I'm sorry, I couldn't take it no moreShe's just lying there,
Wishing she was dead,
The cold whispers,
In her head,
You know no one loves you,
That no one cares,
That you'd be better off,
Not even there,
Take out the knife,
Aim at your wrist,
A deep line,
You get the gist,
As the blood flows in a red stream,
This isn't a nightmare it's just a dream,
Write your letter,
While you can,
"Lots of love From Anne",
Crumpled body lay on the floor,
I'm sorry I couldn't take it no more.
Stereotype MeYou try to make me fit into your stupid thoughtsStereotype Me4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
as one thing
I am only a thing to you
something you can fit into a category
I am a cheerleader
that must mean I'm stupid or popular
Just because I wear black clothes
and eyeliner I am goth
And every day I read books
Which makes me automatically a nerd
I don't have tons of friends to hang out with
so now I am a loner
To you I am an object
that you can place
where you see fit
I am much more than that
in every way
I am a cheerleader
and so much more than that
I am me
so just try
to stereotype me
My Own Self-DestructionThere are things about meMy Own Self-Destruction4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I just can't control
The shame makes me want
To crawl in a hole
I rely on you more
Than you'll ever know
It'd be better for you
If I were to go
I know I'm a burden
Don't bother denying
But I can't seem to shake this
No matter how hard I'm trying
The guilt causes pain
And so does the fear
The voices inside
Are all I can hear
All of these things
Make it so hard to function
I am the cause
Of my own self-destruction.
FearToo scared to moveFear4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
From the seat that I'm in
Too scared to speak,
I'm practically frozen.
Too scared to sleep
'Cause I know I'll soon wake
Too scared to stay up
I might make a mistake
Too scared to cry
Because people might see
And then they will wonder
What's the matter with me?
They'll ask me what's wrong
Prepared to give aid
But I cannot tell them
'Cause I'm too afraid.
Standing on the EdgeI'm standing on the edge looking down,Standing on the Edge3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I hate myself for doing this,
But I cannot fight no more,
I just wish to find my bliss.
I think that I will endure this,
Standing on the edge looking back at my past,
I wonder who would miss me,
And how long I would last.
I think my friends hate me,
They no longer call or text,
I wish they know how much I'll miss them,
It shouldn't be all vexed.
This is too sudden,
And I'm the one to blame,
Perhaps I should rethink this,
This is no longer a game.
Why were they so mean,
Couldn't we all just get along?
It would just be a lot easier,
If people would just admit their wrong.
But now that I'm up here,
It doesn't seem too bad,
I wonder who wouldn't miss me,
And I wonder who would be sad.
I lean forward and begin to fall,
With my life before my eyes,
I now know I'll be at peace,
And no longer have to hear their lies.
Thank You, My Dear FriendI don't think you realizeThank You, My Dear Friend5 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Or are able to even see
Just how grateful I am for you
And how much you mean to me.
I would like to take this time
To thank you for being there
Whenever I was feeling down
And needed someone who cared.
You've given me much more
Than I deserve from you
And I would like to thank you
For everything you do.
I still don't understand
Why you care so much for me
When all I do is burden you
With my depression and anxiety.
All I really know,
Is that God must have sent you
To be my friend and love me
Since I feel my friends are few.
So please don't ever leave me,
Like others have done in the past,
I really want our friendship,
To be one that will last.
You are the most amazing person
I have ever met
And I just want you to know
That I'm forever in your debt.
And if you ever need someone
To help or comfort you,
Just be sure to remember
That I'm here for you, too.
Social AnxietyI'm phobic of people,Social Anxiety3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
The world's scary to me;
I never know what's going on,
So just please leave me be.
I can't meet your eyes,
I'm far too meek.
It's only a whisper
When I try to speak.
I don't want to seem rude,
I'm really polite,
But I'm too afraid
And my throat's now too tight.
I wish I could do better
And socialize with you.
But how to do it?
I don't have a clue.
This is MY life.You scream at me, with that look in you're eye.This is MY life.7 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
You hate me, laugh when I cry.
You don't understand that you're killing me.
By trying to force me into something I don't wanna be.
You say I'mma let down, Call me a disgrace.
Cause everything you wanted, fell part in your face.
I can't be Perfect, what do you take me for?
I've had it up to here, I can't take it anymore!
You're words that you scream at me make me choke.
You act like you're life just went up in smoke.
This is my life, My choices are up to me.
I am myself, you can't tell me what to be.
I'm so pissed cause of what you do.
Give me one good reason not to kill you!
If people could see.If people could see.7 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Sometimes I wish you'd hit me,
so people can see how you are.
Sometimes I wish I had physical proof.
Not just an emotional scar.
When you call me stupid,
its like a slap in the face.
It hurts like a punch in the head,
when you call me a disgrace.
It feels like you kicked me,
when you say I'm dumb.
whenever you call me worthless
I just wish I were numb.
And it feels like you shoved me into the wall,
when you say I'm shit.
It feels like you stroke me with a belt,
when you say I'm not worth it.
It feels like you beat the shit out of me,
when you say I mean nothing at all.
It feels like you break my bones,
when you treat me like a doll.
It feels like you stabbed me,
when you said "I hate you"
After you're done screaming at me,
its like hell I've been through.
I just wish someone could understand,
I wish these bruises someone else can see.
thats why I'm asking for pain,
cause if I get beat, maybe someone will help me.
DepressionDepression3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
When I was younger I was always happy,
And very rarely sad,
But about a year ago,
Everything went from good to bad.
I now grow distant each day,
Every evening I lie in my bed,
Tear streaked cheeks,
Wishing I was dead.
It's no different at school,
I have become a freak,
I am bullied everyday,
Everything has turned bleak.
I asked for help,
And I recieved the same phrase,
It's cause your a teenager,
You'll get over it one of these days.
It got worse a few months later,
I took a breath and cut my arm,
Watched the blood drip,
Yes, I self harm.
I cry every night,
Till I eventually fall asleep,
But then morning comes,
And again I weep.
Its weak to cryIts weak to cry7 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I'll hold in these tears,
until they burn my eyes,
I'll try my hardest not to whimper,
while I choke on these cries.
Don't cry, don't cry,
its weak, its so weak.
I'll just prove to everyone I'm pathetic,
if I let these tears leak.
I feel like screaming,
I feel like crying,
I feel like bleeding,
I feel like dying,
Why am I such a fucking mess?
trying to cut everything out with this knife,
the razors are sharp but, I don't care,
maybe I just don't deserve life.
How am I supposed to go on,
when I know I'm unable to love at all?
I know I'm also unlovable,
thanks to my every flaw.
So fuck this, I'm sick of living this way,
let the tears build up, but don't cry.
Hold the gun to my head, close my eyes
and whisper goodbye...
my glass heart.my glass heart.7 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Please stop playing with my glass heart,
the way you flirt rips me apart.
I don't know if its truth or a lie,
you have the ability to make me both smile and cry.
Please don't play with my heart, you'll break it.
Please stop, I can't remake it!
You're throwing it around its gonna smash,
STOP! My heart is made of glass!
You're breaking me, you're killing me!
you break me again and again can't you see?
I cry and cry because my glass heart is shattered now,
And this is something I can't allow.
Stop playing with my glass heart, its gonna break.
Stop stealing my heart before its too late.
My heart is easy to tear,
please stop playing with my heart dear!
I think you broke it, its bleeding on the floor,
I don't know how much of this I can take anymore.
You fucking broke it! Now stop playing with my heart!
Please stop it...
You're tearing me apart.
ParanoiaWait…Paranoia3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Did they just look at me?
What did they see?
They’re talking now,
But I can’t hear what.
I’m getting that bad feeling
Deep in my gut…
They’re judging me,
I know I’m right!
I must be aware,
Keep everyone in my sight.
Who’s talking about me?
I know someone is,
But who can it be?
I can’t do anything,
For I know they’d scrutinize;
I can’t shop or eat,
So I’ll hide from their eyes.
Opposite Her SmileShe's lost.Opposite Her Smile3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
An ocean of fantasy raging with waves of twisted dreams before her eyes.
As the charcoal moon darkens the day,
The girl continues to walk through the glass shards.
Where is the line between this torment and the light?
To her left, nothing is right, and to her right, nothing is left.
What lays on the horizon that she chases after?
With a heart that's fragmented,
Her tears force it to beat with the rhythm of a clock.
Perhaps the melancholy of it all will subdue her?
Falling off a shoulder is a tattered ball gown,
Decorated in withered rose petals.
Echoes from her past make her twitch with insanity.
Trying to fix her mistakes with more,
Her inconsistent smile becomes plastic.
A self destructing happiness.
The mirror that whispers lies to her,
She is disintegrating into an onyx colored dust,
Her voice will not return any longer.
This isn't a familyThis isn't a family7 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I'm sick of all the yelling
well you all stop the fight!?
Does it mean anything at all to you
that I cry myself to sleep at night?
The yelling hurts my ears,
the fists make me bruise too.
All of this fighting is killing me!
Does that mean anything to you!?
You all make me feel weak,
and you always give me the blame.
I'm so sick of being hurt like this,
being full of shame.
I'm honestly scared,
scared that the past has repeated.
All this yelling and screaming,
makes me feel defeated.
With all these tears pouring down my cheeks,
I wonder why I'm even here.
All of the screaming and picking sides
of the people I call dear.
Will you all just shut up!?
THIS IS KILLING ME!
This is house holds a mess!
Not a family...
I'm uglyI'm ugly7 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I look in the mirror,
hate what I see.
I'm not beautiful,
I'm ugly as can be.
I hate the way my stomach looks,
I hate my face,
I hate my thighs,
I am a disgrace.
I want to cut,
My stomach until its flat.
I want to starve,
so I'm not fat.
I hate my hands,
I hate my hair,
I hate my legs,
I hate how I don't care.
Starve to death.
I will be beautiful,
even if its on my last breath.
I'm ugly, I'm ugly,
I'm worthless, I'm shit.
I look in the mirror,
I'm so ugly, I hate it.
I'm fat, I'm gross!
I'm useless, I want to die.
I stare into the mirror,
Until I want to cry.
Dig my fingers into my face,
cut my skin to the bone,
I'm so pathetic,
I should die alone.
So What Do I Do?If only I could read your mindSo What Do I Do?3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
If only I could interpret you emotions
Understand what you're going through
See through your eyes
Hear through your ears
Feel through your heart
If only I knew how to help you
But I can't
And I don't
And it's killing me
So what do I do?
I'm sorry, I'm not like the othersI'm sorry I'm not like other girls,I'm sorry, I'm not like the others3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'm sorry I don't do excersise,
I'm sorry I don't shine like pearls,
Just please leave me alone.
I know I'm stupid and weak,
What more do you want from me?
I'm suffering here, help is what i seek,
Is it so hard to get?
I like to shut myself in my room,
To escape my fears and be happy,
The outside world is full of doom,
Why can't you accept my choice?
Now I'm very ill,
It's called depression in case you care,
It makes me sick to the gill,
Knowing that my life is gone.
People say Im looking for attention,
I'm sorry if thats what you want,
If someone says that I happen to mention,
It's no attention seeking its stating the truth.
So now I end on this final note,
I'm sorry I'm not like the others,
A tear stained letter containing what I wrote,
And now I'm set to die.
KarmaIts now or never.Karma3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
There's no going back.
I have to do this now.
But do I even have the guts?
No, I should think not.
It may be too late anyhow.
But even so...
Is there any hope?
Will I be forgiven or will I be sent away?
I will always be an outcast.
I can't help who I am.
I can't help what I look like.
So what can I help?
It's gotten to the point where I don't know what to do with myself anymore.
It's like nobody understands what I'm going through.
(This is what I think every day.)
Its as if I'm trapped in a timewarp.
A timewarp where everything passes by forever.
There is no end.
Only a middle.
Where did my sanity go?
Did I have any to start with?
Will I ever be sane again?
Or will I forever be forced to strain my body and emotions to keep afloat in the midist?
It's not like I want to be here.
Yet I told myself that I would rather be anywhere than back there.
I got what I deserved.
Ain't karma a bitch?
The Girl Sat In The CornerThe girl sat in the corner, face pressed against the glass,The Girl Sat In The Corner3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Asking herself questions but always saying pass,
The concrete wall separating her emotions from others,
Never giving the chance to Struthers.
Everyone thinks she's happy and fine,
They never knew when they had crossed the line,
Face hidden under a sweep of hair,
Why was she so different from others? It wasn't fair.
She heard a noise and looked up,
Face lightened by the streaks of sunlight,
She got given a sup,
If they had seen past her wall they would have been given a fright.
The girl sat in the corner with a tear streaked face,
With no emotion and with no one caring,
She leaves places without a trace,
Because of how she is people are always staring.
People always thought she was happy,
A little bit quiet and a bit meek,
All that happiness is so sappy,
The world she lives in is like hell and very bleak.
The girl sat in the corner suddenly disappeared without a trace,
Only leaving a suicide note written in blood,
They always t
The Monster inside of MeInside my body there is a monster that you've never seen,The Monster inside of Me3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A mind full of self-loathing and hate,
A heart icy and as hard as stone,
Clinging onto my body, a dead weight,
Trapped from the real world by a screen.
I can see,
That you don't believe me,
Not many people do,
But I've got one monster full of anger and rage,
You can understand why I would need a cage.
Now that may not be true,
There's one monster that exists in me which I hate so would you,
Salty tears which stain my face,
A mourning sorrow entwining me in lace.
Hard to believe that so many monsters are inside of me,
Anger, Sorrow and Depression,
Out of reach so you can't see,
I try to find a cure its becoming on obsession,
I just wish to be in peace to just die,
But as much I want to I can't, no matter how hard I try.
Always DefeatedI just run; faster than the wind. I can't stay. I won't.Always Defeated3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
All of this hurts
To remain standing, when all I am, is torn down.
Can you hear my screams?
Or just the silence
As I take a step into the unknown, will you hold my hand? Will you ever believe in me?
I keep trying but, all those words spoken, make me want to cry; to give up and to let go of all I know.
And you know the pain never stops. It's like a never ending empty void, which is sucking me in and I wonder when this will be done.
Will I be the one who won?
Or will I be the loser everyone knows me to be?
TearsI was just thinking when suddenly my vision became blurry,Tears3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I looked down and found a little wet drop trickling down my cheek,
They always choose the wrong time and the wrong place,
It's attention that those little tears seek.
It's hard to try and hide the tears,
When surrounded by people who stop and stare,
They ask one too many questions and pry open too many wounds,
They always try and act like they really care.
They know I'm broken,
They rake through my memories causing more pain,
All due to those tiresome tears,
I do not know what they wish to gain.
The wall I used to block out my emotion and suffering was broken,
Every memory and old wound seemed to be new,
Those little tears which brings too much sympathy,
You would understand, if you knew what I've been through.
ReleasedI was chained tightly upReleased3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
In my own bitter thoughts
Of endless pain and misery
Dreams filled with death
You released me
In your arms I fall
And forget myself again
Bitter thoughts disappear
When you gently hold me
My heart will be
Yours to carry for
As it'll wither away
By the day you are gone
I never felt this real
You made me whole forevermore