Whole Grain Nirvana
A while ago when you were born you woke up into a world of doctored yellow lights reflecting off pale slime green puke pink tiles fuming with vapors of dried up lemon Lysol and would have shivered cold if your wrinkly hands hand had plopped down onto the floor instead of being wrapped into a blanket and weighed on a shiny metal machine mirroring artificial suns into your pupils.
Sometimes, after a shower, and it's winter now, with black mornings & blacker coffee, I really wonder if cologne covers that infant stink that I- that we- all still carry around like dandruff in hair it just keeps coming back. I take cold showers to keep my skin & hair from drying out but when I step dripping out of the shower and onto the bathroom scale there has got to be some Freudian unconscious psychoanalytic monster creeping around immobile memories in a place too dark to see. A place that gives off gut feelings instead of emotions. And that monster is tinkering back there waiting to do harm with t
Only My ImaginationI can see you, your short brown hairOnly My Imagination2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
your big brown eyes
your smile that always gives me butterflies.
I can taste you, savory on my lips
tangy in my mouth
sweet on my tongue.
I can hear you, your calm breathing next to my ear
your steady heartbeat against my chest
your soothing voice.
I can feel you, warm against my skin
cool to the touch
burning with our joint passion.
I can smell you, your cool masculine musk
your fresh clean skin hair
your strong spiced deodorant
I am LoveEverywhere I turnI am Love2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
There's another love song.
SomeoneI need someone who feels this way about meSomeone2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Someone who will love me and won't leave
The man you were two years ago
The one I fell for
Might have been that guy
But he doesn't exist anymore
I've accepted the fact that I love someone who is not coming back
It's like loving a ghost
We used to know each other better than anyone else
Now we're strangers
Maybe this is the real you
Maybe you have no idea who you are
This could be the real me
And I'm okay with that
I don't feel crazy anymore
Honestly, I'm probably better off without you
I'm still working on believing that
I still miss you everyday
And I know that you don't miss me
I need someone who will stick with me
Through all the difficult moments
Who has seen me at my worst
And still decides to stay
I need someone to save me
Icarus Dreamsi am runningIcarus Dreams2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
with kites on runways;
slipping smiles into the breeze.
throwing paper airplanes
fluttering dreams in turbines.
i could've called anyone
there a liar--
but i only found me
inside my head.
and if i learned
i might not
afraid of flying
with the feeling of
between my fingers
It Is (Depression)It is a shroud of black velvet.It Is (Depression)2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
It is the violent ocean in the dead of night.
It is the monster in the shadows; the Vashta Nerada.
It is the final crash of symbols in Carmina Burana.
It is impossible to lift.
it is impossible to breathe.
It is impossible to see.
It is the only thing that can be heard.
It is why the stars disappear at night.
It is why every light drifts by without stopping.
It is why the gnawing starts and never ceases.
It is why nothing else matters in the end.
It is my disease.
It is my disability.
It is my misfortune.
It is my death sentence.
ComplicateToo often in our livesComplicate3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
We complicate things,
Cluttering our minds and hearts
With useless worries and fears.
Instead of drinking in the Summer sun
Or becoming mesmerized by your coffee,
You worry about getting sunburnt
And consuming too much caffeine.
We forget to take pleasure
In a simple hello and goodbye;
A smile shared, an "I love you",
A hug given for no reason.
We analyse every look and smile
Since each syllable means something;
Even a tiny thing such as an emoticon
Has a deeper meaning these days.
A simple "how are you" or "why"
Can be seen as offensive,
As too intrusive, as nosy,
Too demanding and suspicious.
Just talking to someone of the opposite gender
For more than a few minutes
Will have people automatically assuming
The two of you are in a relationship.
Instead of enjoying the music,
We criticize the lyrics, discuss the tune,
Making the song so technical,
Sucking it dry of any emotion.
Just sitting alone on your bed
Listening to "Florence and the Machine"
Is an effective
SorryIt doesn't matter if I've kissed anyoneSorry3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Since you've been gone.
And I haven't,
I meant it when I said I wanted
Your lips to be the last ones
Maybe I'm only missing you enough
To make my heart sink.
And I want to be held in arms
That care because I don't
Remember what it feels like.
But I do remember the feeling
Of your hand in mine as we
Fell asleep together.
And I just want you to talk to me.
I want you to smile because of
Something I said, but maybe that's
Too selfish of me.
I was always that way.
I don't know how to live,
There's really no point
When I keep dying every day.
But my lungs keep taking in
The air and I breathe.
MemoriesMemories are a funny thingMemories2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
They slowly start to fade away
But a word,
maybe an action,
or just the scenery
can trigger everything again.
After two and a half years,
the smells, the vivid images,
and the sounds finally begin
to slip quietly out of the mind.
Of course, nothing is ever that simple.
Just like a puzzle,
everything falls back into place.
Just five words trigger the past
and forces the smells, the images,
and the sounds back into a scene.
I can hear it all again.
See the darkness of the room.
The twisted face trying to be brave.
The shaking hands reaching out
It doesn't stop.
Memories never stop.
Delving further in,
there it is.
The room, white and clean.
Candy in the far corner of the room
Curtains open only to be facing
the concrete wall of the next building.
The sound of quiet chatter,
the pushing in and out of air.
Closed eyes slowly fluttering up
until only a b
Was It All A Lie?The funny thing is,Was It All A Lie?3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You can walk past me
And totally ignore me
Acting like I don't exist
Without an inch of guilt in your black heart
After all the things we have been through
After all the times we have been there for each other
And you act like it never happened
The funny thing is,
You can look in the mirror
Thinking you're the best
Thinking you are too good for everyone
After all the things I have done for you
After all the things we have put each other through
Through thick and thin
And totally forget that I was once in your life
That you needed me
That you loved me
It's like you're a totally different person,
In a totally different universe,
You don't know me anymore,
You don't want to know me anymore,
You don't love me anymore,
So please tell me this,
Did you ever love me,
Or was that just another lie you told me?
Was it all a lie?
Me.I'm Meghan.Me.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'm fifteen years old.
I'm doing the very best that I can.
I am confident in saying that I am timid,
and I am never timid about my confidence.
I question everything, and pretend to have all the answers.
I am scared.
Much of the time, I am scared.
Of being in crowds.
Sometimes of dreaming, and other times, of waking up.
In other ways, I am brave.
I can be very brave when it counts.
Usually, I don't even know it,
when I am.
Not until someone tells me
"That was very brave."
But then again, I don't know many things at all, until I'm told.
I may be young, but I've been in love.
Please don't scoff; it was real.
It was magical, and wonderful.
I felt safe with him. I knew he could never, ever hurt me.
He sang to me.
He read me whole books.
He wrote me things.
He worshipped me, though I wasn't thin, or extraordinary...
He told me I was both.
He told me I was perfect.
That he loved me.
Until he called me on our ten-month anniversary,
(I know that
You Are GoneYou smile but it's only a picture.You Are Gone2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You laugh but it's only in my memory.
You kiss me but it's only a forgotten possibility.
You hold me in waking and sleep, but it's only a dream left behind.
Do you remember the day we met?
Do you remember the jokes we used to make?
Do you remember when I cried and you kissed me?
Do you remember when I fell asleep in your arms?
Sometimes I look at your picture and I cry.
Sometimes I relive our dates in my head.
Sometimes I think of all the possibilities we had together.
Sometimes I dream that you're still here with me.
But you don't smile at me anymore.
But you and I don't talk, let alone laugh.
But you will never kiss me again.
But you will never hold me like you once did.
Abuduction.Abduction.Abuduction.2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Another convicted paedophile free to walk again.
Currently living by a primary school looking for some new prey to stalk again.
Masks himself as a confidant, someone that the children can call a friend.
Specialises in seducing and lulling its victims in to a false sense of security.
With an ulterior motive driven to defile and desecrate their innocence and purity.
How is this ungodly predator somehow able to evade all configurations of authority?
No one is capable of figuring out why this predator has these vile and vindictive thoughts.
No one can possibly understand how much torture and suffering his actions have brought.
To every family and carer that nurtured, loved, raised and taught
Their young to avoid and not to communicate with strangers.
Performing their duties as guardians, preparing and protecting them from any danger.
For them one day to be kidnapped, taken, leaving only their clothing as remainders.
After the investigations and DNA testing all the headlines will
The SameYou're like him.The Same2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Not in the way you dress though.
You're like him.
Sonnet 3This smile has not been real for quite some time,Sonnet 32 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
But this shroud of sadness has been lifted.
The breaking of one's heart should be a crime.
The reason behind my smile has shifted.
The pain a person can cause is shocking,
I used to think mine was unbearable.
Others' happiness seemed to be mocking
no previous pain was comparable
Time seemed to be my only remedy
Days, weeks, months, and years have all passed me by.
I met a friend, you, that all do envy.
That day I was healed, the day you said "hi"
I am feeling better, it must be true,
the happiness I have is thanks to you.
You Amuse MeHow do you amuse me?You Amuse Me2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Simply by being here.
For some reason,
I can't help but smile.
I can't help but enjoy myself when you're around.
I'm smiling again...
You say things that bring out my buried laughter,
You say things that patch up my scarred heart a little bit each day
How do you amuse me?
Simply being here,
And for some reason,
Laughter truly is the cure
So yes, you amuse me,
And please, please don't ever stop
Fingerpainted ExistenceI run away with my imagination...Fingerpainted Existence2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Take me by surprise
your sandpaper lips against mine.
Forgetting the fingerspaces
we'd drilled into our mind
when we were children.
Our handwriting barely legible,
making shapes on car windows
with condensation-filled breaths.
And I am blinded by your light.
So we wonder what it's like past
the double-paned glass.
Our styro-foamed-bubble-wrapped lives
melt away like better pasts
the ones we used to know.
Our tears fading into nothingness,
pooling into fingerpaint
painting our own worlds across the windshield.
You fill up the room.
Yet the paint dries, it shrivels away
with the light of each new day,
our fingers peel away the glass
the unfinished landscapes
that we had once imagined.
The flakes amassing beneath us,
towards scorching sunlight.
I have a secret I need to tell you...
Who knew that life could be so painful?
The outside world had once looked beautiful
before the whites of our eyes
it had se
Pain's Obsession (7)I wonder, do they see?Pain's Obsession (7)2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
This sadness inside of me
Does it scream out from my eyes;
Should they even be surprised?
When every time they say his name,
I feel this quiet aching pain
How could they notice the way I turn,
Shying away from the age old burn.
Trying to smile, to be happy- Whatnot,
Yet tiredly fighting the urge to be caught.
If I would scream and howl and shout,
Would they even turn about?
The memories that haunt me day and night
Are something I've given up trying to fight-
Indeed, I wish to remember his face...
And yet it's gone, it cannot be placed.
When everyone 'round me has forgotten the past,
Each time it is mentioned I try not to gasp.
I want to be free from memories' old snare
To look at the pain and find it not there.
For surely in hurting I am making a choice,
To stifle my cries, to silence my voice
In a strange tangled way this type of depression
Is making this pain a certain obsession.
The Show Must Go On.The Show Must Go On.The Show Must Go On.2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
You’re meant to be sad,
As long as the flowers last.
Well at least that’s what they say.
Then why do I still feel bad,
Even though time has passed.
I find myself thinking about you everyday.
After mourning and mourning,
On the dawning of the next morning.
Your unplanned departure will still be daunting.
How am I supposed to grasp your sudden disappearance?
When every time I close my eyes I can see your appearance.
How can I class your death as an untimely interference?
One that is destined to occur throughout my life time and time again.
These engraved names are the people I call my family, confidants and friends.
They say I should take each day as they come and try and pretend
As if you are still here amongst us, looking down from above.
As comforting as that thought is, it will never be enough.
You not being here is a reality I am forced to take.
Living a life without you was a decision I was forced to make.
Sometimes I can’t help but think that
MirrorEvery time I look in the mirror,Mirror2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I see a different me.
Sometimes I think I look decent,
Others I'm just horrendous.
I try to see the Beauty that he sees,
And sometimes I think I see her.
But then I blink,
And all I see is this horrible blob of fat.
I just want to be normal again.
To be able to look in the mirror and not be afraid of what I see staring back at me.
glass.He said, she was made of glass.glass.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Beautiful. Delicate. Fragile.
Eyes flutter to a close and she lets those whispers,
Syllables rush and wash over her,
As the built in multitude,
Echoes of waves overlapping in a glass bottle,
One on the verge of overflowing already.
Help. I'm drowning.
She remembers Mother's glass figurines,
Poised, elegant, ready to waltz into her nightmares,
"Beautiful, aren't they?"
Because they dazzled with the colors of her Mother's tears,
Glass blown from the essence of broken dreams,
Shed when she thought that the darkness of the night
Blinded others from sight.
Yes Mother, yes.
He told her, of glass snowglobes,
"You're like them," he would say,
And somehow it was no compliment
To be compared to the wonders
She spent hours gazing at on lazy afternoons.
"You store everything inside,
A universe of your own,
And you don't let anything escape.
You don't let anyone in."
How? But how?
So she remembers her sister's, Allie's, glob
Thinking of YouThey said that you weren't going to make it,Thinking of You2 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
what did I do?
I sat at the end of your bed,
thinking of you.
I put my hand near yours,
your hand cold as the floor.
Pulse that stopped blood in your veins,
I cried and yelled out your name.
The day had finally come,
the piano's melody, it hummed,
A melancholy tone that echoed in our ears,
leaving my eyes not dry, but filled with tears.
The casket lay in the ground,
you're not moving, not making a sound,
I stand before your grave, looking down at you,
What did I do?
I knelt to one knee,
thinking of you.
I left roses and violets at your grave,
remembering how you were bold and brave.
A tear ran down my face,
my heart burned like mace.
I left your grave and got in the car,
knowing that you and I will be far apart,
But we knew our love will be forever together,
even on that last day on the white stretcher.
Your ghost remains throughout the house,
staying oh so very quiet like a mouse.
Staring at me with your beautiful eyes,
knowing that I do
I Quit...I am done.I Quit...2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I've given up.
I am tired of trying,
tired of crying and
tired of people like You...
In all my miserable life,
people have kicked me,
treated me like dirt...
Only a few have gained my trust and my heart.
But then soon they too stabbed me in the back,
twisting it to the hilt, opening up old wounds...
To watch me bleed out slowly in agony,
their stained hands still holding the blade,
as my blood drips to the cold hard cracked floor...
Each time with the most wicked of smiles,
as if their joy is to torment and upset me.
To make me suffer and hurt more than the last...
Each one had known the pain I harbored,
from past failed relationships with no love.
Each promised to treat me better, to be different...
But in the end they were just as bad,
as the ones that came before them
and some times even much worse...
They used and abused me.
Kept me around as a rebound
and then tossed me away like trash...
To ignore me completely,
never to speak to me again,
EndAlthough none of them had aged a single day, deep in their code, all the characters at Litwak’s Family Center knew that they were very, very old. For the past seventy years, they had been working day after day to keep children and adults alike entertained, and for most, that was a record to be proud of.End2 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Their only collective regret was that it was all finally coming to an end, for the original Litwak’s son had decided to sell the building and recycle the last few games that were his father’s legacy.
“Tamora,” Felix said softly, his voice gentle as he tried to coax her from her sleep. For a minute, when no answer was given, when she remained quiet and still, he was tempted to allow her to sleep, to spare her the fate that they all knew was coming. This thought was quickly tossed away a moment later, for he knew well enough by now that if he tried to pull something like that, she would never forgive him.
He never would have forgiven himself if he had tried t
II who is crying.I2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I in despair.
I who is trying.
I who wants care.
I know not love.
I only know hate.
I who does push and shove.
I guess it's my fate.
I who wonders why the world is round.
I who wonders why like is not Yet found.
Dear me, dear my.
I only seem to cry.
So tell me.
I want to die.