I wanted to tell youThere's a heady exhilaration blooming in my chest and a broad, triumphant smile on my lips and I know I look almost too happy, but I can't control my beaming, and I am absolutely bursting to tell you the news:I wanted to tell you3 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
That my essay was perfect, that I nailed the presentation, that the biochem final was a walk in the park.
And, oh, God, I want to tell you so many things and that I love you and that I want you and I want to feel your arms around me, just barely containing my wild excitement. I want to laugh with relief and feel your lips curve up in a smile against the skin of my neck.
And I love you,
I love you,
I love you.
It's these moments when I am absolutely on top of the world that I want to share with you. I want you to laugh and tease me and call me a nerdy little bookworm and your baby girl and then kiss me all over so that I am pulled in a thousand directions at once. I want to absolutely unwind in your arms, but you hold me so tightly that I'm never afraid
Pockmarked CollarbonesSoft,Pockmarked Collarbones3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
across swan-dive necks
and pockmarked collarbones
bearing the weight
of the clouds.
French vanilla lip gloss
and glitter snowflakes
flecking from my lotion-smooth skin
to your stop sign sunburns.
splayed like ivy vines
across fishnet tights
and trembling thighs,
of caught-in-the-moment feelings
tumbling into buzzing ears,
the raging inferno
of your last name replacing mine
the shrill sirens
that might have saved us.
Like fallen sparrows,
and beaks still emitting silent shrieks,
we broke across the concrete,
running like yolk
from a dozen different places,
a striking white
under the tornado-gray sky.
A better natural disaster than love
in the heat of July,
and I think I'll name it after you
and your pits-of-midnight eyes
with my last gasping breath.
Hummingbird WingsI have a secret:Hummingbird Wings2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'm on to you.
The weight of your voice
reminds me of hummingbird wings
and I can't stand
the way you twirl your hair.
It's not a ribbon
or a shoelace
or an earring;
and look at me!
The purse of your lips
when you're angry
makes me think
of my grandmother's disapproval,
and I detest
the way you hold yourself
like you know something
the rest of us don't.
Like you know the destiny
you're being led to
and you're just waiting
for it to make the first move.
I might have known her, once.On Tuesday,I might have known her, once.3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I stood with my arms folded over my chest
trailing cold and lonely fingers
down my spine
icy water lapping hungrily at
and I watched them pull the body
from the lake.
She'd been there a while,
weighed down by crooked smiles and ten pounds of cover-up,
but I still caught traces
of track-mark bruises down her arms
and her tattoo-permanent eyeliner
was a streak of black
on her gray skin.
Her lips were stained
and her skin was mottled,
ripped away at the edges
and the rocking melody of the waves.
If she still had eyes,
I remember thinking,
they'd be slit down the middle
and glaring at me
for forgetting everything I once knew about her.
Except for her name
and the ways she'd always tilted her head when she laughed,
the obituary in this morning's paper
gave nothing away.
MoonblinkedWhile the Earth dreams,Moonblinked2 years ago in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
silence devours a
moody crescent moon.
I'll Shove Youthe morning will comeI'll Shove You3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
the sun will rise
life will go on
just as i will breathe
and you will cease to
(until you decide to wake up to
the fact that nothing is easy
and that's not how
great men are made: you must be opposed
if you are to succeed at anything)
Calling softly for death.Midnight's soft feathersCalling softly for death.3 years ago in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
ruffled by a breeze. Death's birds ,
silent , watch him work.
TrueI lost everything I was, true.True3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
But all I was
I was for you.
I wish you knew
How I still cry
To think of you
His Dishwasher HandsI met a boy,His Dishwasher Hands3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
who captivated me.
was always slicked like silk
into a band
at the nape of his neck.
He wore black
and walked with a swagger,
the hem of his trench-coat
reaching past his knees.
He reminded me
of the vampire Lestat
and he had a habit
when I caught him off guard.
He was a musician
in the making,
or a poet
or a surgeon-to-be,
but you'd never tell
because he had a dishwasher's rough hands.
And maybe I didn't know him well,
but I know he had cornflower blue eyes
the likes of which you could swim in
and his green work shirt
was always molded to his stick-figure skin.
I met a boy,
and the tilt of his head
and the opaque hue of his skin
And I let him go.
Butterfly DreamsButterfly wings don't mixButterfly Dreams2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
with stomach acid
and bad memories,
angry words boiling holes
through vulnerable hearts...
let me try again.
There are no exclamation points
at the end of this sentence
and there might not be anything
but chemistry between us,
but butterfly wings
aren't razor blades
and I'm going to trust
that you'll pad my heart
before you let it fall.
Skipping StonesHe told me he feltSkipping Stones2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
like he was wasting time
running in circles
looking for love
when he should have been
waking up to it each day.
I listened to his Sneakers
and watched him walk away,
that he'd been waking up to me
for five years.
I'm still not sure,
if I should have
chased after him...
or if the fact
that my heart didn't break
once he disappeared
around the corner up the road
was all the answer
I'd ever needed.
CacklesSunset on black silhouette mountains,Cackles2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
a breeze bending tall corn stalks as if the world
didn't screech to a halt three hours ago.
I remember the weight of your claws
and the onyx of your gaze, Cackles.
You used to laugh at the plaid of my shirt,
the straw sticking from my sleeves,
the sightless look to my button eyes.
Hell, you used to laugh at everything.
I loved that about you, you know?
I loved you, Cackles,
but I hated how you played chicken
in the middle of the road.
I told you so, once...
but you laughed at me for it
and I started to hate
the dip of your head into roadkill,
the clasp of your nails around your food,
the sheen of black feathers in August's breeze.
I warned you about Farmer Ted's son
and his love of squishing things
beneath the rubber of his tires...
and you laughed at that, too.
Maybe fate decided
you'd pressed your luck
for too long.
Maybe I was never meant to be anything
but the stuffed doll
you were never afraid to sit on and leave...
but I miss your laug
Learning to Stand--FFM3The wind is cold on her bare arms, the hem of her Evanescence tee rumpled against her back. Thin streams of sunlight beat against the top of her head and the nape of her neck. The forest is quiet today, a subtle lullaby of turtledoves and crickets wafting into their ears.Learning to Stand--FFM33 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
"We used to be friends. You know. Back when she only studied birds." Rya sighs, twisting an errant strand of hair between her fingers. She knows she's whining. She doesn't care. Wrapping an arm around Sidney's thin waist, Rya leans her head on the other girl's shoulder and bites back tears.
"So what happened?" Sidney's looking at her, her large green eyes filled with concern. It's the first time anyone's asked Rya that question.
"She did?" Sidney chuckles, a soft, throaty sound, and Rya understands. Clicking her tongue, she tries again.
Untitledspattering notebook paper withUntitled3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
bloody coughed-up words isn't
my idea of showing a girl a
good time. the tighter the
numbness curls around my
brainstem, the more i wish i was
born with a whole cerebellum: it's
hard to give up what you never had.
DelicateIt could have been a love story,Delicate3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and it was
but it isn't.
israeli want to know people who know godisrael3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
but our instruments assure his exit-
quiet, loud, inevitable.
a roar in the streets, explosion, signs
or the satellite lying quietly across the ocean
the strange sky making martyrs of mute ships.
if we're meant a return, I believe,
there will come fog and we press ourselves
through voices like old forests until we're together.
but the spirit? what do we know about weightlessness
in a dimension polluted with gravity?
a beleaguered preacher says 'have you ever loved us'
and the audience erupts.
when god doesn't answer i look for you
in a liquor store that burned down last year
Conversations with MirrorsI found him in the libraryConversations with Mirrors2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
with Emily Dickinson
in one hand
and Sylvia Plath
in the other.
He told me
he was searching for answers;
that the path
he'd been following all his life
suddenly seemed made up
to take a book from his grasp,
I murmured something
and being haunted by the trace
of all the things we'll never be.
When I looked back up,
I was talking
to my mirror
in bathrobe and hair curlers,
from my shower
it doesn't make much sense now,
but every book of poetry I own
is littering my bedroom floor
with the pages ripped out.
Love, a Funny Four Letter WordhavocLove, a Funny Four Letter Word3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
is a funny word.
you and me
are two funny beings
dying in their own funny ways with
funny liquids seeping from their wounds
[i know mine is a combination of
vodka and olive oil and sanguine
tears, i don't know about yours]
and other funny things on their
like funny stories. you know i
always loved your funny stories.
like the one where you were
talking about your mom and i being
your slaves and we started laughing and
i said "hahahahaha fuck you."
you laughed your hardest
but that was you in the time
that was 'then', and i'm afraid that
this is 'now' and i can't seem to get
over how we seemingly skipped the
in between. the in between where you
were supposed to hold me close and
really savor the blood in your mouth.
my blood. god, did you ever? because
i'm drowning in the taste of yours as
or rather, as we don't.
Harmonica DreamsOutside a subway on 75th,Harmonica Dreams2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
he plays a harmonica without breathing,
hoping just one person
will hear his heart breaking.
Let them forget
that their secret lover is waiting
on a bed in a foreign hotel;
that this late meeting
with their boned-up,
might get them a raise;
that the flowers in the park down the street
and that they can't breathe
with the grime,
the past they wish they'd lived differently.
Speed Limit Wasn't In His Vocabularytoo often i would look over andSpeed Limit Wasn't In His Vocabulary3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
see he was going too fast and i would say
so and in this way i kept him safe
(and he kept me risky) and we lived like this
until i couldn't take his inner child
until he couldn't take my inner middle-aged woman
any longer and i tore his lungs apart
but he tore mine first
we were always too good at
knowing each other too well
Morning, Mourning Gloryfragile: i think i am, but i'm disappointingly notMorning, Mourning Glory2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
truth is that the truth isn't
everything we carved it out to be, making grooves
where dust and whispers can collect in our strongest of bones;
incendiary syllables that mark us
make us rethink who we really are
what really makes us us
what constitutes a you
a me, a being
with a will, with a bunch of woes
and a hell of a lot of fights
to be fought
with all the wrong fighters
and all the right lighters, catalysts
we burn each other
we burn ourselves and laugh
as our skins get darker in the sunshine
we are all heating up in this oven of a planet
except for you, you're an icecube that got thrown down my
low-cut shirt and for some odd, inexplicable reason
i really just want to leave you there (close to my heart)
02why do023 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
scared scarred sacred
use the same letters?
(because they're all about the same thing:
fear and living through it.)
SmokeI don't know if it's the smoke in my lungs or your lips on mine, but I swear I am floating in my own skin, so close to drifting away, just like the gray haze that spirals towards the ceilingSmoke3 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
But you hold me to you, deliciously too tight, as if you feel me falling away
And with my hands locked around your wrists and the amber scent of you deep in my chest, I know I would not leave you.
I will never leave you
The mist is cool as it prickles over my skin, but it warms to the blood tumbling through the translucent blue veins of my wrists.
The scent is sharper than I remember, harsh and biting, as though the amber curves are turning to razor blades, sharp and lethal and warning you away.
I anoint the hollows beneath my ears and the sharp points of my clavicle with my fingertips and I imagine that she is still holding me too tightly, and so I am almost safe.
Because there are lines drawn into me that you dare not cross, and because there are some promises I still keep.
And I am kee