Stop Ignoring Me!A/N: Remus and Sirius slash. Don't like? Don't read.Stop Ignoring Me!3 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
"You're acting like a child!"
Remus rolled his eyes and continued on his way out of the Gryffindor common room, not looking back at the other teen who was calling out his name.
With a huff, Sirius sat back down in his seat on the couch right beside James who was trying his hardest to hide his smirk. "How long's it been?" he asked while managing to sound nonchalant.
"3 days," Sirius mumbled, slouching more in his seat as he crossed his arms over his chest as he pouted. It had been an accident, it really had, but Remus still blamed Sirius for his essay being ruined by his tea. It wasn't Sirius's fault that the drink had been resting on a small stack of books by said essay and that he'd accidentally on purpose bumped into the table to get Remus's attention which caused the cup to topple over. "He's never ignored me this long before."
"Have you tried apologizing?" Peter suggested, not looking up from the Muggle m
Draco the IncompetentPairing: Harry Potter/Draco MalfoyDraco the Incompetent3 years ago in Romance More Like This
Rating: a mild T
If the story seems familiar, it's because it has been made into a comic-- info below.
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter universe belongs to JK Rowling, and I just play around in it for fun
"Don't be silly, Draco. No one is staring at you. Come along."
Pansy was just flat-out lying to him. As he followed her into the clerical department of the Ministry, absolutely everyone stared at Draco. Several middle-age ladies exchanged significant looks. As he passed them, he could hear them whisper: "A pity, isn't it? Such a promising young man. Did 'outstanding' in most of his OWLs. Something terrible happened to him in the war, though. A shame, such a handsome boy unmarriageable."
Pansy led him through the desks and to a small office. A sixtyish woman looked up from her work. "Ah, here he is, our new errand boy. How are you today, Draco?" she said in the sort of voice one used for dogs and small childr
J. R. R. TolkienJust see who entersJ. R. R. Tolkien4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
the realm of dreams
that none have seen
legends of old
Molding them into
Reaping the fruits
that in his mind grow
to rivers of words
that from his pen flow
Travel through the lands,
follow the dream
He gives you his hand...
Enter with him!
Death To DickensDeath To Dickens9 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Death To Dickens
Dickens should die,
Put his head on a pike.
His disemboweled corpse
Is something I'd like.
Dickens should die.
His book? It sucks bad.
The Tale of Two Cities
Is driving me mad.
Dickens should die.
So called "master of prose."
I guess he was great
In old times, I suppose.
Dickens should die.
Dear God! I hate him!
They called him a genius
I think he was dim.
His book has a little
Or no plot at all,
And I can't understand
His old jumbled up scrawl!
A book should be art!
A grand tapestry weaved.
But his dirty old twine
of a book has me peeved.
Now Patterson says,
"He's a God among bugs"
Which proves Pat's lost marbles
Are swept under the rugs.
"Dickens should die!"
My mantra remains
For every word we've read
We'll double his pains
Dickens should die!
It has to be said.
The only small problem?
He's already dead.
You're Beautiful.Hey you.You're Beautiful.2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
You may not think so.. Many people don't, but what makes you special is that you're you, and you better not let anyone change you. Ever. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. You might express yourself completely different than others or you might appear ordinary butbut your personality will definitely stand out.. If you let yourself stand out(: accept who you are, and you'll feel better about yourself. That's hard to do? Well, everyone's been there at some point in their lives but go. Yes, get up and go. Go find a mirror. Look into it. I'm serious. Spend a few minutes.. Look at your eyes(: what do you like about them? The color.. The shape? Your long, amazing eyelashes? There has to be something you like! Now, look at the rest of your body. Does society judge you for your exterior? If so, I have three magical words that I want you to say anytime someone gets you down.. Or when you're feeling self conscious and unhappy about yourself.
Late Night Texts 25(Group Message Sam and Dean Winchester)Late Night Texts 253 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
C: Dean. Sam. We must help the mighty Thorin Oakenshield reclaim his stolen homeland of Erebor.
D: What the hell are you talking about?
S: I meant to tell you this earlier.
S: I took him to go see the Hobbit.
D: Why would you do that?! You know he gets weird ass ideas.
C: Dean, we must go help him. He could die without us.
D: Why should I give a rat's ass?
C: He is a majestic ruler, Dean. His majesticness must be saved for future generations.
D: His what?
C: His majescticness.
D: What the hell?
S: Thorin was pretty majestic. I have to admit that.
C: Then you understand, Sam! We have to go help the Dwarves reclaim Erebor!
S: You know what, Cas, you're right. You and Dean should get ready and be on your way tonight.
D: Sam, what are you doing?
S: I'll even go find you a bow and arrow. You can match wits with Kíli.
D: Sam, what the hell are you doing?
S: I'll pack your provisions.
D: Sam, stop it.
S: I'll even call Gandalf for you.
C: Dean, Sam is g
LotR OuttakesThe Fellowship of the Ring Movie OuttakesLotR Outtakes8 years ago in Fan Fiction More Like This
Gandalf tells Frodo about his ring
Gandalf snatches the envelope, throws it on the fire and watches it burn
Frodo: What are you doing!
Gandalf reaches for the tongs and goes to take the ring out of the fire
Gandalf: Oh *bleep* Ive lost it!!
Frodo bursts out giggling as Gandalf continues to poke the fire
Director: Cut! Props!!
Escape on Buckleberry Ferry
The hobbits are running around in the trees shouting as the Ringwraith tries to catch them while they run for Buckleberry ferry .
Sam, Pippin and Merry get away faster and as Frodo is dancing with the Ringwraith Pippin runs straight into a tree
Pippin: *bleep*!! *loud crunch as he hits the floor*
The Ringwraith falls of its horse laughing as Frodo bursts into a fit of giggles and Sam crashes into a tree trying to see what the commotion is .
Sam: *bleep* ouch my nose hurts!&
100 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do in Middle-Earth1: I will not give hobbits green hair and orange skin and call them "Oompa Loompas".100 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do in Middle-Earth3 years ago in Humor More Like This
2: I will not swallow the Phial of Galadriel to see if it will shine inside my stomach.
3: I will not eat popcorn during dramatic moments.
4: I will not ask Saruman if a house fell on his sister.
5: I will not claim Sauron's Eye watches me while I'm showering.
6: The One Ring is not my bling.
7: I am not a paparazzi.
8: I will not roast marshmallows in Mount Doom.
9: I will not shave Gandalf's beard...
10: ...Nor will I shave Legolas bald.
11: I will not follow Gollum with an accordion and insist he must dance or else.
12: I will not make a tree house inside an Ent.
13: I will not wolf whistle when Aragorn and Arwen are making out, nor will I shout "GET SOME!"
14: I will not sing the Spider-Pig song when in Shelob's lair.
15: I will not "poke" Sauron's flaming eye with a pitchfork.
16: I will not shout "GO, GO, POWER RANGERS!" before slipping on the One Ring.
17: I will not give a hobbit a pedicure.
Let That Be As It May [MorMor]That wasn’t supposed to happen. It should have been a not friendly but still peaceful business meeting, not an exchange of potentially lethal shots. But when you worked for James Moriarty you could never be sure of what was waiting ahead for you. For that reason, and for many others he had learnt during the years spent at the madman’s side, Sebastian Moran was always ready. For what, he didn’t know, but still prepared pretty much for everything. And they had to thank his quick reflexes if the people with a bullet in the skull were some of their client’s men and not them.Let That Be As It May [MorMor]1 year ago in General Fiction More Like This
The sniper had felt the atmosphere of the small Finnish cottage getting colder and colder and he calmly had crossed his arms, his right hand casually resting on the gun hidden in his jacket and the left tapping on the one he had secured on his hip. He wasn’t exactly listening to the discussion going on between the Russian man and his employer, he was too busy keeping an eye on the armed me
Keep Calm and Welcome to Middle-earthKeep Calm and Welcome to Middle-earthKeep Calm and Welcome to Middle-earth9 months ago in Humor More Like This
Keep Calm and Eat Lembas
Keep Calm and Don’t Make Oaths
Keep Calm and Listen to Prophecies - They are Important
Keep Calm and Don’t Offend Feanor
Keep Calm and Don’t Offend Feanor’s Sons
Keep Calm and GET THEE GONE!
Keep Calm and Don’t Look into a Dragon’s Eyes
Keep Calm and Don’t Marry Someone with Amnesia
Keep Calm and Wait for the Elves
Keep Calm and… where’s Fingon?
Keep Calm and… where’s the ambassadorial party?
Keep Calm and… BALROG!
Keep Calm and Kill the Balrog - You’re going to die anyways
Keep Calm and You Shall Not Pass
Keep Calm and… FANGIRLS!!!!
Keep Calm; You are Doomed for Life
Keep Calm and Don’t Ambush a Feanorion
Keep Calm and Don’t Enter Dark Scary Forests
Keep Calm and Don’t Enter Nan Elmoth
Keep Calm and those Sindar…
Keep Calm and Count in Quenya
Keep Calm and… FLYING DRAGONS!
Keep Calm and DRAG
Lord Of The SystemLord Of The System11 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
Rick Rubin- One ring to rule them all...one ring to...uhhh...own them! One ring to *thinks* look at them all! And in the darkness...bind them! *Cackles evilly*
Serj- *plays his flute* Oh golly gee...I found this ring...*holds the ring*
John- Uhhh...is it worth any money?! *Eyes light up*
Serj- I dont think so...but I can play piano!
John- Shut up...I know...hmm, I say we waste time and go destroy this ring in Mordor!
Serj- Hmmm...not bad *gets up packing random things and puts on his cloak* Come Johnwise. *walks out journeying* My fucking feet hurt!
John- I'm wearing my new shoes I bought with...MONEY! Guess, where I got the money, Serj?
Serj- *rolls eyes* Where?
John- I dont know...*tilts his head* But I'm really sexy...Serj, if I was a girl would you fuck me?
Serj- Id fuck you if you weren't a girl...*coughs* I mean...no, you ugly bitch!
John- *tear* Oh okay then...*walks through the dark forest* God, this forest is so dark, you better hold me, Serj
Serj- *holds John* Uhhh
TF High 16TF High Chapter 16: Howling MadTF High 166 years ago in Science Fiction More Like This
"ABSOLUTLY NOT!" Coach Grey yelled as he stood in the school's doorway. "I can't let any unauthorized persons on school ground!, "But it's of the utmost importance that we talk to Principle Miller right away!" Peggy replied. "No can do, unless you're a student or faculty I can't let you in without an appointment!" Coach Grey said for what had been about the 5th time in the last 10 minutes. "But Miss. Perkins wouldn't make an appointment for us, couldn't you jus " "Let me handle this Peggy" Brandi interrupted, "Now look here you sorry excuse for a substitute! The transformations here are getting worse and worse, and you won't be able to stop them if we don't talk to Miss Miller, so why don't you just back off and "
"NO, no one gets in without an appointment", Coach Grey started again "Now scram before I ", "That's quite enough MrRrr. Grey!" said a authoritative, and rather annoyed sounding, voice from behind Coach Grey. Turning round the gr
Lord of the Monty Python 2Lord of the Monty Python 26 years ago in Fan Fiction More Like This
The Two Towers (That Sank into the Swamp)
Aragorn: The story so far
(Gilliam-style animation of Gandalf and the Balrog falling into the chasm of Khazud-dûm)
Aragorn: Meanwhile we are still kinda busy, too
(Cut to live-action shots of the Three Hunters Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli running westwards in hot pursuit of the Uruk-hai that abducted Merry and Pippin. The Fellowship theme plays in the background, with undertones of the King Arthur theme)
Gimli: Och, keep breathing, Gimli! Thats the key! Breathe!
Legolas: They run as if the very whips of their masters were behind them!
(Suddenly, Aragorn pulls up sharply, causing his companions to cannon into him from behind, sending them sprawling)
Gimli: What did ye stop for, laddie?
Aragorn: Legolas, what to your Elf-eyes see?
Legolas: Someone comes
(Coming into view, they see a company of Rohan soldiers gallo
RT King AU - BasicsRT King AU inspired by Mallius on TumblrRT King AU - Basics1 year ago in General Fiction More Like This
Mad King Ryan blog following this AU: http://the-mad-vagabond.tumblr.com/
The Kingdom of Achievement City is ever-changing. The world is not what we would consider a world, rather a plane of dimension. What the Kingdom rules over is uncertain, but mortals cannot enter it. It can be seen as a Heaven, as the Nether is seen as Hell, but the Kingdom isn’t anything close to the peaceful and wonderful idea of Heaven. It is a place of turmoil and hardship, and certainly not for the faint of heart. While you can never truly die there, as you just simply return but with everything of your previous ‘life’ gone, you can still feel pain. It is a land of creation and destruction, and only a selected few can survive there. While the land has their Leaders, there must be a King to rule the Kingdom.
How a King is chosen is different to normal royal systems. Six have been chosen, each worthy and strong in their own way. Some migh
The Little Lord of the RingsMargareth winced when she lifted the big pot of soup off the stove. Her back was getting worse and the stress she was going through these days wasnt helping. Her husband had lost his job in the mines and her little boy had finally reached puberty.The Little Lord of the Rings7 years ago in Fantasy More Like This
Sauron! she yelled. Dinners ready!
In a minute! came his reply from downstairs. Two weeks ago, he had decided he didnt like his old room anymore and moved his stuff to the basement. His dungeon, he called it.
No, not in a minute. Right now! she yelled back. You said "in a minute" five minutes ago!
She sighed and gave her husband a tired look.
Marten, put that scroll away and tell him to come.
In a mi- he started to say, saw her face and put the scroll away.
Sauron! Listen to your mom and get over here this second!
She heard him climb the stairs, deliberately dragging his feet just to annoy her. When he came into view
The Lord of the Rings AlphabetThe Lord of the Rings Alphabet10 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Disclaimer thing: No, Lord of the Rings doesn't belong to me, but it was nice of you to ask. It belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien, Chris Tolkien and…Affiliates. So there.
Author's Note: During the making of this glorious poem, I was without my books and I couldn't remember anything that began with K, Q, or X, so I left them empty for the time, obviously ruining the continuity later. However, these three terrific letters are put in at the end of the poem simply because I couldn't stand to see them left out in the cold. I even had them rhyme! Yay!
May you please enjoy very well!
A is for Aragorn, so soon to be king.
B is for Bilbo, who found the One Ring.
C is for Caradhras, a snowy mountainous wall.
D is for Dunedain, Aragorn's kin, proud and tall.
E is for Eowyn, beautiful maiden with blade.
F is for Frodo, a perilous journey he made.
G is for Gandalf, a wizard wise and brave.
H is for Haldir: in the movie, meets his grave. *sob*
Assassin's Creed II: EternityAssassin's Creed II: Eternity5 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
October, 1476. Firenze. Italia.
The people's shouts filled the air with a haunting resonance. He couldn't see what stood at the center of the frenzied mass, but he didn't need to see to know. His feet carried him closer to the podium and through the clumped mass before him. It was early October, the fall season in full swing upon the Italian city-state of Firenze. And today, three men stood upon the gallows awaiting the swift hand of fate to claim their lives as prize.
"Giovanni Auditore," A voice boomed out over the indecipherable shouts of the mob. The mention of his father's name stopped Ezio dead in his tracks. His heart beat quickened as he silently joined the crowd to watch the matter at hand.
"You and your accomplices stand accused of the crime of treason. Do you have any evidence to counter this charge?"
"Yes;" His father shouted in reply. "The documents that were delivered to you last night!" That was right. Ezio himself hadn't slept a wink after he'd delivered them himself to
Proposal"Daddy, why aren't you and Papa married?"Proposal3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
That was a good question, wasn't it? One answer that popped in Tony's mind was that he never though about getting married. But well, he never thought he'd be living with Captain America or that he would adopt a child. A few years ago if someone said that one day there would be a small 6 year-old boy in his garage watching him work, Tony would laugh so hard he'd probably fall into a coma.
"I don't know, Peter."
"Do you want to marry him?"
Tony stopped to think. Did he want to marry Steve? He already woke up next to him every morning, they took Peter to school together, had meals together, cleaned the house together, told bedtime stories to Peter together. A formal marriage wasn't necessary. But 'needing' and 'wanting' were different things, and Peter asked Tony if he wanted to marry Steve.
"You know, I think I do."
"Why don't you ask him?" Of course Peter would ask that, because Peter was a child and when you're a child things are that si
Thilbo "You're a bloody idiot!" Thorin yelled at Bilbo, forcing the Halfling against the rocky mountainside. "You could have gotten yourself killed!" His fist slammed down on the rock beside Bilbo's cheek.Thilbo3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Bilbo met Thorin's furious eyes, confused but defiant. "I saved you."
"For which I am eternally grateful," Thorin snarled, the truth in his words startling Bilbo. "But my life is not worth yours." His voice was soft, pain shining in his eyes. The fist that landed near Bilbo's face uncurled, moving slowly to the Halfling's cheek, cupping it gently. "My life will never be worth yours."
"You're wrong," Bilbo's voice was soft, so soft in fact that it was barely audible, but the words still fell upon Thorin's ears. Thorin cocked his head, noticing that Bilbo didn't push his hand away. He let his thumb explore the hobbit's face, amazed by the lack of facial hair. He had never felt skin so smooth in his life.
Smeagol's SongIn the dark and unlit deepSmeagol's Song4 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
There must poor Smeagol weep
Nasty hobbitses threw us out
With loud and angry shouts
We just wished shiny ring
To be our birthday thing
Greedy Deagol answered nay
For that we made him pay
Precious made Smeagol smile
Before our luck turned vile
Angry hobitses drove us away
So we fled the light of day
In the dark and unlit deep
There did pour Smeagol weep
Changing slowly over time
While we on fish did dine
Our eyes grew big and bright
Good to see with little light
Gaunt we became, and bleak
Good to in the mountain sneak
We forgots our own name
And even who to blame
Gollum, gollum, our song
Living in the dark so long
In the dark and unlit deep
There must sneaky Gollum keep
Living between rock and pool
Hidden deep nice and cool
But the precious us betrayed
And from our finger strayed
Cheated riddels in the deep
Made hobbit our precious keep
We was searching everywhere
And hiding for the nasty stare
Until we found the precious back
Hidden in new master's sack
Lord of the Rings ABCsLord of the Rings ABCs9 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A is for brave Aragorn whom Arwen did admire
B is for the Balrog and dear Bilbo of the Shire
C is for the courage of the heroes in the story
D for the Dead Marshes, which the hobbitses found gory
E is for Lord Elrond and the Elvish clan he leads
F is for young Frodo and his mighty, noble deeds
G is for ol' Gandalf, little Gimili and (yuck!) Gollum
H is for Helms Deep and the battle at the bottom
I is for Isildur, too bad he kept the ring
J is jubilation at the return of the King
K is for dark Khazad-dum, where orcish evil lies
L is for *sigh* Legolas, what dreamy, crystal eyes
M is for Meriadoc, known as Merry by his friends
N is for the Nazgul, nasty creatures to the end
O is for Osgiliath, the mighty, broken city
P for Peregrin (Pippin) Took's insatiable curiosity
Q is for the quiet way of life back at Bag End
R for peaceful Rivendell and the Rohhirim that Rohan sends
S is for good Samwise, and Shelob whom he slew
(not to mention Saruma
the hobbit: 30 years lateri know this bridge across the Water and the meander of this path under the Hill.the hobbit: 30 years later5 years ago in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
each round door i pass is a milestone marking years and leagues of experiences and growth.
and as i approach my destination
- that green door, sigil-etched -
i am greeted with a sense of homecoming in the ghosts of smoke rings and 'good morning's.
the first time i called
at bag end.
Water Park Fun +Draco/Harry+The heat was horrible and hot. Terribly hot but that was just Draco whining because despite what he thought, muggles had their ways of getting cool and the biggest was a water park.Water Park Fun +Draco/Harry+3 years ago in Humor More Like This
That's where he was with Potter, his husband for the past six years, as well as the young boy that was created from their DNA named Jeremy. Oh, and of course the Weasleys with their kids. Draco wasn't too happy about that because, one, they were Weasleys and two, they were loud, and three, they were Weasleys!
"I wanna go on the red one!"
"Yellow one, yellow one!"
"Mom, I need to go potty."
Jeremy however, wasn't as loud as them. He was well behaved and very smart. Too smart at times that it made Draco feel awkward at times when he couldn't answer his many questions. Jeremy was observant and looked around but when he saw just how big the slides were, he gripped his fathers' hands.
"Which one do you want to go first, J