secrets to her and how lonely they were, but how happy
she always used to ask me if i thought anyone else could hear them
or if i thought everyone else was just too tied up in themselves to notice
she was too perceptive for her age
but that was why i loved her
the whispers she told me once, hushed tones herself
they all stopped when she found me
because, she explained with her hands and the lights of her eyes
i was the only one, the only girl
who knew her heart before she even said anything, had the key before she'd invented the lock
she told me that i must be the other o
history in the making"raise your glass, if you are wrong, in all the right ways"history in the making2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
oh yeah. i'm a mixture of words emotions objects.
i'm a cement mixture of a dictionary a squirrel - yes a squirrel - a kitten a water bottle an orange and a chair.
and you know what? i like it.
you know what word makes me smile? when he says "heya"
when you smile that secret smile, the one where nothings right but it doesnt matter because someone else is being more stupid than you?
yeah, i know that smile.
i know those words; 'always' 'forever' 'love'
they may mean nothing now, but who knows what they'll mean in, 2 years, 5 years, 10 years time?
i don't. i didn't know the na
BrokenLittle girl, lost... She's lost in all of this Confusion. She's Wandering, Shivering,Broken4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
In this manic world, That she has come to call
Home.
She can’t save herself. Crying, weeping desolately to herself, She flees the place that she loves. She leaves behind, broken, trodden.. She leaves the memories where they were made.
She leaves herself
She rids of self control: Rids of happiness; Rids of pleasure; Rids of friendship
Of Love; Of everything
She cannot go back; Not To All Of This, Not To Pretence
She can’t save herself this time.. She runs, she walks, she weeps. She flees the place that she loves. She leaves behind, broken,
fighting for youwe send each otherfighting for you2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
love hearts
over facebook
and we keep going
until one of us runs out
(it's usually
me;
i never have enough
to give)
we spend hours and hours on the phone
and don't even realise
(one phone-call can
run up a bill of
£40 and we
still haven't said all that we
wanted to)
we were pen-pals,
before we were best-friends;
even now
with computers and
where writing letters seems
old-fashioned
(neither of us
care for what's "in"
or "right" at the time;
where's the point
in others having rules,
if you can't show them
how flexible they are?)
guiltyshe pays for theguilty2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
(unheard cries and the)
presents, the pain which
she ignored
when it was happening
(not to me... not to me... not to me...)
she pays for the
long nights toying with
what-ifs, how-comes and all the
expensive perfume (which
can never seem to cover the clanging
stench of blood)
she never bothered with
whys
she pays for
the childrens school
(the doctors bills)
she pays for the childrens silence;
which
is usually more than she
can really afford
(remembering
the nosy questions she
deflected by cash-in-hand)
she recieves
rueful smiles
not of apology
(he's too big for that)
but of pity
('she can't get o
behind closed doorsBehind closed doors;behind closed doors2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
a little boy cries
behind closed doors;
a puppy dies
behind closed doors;
a 4year old girl plays with a knife
behind closed doors;
a man beats his wife
behind closed doors;
are where the truth is revealed
behind closed doors;
locked, padlocked, and sealed
behind closed doors;
are where the secrets and lies
behind closed doors;
are mingled in with the jollities of "happy families"
behind closed doors;
this is how the other half live
behind closed doors;
do you care enough to open them?
habits are harder to break than bones"i haven't run away for a while. i'd almost forgotten how nice the feeling is of punishing them for not caring, and walking back in to open arms and crying. it almost makes me want to run away, and never come back. almost.habits are harder to break than bones2 years ago in Emotional More Like This
but no coming back means no delicious 'yes-this-is-how-i-feel-constantly,-now-you-know' look to shove in their faces, no one-up on them, and, perhaps the most taunting of all, no recognition. so maybe i'm better just being a fly on the wall, rather than an active (willing?) hurting participant."
~~
"running is a force of habit. i stopped caring where i ran to, stopped remembering who i was running from or who i was runni
canvasi can'tcanvas2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
make art
anywhere near
as pretty as you.
i can't
destroy the will
of others
with a few words,
with your flair;
i can, however,
make my body
my arm, my leg,
become a masterpiece.
i can
collect blood
in sealed-glass bottles
just to look at
for those moments
just for those moments
when i need to
know
why i'm not alive
but not entirely
dead, either.
A Product of a Broken HomeA Product of a Broken Home3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Can
anyone save me?
i'm drowning
in these inward tears
it's
tearing me
apart
the smile
is back in place
but
it's crookedly painted
there..
by my own unstable hand
i need
someone
to get me OUT
before
before they see
before they realise
before they figure out
~
before they figure "me" out
before they know
before they realise
that the person they see,
that the person they recognise as "me"
is
hollow
'
before they look
deep into her
gray blue eyes
and see
see all the aunguish
that she so cleverly hides
from the world
see all the pain
see the cuts
see the shattered broken peices
/
someone save me
before
The waitThe wait.The wait4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Is neverending
The game
I'm not good at playing
The game
I don't want to play; don't want to choose, to have this loss yet again
I don't want to be her guardian
I don't want to choose... and choose wrongly
I don't want her to die but
I don't want the pain
I don't want my baby in pain
She has her whole life ahead of her
Her whole life
She's only little
Looks so fragile
So.. young..
So.. tired
They are in sync
They may not be related; but they are more like twins than some of the twins i actually know
He'd be broken
He'd cry even more; become so...
Distant? ...no... it's more than that...
He wouldn't have his pa
jigsawi am a jigsawjigsaw2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and you
you hold the
invisible peices
the ones
i've been chasing
searching for
for years.
you have the ones that made it work
and now
i have lost so many others
you might as well keep the ones you have
it's not like
i need to breathe
anyway
Rabbits Right Eye4 years ago in Weather and Sky
More Like This
GoneGone....Gone3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
the single word whispered over and over, tormenting her
Gone
she couldn't follow, no matter how much she wanted this
Gone
nothing she can do anymore
noone left to save.
none left to care...
She stumbles, falls.
'i HAVE to... i have to..'
more whispering to herself; noone else around to hear, anyway
all she knows is gone; all she loves, all she cared for
she finally reaches the clearing, finally there, finally..
the searching begins.
she won't - can't - give up.
has to find it
'i have to find her.. have to have to have to.. can't not... need her.. got to..'
her thinking distorts itself, nothing to do with whats goin
you don't ask and now i'll never knowin the end it was so easyyou don't ask and now i'll never know1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
too easy
so easy that the facade became the reality
and when the truth was finally discovered
it was twisted and mired in loss heartbreak and pain
still readable, legible, as her handwriting, just
it tells you about how the mask was just too easy to slip on and blend in with
the lies too sugarcoated to swallow, so much so she used to choke
the pills too easy to loose yourself to, too drownable in their fake smiles
but now she's here
she's with you, now
she don't trust you; you don't trust her
then she laughs, and it's the best sound you've heard in years, it's like a bell
and he doesn't want it to stop,
times like theseit's timestimes like these2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
like these
when my arm
is just so
itchy
and all i want to do
is cut into it
and watch the blood
run free
it's times like these
when i remember
you
and who
i used to be
(that tense you just can't escape from)
and who
you were
and what
it felt like.
~~
it's times like these
i think of all the
if-only's
and what-if's
i've saved
over the years
and i just
wanted to tell you:
i never
lost faith;
i'll always
love you;
(i never gave up on you
even when you gave up on the world.)
except
y'know
it don't matter so much
now.
cause
you see
it's now
now
and this time
here
it's just
too
late.
addictionyou're the first voice i hearaddiction9 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
(in my head) on a morning
telling me that i can do it
i can get out of bed
i can cope with life (and your death) today
you're the last voice
i want to hear before i sleep
but
you're (not) there
as hard as i search
i can't hear your voice
i can't hear what i need
and now
salty tears
are the only lullaby
i have
left
BecauseIDon'tKnowTheAnswersSnowBecauseIDon'tKnowTheAnswers3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Snow snow snow
Softly falling
Singing to the birds,
to the creatures upon the land
Singing the song of winter
Singing the song of the snowflake
Of the frost, of the ice, of the wonderful frozen bareness that the land would become beneath it's cover
~
Ice
Ice ice ice
smooth
shiny
deadly
crying out its harsh lullaby
screaming out its aunguish, as it is fallen upon; broken
made to fight back
forced to make them slip; make them fall + cry out
just as they were making the poor poor fallen ice do
~
Death
oh sweet sweet death
sweet sweet broken dreams, engulfing
overriding
flooding
making the world the black place it wo
todayTodaytoday2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Today is the day
everything changes.
Today is the day -
and everything changes.
Today is the day
everyone changes.
Today is the day
I change
Today is the day
All those years ago
how many? 6? 7? maybe even 8
I've lost count of the years;
Now, all i remember are the days
Today is the day
all those many years ago
You told me I would be somebody
To never give up
To always smile through my tears
That the sun would shine again tomorrow, and brighter because I was there to smile too
Today is the day
I prove you right
Today is the day
Home is no longer the house i grew up in
but the people who have made me who i am
Toda
Sta.sh
