Karma.The truth is
I have hoarded your words.
Made haphazard stacks on on the stairs,
on the grand piano
so I would not forget as well
or as thoroughly
as you have.
For now, new beds play host to the faded pages
of a notebook, the one I used to write letters to you
that I never sent, that spent so many years under the pillows.
Washed in the laundry, the ink leaves black stains on white sheets,
determined to exist,
There are ghosts beyond the shadow of the fabric.
In that place where poetry comes from,
they're counting the threads of our histories.
They intersected, I know they did:
You read it.
I wrote it down.
Flames lick the edges of the bound volume.
than leather --
But you knew that.
It burns faster.
I suppose you knew that too.
Playing AngelYou stare up at a strong, neutral being.Playing Angel2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A being who cannot help but love without condition.
Your pure human tears run down your cheeks,
Splattering onto the cold stone floor on which you kneel.
She allows you to cling to her skirts,
Bury your face in them and sob.
She promises to take care of you.
She is only playing Angel.
Inside she breaks herself to show care in her eyes,
For those who demand it from her,
Who think she is safety.
No one could imagine she could hurt.
You think she is the strongest you have seen.
Her love is without condition.
She is forever generous.
She is only playing your Angel.
In secret, her heart lies in pieces.
Her love is little given to those who seek comfort.
Though her care isn't truly there.
Angel is all she plays for you.
The False HeroI lean back against the doorThe False Hero2 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
As I watch him take a deep breath
For a moment or two it looks like he isn't sure anymore
But soon enough he steadies his breath
I have known for a long time I'd live to see this day -
The day I send him off to war
As a child, he kept telling me about how he wanted to become a "hero", like the ones in all of those glorious stories.
But as he grew up, he found out that those kinds of "heroes" didn't really exist.
Yet, he foolishly did not give up
He still wanted to be a "hero"
Instead of being someones knight in shining armor
He settled with being some nations` puppet solider.
I couldn't help but think he was out of his mind
But looking into his eyes I saw a hardened resolve
A resolve which could only lead him down a dark road
Going to war meant protecting some people, while killing others
Whether it be right or wrong...
Then again, that to him was the definition of a "hero"
For it, he would do what needed to be done
Still, he was not doing it for any man or
Love Has ExpiredI never thought I’d see the day where it happenedLove Has Expired2 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
The world should just look away in shame
They always make it sound like love makes the world go round
But they know that it’s already expired
So why do they keep trying to look for me?
This world is filled with so many liars that it’s simply unreal
But nobody cares that most of them get into power
And people only care if they take away their rights
Or if they take away something that they either need or want
That’s what the world is always like
I’m surprised that it took this long to see the truth
That the feeling love has expired by the time you’re in your teens
You think that you know what love feels like
But only because you’re getting what you want
And most of the time all you simply want is to have sex
Unleashing you into the world that is filled with desire
I bet that a lot of fathers are worried about their daughters these days
Since rape is so popular amongst the greedy bastards out ther
I'm doneYou folded your liesI'm done2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Between your honor
You thought justness
Would buy you time
But sand always falls
On the hour
You milked worth
Out of death
But grew impatient
If only you lived
And stopped worrying
About the ending
You fumbled through
What would have been clearly seen
Had you stopped looking ahead
The Worst Bully You Can HaveThe worst bully you could have is yourself.The Worst Bully You Can Have2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You criticize every little thing you do wrong.
You judge what you wear and notice every flaw you have.
Looking in the mirror you hate how you are and what you have become.
You hate how you think and how stupid you can be.
You envy others for their looks and personality.
Looking into the mirror you can't look yourself in the eye.
What if other people can't look into their own eyes when looking in the mirror?
Have you ever taken the thought to think that person you envy, envy's you.
Do other people think their stupid and hate how they think?
Have other people looked into the mirror and hate how they are and what they have become.
What if other people notice every flaw they have and judge what they wear them self?
Have many people criticized every little thing they have done wrong.
Is the worst bully you can have yourself?
Shopping for SmilesThe smiles I send are fakeShopping for Smiles2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and I'm surprised you don't see that
see the plastic wrap still suffocating them
the price tag, the bloody barcode
the dust from sitting on the shelf too long.
My brand is cheap – though still too much –
the bare minimum
all that's needed to headline normal.
No one sees me shopping for happiness –
it's a private business
like the breaking that necessitates it.
masking the dark – that's my day
but after-hours, I search
for my brand of happiness.
I walk the aisles alone
which is how I do most things these days
and sometimes I wonder
am I the only one who has to buy this?
Am I the only one who pays
But when I arrive
to choose out my own brand of lies
the shelves are near empty
just this cheap smile
the see-through one I just sent you.
The rest are long gone,
better covers for better days
It makes me wonder –
who else is shopping?
Where do all these smiles go?
Life's TreasuresI've got a little box of treasures,Life's Treasures2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
(or little box of terrors,
depending how you choose)
and these little treasure-terrors
in my little box of horror
come from the very center
of the deepest depths of hell.
And in my little horror-box
live the cutest little demon flocks
which love to tear apart
the very center of my heart.
With a rip and a tear,
my heart's content flies everywhere
in the stormy type of thing
which most call suffering.
(But for me is called
Even IfThose smilesEven If2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
That the reason is her,
I can see them,
Even if I close my eyes.
All about her,
I can hear them,
Even if I block my ears.
Beating for her,
I can feel it,
Even if I pretend I didn't care.
That came from her,
I will wipe them,
If you'll just lean on my shoulder.
Given UpGiven UpGiven Up2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
This paper has never been whiter.
This pencil has never been sharper.
This pen has never been so functional.
This garbage bin has never been emptier.
This garbage bin is as empty as my head.
But sure, I'll still try, right?
I've tried writing.
A thousand times I've tried!
And for what?
I'm done with the dissapointment,
My hopes, trashed.
My dreams, dead.
I give up.
I can't do this anymore,
Trying to write when I clearly can't.
I can't do this.
Enoughyou used me, you knowEnough2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
took me by the heart and swung me around as if I were a rag doll
as if I couldn't feel anything
as if it didn't even matter if I did
but it hurt, my god did it hurt
it ripped at my chest and pulled at my skin
and I hurt, I hurt so bad
but at least I knew that I loved.
I knew that I loved you enough
because it broke open my insides until they were a bleeding, broken mess
and my cheeks were stained with tears and makeup
my eyes were puffy and so, so dull
and you called me beautiful
you said I looked so beautiful like this
empty and vacant and battered
so I let you do it again and again and
you called me beautiful and once again I was putty in your hands
pliant and moldable and a copy, simply a copy
there was nothing left of me as a person
I was your rag doll
your prized possession of soft skin and skeleton
sitting cross legged and beautiful on your shelf
decorated with smatters of purples and blues and yellows
you called me beautiful
and no one else would ever
Hiding WingsThe edge was just a take off pointHiding Wings2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
another starting line
as longs as he's flying
everything is fine
He knows what they all think
that he's shot right over the brink
but they don't see his hiding wings
the beautiful, soft and delicate things
and when they catch the wind
he flies straight on
You Forget.Doors close and sometimes they don't openYou Forget.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and you might be trapped in a dark room
but that doesn't mean that there isn't any light outside
It's a shame to see you go, I don't want to forget you
But everything's forgotten in the end
the feeling fades and soon you can't remember the day
or the month
or the year
much less the moment.
You forget, and that's humanity's tragic downfall.
It won't be long now, it won't be long until you're gone
but I'm begging you not to go
Please don't go, please don't leave before it's started
You're floating away and it's not fair,
nothing about this is fair
and my heart is shattering and splintering
and I can't grasp the pieces quickly enough
I can't gather them all
But maybe a piece will get stuck with you
and then you can take care of it from wherever you are
(I hope it's nice there, please let it be nice.)
so I guess that's okay
It won't be long now, it won't be long until you're gone
And I won't forget you
PathsIf a single embrace could outlast the worldPaths4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Would the two of us cling
to be sure
but lightly enough
to be pure
If a sentence made of hopeful thought-paths
Could bind two lives for good
to be sure
but lightly enough
to be pure
Could. We. Take. It?
I must admit I don't know how this works
How it moves
How it changes
How this should feel
We are young, stupid, and reckless
But (the magic word)
If the world could completely ignore us
Would we have time alone
to be sure
but just enough
to be pure
If money grew on trees and ripened quick
Would we have enough then?
to be sure
but just enough
to be pure
At the end of the day I'm trying
Do you know?His hand found hers from the other end of the sofa, teasing her fingers until it finally settled on top of her small hand. For a while, there were no words. Even the greatest of poets and the most flexible writers of prose can't say everything with their art. Sometimes it's a touch that means the world, the contact of a hug or the comforting presence of a heartbeat. He used to listen to hers, back when he thought he deserved it.Do you know?5 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
"Because it's yours, and it's there."
Her breathing became labored, indicating that she was forcing back the tears which she knew would accomplish nothing. It wasn't logical, anyway, to be sad. Everyone must part ways. Even the deepest emotions are nothing more than a farce, that's what she always told herself during those nights when her only comfort was found in tracing the lines of the ceiling tiles until she ended up back at where she had begun, anything better than watching the clock tell her time was moving without her. If the great thinkers of our
Pictures by youYour heart may be splattered onto the wallPictures by you2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
But the strokes are far to long
What kind of picture are you trying to make?
The lighting in your room is too bright
But the shadows are connected to the light
What kind of picture are you trying to show?
Many paint buckets of colours are scattered on the floor
But not a single drop had touched the door
What kind of picture are you trying to find?
There is only one face that I can see clearly
But it is only an outline apparently
What kind of picture are you trying to finish?
Create your heart out until you feel alive
I can see your eyes sparkle with ambition
Make all of those precious colours collide
Draw out your soul, make the world witness
This is your creation, it is your whole.
It's a place to retreat to
When there's no where to go
Bring a new thing onto this earth
Something that belongs to you
I can't wait to take a peek at it
Show us all the truth
Emptysunken eyes and a hollow heartEmpty2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
you're longing for something to bring you home
for something to save you and hold you and
tell you that everything's going to be okay
but nothing's okay
nothing's okay about the way your chest aches
or the way your bones are brittle and weak
because you haven't slept properly in months
and you haven't uttered a syllable for even longer
you keep pretending that it's alright
but you don't have anything to keep you sane
you're drowning in your own horror
and you know you should stop it
you know you should get up and swim,
just get the fuck up and swim,
but it's not as easy as it sounds
(because you've tried, my god how you've tried)
but nothing's going to get better
because you don't want it to get better
you're sick and twisted and cynical and
if you get better you don't know what's going to happen to your heart
everything that's making you 'you' will disappear and
there will be nothing but a dull void
a bitter emptiness that'll suck the heat right o
God's Answering MachineLost and troubled, I dialled the toll-free number 1800-I-AM-GOD, only to hear an automated message from Gods answering machine saying:God's Answering Machine6 years ago in Philosophy & Perspectives More Like This
You have reached the message box of the invisible man in the sky with magical powers. Unfortunately he is busy performing miracles and fulfilling the prayers of people he loves more than you, but if you leave your name and telephone number, he will get back to you as soon as possible.
So I left a message, and now, 10 years later, he has not called back.
11:48A small group of people in a half-sober setting11:485 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Congregating for an event, unlike a wedding,
With no visual cues to show that time has passed
But a clock on the wall to show that time has passed.
We can see
We can hear
She calls herself Invisible because she thinks she'll disappear
Into a setting where no one knows how much time has passed,
While we're regretting, that it shows: how much time has passed.
Twelve minutes of air left in a windowless room
Twelve minutes of a life beginning much too soon
Eighteen years completed in the blink of an eye
While the people who've fought for her allow themselves...
We can see.
We can hear.
Dependency on constants in a world that changes
Yeah we look above when what's below rearranges
Lean on the shoulder that's there girl, but when it's gone,
You'll have to put it behind you, somehow move on.
She can see
She can hear
He tells her that she's beautiful, because he thinks she'll disappear
Into an abyss where no one knows how much time has
The LampI threw that lamp away today. The tall, floor lamp with the faux brass finish. A dream-catcher and a cat that loves feathers just so happened to spell out its demise in a violent dissonance of shattered glass, cat yowling, and the pounding of my own heart in my ears. I just find it strange that, of all the times it's fallen in my room before and though it landed on carpet this time, the etched glass bowl chose now to break.The Lamp3 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
It made me remember that day. You know...you remember, don't you? Dad and I had slaved for days painting the walls and putting up that wallpaper mural. It wasn't until after we had finished our task that we realized none of my old bedroom things went with my new, more mature décor. I had grown out of the pastel hearts, and lacey pillows, and teddy-bears. I'd moved on to Italian vistas, and marble pillars, and rich wood. I slept that first night beneath the pink and white striped bed covers that I had used for the last twelve years of my life, silently bemoaning
Never EnoughYou told me I was kind.Never Enough2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
The kindest person you'd ever known.
You knew I was there for you if
The tears were about to flow.
If I was ever feeling broken,
You always made me happy.
Your angellic voice made my lips
Curl upwards into a smile.
You told me I was witty.
It was so easy to make you laugh.
You always giggled at my jokes,
No matter how bad they were.
Hearing your laughter,
It's ringing, shimmering tone,
Always had the power
To send tingles down my spine.
You told me I was smart.
I was always very modest.
You said you enjoyed the chance
To hold intelligent conversation.
You said you liked talking to me,
As we had similar likes and interests.
I was your best friend
And, likewise, you were mine.
You thought I was a great person...
But it's never enough, is it?
TryingDoesn't it make you sadTrying1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
How your pearl earrings that shone in the moonlight,
and that silk gown that swept the ground,
Were sold with your tears?
And how your white satin heels,
and the diamond ring you always wore,
Were traded along with your soul?
And didn't it shatter your heart to pieces
when you finally realized
you couldn’t buy happiness,
yet you were still trying
.i've written so many poems.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
about love and luck and the
unbearable sadness that surfaces
whenever i think about you.
but you isn't a person,
you is a metaphor for the
birds suffocating in the clouds and the
leaves fighting off the wind.
and when i see flowers
all i can think of is death;
because i am a poet,
and my kind of poetry is the
kind that keeps me up all night,
as i memorize the ceiling
and count every minute
until the sun rises.
it’s the kind that makes me
wish for a bridge because then
maybe i could finally be free.
my kind of poetry,
it’s the kind that kills me.
an attack that is massiveso,an attack that is massive2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
here's my hair
and my knees and legs
and even some of my shoulders
and they are dressed in purple -
don't ask me why though
an artist told me
purple was dangerous
'cause purple is red and blue
and red is fire
and blue is water
and i am red
and he is blue;
it doesn't matter now
''we'' is not me and him anymore -
here's your hair
and your lips
and your eyes, and just maybe
some of your fingertips
and you still don't have a colour
and maybe that's better
i'm a mess
and you're happiness
and you use
like ''phantasmagoria'' and ''ephemeral''
and you use
cologne that smells like heaven
red ink to write me love notes
every opportunity to see me
and you use
my name in every sentence
used to use
I'll Make My Own WayBiting my lips until they bleedI'll Make My Own Way2 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Because there's no one here to kiss them
Sat in the dark because no one needs me with them
Trapped in a cold, dark padded cell
It's meant to be a refuge but it feels like hell
I need the key but I don't even know if there is one
You said it would be easier than this
I don't deserve any of this
Please can someone take me far away from this
Before there's nothing left of me
Because it's just me now
No one else to hold me tight
I'll sing the lullabies to myself
To help me get through the night
And if someone else comes along
To take me out of this place
I'll welcome them with open arms
And a smile upon my face
But don't think for a second that I'll trust you
I've been deceived far too much
I've learnt how to read the hidden signs
Of a lying man's touch
So give me the key out of here
And I'll escape, run so far away
But I won't want anyone else with me
I'll make my own way
Dreaming of those future days
Where freedom will come find me
I'll run away even if th