Whole Grain Nirvana
A while ago when you were born you woke up into a world of doctored yellow lights reflecting off pale slime green puke pink tiles fuming with vapors of dried up lemon Lysol and would have shivered cold if your wrinkly hands hand had plopped down onto the floor instead of being wrapped into a blanket and weighed on a shiny metal machine mirroring artificial suns into your pupils.
Sometimes, after a shower, and it's winter now, with black mornings & blacker coffee, I really wonder if cologne covers that infant stink that I- that we- all still carry around like dandruff in hair it just keeps coming back. I take cold showers to keep my skin & hair from drying out but when I step dripping out of the shower and onto the bathroom scale there has got to be some Freudian unconscious psychoanalytic monster creeping around immobile memories in a place too dark to see. A place that gives off gut feelings instead of emotions. And that monster is tinkering back there waiting to do harm with t
Only My ImaginationI can see you, your short brown hairOnly My Imagination1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
your big brown eyes
your smile that always gives me butterflies.
I can taste you, savory on my lips
tangy in my mouth
sweet on my tongue.
I can hear you, your calm breathing next to my ear
your steady heartbeat against my chest
your soothing voice.
I can feel you, warm against my skin
cool to the touch
burning with our joint passion.
I can smell you, your cool masculine musk
your fresh clean skin hair
your strong spiced deodorant
I am LoveEverywhere I turnI am Love2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
There's another love song.
SomeoneI need someone who feels this way about meSomeone2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Someone who will love me and won't leave
The man you were two years ago
The one I fell for
Might have been that guy
But he doesn't exist anymore
I've accepted the fact that I love someone who is not coming back
It's like loving a ghost
We used to know each other better than anyone else
Now we're strangers
Maybe this is the real you
Maybe you have no idea who you are
This could be the real me
And I'm okay with that
I don't feel crazy anymore
Honestly, I'm probably better off without you
I'm still working on believing that
I still miss you everyday
And I know that you don't miss me
I need someone who will stick with me
Through all the difficult moments
Who has seen me at my worst
And still decides to stay
I need someone to save me
It Is (Depression)It is a shroud of black velvet.It Is (Depression)1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
It is the violent ocean in the dead of night.
It is the monster in the shadows; the Vashta Nerada.
It is the final crash of symbols in Carmina Burana.
It is impossible to lift.
it is impossible to breathe.
It is impossible to see.
It is the only thing that can be heard.
It is why the stars disappear at night.
It is why every light drifts by without stopping.
It is why the gnawing starts and never ceases.
It is why nothing else matters in the end.
It is my disease.
It is my disability.
It is my misfortune.
It is my death sentence.
Icarus Dreamsi am runningIcarus Dreams1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
with kites on runways;
slipping smiles into the breeze.
throwing paper airplanes
fluttering dreams in turbines.
i could've called anyone
there a liar--
but i only found me
inside my head.
and if i learned
i might not
afraid of flying
with the feeling of
between my fingers
You Are GoneYou smile but it's only a picture.You Are Gone2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You laugh but it's only in my memory.
You kiss me but it's only a forgotten possibility.
You hold me in waking and sleep, but it's only a dream left behind.
Do you remember the day we met?
Do you remember the jokes we used to make?
Do you remember when I cried and you kissed me?
Do you remember when I fell asleep in your arms?
Sometimes I look at your picture and I cry.
Sometimes I relive our dates in my head.
Sometimes I think of all the possibilities we had together.
Sometimes I dream that you're still here with me.
But you don't smile at me anymore.
But you and I don't talk, let alone laugh.
But you will never kiss me again.
But you will never hold me like you once did.
The SameYou're like him.The Same1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
Not in the way you dress though.
You're like him.
The SongbirdIt was just before he turnedThe Songbird2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
nine years old
that his mother bought the boy
a soft yellow songbird.
And that songbird
would sing the sweetest arias
and would melt away
the little boy's fears.
He loved that bird
and its beautiful melodies;
it was not a pet his mother had given him,
but a musician-
But as time wearied and withered away
(as time has tendency to do),
the boy found it harder and harder
to hear the splendid tunes
the boy could hear the bird no more.
At fifteen the boy's brain
was being ravaged by
a most monstrous cancer.
The doctors spared him his life,
but could not restore
what he had once had.
And so he was sent
to a school for the deaf and blind-
far from home and everything
he had ever known-
but he was allowed to take with him
his little songbird.
The boy was angry, though,
at Fate and God,
for he missed the bird's songs
he loved so much.
Sign language frustrated him even further,
he did not understand it
ComplicateToo often in our livesComplicate2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
We complicate things,
Cluttering our minds and hearts
With useless worries and fears.
Instead of drinking in the Summer sun
Or becoming mesmerized by your coffee,
You worry about getting sunburnt
And consuming too much caffeine.
We forget to take pleasure
In a simple hello and goodbye;
A smile shared, an "I love you",
A hug given for no reason.
We analyse every look and smile
Since each syllable means something;
Even a tiny thing such as an emoticon
Has a deeper meaning these days.
A simple "how are you" or "why"
Can be seen as offensive,
As too intrusive, as nosy,
Too demanding and suspicious.
Just talking to someone of the opposite gender
For more than a few minutes
Will have people automatically assuming
The two of you are in a relationship.
Instead of enjoying the music,
We criticize the lyrics, discuss the tune,
Making the song so technical,
Sucking it dry of any emotion.
Just sitting alone on your bed
Listening to "Florence and the Machine"
Is an effective
Pain's Obsession (7)I wonder, do they see?Pain's Obsession (7)1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
This sadness inside of me
Does it scream out from my eyes;
Should they even be surprised?
When every time they say his name,
I feel this quiet aching pain
How could they notice the way I turn,
Shying away from the age old burn.
Trying to smile, to be happy- Whatnot,
Yet tiredly fighting the urge to be caught.
If I would scream and howl and shout,
Would they even turn about?
The memories that haunt me day and night
Are something I've given up trying to fight-
Indeed, I wish to remember his face...
And yet it's gone, it cannot be placed.
When everyone 'round me has forgotten the past,
Each time it is mentioned I try not to gasp.
I want to be free from memories' old snare
To look at the pain and find it not there.
For surely in hurting I am making a choice,
To stifle my cries, to silence my voice
In a strange tangled way this type of depression
Is making this pain a certain obsession.
Don't You Know?Don't you know that you're taking her for granted?Don't You Know?2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
She's not going to be there for you for long if you're never there for her
Why don't you call her every once in a while, see if she's okay
She'll appreciate it more than you think
Show her that you truly love her, tell her she's your everything
Just prove to her that she means something to you
'Cause right now she may feel unappreciated
Right now she may feel useless
So prove to her that she's special
Prove to her that she's the only one for you
'Cause you could be slowly losing her
While you spend your time doing nothing
Meet up with her every once in a while
Before she walks away
'Cause once she walks away
She's never coming back.
MemoriesMemories are a funny thingMemories2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
They slowly start to fade away
But a word,
maybe an action,
or just the scenery
can trigger everything again.
After two and a half years,
the smells, the vivid images,
and the sounds finally begin
to slip quietly out of the mind.
Of course, nothing is ever that simple.
Just like a puzzle,
everything falls back into place.
Just five words trigger the past
and forces the smells, the images,
and the sounds back into a scene.
I can hear it all again.
See the darkness of the room.
The twisted face trying to be brave.
The shaking hands reaching out
It doesn't stop.
Memories never stop.
Delving further in,
there it is.
The room, white and clean.
Candy in the far corner of the room
Curtains open only to be facing
the concrete wall of the next building.
The sound of quiet chatter,
the pushing in and out of air.
Closed eyes slowly fluttering up
until only a b
Me.I'm Meghan.Me.1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'm fifteen years old.
I'm doing the very best that I can.
I am confident in saying that I am timid,
and I am never timid about my confidence.
I question everything, and pretend to have all the answers.
I am scared.
Much of the time, I am scared.
Of being in crowds.
Sometimes of dreaming, and other times, of waking up.
In other ways, I am brave.
I can be very brave when it counts.
Usually, I don't even know it,
when I am.
Not until someone tells me
"That was very brave."
But then again, I don't know many things at all, until I'm told.
I may be young, but I've been in love.
Please don't scoff; it was real.
It was magical, and wonderful.
I felt safe with him. I knew he could never, ever hurt me.
He sang to me.
He read me whole books.
He wrote me things.
He worshipped me, though I wasn't thin, or extraordinary...
He told me I was both.
He told me I was perfect.
That he loved me.
Until he called me on our ten-month anniversary,
(I know that
3. But I Love HimPitter patter pitter patter pitter patter 3. But I Love Him1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
And I think that's what rain is meant to sound like. I'm wrapped in a cacoon of blankets; the material is feather against my skin. It eases the pressure in my head, 4 walls closing in to my skull.
Lips on my body and I don't want to wake up. Hands in my hair and I don't know why I'm here. Skin pressed to skin and the world is not living. Fingers down my scars and I love him because I must.
I stir purposefully and mumble something about dishwashers.
"Oh, you're awake," Kyle grumbles, sitting up. I press the palm of my hand against my temple and the world's wobbling when I'm lying down with my eyes shut. I wonder what he did to me while I was sleeping and I'm disgusted and I don't care because I couldn't be any dirtier.
"How can you not feel like crap?" I groan.
"I have more experience," he says. "Now get your ass in the shower. We're going out."
"Kyle, just let me sleep. It's like 5am." I turn around to lie on my front. There will
Insane LoveDon't.Insane Love1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
Hold my hand.
Let me cry in your arms.
Talk about love and the future.
Tease me to cheer me up.
Read over my shoulder the poem I'm writing.
Speak to me.
You'll learn to hate me...
You'll learn to ignore me...
All of those things.
Save me from myself.
I'd ask you to do it.
You're not real. You're caught in my mind.
A character. A fake identity of a person I want to want me.
Thats why don't.
Because reality breaks me when you leave.
It's Okay To Be Okay Maybe it's because nobody told me it was okay, to be alone, to be just me. Maybe it's because I never stopped hurting, and I never got the chance to go numb. Maybe it's because I don't have a friend or a hand to hold out here in the middle of falling down. Maybe that is what this life is for, to sit here with my broken heart and just watch it go by. Maybe that is why I'm slowly going crazy and why my head is filled with all these pointless maybe's.It's Okay To Be Okay1 year ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
I remember when you told me, if you could have one wish it would be that when we are gone everybody who knew us would look back and say "He always made her so happy." Don't you know you aren't supposed to tell your wishes? When you tell someone your wish, it doesn't come true.
Sometimes, I want to hate you for everything you did to try help me become a better person
The Dating GameMy hands are sweating, my stomach churnsThe Dating Game1 year ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
My breathing increases in pace
The insecure feeling returns
I'm in a state that's far from grace
I really shouldn't be so nervous
But I'm running out of time
Why do we do this to ourselves?
Don't think like that, it will be fine
And now I'm standing in the middle of the room
Checking on makeup that we're brainwashed to consume
Remembering those magazines that tell you that your life's a competition
That we're all fighting for someone to fight for
You better watch your back
You're a piece of meat and the dogs want more
It's time to face the fact
That you're a piece of meat and the dogs want more
They're always hungry
They bite the hand that feeds them
So why do you still provide?
My smile is empty, my voice is sad
Although I wear this mask on my face
Trying to find what I once had
From opportunities I embrace
I really shouldn't be so upset
But I'm running out of time,
My love and trust
And now I'm standing in the mi
We AreWe areWe Are1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
How are we supposed to know?
What can we even know?
What can we know about love?
How are we supposed to know
How we feel?
How to act?
How to be?
Who says that we just know what even the
Adults do not?
We are sixteen.
How do we know love?
How can we say we are in love when
We are only teenagers?
How can we know that nothing will change when
We are so young?
How can we know that we are
Meant to be
When we have only surpassed the age of a
Do mere children
Need each other?
How are we supposed to know any of this?
We are only sixteen.
We cannot know love.
We cannot know longing.
We cannot know true feelings.
We cannot know true sorrow.
If we say we do
Are we not just another teenage couple?
Are we not just like them saying that
We love each other?
So how can we know if
We are only sixteen?
We cannot know any of this.
So stop telling me that
A Poet's WordsA poet's words are nothing but dust,A Poet's Words1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
When their words are left there to corrode and rust.
Dust is not worth a dollar, a quarter, or even a dime,
It fades away, lost in time.
Left on the table, waiting to be read,
A poet's words written, then left unsaid.
The words themselves begin to crumble there,
It loses meaning, forgotten without a care.
Death overcomes a poet's muse,
And the pen is laid down, never again to be used.
Your Heart In My HandsYou said you haveYour Heart In My Hands1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
Given me your whole heart.
I don't believe you
Even if I was 100%
Sure that what you wrote
In all those love notes
was true, I'd feel guilty.
Unlike what you said
I can't give you my heart.
At least not my whole heart.
Is it selfish that I've kept a part to protect?
If you're telling the truth
And your heart is truly in my hands
Then I look forward to our future.
I hope you understand that I have trust issues,
I will never be able to
give anyone my whole heart.
Not unless they do something incredible.
Not until we die together.
I'll die alone though.
I know I will.
I'll die unhappy.
I won't get my
Not if you're with someone else.
As long as you're happy I guess...
But don't you ever leave me.
You're in too deep.
You've said too much
and I'm close to believing you.
I think I'll always
I'll love you in a way that
Only we understand.
ChangeChange1 year ago in Concrete Poetry More Like This
Nothing is permanent
Sooner or later
Everything youre looking at at this very moment
Will have gone through a major transformation
What used to look like home to you
Might be your new prison
And where you before felt trapped
Will invite you in, with open hands and a smile
People whom used to be your worst enemy
Will end up being your best friend
The fashion will change from short to long and back to short again
You have to dye your hair black
And then blonde
And then Black again
The people whom you thought would go to the morgue with you
Will most likely have left you long ago
Your best friend is sharing his or her secrets with someone else
Your old lover
Have given his heart to someone else as well
Anything you´ve erver had
Will most likely be in the hands of another
The only constant thing in life
Together, Forever!If we were to become friends, how would it feel?Together, Forever!1 year ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Would you act good or would you act heel?
Don't stab me in the back and betray me, please,
It will not cure your heart that's begging for ease.
Friends stay by each other at all costs,
Even if you're desperate and lost,
Lost without any concern whatsoever,
You will always be mine forever.
Open up your eyes, see what's true,
Keeping your eyes closed, you won't have a clue,
That I will always be here for you, my friend,
We're partners until the tragic end.
Don't envy me; don't be jealous,
Because we're both in this, the two of us.
A future without fear, no panic,
Even through the tough times, the tragic.
My hand on your shoulder forms a bond,
A bond that will last forever, even if we're both gone,
Heaven will await us, Jesus taking our hands,
Leading us to the promised land.
We won't live in a world filled with grief,
Both of us made it here, because of our belief.
Eternally happy and without any worries,
Forever together with no enemies.
Thinking of YouThey said that you weren't going to make it,Thinking of You2 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
what did I do?
I sat at the end of your bed,
thinking of you.
I put my hand near yours,
your hand cold as the floor.
Pulse that stopped blood in your veins,
I cried and yelled out your name.
The day had finally come,
the piano's melody, it hummed,
A melancholy tone that echoed in our ears,
leaving my eyes not dry, but filled with tears.
The casket lay in the ground,
you're not moving, not making a sound,
I stand before your grave, looking down at you,
What did I do?
I knelt to one knee,
thinking of you.
I left roses and violets at your grave,
remembering how you were bold and brave.
A tear ran down my face,
my heart burned like mace.
I left your grave and got in the car,
knowing that you and I will be far apart,
But we knew our love will be forever together,
even on that last day on the white stretcher.
Your ghost remains throughout the house,
staying oh so very quiet like a mouse.
Staring at me with your beautiful eyes,
knowing that I do
The PassingThe breeze through the window taunts my skin.The Passing1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
Past the glass, a weeping willow sways in delight.
Delicate leaves dance at its feet in autumn flurry,
Playing cops and robbers with the
Peeking morning sun.
When I was small,
My sister and I found an abandoned robin's nest
Beneath that tree.
We played house; the eggs became our kin.
But they never hatched.
Mama tried to explain that these things happen sometimes
But we didn't understand.
Funny, I forgot about those speckled not-babies.
Life seems like an endless continuum
When you're that young.
Now, I remember every detail.
Now I feel myself becoming those eggs,
Wishing for a shell of my own.
What I wouldn't give to revisit those days,
To dance with the long fingers of the willow,
To chase the wild fire of the sun.
No wonder those birds never peeked out from their crest.