Red Kiss for the CasketTonight I bathe in lavender oil
And I prepare my skin to be so smooth and soft
I shall wear my most favored items
And I shall paint my lips red
So that if they have to pronounce me as deceased
At least I will look my best
And maybe there will be less work to do, when they lay me down to rest
I have never enjoyed the thought of a burial
Worms in my eye sockets
Ants in my navel
Beetles in my genitalia
And maggots in my gums, so playful
It scares me more then death itself
So perhaps I shall be lit aflame
Or cast adrift upon the open sea
But whatever it is that you decide
Please don't bury me
I never liked the dark. I never liked the cold
I would rather be chopped into tiny bits
Scattered across the globe
That way when they went looking for me
I would always be far from home
Perhaps I should specify:
I never wanted to die
But in this life of imperfection
We are all faced with a daunting task
And so when my time comes, I beg you
Please don't put me in a casket
But if tomorrow never comes
You'll Never Understand...You'll never understand...You'll Never Understand...3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
But I'm glad you don't.
Because that would mean
You'd have to go through my pain.
And I'd never wish that
Dead Woman WalkingI managed to get myself outDead Woman Walking4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
but that doesn't mean to safety.
With each step that I take,
I curse my sobriety
For I hear the silent echo
The remembrance of the stalking
but try to ignore the whispered
'Dead Woman Walking'.
My instincts tell me to run
as far and fast as I can
( hide woman hide )
But why should I do that
with no visible threat from the man?
so I lift my chin and stare straight
Ignore his laughter so mocking
That follows me jeering, saying
'You're a Dead Woman Walking'
It might be a matter of time
Or maybe just his ingenuity
It's been alluded to before
With all his taunting ambiguity
But what I saw in his eyes that day
Was no longer even shocking
Because I've become resigned
To being a 'Dead Woman Walking'
Gun Within The MirrorIt feels as if my reflectionGun Within The Mirror2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Points a gun at its own head,
As my bullet shoots the mirror
And paints the floor with red,
And it feels as if my gun
Just isn't steady in my hand,
Because darling, when I jump off cliffs,
Do you think I always land?
It feels as if the razor blade
Might be my only friend,
And it feels as if the broken glass
Might soon begin to bend,
Because my reflection is distorted, love.
Can't you see that, love, can't you see?
I'm pointing a gun at the mirror,
And the mirror points back at me.
Am I Good Enough...?Legs crossed on a cold basement floor,Am I Good Enough...?2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Blood stains painting my flesh,
The wounds deeper than ever before,
A white gown now a short black dress.
Long tangled hair clinging to my tears
Wind howling through the trees,
Moonlight painting a sky so clear,
And darling, I'm going to be set free.
My fingers scratch at the blood on my skin,
A delightful pain at the thought of a touch,
And hey, everyone who said I wasn't worth it,
Now am I good enough?
Move onBack and forthMove on4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
The thoughts in my head
From all the words you said
My hands shook
As I fought back emotion
My throat closed
My tears like an ocean
I flipped the switch
All my feelings suppressed
I tell myself
This is for the best
You walked on me
And left me in pieces
I was there for you
Yet you weren't there when I needed
I lived for you
And you took me for granted
I almost died for you
Yet all these lies you planted
Too many chances
You used them all twice
Despite how it hurts
I have to take my own advice
You're no good for me
You just hold me down
If I keep following you
I know you'll surely let me drown
I'm better off
Away from your cold grip
It feels harder to live
I'll make it
With me and me alone
My heart you no longer own
Are You?I'm sorry,Are You?3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
that I'm not
I'm not a supermodel.
that I'm not
I'm not a comedian.
that I'm not
that I'm not
that I'm not
I'm not perfect.
I am a labelI slid the blade across my wristI am a label3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Again and again.
Maybe I’m an emotional freak.
I cause fights and arguments
Maybe I’m a troublemaker.
I use make up to make myself seem
Maybe I’m girly.
I complain about things
Even when sometimes
Maybe I’m an attention seeker.
I fall under so many
So maybe I am a label.
I’m just me.
Sick of societyI may live inside my own, twisted universeSick of society3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I may change, sometimes for the worst.
What's normal to me is not normal for you.
Sometimes I just do what I need to do.
Behind a brick wall, I hoped someone would break it
I threw out my heart hoping someone would take it.
But I got tired of hiding and tired of hating
And instead of throwing myself at every guy, I'm waiting.
I'm sick of the person I tried to be
So basically, here I am, I will be me
I'm sick of the hatred, would you not agree?
.. Basically I'm sick of society.
No Longer a Little GirlDear imagination, can't you be the thing you wereNo Longer a Little Girl3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Butterflies and daffodils and happiness so pure
Sunny skies and lullabies and dreams of what could be
Hidden worlds and wonderlands of things they couldn't see
Shining gowns and silver crowns for dancing with the prince
Twirling with excitement, though the others weren't convinced
Dear intimidation, did you find it to be true
All I ever needed was an overdose of you
Silly stares and laughter slowly flood a child's mind
Making me abandon every daydream I could find
Lost beneath the shadows of the sky so dark and dead
Far too weak to turn around, yet scared of things ahead
Dear destructive tendencies, I feel it's time to hear
You were all I had when nothing else seemed to be near
Everything so out of reach, too far for me to see
I decided I would choose the needle next to me
Slicing through my very skin to feel something once more
Weeping through the satisfaction I could not ignore
Dear imagination, can't you be the thing you were?
If you are a victim...If you have ever faked a smileIf you are a victim...3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Slit your wrist
Cried yourself to sleep
Wished yourself gone
Chased a dream (and lost it)
Ended up in a nightmare…
Turned away from your “friends”
Tortured yourself over an error
If you are a victim…
Remember to stay strong.
Because you’re only a survivor
That Gay Boy Sitting Next To YouLook at the gay boy sitting next to you,That Gay Boy Sitting Next To You2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
the one who you kick, physically torture and verbally abuse.
Look at his eyes that were once vibrant with life,
and keep in mind that you and your friend's were the one who stole his light.
You called him a sin and condemned him to hell,
every day he walked through the school doors, he was greeted with your intolerant yells.
With your injustice , you treated him as terribly as you pleased,
and when you were through with your torment, you treated him like some sort of disease.
Was religion your actual excuse to act like an ass,
or was there something that you refused to see past?
Because that gay boy who sits next you daily in class,
is the one who knows your present, future and past.
He knows where bullies come from, so don't hide fully behind Christianity.
Because when you go home, you yourself are showered with profanities.
The same fist you used to beat the blue eyed boy,
is the same fist that your father uses to wring around your neck