queen of nothing.what I've learned:queen of nothing.3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
I still remember singing in my room when I was six, and having my mother come down the hall and slam the door so hard that the windows shook.
Her nails hurt when she scraped the tears off my face. "It doesn't matter what you want," she'd always tell me.
Like, when that drunk driver swerved and hit her car I didn't want her to leave me, and it didn't matter.
Once on vacation I bought a pair of fuzzy leather heels for two hundred dollars, and when I wore them to dinner, I found out that
1. "Suede" is a fancy word for "fuzzy leather."
And 2. Good things don't last: That night my cousin told me that she thought 135 pounds was a little too big for five foot eight. So I tore my tights up to the thigh and threw those new suede heels in the garbage.
It felt good later, to know that they couldn't hate me more than I hate myself.
My six-word story from ninth grade reads, "If I don't laugh, I'll cry."
When I read that treating people like trash to gets them to nee
The Death Within LifeRaging SeasThe Death Within Life4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
That is what life is.
No fairy godmothers
or knights in shining armor.
Only witches and cauldrons
recipes for disaster.
There are no three wishes
or steeds that fly.
No hero, no powers,
certainly no rewinds.
Life is but time
Spent by little moments
we call ours.
It is never enough,
they're left to remain.
Not even our mind, our knowledge
can prolong our hours.
To live them as they come
seconds remembered, never forgotten.
To let them pass
by our envy and our pride.
No wonder we are fools
both then and now.
Not one of us
Making us relish,
bathe in the honor
There was never a vow
of an easy way out.
Forever there will be work
never will it be clean.
Evil, never in absence
but nor will light and hope.
Perhaps all we can do
is to fight, to fall.
To live and die
AbuseGoodnight, he had said, I love you, he had said.Abuse5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Hate you hate you hate you, let me out of here, let me out! I'm so scared, please, just go away, I-
Love you too. He nodded and left-
My room, I can hear him walking a few paces away and stopping so he can see-
Me alone, changing into my pajamas and going to-
Hell, because I was a bad girl, he said I was a bad girl and I didn't deserve-
Sleep. I always sleep-
Horribly. I know he's still there, waiting for the right time, so I curl into a ball-
With an old stuffed bear because-
Mom likes to see me with it, even though the bear gives me nightmares, because-
He gave it to me. I fall-
Onto the floor. He's kicking me hard, and it hurts, it hurts, it feels like he will never leave so I can fall-
Asleep quickly and have-
Nightmares of his spawn inside of me, kicking my insides like he kicks my outsides, destroying my-
Writers"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me"Writers3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
How many times have we heard that?
What a fool that person was indeed for creating such a lie as that
Sticks and stones do break bones and words cut much deeper than a knife
Words go where no weapon can ever dream of reaching, our very soul
Words move us, inspire us, bring us down, create hate, create love.
Words can destroy just as easily as they build
Bring life as easily as it could death
Give hope and in the same second despair
Words can change the world for good or evil.
It is the job of writers to wield these weapons with care and maturity
We speak loudest with just a whisper
And quietest with just a shout
We create and nourish worlds for those who still believe in good
We open eyes and minds and hearts to the world around them
We become a beacon, and sometimes that beacon goes out
We forget what it is we do for this world and forget that we must tend to our gardens
We forget we're human and make mistakes
Behind my sleeves.This,Behind my sleeves.4 years ago in Emotional More Like This
this is for the girl
behind her sleeves
the freezing of lonely nights
the breathing of desperation
the pain of forced smiles
I love you-s.
This goes for the girl
that holds on
onto those almost - broken strings,
while she waits,
for those to break
she also waits,
for someone to
s a v e h e r
This is for every word
put into her [twisted] mind.
For every look,
up and down
of her fragile body...
This is for the everyday struggle
of finding the light
(that one that you find at the end of the tunnel)
Because she only wants
to break free,
free from her demons (there are so many)
those that tell her,
that what she sees in the mirror
is what she really is.
This is for the girl
that is tired of broken hearts
and wants to see
some broken smiles.
because everyone has its heart broken
but no one really knows
how it is, to see yourself
in that mirror, and see that
the only thing you had beautiful
My AmbitionsMy Ambitions.My Ambitions3 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
People tell me I have talent.
And my attempts at poetry are noble and valiant.
I want my words to leave a mark on this earth.
I write for myself, to give me some sort of worth.
I still think anyone is capable doing I what I do.
Paint the same or an even better image of the one I just drew.
I've been accepted by a few, but rejected by many.
This life is perpetual and the strain is getting heavy.
I write for you, as well as for me.
I write from my heart, to set my mind free.
A man who writes poetry isn't the epitome of masculinity.
I had to disregard the stereotype and over come the humility.
My writing is all I have and it's the one thing I can control.
That's why its not just words your reading, it's a piece of my soul.
I want to be liked and to appeal to everyone.
But I've learnt this ambition can never be truly done.
I write for my family, so they can be proud of their first creation.
Although I don't show it, they will always have my love and appreciation.
I'm hoping a
Can't smiles be broken too?Close your eyesCan't smiles be broken too?4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
no, open them
no, how do you see better?
it seems you're just blind...
or am I the one that made up her own reality?
(I wish I could throw you up,
just like I throw up words,
or just like I throw up my food
but you're pretty buried in my heart
and you can't purge a heart,
I always said I didn't want to forget you.
but you're leaving me no choice
and still I can't seem to let you go...
( I still don't want to)
I always loved the silence of when we lied on the grass,
because you used to fill it with your warmth
you were like your own star
but now is like I'm freezing
and I can't find the star that you used to be.
Baby you took my heart
you know it's with you
how can you forget?
that's the reason it's broken.
(leaving my heart on a basket full
of dust isn't what I really wanted)
I'm tired of hearts getting broken
can't smiles be broken too?
Dear GodDear God,Dear God4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Let me just start out by saying that
I know I don't believe in you
- I don't think I ever did.
I know church was just an obligation to me,
Filled with psalms and flickering candles.
I know I've "sinned",
And I'm sorry
- that's what you say
When you're in confession,
Right? I'm sorry?
(more than I've told the truth),
I've committed blasphemy
Godhow I've used your name in vain).
You could even say that
I'm not happy with what I have
(is this body really something to be proud of?).
But worst of all those sins,
I've committed murder.
I've killed the person
You used to know.
That innocent little girl
Who used to balance your book
In her tiny hands
And caress its weight to her chest;
Those papyrus-thin words
Rustling as they impacted
Her still developing morals.
The little girl
Who created ripples in
Your bowl of holy water
- watching as they rebounded
And slowly stilled into
Love LetterYou are re-creating the word love for meLove Letter3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I have never felt anything in my heart so deep
I'm so in love that I'll never be the same
I just want to be with you every single day
You have touched my heart in many different ways
And now from my heart you'll never go away
I feel so warm every time you're here,
I feel so cold whenever you disappear
Though it feels like you are already mine
Who knows if that's real, who know if it's a lie?
I just think about you every single time
Every time I write, and when I close my eyes
But I'm just waiting for that special day
For when you finally say, yes
Sing me lullabiesI miss the lullabySing me lullabies4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
your heart used to sing to me,
lying my head on your chest
listening to your heartbeat
as I fall asleep
was music to my ears.
And not even the louder
thunder of this rain of pain
that's where my soul
used to be for so long,
not even that could wake me up.
(I thought my soul and my heart
could actually get along
but they never seem to work things out)
Can you live with a feeling heart
and have no soul?
because I've never felt
I missed it
it's like you had always been
my missing soul.
(So I guess that's why
my soul isn't coming back
not unless you leave
but no, darling
don't ever leave
you're so much better
singing me lullabies
as I try to sleep...)
magic doesn't die.I've lived where the ghosts sleep.magic doesn't die.4 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
The streetlights are broken but they still stand,
arching over empty alleys filled only with dead cats.
Stardust is littered over the river,
drifting on the black water almost like moon beams.
You asked if I knew where I was going.
I told you, this was my home.
Once, I ate the lies of children, the dreams of dying leaves
and the stones that words have become
along with the ghosts of the town.
This torchlight might let us see the dirt on the ground,
but it will never detect their movements.
I know them.
They are quiet, almost silent.
They will never speak but they can scream.
They will scream you all the way into Sunday,
right past Wednesday and Friday,
the days they'd lost their bodies.
And watch your step.
If that board creaks, stories underneath it will haunt you.
Those stories are not fantasies. They are not pretty.
Between the cracks of moon light, I know their eyes are on us.
I know their feet are following our shadows.
I've made my bed where the
When fragile things let goHave you ever feltWhen fragile things let go4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
like a leaf in the middle of autumn?
Just falling off,
into n o t h i n g.
Like if the wind was trying to set you free
but it only got you nowhere?
I promised myself I wouldn't let you close enough to hurt me
But like everything in life,
it's just meant to be broken.
Now I feel like if I didn't feel, (does it even make sense?)
and I'd like to call myself a zombie,
but even zombies are more alive... (and they don't even exist)
You told me to hold on,
that you'd never let go
How didn't I remember that it couldn't be true?
that forever is just in fairytales,
and that I'm not in one.
Love seems so strong but it's so fragile,
it lifts you up to the sky, and when you fall...
you just break.
And the falling is even worse that when you hit the ground.
Fragile things we hold on to...
and when they let go,
we are just blown away...
And I'm just a leaf,
that is falling off
it's like if I was on the edge.
(and I feel it's all o
Within the heart of darkness.Tear tracks carve delicate patternsWithin the heart of darkness.4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Into to hollows' of my cheeks
Your beautiful face forever etched
Into the gallery of my memories
Choked cries mingle in the air
Twirling like a broken symphony
My eyes filled with fresh sorrow shine
Like the moon on a clear winter's eve
Sobs wrack my body uncontrollably
Moving it in a jerky puppet's dance
My hands desperately rake at the ground
Tearing at the Earth to try to bring you back
My heart splinters into a thousand tiny pieces
An exquisite jigsaw only you can complete
The fibres of my very being unknit
And unravel into a tangled web of colour and anguish
My soul yearns and searches for you:
A homing pigeon in the raging, rolling storms of my emotions
I lay on the floor defeated and wounded
A broken soldier bereft of a cause to fight for
Yet, in that night of madness and insanity
In which my world was turned on its head,
And my light and life had nestled so close
Then was snatched so cruelly away
The sun rose and brought with it new hope.
The tenderness that's herWith every word written, with every word spokenThe tenderness that's her3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I try my best to express myself, without it being broken
For what I feel is deep in my heart, is love that I want to be showing
Every day it develops, every day I feel more loving
Is the tenderness of passion, which I’ve never felt before
A feeling that I got from a girl who I truly adore
Beautiful as a rose and gentle as a peaceful dove
My heart gets filled with warmth, a feeling I describe as love
She’s the most beautiful girl I’ve seen, that’s as simple as I can be
So very cute and filled with joy, she’s the only girl who I want to see
Her adorable smile that always cheers me up, she’s the only one I need
She’s everything I ever wanted, I thank god that he gave her to me
done, broken heartBroken headdone, broken heart4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
day I feel
like I'm about
to fall apart
I will shatter
if I'm not
one tiny slip
Everything is gone
I don't know how
Broken at the sound
of hate in
and broken sounds
my broken fears
my broken heart
it's aching, breaking
with each crack it's wailing, saying
finally, oh finally
AlrightBroken...Alright4 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
That's her, alright.
HumanHuman!Human4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
What are the humans?
What is their purpose?
Why do they exist?
Nothing good comes from them!
Thy cause only pain and suffering.
Destroying the world!
They mock everything.
Never taking any responsibility for their actions!
Misunderstanding of everything!
Never wanting to know the truth!
Always thinking for themselves!
A pitiful way of living!
They despise one another.
They kill one another.
Trust is replaced with anger.
Love is replaced with brutality!
They live a life of a parasite!
Filling the earth with poison!
Their hearts are melting due to the anger in them.
Their brain is full of aggression towards differences.
They destroy with cruel words.
Nothing is able to stop them.
They are menace.
They don't want to understand!
They kill what they can't comprehend.
No hope shines over them!
Darkness has swallowed their existence.
Killing them is the only way.
Way of salvation!
The human is the cruelest being on the Earth!
It doesn't c
Characters playing people.We are all characters in one another's books.Characters playing people.2 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
We write them in and out as we see it…and they appear to survive beyond our plot-point. How sure are we really, that anyone else exists?…our own existence is the only sure thing, and even that seems unreal. What if we are all dreaming, and we are all just characters from someone else's imagination? What if when they wake up, we die.
What if we wake up, and it all dies?
© Rocio Belinda Mendez 2013
Leave me aloneLeave me alone3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Retreating to the isolation inside my room
curling up in a blanket of misery
Memories replay and corrupt my peaceful slumber
"You're not good enough."
"You disgust me."
"Nobody cares about you."
Tears stream down my mask
The negative thoughts have made the positive evanesce
I just want to be left
bookworm“there is no such thingbookworm2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
as reading too much.”
this is what I tell you
when you insist
that there is some danger of
becoming lost in the stuff—
mistaking seriphs for serpents,
swallowing a story so whole
that its hook
sticks in my throat.
“there is no such thing
as reading too much”
I tell you, bold-faced,
surrounded by snakes
with a line through my lip.
The same path we are onI always told youThe same path we are on4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
not to ever feel
because you knew
I would think of you
and I would
where you were.
If you only knew
that we are
under the same sun
and under the same moon
under the same
bright - burning
You'd see that
we are not so far away.
That miles are only numbers
and I refuse to let them
keep your heart away
(I am trying,
like I never did)
But miles are also wide
and I never learned
how to swim,
you were quite
I know you can
but I was never
for you to carry me with you
and save us both.
Just tell me,
which way to go
so I don't get lost...
I don't know where else to turn.
All I need is your voice
but your voice is turning into
an empty e c h o.
I know you're alone
because that's exactly
the same path
that I am on...
StarsI reached for the stars,Stars2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Longing for the strength and brilliance they held.
But my hand came back with shards of glass, streaked with blood.
Jagged pieces dug into my palm, broken fragments of a dream.
For stars are not meant to claimed or owned,
But acknowledged and gazed at from a distance.
Their world is not the same as yours,
And they do not wish to be confined and limited,
By your personal desires.