Mental self-harmSelf-harm isn't always about harming yourself physically.
Very often it's also about mental harm, in some cases all about mental harm.
I for one have never ever cut myself, even though I've played with the thought.
But for many years I've harmed myself with my own mind.
Digging deep mental holes in which I tried to bury myself when I couldn't handle all the chaos going on.
A lot of times I've harmed myself by forcing myself to not make myself heard when what I really needed was someone to speak to.
Ignored friends when they tried to reach out and help me. And then coming back and begged for help just to repeat the same damn mistake over and over again.
I don't do shit like that very often anymore. But sometimes I just can't do any better than close every possible way into my heart and mind, and just shut everyone out. Even close friends that I care about. They who care about me.
In the long run, and most of the time in the short run too, it's nothing else but self destructive. Obviousl
I Used To BeI used to be so optimisticI Used To Be3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I used to pray and hope and love
But I closed my eyes and lost it
And now I live in lands of frost
Growing up killed all my dreams
It made me see the World
I used to laugh and love and breathe
But now I'm caught in life so cold
I used to be so sure of living
I used to smile to myself
Unaware of the World I lived in
And unaware of strength of wealth
I'll never be what I did dream
I'll never see the world I wanted
I can't afford to still believe
In dreams that only ended haunted
My voice?I tried to smile,My voice?3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
laugh through the pain,
but it's been a while,
I think I'm insane.
I can't hear my own voice.
The one that says what I want.
Now I have no choice.
You never did, it taunts.
It tells me what I should say.
It tells me who I am.
It tells me everyday.
Am I the lion or the lamb?
Am I as weak as I feel,
or as strong as I pretend?
Am I cold and hard as steel,
or just waiting for it to end?
Who am I?
Do I really want to know?
I end with a sigh.
The voice is telling me to go.
AwayI want to fly away,Away3 years ago in Concrete Poetry More Like This
up, in the sky.
down, back to earth.
I want to go.
Away, anywhere, nowhere, somewhere.
Leave, let go, live.
I want to fly away,
somewhere I can stay.
I'm Fine"Are you okay?"I'm Fine3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
No. I'm dying. I have to push myself to wake up in the morning, and when I finally do, I want to go back to sleep. Even my best dreams are becoming nightmares. I can't taste food, I can't stand the things I used to love. I'm breaking. I'm fading. I'm dying.
BullyShh.Bully3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Demons in the shadows
They'll find a way
To get you.
Beatings, swallowing you.
Scars, defining you.
You know you're weak.
You can't fight a bully
When the bully's inside of you.
I Am One Of Jehovah's WitnessesI am a thirteen year old girl.I Am One Of Jehovah's Witnesses3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I am a poet.
I am beautiful in my own way.
I am powerful.
I am unique.
I am special.
I am not crazy.
I am not worthless.
I am not brainwashed.
I am a human being.
I make mistakes. And I admit that.
I cause trouble, sometimes a lot of trouble.
I have a disorder that affects me day to day.
I don't think I'm perfect. In fact, I know I'm not.
I tolerate the ignorance.
I tolerate the pain.
I tolerate the hatred.
I tolerate the disgusted looks.
I accept the fact that I am different.
But can't you accept the fact that we're exactly the same?
Diaries of a boy named HateDiaries of a boy named Hate3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
They always say everyone wants love.
So how come they don't think that's not the case for me?
Why do they point their fingers at me?
Why do they walk away?
Look down at me?
Spit at me?
Why do they...
from your mirror.. with loveStand at mefrom your mirror.. with love3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Glare at me
Your hair at me.
your eyes like
daggers and spears.
I'm not cruel
Two Sides to Every StoryCan't believe you're not here. | Can't you see I'm still here?Two Sides to Every Story2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I thought you were my fear. | Being silent is my fear.
Now I just want you back. | I'll always have your back.
I have to keep this on track. | I will keep it on track.
I'm sorry that I hurt you. | I'm sorry that I hurt you.
I'm not sure what to do. | I wonder what you'll do.
A slight buzz is what I feel. | My thoughts you barely feel.
I wonder if you're real. | I promise that I'm real.
I'll never forget the pain. | I'm sorry for all the pain.
You drove me so insane. | You're not really insane.
What if it happens again? | It will never happen again.
How can I call you my friend? | You are my closest friend.
I just want to be happy. | I want you to be happy.
Can I still be me? | Can you accept me?
So What Do I Do?If only I could read your mindSo What Do I Do?3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
If only I could interpret you emotions
Understand what you're going through
See through your eyes
Hear through your ears
Feel through your heart
If only I knew how to help you
But I can't
And I don't
And it's killing me
So what do I do?
never thought I'd be like thisI never thoughtnever thought I'd be like this3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'd be like this,
with broekn smiles
and scarred up wrists.
No, I never thought
I'd be like this
back when my world
was filled with joy.
I would cry so much,
and have to remember
faded out scars.
I never thought
I would feel alone
when I was a little girl.
Back when days were simple
and cooties still existed.
When I'd smile and play,
and had such big dreams.
of reaching for the sky,
of singing on stage,
and becoming president.
but it never crossed my mind
that I'd feel pain,
and cry so much
and that my pleas would go unheard
I thought the world
was a happy place,
for me as a little girl,
and I never thought
I'd be this way.
all torn apart,
and hoping to be fixed.
never thought the
pain would last
I thought there'd atleast be someone there,
someone who loved me
and cared for me.
but never as a little girl.
had I thought
those dreams would be
and I'd be here
left in pain.
no I never thought
as a little girl
that i'd end up
the way I am...
I Am, Who Are You?I am thirteen years old.I Am, Who Are You?3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses.
I am proud.
I am strong.
I am unique.
I am a poet.
I am an artist.
I have Bipolar Disorder.
I have hallucinations.
I have delusions.
I am not crazy.
I am not strange.
I am different.
I am me.
Who are you?
DrowningIt’s like people move around me in wavesDrowning8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
And I’m in the middle of the ocean
but not because of them
Because of everything in my head
Everything up there that’s just slowly moving through me
Until it reaches my heart
And then it just settles there
With no plans to move out or shut up
Just screaming at me
With an utter silence, deafening my feelings
And I know that it’s happening
I am aware
But I can’t do anything
And no one else cares
Because nobody is there
Letter To a StrangerYou do not recognize my nameLetter To a Stranger3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Nor am I in knowledge of yours
Though we have never met before
I feel the need to speak with you
To tell you stories of my life
And you provide me with the same
But before we start a friendship
I wish to ask you a few things
Thus, your undivided focus
Is what I need from you right now
Can you pay fervant attention
To every word that passes my lips?
In years past, I have met people
Who love surface phenomena
And fail to dive deeper than that
Refuse to connect ideas
Will you hear the depths of my verse
And perceive me for who I am?
And many of these same people
Have done nothing to assist me
With any hardship I have faced
Have not been there to support me
Do you keep an eye out for friends
To have their backs in trying times?
When there arrives a dire moment
That requires a frank dialogue
And an unfettered honesty
Without any hesitation
Would you call out my behaviour
When it is less than savory?
All these things I ask in my search
For a deep, genuine friends