Do not.Do not tell me that you love me,Do not.3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
It's not something I want to hear.
Do not tell me that you need me,
That you want to hold me dear--
To you chest, so I can hear your heart beat,
Do not once for a moment,
Think that I am incomplete.
I'm fine, thank you, without you,
Without anyone holding me back
I don't really need you,
You're not something that I lack.
I lack a stable heart, you see,
Mine's different from the rest.
It doesn't need some silly affection,
To bring out its best.
It doesn't have a best, I'd say,
If I may be so bold,
It's cracked and charred and hollow,
It leaves you numbly cold.
Do not tell me that you love me,
I am in a paper town.
I'm empty, you can't save me,
It's best to let me drown.
Untitled.A whisper,Untitled.3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A voice, a murmur
She's afraid, confused,
She recognizes the sounds of his voice
The gentle hum carried by the wind,
The words are oh so familiar.
Is she dreaming?
It could be a nightmare
But it's impossible, it's all impossible.
The day before it happened
Sitting in the park
Everything was hazed pink, pink, pink
Everything was love.
His words, verbatum
"Forever never ends,
even when life is dead."
But it died, drowning.
I feel his whisper
Cold as the waters that took life away, away, away.
Cold as the stone of the grave.
"Forever never ends" he says,
Even though I'm dead.
separation anxiety disorderThey don't understandseparation anxiety disorder2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
How you die a thousand deaths
In my head every time we part
I scratch my skin raw while my heart threatens to burst within its ivory cage
My empty stomach churns with bile
I hope you're alright
pleasepleaseplease wake up and let me know you're alive
What's wrong with me
This isn't supposed to happen
Why can't I sleep, I hope you're okay
They don't know how much this empty seat beside me makes me worry
birdlike bonesit's like youbirdlike bones2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
wrapped your fingers
around my throat
and then had
the nerve to ask me
ice, italics. stressed.I. signed, (literally) hopeless (not very) romanticice, italics. stressed.1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
today i stood outside
for too long and came
back with numb toes and
a cold heart- i mean,
i had one from the start
and just because yours
wants to beat for mine
and i'm easily gullible
does not make me see
you, like i saw the one
and, damn, maybe it’d
just be easier on me
and you and
if i just go back to
breaking my own heart,
the cold can freeze my
heart, sure, but it
still cannot stop
(only i can do that.)
II. signed, jealousy
there is no war here,
only the midst of me
trying not to cry
because i'm already
dead and i'm aware
of it, aware i'm a
velvet-blue canary in a tiger cage
and surprisingly, i
love saying goodbye but
don't like giving u
Why is There a God?Why is there a God?Why is There a God?1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
What makes Him there?
Why is he powerful?
Why does he care?
What if God is evil,
Everything bad you see?
With all the evil here,
It's not far-fetched to me.
What if God is weak,
And just trying his best?
Every bit of evil,
Is him failing his test.
What if God is lonely,
And wishes he could talk?
Envies the humans,
That on Earth walk.
What if God is uncaring,
More important things to do?
He isn't at all worried,
What happens to you.
What if God is overwhelmed,
With everything he knows?
He tries to block it out,
Ignoring where it goes.
What if God is sleeping,
And will wake up late?
Soon he'll realize,
This effect on fate.
What if God is focused,
And can't see the world?
Too busy helping,
The praying little girl.
What if God isn't real,
And your religion is fake?
I have to wonder,
What difference it would make.
You always tell me the same storyHe's in love with a scene from the winterYou always tell me the same story2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
that occurs on a trip to Washington,
when the dark is constant and the trees jog
like legends alongside the highway;
as his eyes fall half-sleep but his senses remain
taut and vigilant, sweating on the wheel,
pitching nerve to the sound of branches cracking,
bristling under his wind-torn jacket;
the time of evening when the sunset rests
at its very highest, bright and sudden as Heaven,
an aureate glow around the birdsongs,
the stench of roadkill muted by a golden frost;
a taste of nirvana,
an instruction of faith,
the blatant existence of God,
lost as soon as he rounds the bend.
Panic AttackI don't knowPanic Attack1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
It just hurts
Kill the monsters inside of me
Don't let them grow
Please, you're my only hope
I cant help but to yell
I'm out of my damn mind
What's that smell?
Smell my skin burning, I'm in hell
Oh what to believe, what to believe
You or this self-destroying symphony
God, save me
I'm just a fucking mistake
I cant go any further
I'm drowning in a salty lake
What is it like to be sane
To be at peace, in control
to feel no pain
I try to break free but the voices pull me back
I struggle and scream
But my self-worth are their snacks
She Is HumanBlood-bathed warrior,She Is Human1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
priestess and healer,
she was the fury
the calm and pity.
Heartbeat to deafen thunder,
yet drown beneath whispers,
she swept across worlds
tripped upon the same rock
hurtled through lifetimes
never wanted to die,
scrambled for maturity
defied to grow up.
Saw all on her axis,
chose blindness to the past.
Threw shields before enemies,
opened her heart,
refused to begrudge
forgot not her pride.
You were cold insideYour lips tasted ofYou were cold inside2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
summer, of warm days and
relaxing by the
pool side and
smiling against the sun.
You should have been too hot,
too sticky, too humid.
You should have
overheated, should have
melted into your bones until
they turned to ashes, but
it never happened.
I suppose I should have
seen it coming, but
I was so moonstruck over
the way you said my name, so
in love with the idea
of love, that I
didn't notice the way
your eyes bled
The Boy With Oceans In His EyesThere was a time when she leftThe Boy With Oceans In His Eyes8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
That everyone knew you still loved her,
because upon each word
Sat a pinched note of longing.
And though the memories skewed your face
Your eyes still sparkled
When you felt her name on your tongue,
and your hands still twitched
When you thought of her fingers within yours.
There was a time-
When you realized she was never coming back,
and everyone knew you were broken,
because tears gnawed on your voice,
When your words were not screams.
And the memories contorted your features
As your eyes filled with rage,
because her name brought nothing but hurt,
and your stomach ached
In the places her hands had once roamed.
There was a time when you stopped leaving home
When everyone knew you needed us,
but no one knew how to help,
because we never heard your voice anymore,
For you were tired of screaming.
And your eyes were dull and full of a hate that we hadn't realized was there;
Your skin was a fire on the bed you never left,
and at night
ObsoleteObsoleteObsolete8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
my mind revels in antiquity,
the shadows of tomorrow.
showing shaded silhouettes
of the future,
while phantoms paint pasts.
parasol the sun.
eclipse of what was,
sprinkling flashes of dust
and what could be.
but what could've been
is nothing but a memory.
and these fading reflections
are not your grandmother's antiques.
solipsismi am the prince ofsolipsism1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
phantom pains & mediocrity -
a carbon copy, chlorinated
grey matter deity
of flickering cities &
burning mercury into my wrists
you're hurting mePlease. My bones do not bend.you're hurting me1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
Distances-her voice is quietDistances1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
as she wonders just how far
she can go with nothing but
words falling through the hole
her last bullet had made
between her lungs-
fracturesbindweed lungs spill throughfractures2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
my oak branch ribs,
up my throat and
around my thorny tongue
make their way down to
cross my clavicles,
elbows and cracked milky
they hold me tighter than you ever did
the poet's demise.Profanities exist to fillthe poet's demise.1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
the aching gap,
box devoid of pills.
I am drowning in my heartbeat.
The dam will burst,
and there the drought will meet
my empty sheaves,
the pencils stubbed and broken,
like scattered leaves,
about my pale and worthless tongue.
snapshotsIt is unfair that you livesnapshots1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
in the outskirts of every word uttered
during the heavier hours of the night,
while your gambrinous stomach cannot contain
the idea of me and all the ways I could show you
the decaying portions of promises
you made in the dark.
Don't look for me, I am only an effigy,
built from sleepless nights and the remnants of clothing
on your floor.
You made me into an inaniloquent mess;
your quiet laughter dances in the psithurism of forests,
your eyes are sink holes,
your lies are the lines on my face.
And I never realized how much easier
it's always been for you
to care less.
For The Benefit of Mr. KiteTurn your culture in for beads. Paint themFor The Benefit of Mr. Kite1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
any color you want but don't trade them.
Build another skyscraper in the marsh. Watch
rain beat the windows and the windows
sink below concern. Rub mud on your face.
Your tribes are not sustainable,
but the people are happy. The animals live
in the forest with lunatics and deer.
Their lips are always dark. Their hair
will smell like oil and incense. They
are violent, ceaseless and need business
or war. The people feel sorry for them,
and send them beads. They are happy.
They smash beer bottles with their hooves,
build great looms in the name of peace,
yet your name repeats itself in every fire
beneath the factories and apartments.
You fuck a woman and drink a little more,
hoping to rent a clean penthouse.
day twoi. fearday two8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
i talk talk talk all the time
but i never really say anything
and you can read whatever you like into that
but i know
i know that i'm afraid.
i'm afraid of the way sincerity sounds on my lips
i'm afraid that speaking my mind will result in
a dictionary definition I never asked for;
one that outlines each and every one of my flaws,
boils me down to the bare bones of insecure
i've always fallen in love like
i fall asleep; not at all often
enough, deeper than i should, and
far, far too late -
You're Never Touching AnythingCarnationsYou're Never Touching Anything2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
have grown inside my eyelids,
pollinated by june bugs
flecked with bright recording colors:
We were away
from noon till morning,
froze in amber
because the horizon twitched,
of the damp sidewalk
planted in my skin.
He sat at my left,
picking week old plastic
and throwing it
onto the sandbar
for fish to eat:
I soon planned
on Gabriel's blanket,
a circular fountain
hadn't turned on yet;
with nothing louder
than the lake
on the shore:
Our sun rose higher
and bleached my consciousness:
I wake up
with mosquito bites
and flaking wool-worn elbows,
braiding stringy petals
day onei. dear survivor,day one8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
one day you will be able to look your
beautiful soul in the mirror and
believe when you repeat the mantra;
"I am good enough. I am strong enough."
one day the scars he left on your soul
and on your body will be a distant memory,
and love will fill your waking moments.
you deserve so much more
you deserve so much more
you deserve so much more
ka nui taku aroha kia koe
( my love for you is boundless. )
ii. dear logic,
if only you knew.
if he was my star-crossed lover,
my doomed-from-the-word-go soulmate,
you are the answer that my life was
always looking for.
( if only you knew. )
iii. dear solace,
i have a confession to make:
i've been a little in love with you for years now.
i used to fall asleep