Curiosity Killed the Self Confidence.I've been fighting off the curiosity,
who I am and who I'll be.
This chip on my shoulder,
my destructive tendencies,
they've become the better part of me.
I don't have the sense of self,
the childlike wonder,
I once adored.
Because I've spent months,
Reeling from the sadness,
scraping myself up from the floor.
But I spend my time grasping for someone,
who wont hurt,
and won't betray..
And I know deep down,
that I should dream to be something more..
But I'm afraid
I've been shaken,
down at the core.
Behind the MaskFor a while now,Behind the Mask3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
There's been a mask.
A mask to over my face,
So people wont see the real me.
Wont see how broken I am.
How broken my life is.
There was one day,
That I thought it was the right time to let go of my mask.
My security blanket.
I let myself feel.
I let myself care.
I let myself get hurt.
I've learned to much,
To be this stupid.
I guess old habits die hard.
Maybe one day I'll actually be happy,
And not wear my mask to cover it all up.
A New and Bright FriendshipIt's always been hard to explain my feelingsA New and Bright Friendship3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
But right now I'm speechless
I've never thought I could care so much
Yet here I am
Offering my help and support
No matter what.
Some of my darkest corners
Smile when I talk to you
My worries begin to fade
And my stomach feels warm
A new and bright friendship
I'm just glad I met you.
poemhere i lay beside youpoem3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
gazing upon you bare before me
and in the curves of your body i can see my future unraveling
every pore in your skin a new adventure
every other centimeter calling out
waiting to be touched
and i cannot resist
i cannot withhold
the desire within me
to embark on a voyage through you
filling every crevise
until i can recall each piece of you as if it were my own
and end my journey
resting my head upon the peaks of your breasts
able to hear your heartbeat
like a song that only sounds when we are together
telling us that in this moment
it is only us
and will remain that way forever
Another NightThe boy watched as night fell.Another Night3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
He knew what was coming.
Soon he would be in hell.
His emotions were numbing.
Ever night was the same.
He'd suffer all alone.
He'd play this evil game.
The feeling was well known.
First would come the boredom,
then the sadness and apin;
and then he would panic;
his thoughts would go insane.
With the razor in hand,
his wrists were in danger.
More cuts, his thoughts demand,
his mind full of anger.
This self-harming he craved
was awful for his health.
He needed to be saved;
who'd save him from himself?
He watched the viscous blood
as it circled the drain.
He fainted with a "thud"
whilst outside, fell the rain.
His loud alarm woke him.
He peered in the mirror.
The light was on, though dim,
so he could see clearer.
He rubbed his eyes awhile.
"Another day," he sighed.
He put on his smile;
behind it he would hide.
Fragile Little ThingHave you ever felt like your heart was gonna collapse?Fragile Little Thing3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Just give in from all the pressure that's building up
Inside your chest
You start to get that hot feeling
That spreads throughout you
You can feel it as tears gather
Just waiting to be released
Your breathing goes ragged
And your heart starts racing
It's the sign of a breakdown
You're on the verge
Of everything falling apart
Like you're shattering
Into a million pieces of glass
Without any hope
Of ever putting the pieces back together again
HappinessShe leaves me frequently, without warning-Happiness3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
this capricious lover of mine.
Without provocation, she deserts me;
without rhyme or reason she leaves me to
complete her madness in the dark.
I forget often that she is Master
and I mustn't question her actions
even though they leave me at a loss.
As I standby, and learn to dissect myself
like an insect speared on a peg,
or a corpse rotting in some grimy catacomb,
I must recite the mantra:
she is god. She is god.
Fragments of days pass by me
and I, in a haze of half-forgotten memory, cannot piece together
any singular moment in time
that could connect to anything else.
There is only her,
and her spindly hands upon my throat
before she finishes her rounds
and smugly skips away.
I try fruitlessly to pick up the
shattered remains of what was once a human life.
Her face is tattooed on my soul.
Her voice echoes in the lonely halls of my memory.
Her touch is a scar upon my existence.
I cannot salvage a thing.
And then, just like the tide,
Twelve/Twenty-Nine/Twelve That night when it was just you and me,Twelve/Twenty-Nine/Twelve3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
laying on your bed in complete silence, you kissed me.
It was quick and all I could do was stare at you while I felt
my finger touch my bottom lip, as if something that had been
there my whole life, had now been stolen away.
You looked back at me and we both met in the middle,
only stopping to take the breaths we unfortunately
needed to take to stay alive. I had never in my life fallen
into anyone the way I had fallen into you, it felt like
I was lost somewhere only you could pull me out of,
and the only way to do that, was to take your lips off of mine.
You kept grabbing my face and pulling me closer to you,
my hands were busy grasping at any part of your body I could reach
to feel you against me, but I just could not get close enough.
It felt like I needed you, I didn't necessarily want you, I fucking needed you.
It's been hard not to keep track of the days, but I have,
and it's been fourteen of them. I can't stop thinking about
My Guard Is UpI was so vulnerable a long time agoMy Guard Is Up3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
That my heart has put up walls.
My heart is being guarded by walls,
So that I don't get hurt again.
Maybe that's why I don't fall in love easily.
Maybe that's why I don't know how to love someone.
I am so scared of getting hurt that I distance myself,
And I don't show my feelings to the one's I love.
I keep everything bottled up inside
Because I don't know how to show you my feelings.
I don't know if you will understand any of this,
But I will try my best to show you how I feel.
My guard is up because I don't want to get hurt.
My heart has put up walls,
And it has no desired to tear them down.
By: Veronica Allen
Social AtrocityPaper thin morals and a paradoxical existence.Social Atrocity3 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Life would be so great if you could only run the distance.
All being and nothingness,an empty shell of presence.
Your pity becomes you and your existence precedes your essence.
You don't know what you want or are,
or what you even hoped for.
I can see your blank and empty eyes looking down on me.
Is this pointless figure everything you dreamed to be?
You are a download.
Your empty conscious leaves your imagination free.
A digital monstrosity, a simple thing of mediocrity.
Painful and cold, your life has been sold.
Your thoughts are compressed and hardwired.
Your ideas are not yours and your soul is tired.
Your purpose has been greatly exaggerated.
AphroditeRoses shall not narrate thy holy eyesAphrodite3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Undone by love, stars in disguise
Bejewled fair face, only thou fit
A blossom of hope that never wilts
Bound by spell only thee I think of
Angel thou I love by the name Above
Indeed crystalline thine ethereal face
Like a trinket shaped with Lord's grace
Or the falling benevolent winter snow
Valor wings thy hast heaven aglow
Enchanting thy lips take my sight
Young and tantalized thy beloved heart
One that shudders but never falls apart
Untying my hands Angel show me light.
Hell Doesn't Even KnowI want to cry so much...Hell Doesn't Even Know3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Maybe I'm happy,
Maybe I'm sad.
I feel so alone,
Yet I've been with people all day.
I feel so unloved,
Yet I know I have people who love me.
I can't talk about these feelings.
I can't open up when the door is locked.
And the key is lost.
I want to inspire,
But I just recieve empathy.
I want to die,
But I keep on breathing.
I feel so confused, lost and all alone.
The feelings inside me are too strong for my body.
I don't want someone to understand.
I want someone to give me the answers to why I am like this.
And a solution to fix the massacre inside me...
Deep WithinI've taken what I've held withinDeep Within3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
And shoved my hand real deep
And pulled out what was inside
What I held so deep within me
It's black and hollow
And nothing can be heard from it
Even though it's screaming
No one's ears will it ever reach
It was thrashing, turning and pulling
On everything that held me together
Making everything it touched negative
And making me hard to be around
It killed my heart
It burned my soul
And threw it down a well
Because no one needs a heart or friends
When you have loneliness
The Pain WithinLet go of your hate,The Pain Within4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Your revenge can wait.
Whoever did you wrong,
Can never know the hurt,
That made you strong.
You know it's a part,
Of you're aching heart.
Whoever broke your smile,
Can never understand the pain,
That turned you vile.
Don't give up on love,
Though you'll feel rough.
Whoever killed your hope,
Can never believe the longing,
That more you cope.
WeaknessI lay my head down to sleep,Weakness3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Always hoping I never wake.
I walk blindly across the street,
Praying drivers make a mistake.
I am naked in a blizzard,
Shards of ice pierce my heart.
I am numb to joys I never knew
My insides have been torn apart.
I am lost under the sea,
Lungs screaming, miles from air.
I fake a smile and pretend to hear
But I am deaf, a mask I wear.
I stand on lifeless stony ledge,
Below I sense the water's hunger.
I cannot force myself to jump
And yet can't stand pain any longer.
The Old WellMy destiny calls from the depths of the well,The Old Well3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
The sound of the water my own death knell.
Spirits pass upwards and through the stone,
Leaving behind pennies people have thrown.
The well is filled with the souls of others,
All of whom strayed from the same path.
Every fate as damned as another's,
Consumed by this ancient curse's wrath.
Mysteries surround this age-old dwelling,
I, a servant of this ancient foretelling.
My heart lies at its base,
My life removed without a trace.
SanctuarySanctuary, this place that I find in only one place.Sanctuary3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Yet the torment of the world still reaches me there
Their words do not matter.
But the way they watch drives me crazy
This Sanctuary I find alone
Brings peace to my soul
As it rips and tears through my flesh.
Oh Beautiful Sanctuary.
I'll Make My Own WayBiting my lips until they bleedI'll Make My Own Way3 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Because there's no one here to kiss them
Sat in the dark because no one needs me with them
Trapped in a cold, dark padded cell
It's meant to be a refuge but it feels like hell
I need the key but I don't even know if there is one
You said it would be easier than this
I don't deserve any of this
Please can someone take me far away from this
Before there's nothing left of me
Because it's just me now
No one else to hold me tight
I'll sing the lullabies to myself
To help me get through the night
And if someone else comes along
To take me out of this place
I'll welcome them with open arms
And a smile upon my face
But don't think for a second that I'll trust you
I've been deceived far too much
I've learnt how to read the hidden signs
Of a lying man's touch
So give me the key out of here
And I'll escape, run so far away
But I won't want anyone else with me
I'll make my own way
Dreaming of those future days
Where freedom will come find me
I'll run away even if th
Crank Up The MusicCrank up the music,Crank Up The Music3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
And drown out reality.
Let it consume you,
And make your dreams come alive.
You can be anything that you want.
Just become one with the music.
When the music is on,
Your life is different.
Nothing else matters but the music you are listening to.
So crank up the music,
And tune out reality.
Become one with the music.
By: Veronica Allen
Love Like PoisonAll the stress is pulling me under, tie me up and throw me in. I want to drown in you, I want to leak into your flesh and get under your skin. You have the perfect body for infection, I want to make it my home. Mark me with your deadly bite, your violent kiss, toxin dripping from your lips. The disease is slowly spreading through your heart and lungs, stinging and eating away at your brain, but deep down, you know you like it that way. Let the sickness devour you, swallow you whole. Your body is mine, your blood is mine, your heart and mind and soul are mine. I can rip you apart so beautifully, wouldn't you like to see?Love Like Poison3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
fading segment of lifeIn memories of your lifefading segment of life3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
you've died so many times.
Memories of distant days
memories of unseen dreams.
you've died inside.
Inside of your silence,
your voice screams with
Memories of your distant life
and you'll fade inside.
In search of light,
your eyes see nothing
but the agony of your screaming
tone that never stops biting you.
You're all alone
in this fog,
living of the memories
of the life that is distant
to your sight.
Crashed and bitter
you die along with
dreams that are never going
to be seen.
BlackbirdA black winged bird sat atop a roof,Blackbird4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Nonchalantly humming its caws and coos.
For there on the street down yonder it peered,
At the coming of jeers; the walking of fear.
It saluted its foe and hopped to and fro,
Unaware that behind the mask was a heart of gold.
But the blood stained cheeks and pale white hands
Reached out for the bird, thus it succumbed to their demands.
Feathers flew in the wind from the night time air,
A whirlwind of darkness only the night could compare;
The bird found a place where it could perch and respite,
On the shoulder of a corpse oh, what a delight!
A chuckle from a mouth that the heavens forbade,
Gave room for the next few words that were said:
"Blackbird, blackbird! Why have you come?
In this unruly hour the night will be undone!
The children on the street are marching one by one,
To innocent to know that a nightmare has begun."
He clasped his hands when he finished his speech,
His shoulders were shaking in delicious relief
I Feel the Darkness Embrace Me"We'll always be close"I Feel the Darkness Embrace Me3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
That's what we said
Even if Hell froze
And we were both dead
Through all this mess
And the thick and thin
I could never love you less
My perfect twin
I don't know if you can feel it
Or is it all in my mind
Between us, there's a little split
Or are you blind
It's awkward to hold you
Like I did before
I know we're through
But still, I swore
"Lovey-dovey as a couple"
"Lovey-dovey as friends"
But now there's this bubble
And no way for amends
I admit there's a wall
And it distorts my sight
I don't want to drop the ball
But I suddenly see no light
Maybe you were always more
And never "just a friend"
But that has gone out the door
There's nothing more to mend
Are you the one I knew back then
Or are you someone I don't
Do I have to start again
Take back the seeds sown
We talk easy, but it feels so wrong
It's like I wear a mask
Do I look so cool, so strong
So you'll never have to ask
I don't tell you the tears I shed
Nor sigh or moan
Or about this chaos in my head