.Reminisce.Remember when we'd sit up against the wall?
Share a laugh, make it up as we went along
And how we were so happy, when it was just two
And how my heart is twisting at the thought of you
Remember swinging high and flipping when you reached the top?
And how thousands of miles couldn't tell our hearts to stop?
And now the mist of rain only speaks your name, no matter what I do
Why can't my heart stop twisting at the thought of you?
Remember our first exchange of words that meant the world?
The tug-of-war that we played as lonely fingers curled
And with the summer waning, I don't know what to do
All I feel's my heart twisting at the thought of you.
Remember our last goodbye, a hug cut short by time?
And how it finally hit me that it might be fine
Though love is never-ending, and hearts can go on, too
My heart is always twisting at the thought of you.
.Boy.She's seated in the very back.Boy.4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Her face composed, her smile a crack
Her pencil moves across the page
Express her own inner rage.
She writes a tale of sorrow sweet
A girl who walks with inward feet
She keeps tears from leaking down
As her lips form a small frown.
The girl that she tells of with words
Loves the sun and sound of birds
But there's twist that ruins the joy
The girl she tells of, is a boy.
A boy who feels so very sad
A boy too lonely to be mad
A boy trapped in a crowded shell
A boy told that he's destined for hell.
She has to take a little break
To stop that familiar ache
That resides inside her heart
Of which is being torn apart.
Soon she's back to tell her tale
Of the girl who's really male
On her face is a sad grin
As she writes of the boy's win.
A boy that looks alive in greyI want to be the kind of guy that can wear a white tee, black jeans,A boy that looks alive in grey4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and still look alive in greyscale photos.
I want to have the kind of look that burns a hole through your monochromasia,
the guy that doesn't mind getting soaked by the rain.
I want to be the kind of guy that can run forwards holding a flag that screams, "justice for all!" and smile.
I want to be the kind of guy that someone would love
to be loved by.
That kind of honest, eccentric guy-
who doesn't care that his chromosomes are XX,
because he knows who he is,
and has made himself the man he wanted to be.
Failed RebellionBorn to a body you'll never loveFailed Rebellion4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
As imperfections often taint it
A rebel of nature, a rebel of gender
Your first glance at the world's cruelty.
You clench your fist in hesitation
Cringing every time you hear the words
You bite your tongue in rushing fear
Oh how you want to correct them.
Your heart receives a painful lash
As you hear that dreadful title
You have no choice but to respond in weakness
As you make your presence known.
Tears threaten to pour over
As you are reminded of your faults
"But you're a girl", they say
"Boys don't cry", they argue.
You want to scream and shout
You want to claw off your outsides
But when the sun rises once more
You sigh in great defeat.
I will never know, but I wouldTRANSMENI will never know, but I would4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I will never know how painful it is to get caught in my zipper. I would take the chance, if it meant I had a penis and I could pee standing up
I will never know how embarrassing it is to get an erection in public. I would happily hide my visible arousal, if it meant I could get an erection.
I will never know the disgust of having to go to the doctor for a prostate exam. I would go and get an exam every week, if it meant I had a prostate.
I will never know the agony of being kicked in the balls. I wouldn't curse or scream about it, if it meant I had balls that could be injured.
I will never need to use a condom for the reason "I don't want my partner to get pregnant". I'd never gripe about having to use a condom, if it meant I had the ability to get someone pregnant.
I will never know the moodiness, bloating, and cramps of having PMS. I would not complain and I would try to deal with the agony, if it meant I got a period.
I will never know the dread of going to a g
.Stay.Hope has dwindled down to a speck.Stay.3 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Forcing another reality check
Chance after chance has surely been blown
It's finally just me out on my own.
Memories dance to a tune in my head
Smiles that once were haunting have fled
The longing has never quite grown so strong
As when I realized that I have been wrong.
Broken by insecurities great
Wondering if it could be fate
Only time could ever lead the way
And I'll stumble behind, hoping you stay.
. Scar Tissue .Scar tissue burns at the thought of you. Scar Tissue .4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
With your gentle touches and musical laugh
With those memories of evergreen trees and fishbowl locks
I can't help but feel a longing erupt in my heart.
What once was a prophecy finally fulfilled
Turned sour with distance brought on by dragons and divas
With tears and slices created by the hole that has yet to be filled.
What we had thought was true and final
What future had been crushed by flushing cheeks to another
What would never be forgotten at the mention of chemical romances
What leaves every speeding heart beat to another feeling sore and bittersweet.
I wonder which path there is to take
When nostalgia peeks through the door and looks me dead in the eyes, asking
"How could you forget her? How could you forget?"
And my only response is a head hung low
Wondering if I would be worthy of another when I had committed such a crime.
For it was you who had first stolen my heart
For it was you who kept my heart
Either WayToday I'll be your RomeoEither Way4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
If you'll be my Juliet
Because I feel protective of you
Like a mother is of her daughter
And I want to hold you in my arms
Keep you safe
Because when you're safe, so am I
So today I'll be your Romeo
If you'll be my Juliet
Even if I'm no Romeo
And never will be
Today I'll be your Juliet
If you'll be my Romeo
I want to feel protected
Like you're the bear and I'm the cub
I want to feel the warmth of your embrace
Because your touch makes me feel like I belong
So today I'll be your Juliet
If you'll be my Romeo
Even if you're technically Juliet
And me, too
Today I'll be your lover
If you'll be mine, as well
Let's keep each other safe
Like two comrades in war
Let's hold each other tight
And never let go
Because when we're together
I finally belong
I am finally safe
So today I'll be your lover
And the days after
And even if this country's a war zone
For people like us
Let's stick together
Because wars aren't fought alone
And life isn't meant to b
Prision with Hangers.Step out of one closet,Prision with Hangers.4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
And be forced into another,
Ask for help,
From people that don't understand,
Happiness just isn't for you.
It's not part of the plan.
Cry alone in your room,
And force yourself to sleep.
Because in your dreams,
At least you can be you.
You'll wake up the next day,
And find reality again.
You're not a boy,
But you can't be a girl.
It's not fair, no,
But there isn't anything you can do,
Except sit alone in the dark,
And hope that maybe, just maybe,
You won't wake up.
Reasons to date a transmanReasons you should date a transmanReasons to date a transman4 years ago in Editorial More Like This
-No premature ejaculation. We really can go all night!
-No erectile dysfunction.
-We come in a variety of sizes, colors, and textures. (Partial pun!)
-For the ladies, no worries of accidental pregnancies, so no need for birth control that messes with your hormones, mind, and body. (Serious note: This does not include STD protection. Use your brain.)
-T or not, we tend to look younger than our real age. We can be your first husband and your trophy husband rolled into one.
-For the ladies, we tend to have better listening skills, more comprehension of your situation, and more respect for your equality than your last boyfriend. (Pfft. He was a jerk.)
-For women, we have a better chance of remembering to put the lid down.
-For men, we have a better chance of the toilet lid staying up.
-We'll probably remember your birthday.
-For women, you don't have to tell us the right spots. We know the right spots.
-Men or women, you probably won't miss what's not the
Confessions: HesitationFor what was once hope has been clouded with worryConfessions: Hesitation4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Fogged up by hesitation and insecurity
Unsureness rages on with paranoia to boot
With no net to catch the latest screw up.
To one side is the resident pessimist hovering with doubt
With millions of "What-if's" and thousands of "I should have's"
All clumped together to form a mixing pot of anxious fidgeting
Accompanied by the reminder that all good things must come to an end.
Though to the other side would be the spark of faith
Whispering sweet words of motivation; of sureness that all will settle
Which is the drive to keep a chin up and let nature take its course
No matter what obstacles will have to be dodged and trampled.
Despite the comfort, the darkening mist continues to drown out the light
Chilling all warmth with memories and past scars that continue to haunt so stubbornly
The constant fear of perfection for another continues to force itself into
Is that too much to ask?There was a new boy at school.Is that too much to ask?4 years ago in Emotional More Like This
He sat in the back, all alone.
The teacher was doing roll call.
The boy froze.
"..Jessica? Is she here today?"
The boy raised his hand shakily and muttered quietly, almost scared.
What sort of name was that for a boy?
She must be a girl, then.
At lunch she was alone, crying.
Why was she crying?
Because everything felt so wrong.
Her name didn't fit her.
Her body didn't fit her.
She was a boy on the inside.
Why was she a girl on the outside?
She truly thought it was to torture her.
So she scarred the body she hated, as if it would do any good
A boy that sat next to her in class saw the scars.
The thin lines previously seeping with blood along her wrists and legs.
And yet he said nothing.
She binded, she changed her name,
Normal"This isn't normal, is it?" I asked.Normal4 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
He looked up.
"Normal people don't have to do this, do they?" I asked. "Normal people don't get thrown out of places because they exist. Do they?"
He sighed. His eyes were tired. "No, baby."
"They don't have trouble finding somewhere to live. They don't worry about losing their jobs. They don't lose their parents." I said, trying to make them sound like statements, not questions. "Not because they exist."
He shook his head.
I nodded. "I'd forgotten. It's been so long since I was normal, I'd forgotten."
He looked at me for a moment, then stood and held me until the shock passed.
I would rather..."I would rather die in the streets a happy man than live a life of lies as a miserable woman." -FreedomFlareonI would rather...4 years ago in Emotional More Like This
.Smile.Tears not of blue but of blinding smiles.Smile.4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Followed by trails that go on for miles
Born years ago and from that day
I've finally learned to smile today.
Through forests of lies and mountains of molehills
Dreams that once lived and thousands of red pills
I've found a safe place to dub the name 'home'
Where happiness lives and hopes will now roam.
Lest I forget that love does exist
That happiness comes to those who persist
I'll paint the town red with faith and with trust
In hopes that my spirits won't be turned to dust.