i only want to be close to you
in the way that two branches are
passing the days ,
complete and soothed next to each other.
that is the fear
that comes from losing you.
that is the fear
of forgetting what light is like
when you close your eyes .
this is my little preview of what's inside of my unlivable universe .
"tumblriversal" - tumblr's page
"the electricity of the first slip into
the coat of a new lover-
the smell ,the heaviness,
the metaphors that " am wearing part of him"
i think of how many boxes i would have
to tug to you if ever your things couldn't feel
like mine anymore .
you keep me warm even when you are not here.
i have filled the pockets with my own things,
they have pick up my scent
they have memories of me . "
" I Have Never Felt Such Frustration
Or Lack Of Self Control
And Go Crazy Like You've Made Me
I Want You To Scrape Me From The Walls
One Who Doesn't Care Is One Who Shouldn't Be
I've Tried To Hide Myself From What Is
Wrong For Me, For Me "
" you can live in this illusion you can choose to believe
but what if everything around you isn't quite as it seems
what if all the world you used to know is an elaborate dream?
in this place it seems like such a shame
though it all looks different now,
I know its still the same
this thing is slowly taking me apart
grey would be the color if I had a heart
you always were the one to show me how
back then I couldn't do the things that I can do now
everywhere I look you're all I see
just a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be "
" And you can tell the world
That you're tired
you can tell the world
That you're leaving
you can pack your bags
And spread your wings
And you can tell them all
That it's over
But while you wave goodbye
I'll be getting closer "
I won't let you come to nothing
“Remember everything that you said,
How we can never fully trust them
Wish I could say I disagree but
I know they’re the ones to blame
Destroyed every hope we once had
Nothing we can do now that you’re gone,
No way to bring you back
Took us all by surprise No,
We never saw this coming
Always were, always will be our hero
With no warning sign
One day they came and took you away
Things can be so unfair
You were taken away before your time
Now we’re all sitting here,
Nothing left for us to say
Don’t want to leave you behind "
. actually i want .
I hope you don't listen to me
I don't always say what I'm thinking
And sometimes I'll tell you,
What I think you want to hear
Most times I just talk to make a sound
" I could follow you to the beginning
Just to relive the start
Maybe then we'd remember to slow down
At all of our favorite parts "
"... i think while she was leaving the church,she may found G.O.D.
and crying she throw herself in his arms,confused ,
asking him why they are asking her to leave,to be on the outside ,
just because of a signed paper,with no matter in the spiritual plane.
And G.O.D. in his Obscure Omnipresence looking at her, possibly ,
would had answered :
- see ... my son ... i am on the outside too.It's been a long time since they don't let me in ..."
this sentence was taken in a book about witches .
It's about because she was divorced , she couldn't be part of some ceremony that i can't remember right now .
somehow , we always find a way to disbelieve .
losing faith is easy , find it is the hard part .
and i am talking about people here . all the lost friendships .
... the loved ones ... the soul mates and even ourselves . losing faith in o u r s e l v e s . "
Goodbye my almost lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be'
Well i'd never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me
So you're gone and i'm haunted
I get tired of the pleasure
My company's so cheap
Baby, take me from this tempest
Take me someplace so I can sleep
Pretty faces grab the headlines
You leave me nothing but my name
And all the grief keeps multiplying
And I pretend to feel no pain
Never gonna lose, baby If I tell the truth
Would I be uncool If I could
I just wanna believe You tried to hold me
Now i feel so lost
" someone i loved once gave me a box full of darkness .
i took me years to understand that, this too, was a gift ."
- Mary Oliver . (Thirst)
I was once given a box full of darkness. Someone I loved gave it to me, too. The darkness was actually disillusionment, disappointment, and despair. The box was full of meanness, lies, and deceit.
The first thing I did with this box was glorify it. I gave it pride of place in my emotional world. I let it consume my thoughts, my heart, and my mind. Every so often, when I was feeling at my most vulnerable, I opened it up and peered into the darkness, where I would wail and cry in despair, pitying myself for being dealt such a dark and horrible blow.
Time passed, and I found myself opening the dark box less often. Sometimes, I was just too busy with other things to spend the time I knew the darkness required. Other times, I simply didn’t have the energy to deal with all those dark emotions. Eventually, I was just bored with the dark box and it’s perpetual whining.
Then came the day that my thoughts drifted toward the darkness, and I realized the dark box was no longer there. For a few frenzied moments, my mind searched for it, but I simply could not conjure it up. A deep sigh of relief welled within me, and I knew the darkness was gone for good. In it’s place was a very quiet sense of understanding. peace, and forgiveness, a sensation that I had never before known, but one I wanted very much to store up and treasure.
At one time or another, life will hand each one of us a box full of darkness. It’s important to keep that box around for a while – but not for too long. Buried deep inside this box is a wealth of insight, compassion, and self-awareness. When you dig deeply enough to reach this layer, you’ve found the real buried treasure – the true gift that’s hidden in the darkness.
I think you could fall in love with anyone if you saw the parts of them no one else gets to see.
Like if you followed them around invisibly for a day and saw them crying in their bed at night or singing in the shower
or humming quietly to themselves as they make a sandwich or even just walking along the street.
And even if they were really weird and had no friends at school, I think, after seeing them at their most vulnerable,
you wouldn’t be able to help falling in love with them.
unbelievable beautiful song .
cause no one love you like i love you .