A Letter to My Five-Year Old Self.Dear me,A Letter to My Five-Year Old Self.9 months ago in Letters More Like This
You will not be able to read this letter, because you are only five years old and five year old Korean girls in 1998 generally don't have the ability to read complex English prose. I regret this dearly because I have some important things that I want you to know, and you won't do so until you're too old and it's too late.
But sometimes you need to get it out there, and God help me, so I will.
You're in the apex of your life and you're happy. Your father loves you, your mother loves you, you're on a trek around Europe and you're the sweetest, quietest, most polite little girl. You best enjoy it because it's not going to last very long. I'm sorry to say this, but it won't. But if I told you this in person you'd just blink up at me with liquid-black eyes and shrug before running off to laugh at life. So here it's going to go.
In 2000 you're going to be sent to England. It's not your fault this time around, you didn't ask for it.
There you'll attend primary school and meet the boy
Mama LibertyMama I am off to explore the world!Mama Liberty1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
My petticoats and dresses are folded and packed
My hair brushed into obedience
My tongue carefully laden
With this heavy, guttural language
No more will I hang onto your apron strings
Gone are the days I suckled at your breast
For my bones are strong enough now
To carry my weight into new lands
And so I say goodbye
As I board the steamboat
Eager to see what the world holds for me.
Mother mine I am home!
What is this?
Do you not recognize your little girl
Of so long ago?
I will admit I have been changed
By the beautiful country
I now proudly call my motherland,
For she is a rosy woman
Who lives within crumbling castles
Fattening her children
With meat and potatoes
As she happily weaves her tapestries of history
I left my home of plenty and ease
To be dazzled and confused
By the new culture and language.
I mimicked others as I learned to speak
Turning the hard edges and soft middles
Of the words
Over in my mouth
Like a sort of candy with sharp
So What if I'm a Slytherin?Yes, I'm in SlytherinSo What if I'm a Slytherin?4 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
You gotta problem with that?
So what if I like the colors
Green and silver?
I can do whatever I want!
I'll be a Slytherin!
I'll hate Gryffindor!
I'll like snakes!
What? You don't like Slytherins?
Prayer for an Adopted ChildClose your eyes, my childPrayer for an Adopted Child8 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'll hold you close for now
Rest here in my arms
Sleep now, beside my heart
Before the morning comes
Forgive me, my child
Tell me it won't be forever
Walk with me, now
I'll carry you down this path
So that you may know the way home
Open your eyes, my child
Your dark eyes, the image of my own
What do you see?
And does your heart pray
That someday, we will meet again?
TeufelskunstTeufelskunst4 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Dedicated to the First Harvester and His Bride
A Praise to the Devil - our Horned Guide
An Eternal Ode to the Twofold One
The Guardian of the Array of the Black Sun
Who commences this Reign of Infernal Night
Brings forth the Vision of Haunted Light
Breaks down all vessels so pure and white
Forever in Darkness - a Merciless Rite
Outside this Ring of Fire and Thorn
They manifest now Their Rule and Scorn
When black, green and red blood flow in Their name
They engender this dark soul again and again
Until that night when all is blackened
All blood has been shed and all minds have been maddened
When the rooster has cried his very last cry
All lights extinguished and none left to die
Pull the TriggerIt's funny,Pull the Trigger2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I thought I was back to normal,
Back to living a life,
A life where I didn't have to watch my actions.
I was settling back,
Into a state of a single mind,
A state in which,
Nothing could go wrong inside my head.
Then I heard it,
A whispered sentence,
One that didn't make sense,
But one that I understood.
I clicked inside,
I felt my mentality shift,
From sane to maniac,
In less than a second.
I felt the pained soul inside me rising up,
Ready to strike like a cobra.
I felt the roaring heart within me stretching,
Letting go a cry of swift action.
I felt the crazed mind lurking in my head,
Break into tatters and all speak at once.
I laugh now as inside my mind,
I can see it,
Pulling the trigger,
Pointing the barrel at my tattered heart.
StressAs my brain whirls,Stress2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Filled with "what if"s and
Though I try to relax,
I continue to stress...
I know we can do this,
I would fight to the Death.
for this to work,
for my dad and mom to say yes.
But it continues to run through my mind...
what if it still doesn't work?
what if... what if we can't?
I can't go back,I can't.
And here's where I stress,and I shake
and I can't breathe
and I feel I'm going to cry,or explode
or go insane.
And here's where I need himhere
by my side.And here's where I shut upbecause I feel badfor dumping thison you
I just need......
I sleep with the lights onIt began early in my life; the anxious awakening to the sounds of murmurs and whispers, the sight of ominous figures looming over me and peering over the edge of my bedside at me.I sleep with the lights on2 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
I saw faces...creepy ones with wide, staring eyes. Sometimes I saw empty eye sockets, and sometimes even more disturbing things would happen, like teeth falling out, or massive amounts of insects pouring from a gaping mouth.
Sometimes I felt as though I were covered with insects...it was really disgusting. Sometimes I felt as though my bed was spinning.
Sometimes I just couldn't move, and every time, I couldn't speak. I couldn't scream.
Till the spell on me broke, and there I was; flinching and screaming.
Sometimes I would run from my room screaming.
One time I decided to be brave, and I stood tall atop my bunk bed and braced myself with a pillow to defend myself from the shadowy figure in the doorway.
Whatever was there usually disappeared after I would scream or hide or try to get away...
LonelyI'll look in the mirrorLonely1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
when the sun comes up
and I'll grimace at the straight rows of teeth,
like lies tied to the wires
that hang from the corners of my mouth
when it twists into a sly grin.
You don't get to ask for love,
and you know you've done something wrong.
You've woken up on the wrong side
of the sun,
where everything is black,
where the lace of her bra
lies dead on your mattress
and where new beginnings
Dirty IvoryStrolling out from aDirty Ivory2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I remembered yesterday's
remember the sunrise.
walking behind the
alleyway in the
With the gravel beneath
my feet making a
crunching sound, but
getting pushed around like
too many faces in a
man with a trenchcoat
under one arm.
Lighting a new
cigarette with the ash
of his spent one.
-And the word "silk"
tatooed on his wrinkled
wings, most of
all, his ivory
Sick.life slouches against the doorSick.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
[i think i can hear it crying]
sickly grins lick my lips;
rub the undersides
of scream-sore throats
stained with the sweetest sort of bruise
screams all my own
swallowed in cotton lungs
pressure in my skull
fire in my veins
holding the skin i had
clinging tighter to fragility
and i just can't find
the strength to cry
the night stretches on for months
i shake like a leaf
end life, end.when i was almost god,end life, end.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and my fingers were honeycombs
woven into embroidered dreams,
is when my breath danced
in your hair,
(never to be tamed)
your lashes weighing down your eyelids,
joining fingers with the ones below.
a wish escapes from between your teeth
(a cavity in the brain,
it's acid, it's acid. it's acid.
pleasant thoughts poison the mind)
end, life. end.
(wade into the ocean,
salt fills your lungs that shrivel up
like slugs in the desert sun)
alienationYou woke up one morning and felt completely different. That is okay, because we both know that the only thing certain is that nothing ever is. I just wish you would have told me then, so I could have tried to wake up feeling different too. I'd rather hear your voice tell me these things than endlessly trying to listen close enough to hear your eyes tell me to stop kissing you. Because regardless of how pretty they are, they aren't always very clear.alienation2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
So now I lay awake in bed during the days and remember what it felt like to be wrapped up in your skin rather than my blankets. And during the weekends I fall asleep in another boys' embrace and we discuss how odd it is that when he touches me I feel at ease, but when you touch me you set my entire skin on fire. And how odd it is that he once loved me and I once loved him, but now we can't seem to remember how to love each other, and we both find ourselves wishing for other hands when we entangle our fingers. But it's so much better than sp
Genius?Genius?Genius?3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
War in Iraq,
Drama for Drama's Sake,
War in Libya,
Buy! Buy! Sell! Sell!
Sell Your Soul.
How do you not be a cliché when not being cliché is cliché?
Sometimes success is the line between
Genius and Insanity
So am I a genius, insane or just a product,
Of my times?
RemorseRemorse2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A cowered glance
upon concealed reflections
seeking divine redemption
by unspoken shame,
the burden of blame.
AMY - whimsicalworks
Midst The ShelvesHidden midst the shelves built to lend, I thinkMidst The Shelves3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Chairs between us
I count before I am again distracted
By your each and every feature
Concentrating on an essay I have yet to begin
In my most pitiful of selves, I consider
Pick-up lines I have read online
I am ashamed to know what they are
But not how to use the cliché tip-offs on you
Written on my soul of my shoe, I see
Times I have spelled your name with mine
Immortalized until I walk one mile too far
The black ink fading with the wearing of rubber
Hidden midst the shelves built to lend, I move
I only count until I am again distracted
By your each and every feature
Now would be a good time to see if I can distract you too
The InevitableIt has been ten years of trying to ignore the inevitable.The Inevitable1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Wishing and praying for more time.
Wishing I could stop every clock
and keep him here as mine.
Remembering sunsets on the water and brown eyes.
Those were our best days.
Before frightening 12 am phone calls
and his extended hospital stays.
I tell myself I've known all along
and still it leaves me feeling so unprepared.
I never did stop loving him.
There were no secrets left unshared.
Time seems to be passing faster now.
This panic makes it harder for me to breathe.
I spend my spare moments bargaining with God.
Does he really have to leave?
I know I will fall apart
when I can no longer hear his voice
and he is no longer a phone call away.
When there are no more goodnights at the end of a long day.
I swear to you, I love him.
I loved him from the first day.
God knows, I would give anything
just for him to stay.
My New Personal Quote"I am the proud owner of three closets. Two are just minor extensions to my room, where i keep clothing and stuff that i can't actually fit into my room. But, the third one is in my mind, and is also the one i am least proud of. i hope to someday abandon the third."My New Personal Quote3 years ago in Philosophical More Like This