Mental self-harmSelf-harm isn't always about harming yourself physically.
Very often it's also about mental harm, in some cases all about mental harm.
I for one have never ever cut myself, even though I've played with the thought.
But for many years I've harmed myself with my own mind.
Digging deep mental holes in which I tried to bury myself when I couldn't handle all the chaos going on.
A lot of times I've harmed myself by forcing myself to not make myself heard when what I really needed was someone to speak to.
Ignored friends when they tried to reach out and help me. And then coming back and begged for help just to repeat the same damn mistake over and over again.
I don't do shit like that very often anymore. But sometimes I just can't do any better than close every possible way into my heart and mind, and just shut everyone out. Even close friends that I care about. They who care about me.
In the long run, and most of the time in the short run too, it's nothing else but self destructive. Obviousl
I Used To BeI used to be so optimisticI Used To Be2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I used to pray and hope and love
But I closed my eyes and lost it
And now I live in lands of frost
Growing up killed all my dreams
It made me see the World
I used to laugh and love and breathe
But now I'm caught in life so cold
I used to be so sure of living
I used to smile to myself
Unaware of the World I lived in
And unaware of strength of wealth
I'll never be what I did dream
I'll never see the world I wanted
I can't afford to still believe
In dreams that only ended haunted
I'm Fine"Are you okay?"I'm Fine2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
No. I'm dying. I have to push myself to wake up in the morning, and when I finally do, I want to go back to sleep. Even my best dreams are becoming nightmares. I can't taste food, I can't stand the things I used to love. I'm breaking. I'm fading. I'm dying.
I Am One Of Jehovah's WitnessesI am a thirteen year old girl.I Am One Of Jehovah's Witnesses2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I am a poet.
I am beautiful in my own way.
I am powerful.
I am unique.
I am special.
I am not crazy.
I am not worthless.
I am not brainwashed.
I am a human being.
I make mistakes. And I admit that.
I cause trouble, sometimes a lot of trouble.
I have a disorder that affects me day to day.
I don't think I'm perfect. In fact, I know I'm not.
I tolerate the ignorance.
I tolerate the pain.
I tolerate the hatred.
I tolerate the disgusted looks.
I accept the fact that I am different.
But can't you accept the fact that we're exactly the same?
from your mirror.. with loveStand at mefrom your mirror.. with love2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Glare at me
Your hair at me.
your eyes like
daggers and spears.
I'm not cruel
BullyShh.Bully2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Demons in the shadows
They'll find a way
To get you.
Beatings, swallowing you.
Scars, defining you.
You know you're weak.
You can't fight a bully
When the bully's inside of you.
So What Do I Do?If only I could read your mindSo What Do I Do?2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
If only I could interpret you emotions
Understand what you're going through
See through your eyes
Hear through your ears
Feel through your heart
If only I knew how to help you
But I can't
And I don't
And it's killing me
So what do I do?
AwayI want to fly away,Away2 years ago in Concrete Poetry More Like This
up, in the sky.
down, back to earth.
I want to go.
Away, anywhere, nowhere, somewhere.
Leave, let go, live.
I want to fly away,
somewhere I can stay.
Music is my everythingMusic is my everything2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Music is my everything
Music is my soul, my life
I listen intently, feeling
as calm as the oceans surface
Music is my friends, My family
its my lullaby, our loving song
I will die saving those people
who I regaurd close to in my life
Music saves me, never lets me go
I sing along, to unknown words
Bu the makes me feel real
Im not a dream, like a person
Music saves my soul, my life,
I live for my friends, my family,
they are my everything,
they are my life, my soul,
my headphoneless music,
I will protect them
with my own life.
Music is the soul,
I will listen intently,
singing along to unknown words
Two Sides to Every StoryCan't believe you're not here. | Can't you see I'm still here?Two Sides to Every Story1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
I thought you were my fear. | Being silent is my fear.
Now I just want you back. | I'll always have your back.
I have to keep this on track. | I will keep it on track.
I'm sorry that I hurt you. | I'm sorry that I hurt you.
I'm not sure what to do. | I wonder what you'll do.
A slight buzz is what I feel. | My thoughts you barely feel.
I wonder if you're real. | I promise that I'm real.
I'll never forget the pain. | I'm sorry for all the pain.
You drove me so insane. | You're not really insane.
What if it happens again? | It will never happen again.
How can I call you my friend? | You are my closest friend.
I just want to be happy. | I want you to be happy.
Can I still be me? | Can you accept me?
At a DistanceAt a DistanceAt a Distance9 months ago in Concrete Poetry More Like This
I keep myself far away
So that I may enjoy my Day
Ignoring men’s endless scars
So that I can go drink at the bars.
But why, isn’t isolation the bane
That will drive most insane?
Not for me, what do they care
If I go bald or pull out my hair?
At a distance I’ll stay so I’ll be at peace
I don’t want to mourn or be on someone’s emotional leash
Why? Simply because I’m human, why all the fuss?
You never cared about my work so I’m not going to cuss
Over you, him, her, not over any folk
So don’t lump me in the same bowl of yolk
As you people, didn’t you know?
That I’m not going to be a part of your show.
If that hurts you, then have fun with that.
Now whine and cry as I play with my cat
I am Me. Who are You?I am thirteen years old.I am Me. Who are You?2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I am not typical.
I am not average.
I am me.
I have been in two mental facilities.
Both times for thoughts of suicide.
I am not emo.
I am not a freak.
I am me.
My mother attempted suicide about six months ago.
My sister attempted suicide when i was eight.
But, I am not a victim.
I am not tortured.
I am me.
My father had a heart attack just over a week ago.
He was hospitalized for nine days.
He recently returned to the hospital for kidney problems.
I suffer from Bipolar Disorder with Psychotic Features.
I have hallucinations.
I have delusions.
But I am not a disorder.
I am not my difficulties.
I am not my troubles.
I am me.
Fake WonderlandA place where you want to breathe,Fake Wonderland2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
But you cannot get enough air.
A place that you want to leave,
But you can’t, you are in despair.
Freedom is something I wanted long ago.
They used to tie me up with a rope.
I am packing and now I am ready to go,
To rebuild, to change it all there is no hope.
In lies we have to swim every day,
To love we are not allowed anymore.
Anything you want you are not able to say,
They throw you in a room and lock the door.
A fake wonderland that no one can escape,
If your body is gone, your soul will stay.
The truth they can no longer shape,
They want to throw it to the sea away!
You freed me from this chain,
Now my soul can for a while rest.
I want to love you, but I am insane:
To alter this realm I try my best!
My voice?I tried to smile,My voice?2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
laugh through the pain,
but it's been a while,
I think I'm insane.
I can't hear my own voice.
The one that says what I want.
Now I have no choice.
You never did, it taunts.
It tells me what I should say.
It tells me who I am.
It tells me everyday.
Am I the lion or the lamb?
Am I as weak as I feel,
or as strong as I pretend?
Am I cold and hard as steel,
or just waiting for it to end?
Who am I?
Do I really want to know?
I end with a sigh.
The voice is telling me to go.
Diaries of a boy named HateDiaries of a boy named Hate2 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
They always say everyone wants love.
So how come they don't think that's not the case for me?
Why do they point their fingers at me?
Why do they walk away?
Look down at me?
Spit at me?
Why do they...