First Time Out
"Alenko! Wrex! Suit up and report to the Mako." Joker's voice is loud through the bay speakers. Of course I'm already suited up - no krogan would be caught without his armor. Across the bay I see the turian heave a sigh of relief. Then he looks at me and his left mandible twitches in a smirk. He's been whining like a baby after every trip planetside:
"I never knew Shepard hated us that much."
"I thought I was going to die!"
"Thank the Spirits for my helmet it muffles the screams."
"I'm thinking about letting my shooting take a nosedive. Maybe then she'll leave me back on the Normandy."
I actually hear him chuckling as we load into the Mako. Even Alenko doesn't gripe that much and he's a human. He is using the full harness rig, though, and I see him triple checking the buckles. He even straps on his helmet with the visor sealed. I see Shepard roll her eyes at him. "The atmosphere is earth normal, Kaidan," she mutters. He responds with a nod and a brief "ma'am" an
GriefGrief2 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Kaidan hates his sleep shift. He takes all the extra hours he can aboard the new Alliance frigate to avoid the sleeper pods. Keeping busy doesn't help the numbness, it doesn't help him adjust to a ship that isn't the Normandy, but it's still better than the alternative.
When he closes his eyes... when he's alone in the dark... panic sets in. It's like the darkness sucks all the oxygen out of the pod and he knows this is how she must have felt in those last few minutes - alone and cold, suffocating in space. He remembers the Normandy evacuation checking the survivors against the crew roster as soon as he touched down. He knew she'd want that information the second she landed. He remembers Joker, white faced and shaking as he climbed out of the escape pod alone. He'd known as soon as he saw his face. Even for her helmsman, losing the Normandy wasn't as painful as knowing that Shepard was gone. Gone trying to save his stubborn ass.
He can't forgive Joker. He can't forgive himself.