hey boy, I'm bleeding without youI guess you could say I've been infatuated with death,hey boy, I'm bleeding without you2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
but I'm even more consumed by you
in the deadliest way possible.
short-term memory.and you'll never forget:short-term memory.2 years ago in Emotional More Like This
When you realized that everybody dies alone.
When you didn't take your eyeliner off one night, so in the morning
your eyes would look as hollow as you felt.
When you spent a year blacking out the sad endings in your books.
(When you wished that life could also work like that.)
When you learnt that "We need a break" means "I am going to break your heart."
When you fell in love with the stars, and the way he says "us."
When he told you, "More than just a long time."
The first time you hung up to the sound of your father laughing.
When you walked home from a party in January, and couldn't remember
if you were still breathing.
When you begged him to let you be sad, and he smiled and said, "No."
When you saw the irony of drawing trees on paper – and how alive you've felt
after being sure you were dead.
SnowLet's lose our faces tonightSnow2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Chemical anxiety and paper highs
Thrown to the curb by something stronger, small and white
While stars burn out their insides; Prometheus in the sky.
I always thought you were a lie:
Stinking pop culture curling bright around my eye
But now I wonder if your treasure is something I could find
Leaping from the bass lines into my frenzied, eager mind.
frozen/headlightsI am nervousfrozen/headlights2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
impressed to the point of
perhaps I am playing the part of
a girlchild, reincarnated from something striped
hands-shaking, violin bones (high-
perhaps it is/has been/will be
is it cliché to make comparisons to
an envelope delivered with a
white settling of
your smile tangles with the
half-poetry you breathe out instinctively, sharp and
you are surprising like
frostbite. the soft teeth of morning
freeze; and I, dull, wordless,
naive and lightning-struck
I am nervous
upsmokewhen thinking of youupsmoke2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
i like a smoke or six
drive a poisonstick
deep into my lungs
rot might reach my brain
erase our wheezing laughs
nights of nicotine haze
smog mixing with sweat
you're fumes of a cig
wispy, wonderful whirls
absorbed into corners
never to be seen again
smelling of burnt skin
i'm pulled from nostalgia
and light another match
Ghost StoryWhat is thisGhost Story2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
on the next horizon
holding strong against the wind,
it is a figment,
it is an oil stain,
it is something
less than a blur
and more than a photograph.
InkShe looked around the box she was trapped inInk2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
As she took the knife and cut open her chest
All that was left of importance to her was her broken pen
Breathing in and out, slowly
Her box was filling with ink...
It was time
She jabbed the pen in her chest
Her wishes skimmed the last of her sanity
Trying to remember when the world was bright
Instead of covered with dark
Her blood turned black
Still obbsessing with her story book dreams
Of taking her pathetic thoughts of insanity
And making her pen drip poetry
So she grabbed her notebook
Her fake reality in stazas
As the snake slithered out of her chest
Her fingers shook as she used her own darkness
Her inky soul to write her last words
For the power of the pen
Poisoned her on the inside
Made her sanity spin out racing thoughts
And pooling ink in the hidden corners of her mind
Until her breaths slowly filled with ink
Turning the coners of her mouths up
As the ink rose in her box
For her eyes cried ink when the gash was made
Shake It OffSelective collectiveShake It Off2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
- coagulating -
regret accumulating against you.
Re - living it was the easy part.
No way. There was no light.
the glow of a ghost.
- heart murmurs -
I paused to savor the expansion of blood in my arteries.
A declaration of demons
- monstrosity -
But honestly, I was just like them. I just wanted my pound of flesh.
CatalystAnd we drawCatalyst2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
In a thousand shades
Of red ink
But you, my dear,
Are color blind.
Death Plays the PianoAnd he's not bad either.Death Plays the Piano2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Arrived at the third funeral today, the sun
Was shining, the bouquets and wreaths
All in their respective vases, their dignified
Grief, yes, no one
No one really knows
Why he showed up.
Now here's the room, we'll hold the service
Here, right where there
Is enough room, there's
Plenty of room where that came from.
And the casket, open
We don't want the body
Unseen like the circumstances
That led to
He's really quite good isn't he?
Skeleton hands and everything?
Must've had a lot of practice, with
These types of things.
Death plays the piano, well
Who would have thought?
You can hear Comptine
D'un Autre Été
From the movie "Amélie"
Fall in little cascades
Down on the grass gardens
At this time of year.
Your face, my friend
Has never been so lovely.
The body? Oh, yes.
The river's at the seams
Charon, be a dear.
Here's five-and-a-half pounds
WaitingA few minutes too lateWaiting2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
a couple hours too early
But what difference does it make
when you're gone
I'm tired of waiting
The GateHe stands at the gate,The Gate2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
his smile proud and reassuring,
as he watches his baby girl
on her first day at kindergarten.
She turns around
her tiny pink lips wobbling
and her searching eyes filling up with tears,
until she finds him,
sees his reassuring face,
and then she smiles; a brave little soldier's smile
25 years later
he finds himself standing at another gate,
an airport railing,
as he watches his child
and her child
walk into their new future.
She turns around
and this time
it's his eyes that well up in tears,
his breath that hitched slightly,
and her smile
that washes over him in reassurance
This is not about you .These words are not about you.This is not about you .2 years ago in Emotional More Like This
The curves of these letters are here to imitate the shape of your spine when I have you pressed against the wall. They mock the shape of my breasts against your burning palms, the sharp prickle of your jaw resting at the base of my neck as you moan the name you could have sworn you've forgotten but it always just wiggles its way free from between your teeth.
Don't misunderstand, these words are not about you.
This is purely and solely about me and my battle between giving up and giving in. Either way, the winner turns out to be you.
I was counting crooked stars and telling you that snow feels hot to my touch when I'm high on apathy, when you caught me off-guard and set fire to my fingertips. I trusted you when you promised to leave me completely undesirous, and accidentally misheard that you can only promise to break every promise leaving your lips. For one second I believed that I have learned to keep my heart in a pocket, and then suddenly you stripped
[wonderland]she had an obsession with saturday nights,[wonderland]2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
the smell of rainy pavement, and
the sound of tired eyes --
she was crimson,
broken bird wings
and bits and pieces
of thrown-away songs
she fell down the rabbit
hole and found herself
in wonderland, sipping paper tea
with plastic people
as the world around her
spun out of
it rained tearstained roses and sleepy
whispers, crimson running
down and coating her in
a fine dusting of ash
and swan feathers
she walked through broken
glass as the silence
called to her with its
pretty little lies
but she was not Alice, and it
was not Wonderland
so she painted such a lovely little portrait
of self-destruction and said
i think i'll stay
helium balloon lungsi. You write me notes scribbled on sandpaperhelium balloon lungs2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and I run them across my face,
scraping away layers of saccharine skin,
ii. Your eyes, made of cookie crumbs,
I'd like to dip them in milk
and watch them melt,
smoking like dry ice,
iii. You churn my childish heart
in circles and in circles
till I slip into cardiac arrest,
iv. I just remembered that time you
wrapped your arms around me like vines
and held me until you couldn't,
v. Oh what I'd give for a pair of
fortune cookie lungs,
exhaling self-fulfilling prophecy,
vi. I've been fishing for horoscopes,
pasting them onto my bedroom walls
and on the backside of my skin,
hoping that they tell me that
today is the day you will be mine,
vii. But your soul is made up of sins
and I do believe in forgiveness,
but forgive me, for I cannot forget.
Cookerymy blender does not understandCookery2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
"Accept My Gift of Pineapple
Thou Foul Beast!"
this is a blood sacrifice
and she is sadly unreceptive
I begin the main course
I have cupboards full of words
quick brown foxes
I have half a mind (no, three-fourths of a mind)
to sauté them
the golden eggs
more difficult to crack
than I had thought they would be
(forge? My stove doesn't get
I will spice the adjectives with
I will verb these nouns
throw in a voodoo doll or
tulips! Two! Lips!
Crack open a maraca
and sell you some rhythm
Oh you will love this
you will devour this
You will get up and dance to this
I do not understand
andI am not quite sure what to say whenand3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
you get too close and I can
feel the words entangle in my
head and getting all clogged
up in my throat and I try to pull
them out of my mouth one by
one but they come out all wrong and
I get my tongue in a tie and my body in
a knot with yours and all these things I
try to say come out in strings and tangle
all around my ankles, and I am tripping
over my own words and falling in a
twist of phrases and sentences between
the sheets of your bed.
counting phosphenes.sometimes i imagine a couplecounting phosphenes.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
that can't agree on children.
so in the meantime they settle
to use protection
until they come to a conclusion.
he's poking holes in their condoms
while she sleeps and
she's taking precautionary birth control
when he turns his back.
i wonder if they're happy, anyway.
i had a dream.
i don't remember all of it, just tidbits.
i recall you setting our family's home aflame
and curling up with your notebooks in the fireplace
and shrugging when you realized you couldn't escape.
that time in the water
my lungs felt like they were on fire.
my skin prickled and i could tell my hairs were on end,
flowing in the liquid surrounding me.
and if i kill myself again
i hope i have the courage to do it in the nude.
CrashI throw myself atCrash2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
inhabit turtle shell
sleep for 13 hours a night
lose my ability
I take on mannerisms
that would make my former self
look like a
I know it threw you
to watch a butterfly
a caterpillar again
star turned black hole
SuffocationHer wings are broken,Suffocation2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
clipped with the broken promise:
"Tomorrow will always come."
Lies weaved themselves into the walls
and are showing through the peeling wallpaper.
Written from floor to ceiling by a monstrous hand
are tallies Counting the days
Unsaidhere's what I would say to youUnsaid3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
given the chance
you throw your smile around
like a grenade
but there is so much beauty in
you don't really want all those women
in your bed
night after night
I'd say you deserve someone better
than anyone in your past
and you won't find her this way
and I know
from the time I stumbled drunkenly
into your room and saw the Nietzsche book
and the poetry anthologies
that you are more than who these nights lately
more than some asshole
smoking out back
more than some asshole
taking advantage of another
woman with low self-esteem
more than some asshole