Transformers: All for OneTitle: All for One
Author's Note: This is currently a one shot, but if people like it and comment, I'll add more one shot chapters. My humorous stories tend to focus on Bumblebee, so I thought I'd shake things up and try my hand at a funny Decepticon story. I hope Starscream, Thundercracker and Skywarp are not too OOC-ish (it's been years since I saw the G1 show and I mainly know them from the IDW comics). Time unit conversion Nano-klik: ~ 1 second; Deca-cycle: ~ 3 weeks
"Slaggit! This is ridiculous!" Skywarp ranted. "This is not our responsibility. It's it's demeaning!"
Forty-three, Thundercracker silently counted to himself. Forty-three outbursts. His trine brother had been complaining, loudly, since Megatron had assigned them to this cursed duty. Not that he blamed his wingmate. For unknown reasons, the trine had been assigned construction duty. Of all things, construction duty. They were hauling large metal beams over a
TF: All for One - Implausibly Colored PachydermsTitle: All for One Implausibly Colored PachydermsTF: All for One - Implausibly Colored Pachyderms3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Warnings (kind of): Long
Author's Note: This is a standalone story (like the previous chapters). It does reference my story 'Holiday Cheer,' but all backstory is provided for you. I wrote the energon cubes as about hand-sized, just because it makes more sense. Time conversions Joor: 6 hours, Deca-cycle: approx. 3 weeks, Vorn: 83 years. Talking through comm channels is shown, ::like this.::
Thundercracker surveyed the mess hall. This late between shifts, only a few other 'cons were gathered, sipping their rations. He cupped his cube in his hands, hiding its contents. Once he confirmed no one was glancing his way, he stood and used the motion to slip the half full cube into a hidden compartment. The others ignored him. Satisfied, he left.
As the blue Seeker traveled toward the lift, his trine mate Skywarp approached walking, Thundercracker noted with surprise from the oth
TF: All for One - HideTitle: All for One HideTF: All for One - Hide3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Author's Note: This is technically the second chapter of my All for One story line, but it's completely standalone and can be read without reading the first chapter. The main premise for these ficlets is one group member getting the entire group punished for something he's done; a new take on the phrase 'all for one.' Comm transmissions are marked with colons ::like this.::
"Hid ? Wha ? Why? And, slag it Skywarp, I have a door!" Thundercracker growled at his trine mate. The black and purple mech had just materialized in the middle of his quarters, ignoring, as always, such common place courtesies as doors and knocking. Thundercracker leaned back in his berth, turning back to his datapad, and tried to tune out his fellow Seeker.
"I know you have a door! Who cares? We gotta go! Find someplace safe " Skywarp wrung his hands, eyes darting between his wing mate and the c
Transformers: All for One - Friendly FireTitle: All for One Friendly FireTransformers: All for One - Friendly Fire3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Warnings: None (trust me)
Author's Note: Thundercracker tries to break up a fight between his trine mates, with unforeseen consequences. This is the sixth part of the 'All for One' series, but each one is a standalone fic and can be read without any knowledge of the others. Internet cookies to anyone who notices the Star Trek reference. Time conversions klik: 1.2 minutes, joor: 6 hours, solar cycle: 1 day, deca-cycle: approximately 3 weeks, vorn: 83 years. Talking through comm channels is shown, ::like this.::
"You killed him." Skywarp stared at the body. He, Starscream and Thundercracker stood, frozen, as they considered the sight before them. They were in the main corridor leading from the mess hall to the upper level storage. Besides the three of them, the only other mech present was the still form at their feet.
"No, I didn't," Starscream countered. "I was aiming at you. Thundercracker grabbed my arm, which cau
TF All for One- The Boring OneTitle: All for One The Boring OneTF All for One- The Boring One3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Author's Note: This is a stand alone story, although it's technically the third part of this series. This can be read without any previous knowledge of the others, although there is a passing reference to the second story. The theme behind these ficlets is one member of the Elite Trine (Starscream, Thundercracker and Skywarp) gets the whole group into trouble. Talking through comm channels is shown, ::like this.::
"This has become tedious, Skywarp. Stop boring me with your lies, and tell me what you did!"
"Ha! That's funny coming from you, Starscream, the master of lies! I didn't do anything, and you know it! I'm completely innocent. I refuse to be blamed for whatever you did this time."
"You are many things: moronic, juvenile, stupid, irresponsible, repugnant." Starscream counted the words out with his fingers. "The list goes on and on. But no where on that list does the word 'innoce
TF: All for One - The Easter MonsterTitle: All for One The Easter MonsterTF: All for One - The Easter Monster3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Author's Note: This is the fifth standalone story of my All for One series. Each one can be read alone. This is for the TransAuthors group's Easter contest (prompt 'Easter Funnies'). Time conversion klik: approximately one minute.
"Oh, Primus, what's he doing?" Thundercracker winced.
"It's Skywarp. You don't want to know." Starscream did not bother to look up from the data card he held. "Just ignore him."
Thundercracker glanced at his trine leader. The other Seeker was right. Life was easier when he ignored Skywarp. But despite this sound advice, he couldn't keep his gaze away from the purple and black mech.
The three of them, and a few other Decepticons, were in the mess hall. Most of the first shift mechs had already finished their rations and left. A few, like Ravage, had arrived late and just now started sipping their energon. Thundercracker had finished his own fuel a while ago, but felt co
Transformers: Holiday CheerTitle: Holiday CheerTransformers: Holiday Cheer3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Author's Note: Frenzy and Rumble decide to partake in a holiday tradition as only they can. This is a humorous one-shot that is completely standalone from my other stories. It does make a small reference to the third chapter in my All for One series (The Boring One), but that one doesn't need to be read to understand this.
"Hey there, Blue. How's it going?"
Thundercracker pulled up short as Frenzy and Rumble greeted him, both grinning widely, arms clasped behind their backs. He contemplated fleeing back over the ocean as the two stepped to either side of the lift and gestured him on board. Either of them smiling meant trouble. Both, together and smiling, was catastrophic. Had the primitive humans known of those two, they'd have added their antics to the signs of a coming apocalypse. Undeterred by his hesitation, they stepped forward onto the Nemesis' landing pad and grabbed his elbows, one
Transformers - All for One: WarTitle: All for One – WarTransformers - All for One: War2 years ago in Humor More Like This
Warnings: None (It is long)
Author's Note: This is a standalone story (like the previous chapters). Skywarp plans vengeance against two trouble-making brothers. Time conversions – Klik: approx. 1 min, Joor: 6 hours, Deca-cycle: approx. 3 weeks, Vorn: 83 years. Talking through comm channels is shown, ::like this.::
"This is war!" Skywarp said in a harsh whisper.
Thundercracker paused, then glanced over his station controls. With a few flicks of switches, he set the bridge computers to inform him of any status changes. Satisfied the automatic alerts were in place, he turned to face his wing mate. Not speaking, he crossed his arms and leaned back in his seat. And stared.
The purple and black Seeker stared back. After a few moments, Skywarp burst out, still whispering, "What?"
"One: we've been fighting for how many tens of thousands of vorns, and you just now realized we're at war? And two: we're on bridge duty. This is m
Transformers: Subterfuge Ch 1NOTE: This is based on the movie-verse continuity.This fic occurs about a year after Revenge of the Fallen. Soundwave is still in orbit, and Laserbeak is the only Transformer from DOTM who makes an appearance in this. Rated GTransformers: Subterfuge Ch 14 years ago in Sci-Fi More Like This
Truly, the indigenous lifeforms of this planet were convoluted, Starscream mused. Case in point, he considered the name they bestowed to the landmass he flew over. More than 75% of the surface was covered in ice, yet the fleshings called this place 'Greenland.' In fact, little green existed anywhere here. The Decepticon idly scanned for the color as he patrolled, compiling a ratio of occurrence between green and other colors present to pass his time. The results did not impress him.
As he circled toward the west coast, he strayed within a few miles of one of the humans scientific stations. The weather was clear as it had been on Starscream's other flybys and he wondered if the 'observation outpost' would 'observe' him. H
Transformers: Family CircusTitle: Transformers: Family CircusTransformers: Family Circus3 years ago in Humor More Like This
Author's Note: This is for the Crystal-Nexus Big Contest. The theme is 'Circus.' Comm communication is signaled, ::like this.:: Word count 2365 (without Author's notes)
It started with a teddy bear.
The thing seemed innocuous, with its dark brown fur and overly large eyes. It smiled serenely, as only a plush animal could. Holding its arms out wide, it reached for a hug. At odds with its peaceful demeanor was its glaring outfit: red and white striped pants, royal blue long-tailed jacket with red lining, and a red top hat, the blue underside covered in white stars. Still, even the wild clothes weren't enough to draw Frenzy's attention to it. The small Decepticon studied this strange stuffed creature for one reason.
Frenzy was bored.
Those three words caused near panic when uttered in the Decepticon base, the Nemesis. A similar reaction occurred with the phrase, 'Rumble is bored.' The two brothers cou
One Human, One Spark"Ha-ha, Jackie's back!"One Human, One Spark3 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
That had been Bulkhead's excited crow for seeing the ol' Wrecker again, but as he should have expected with Wheeljack, that happiness came with a price. Slopes had turned slippery when his brash friend had accidentally blown up a human gas station in his eager drive to finally take down Dreadwing. It only got worse when his independent buddy had butted heads with Optimus because he wasn't used to taking ordersa Wrecker had a Wrecker's pride, after all, and Bulkhead knew it was going to be hard for Wheeljack to take orders from anyone but the OLD big head honcho.
Instead, after a touchy medical checkup for his wounded shoulder and spitting hot words at both Optimus and Fowler, Wheeljack had stalked out to his ship in order to cool down. Bulkhead followed him into the night, seeking to soothe his friend's wired nerves.
After an unsuccessful time of trying to get Wheeljack to see the difference, Bulkhead finally turned back around to his brooding friend. "Jac
Transformers: Tarnished IdolsTitle: Transformers: Tarnished IdolsTransformers: Tarnished Idols3 years ago in Sci-Fi More Like This
Warnings: Mild Angst, Claustrophobia
Author's Note: Time doesn’t heal all wounds. Some wounds fester. Time conversion – vorn: 83 years.
“I swear I will kill Rumble,” Starscream said, mouth twisted into a fierce grimace.
Dust filled the room, blinding his optics and clogging his vents. He forced several quick bursts of air through them. Perhaps he could clear the overworked mechanisms. It didn’t work. As soon as he hacked some out, more dust flowed in. Now he resembled some sort of pathetic organic thing, clearing its respiratory organs. He cursed quietly. At least his vocals weren’t tied intrinsically to his vents, like some fleshling.
Warnings on his HUD display pinged as his internal temperature slowly started climbing and his vents failed to compensate. Nothing serious. Yet. He planned to be long gone before the dust and heat buildup caused any permanen
To Love the Enemy'Arcee...'To Love the Enemy4 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Arcee opened her optics to see a dark silhouette hovering over her. The only light source came from the light blue optics peering down at her. She squinted a little, the blurry figure starting to become more clear, even if it was still a shadow. She recognized the two horn-like ornaments on top of its head, and the blue optics held a certain familiarity about them that made her almost instantly remember who it was.
She smiled at her old friend and reached out to place a servo on his faceplates. As soon as she touched him though, an icy cold jolted through her systems, making her pull back and shiver violently. Her smile dropped completely when she saw the shining blue optics turn light purple, as did the rest of the cracks and crevices in his frame. He leaned down closer to her and she saw the monster dark energon had turned her friend into.
No, he was not a friend anymore. A sparkless corpse was all he was. A sparkless corpse who was currently p
A Study of Twins: Ch. OneChapter OneA Study of Twins: Ch. One7 years ago in Fan Fiction More Like This
Ratchet was woken from recharge by the sound of crying sparklings echoing through the unit. He groaned and nuzzled against Ironhide lightly. He felt the larger mech put his arms around his waist as the crying continued. It took both of them several breems to realize that the crying came from the sparklings that theyd settled into the room just across from their own. Ratchet on-lined his optics and pushed himself away from Ironhide, getting off the berth and sleepily heading into the other room.
Sideswipe was crying at the highest pitch his vocalizer could manage and Sunstreakers cries were just as loud, if not louder than his brothers. The medic leaned over the edge of the crib and picked up Sideswipe, pulling him close and cradling him. The sparkling slowly started calming down as Ratchet bounced him up and down. Ratchet knew the young mech couldnt be hungry; a quick scan showed Sideswipes energy levels as normal and he had just
Whoops...Ironhide and Sideswipe are on the Panama City beach fighting ten Decepticons. Optimus sent them on a mission to search for any Decepticons on the beach, but the evil Cybertronians turned the tables on them with an ambush. Now they have to come up with a good plan. The two Autobots have their backs on each other as the Decepticons surround them, weapons ready to fire.Whoops...4 years ago in Humor More Like This
"Hey, 'Hide. Got any ideas yet?" Sideswipe asks, not taking his optics off the Decepticons in front of him. The bigger mech does the same, but answers.
"Yeah. Transform to vehicle mode then spin your tires."
"I am not messing up my paint, Ironhide!"
"Do you want to go offline or do you want to live?!"
Sideswipe groans then remembers something. A part of his arm reveals a hole. He puts his right arm behind him then a ball comes out of the hole, rolls down his arm, and stops when its in the palm of his hand. The Autobot puts his arm to the front of him, lifts it up high then he slams the ball down to the sand. It bursts open
Transformers: EmissionsNOTE: This takes place in the movie-verse, and is just for fun.Transformers: Emissions4 years ago in Humor More Like This
"Hey, check that one out," Carl nodded to his station partner.
"Tell me you're looking at a girl this time," Austin replied, not looking up. Carl was far too easily impressed. Ten times a day he pointed out a new vehicle to drool over. And, sadly, the Boss Lady continued assigning Carl with him.
"Well, um, no. But really, this one's awsome. Seriously check it out."
Austin sighed. He dragged his eyes out over the lines of cars waiting for their emissions tests. It took only a moment to see what had caught Carl's eye this time. Next in line was a brilliant yellow, brand new, smoking hot Camaro, complete with twin racing stripes. Austin raised his eyebrows. Okay, Carl had a point. That was one awsome ride.
"Oh, man, can I take that one through?" Carl licked his lips.
"No way. It's my turn and you know it."
"Dammit, Austin! You owe me for, for, um that thing, that one time. Um. C'mon! Have pity, man."
"Not. A. Ch
Transformers: Subterfuge Ch 2NOTE: This is based on the movie-verse continuity.This fic occurs about a year after Revenge of the Fallen. Soundwave is still in orbit, and Laserbeak is the only Transformer from DOTM who makes an appearance in this. Rated GTransformers: Subterfuge Ch 24 years ago in Sci-Fi More Like This
"I don't like it. It's too obvious. It has to be a trap." Ironhide motioned to the human's table, covered with the various objects the species seemed to believe necessary.
"It's not that obvious, though," Lt. Col. William Lennox replied. "Satellites have flown over Greenland " he shuffled through some papers, "well, regardless, they've been over that place a lot, and haven't seen any sign of anything. Yet these villagers and a couple science stations in the middle of nowhere spot a jet? Not once, but several times? If it is Starscream, and he's trying to lure us in, why hide from the satellites? That's the sure way to get our attention. It's just weird."
"Starscream is infamous for laying traps. For that reason alone, I tend to agr
100 Ways to Annoy Starscream100 Ways to Annoy Starscream:100 Ways to Annoy Starscream4 years ago in Humor More Like This
1) Inform him that Megatron will always be the better leader of the Decepticons. Always.
2) Take a video of Megatron beating up Screamer and post it on Youtube. Be sure every Decepticon and Autobot sees it so they can taunt him about being Megatron's bitch.
3) Ask Starscream where his 'Kiss the Cook' apron is. After all, he has pointed out in multiple universes that he is 'home Megatron' like the good little wife he is.
4) Tell G1 Screamer that in Prime he has 'obsolete' technology that he refuses to upgrade it. Oh yeah, and he no longer has his precious null-ray.
5) Tell Starscream that he is a lying, big-headed, bitchy suck-up of a whimp.
6) Ask Screamer what's up with the constant change in his chin size. Does he enjoy cosmetic surgery that much?
7) Ask Screamer also if that bad attitude has to do with the size of his... ahem... you know.
8) Related to number 7 if you're daring, add that "It's no wonder Megatron's the dominant one in the relation
Transformers:Subterfuge EplgueNOTE: This is based on the movie-verse continuity.This fic occurs about a year after Revenge of the Fallen. Soundwave is still in orbit, and Laserbeak is the only Transformer from DOTM who makes an appearance in this. Rated GTransformers:Subterfuge Eplgue4 years ago in Sci-Fi More Like This
Megatron ordered them out of Greenland. Starscream was not surprised. With Megatron's hiding place exposed, they needed another location for their glorious leader to continue sulking.
As he escorted them, Starscream briefly entertained the idea of leading his illustrious leader within visual range of the only human outpost this far out. One last chance for the Autobots. He discarded this. Should they find his small troupe, Megatron would expect him to throw his life away protecting the failing leader's worthless carcass. Unacceptable.
Starscream had no qualms about abandoning Megatron to die. However, Soundwave still orbited the planet, monitoring everything below. The spymaster, and several other Decepticons, revered Megatron. If he allowed Megatr
Squishy Skipping on SundaysIt was a bright, clear Sunday morning over the Hoover Dam, and Prime was enjoying his early morning drive. It had been difficult to get his brain around the concept of days, weeks and months on this little planet, but Sunday days were definately his favourite because they were always so quiet.Squishy Skipping on Sundays7 years ago in Humor More Like This
As he was returning to the old S7 site which had now been converted into his official residence, he noticed two pairs of wings perched on the very top of the dam. One silver, one gold, both neatly folded up and very close together, obviously trying not to be noticed. There were only two Cybertronians on Earth who had wings - Megatron in silver, and Starscream in gold. These two never sat together for long without fighting, so Prime immediately knew they were either a) doing something that would get them in trouble or b) already in trouble and planning their way out of it or c) lying low until they could cause more trouble later.
If they're swapping rude websites again they're both going over t
Love BiteThunderbee Prime, a week old sparkling, recharges in a corner of medic bay. After having a fun day with the new Prime, his parents decided to let him rest. Sitting right next to the sparkling, with his energon pistol out and ready, is his father, Electro Prime. There's a reason why he has his weapon out. A group of Decepticons almost kidnapped his son twice, that was enough to make him paranoid and overprotective. But the medic on the other hand doesn't think the weapon is necessary since the sparkling is in good hands. It doesn't matter to Electro though, and everywhere to him now is dangerous for a sparkling. Putting up his tools, Ratchet sighs at Electro.Love Bite4 years ago in Sci-Fi More Like This
"He's never going to be a strong and tough Prime if you keep doing this. He needs to get used to Earth, Electro. I remember when you were scared of grass until your father told you it wouldn't hurt you. Keeping the poor sparkling from learning won't help him get through life," Ratchet says to the father. Maybe Electro is being a bi
Transformers: Regrets-Regrets-Transformers: Regrets7 years ago in Fan Fiction More Like This
Have you ever been hurt by someone you love?
Blaster looked up at the question and the large mech whod asked it. Skyfire sat not far from the communications officer. Looking at the jet, one could see a mixture of emotions on his face, the most identifiable being sadness, anger, and pain. Blaster had seen that particular trio of emotion on the faces of his fellow Autobots for centuries and for many different reasons; a lot of the mechs who now called themselves Autobots had been hurt by friends and lovers whod fallen in with the Decepticons when the war began anew.
Skyfire was one whose pain was still new. Blaster knew that Starscreams allegiance to the Decepticons hurt the other mech, especially after Skyfire had seen the coldness in which Starscream carried out plans to attack the Autobots and the humans who allied themselves with them. He could see the pain etched into the faceplates of the larger mech and knew that the question he
Operation: Altruism chapter 1~Altruism - The principle or practice of unselfish concern for or devotion to the welfare of others; Opposite of egoism~Operation: Altruism chapter 14 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
A pregnant pause followed the announcement as everyone stopped what they were doing to let the information sink in. Even Arcee, who was still writhing in pain on the berth, couldn't help but sit up and stare in shock at both doctors. She held in an intake of air, as if waiting for the punchline to this joke. When her optics finally settled on Knockout, his dumbfounded expression confirmed that this wasn't a joke at all. She was really sparked.
"What does that mean? Being sparked?"
Of course it didn't take long for Miko to let her curiosity get the better of her and ask that question aloud. Jack would've stopped her, if he wasn't nearly as curious as Miko was.
Ratchet, noticing Knockout still fixated on the results, answered the question to the best of his ability.
"Being sparked means Arcee is carrying another life force in her spark ch
Decepticon rules of the baseRules of the base:Decepticon rules of the base6 years ago in Humor More Like This
1. Stop abusing Starscream. That is Megatrons hobby.
2. Don't fire any weapons inside the base. We are under water and don't need anymore leaks.
3. No human fanfiction about Transformers is allowed on Decepticon territory. a) Especialy not slash. b) Especialy not slash including Megatron and Starscream. c) Be warned that slash jokes will be severely punished.
4. The spacebridge is not intended as a place to dump garbage.
5. Human bowling is not allowed inside the base. We can do withouth the mess they make when they die. a) A exception is made for human writers of slash fanfiction.
6. If Shockwave calls Megatron is not home.
7. No filthy organics are to be used as pets. a) Especialy not humans. b) Yes Starscream that goes for dr Arkeville aswell.
8. Everyone must use protection. a) Especialy you Soundwave, we do NOT want to see anymore of your annoying casettes everywhere.
9. Devastator is never going to be challenged to a dance off again.
10. There is no such thing