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(Rick’s GUIDE to everything I’ve learned in my first year)

Disclaimer: These are simply things I have learned, and what I personally do for each of my drawings. There are many ways to draw, such as line drawings, cross-hatching, non-blending, etc, but my chosen area is one that strives for Realism. I am 100% self-taught, meaning that I never went to Art school. I drew for maybe a total of maybe 5 hours since I was a teenager. Then in October of 2008, I decided I needed a hobby. I’m just as surprised as others at the results? I also wonder why I just NOW discovered I that can draw? Now, almost 1 year later, I have completed over 91 portraits, which is a total of between 400 and 600 hours of practice!!! Later, someone suggested I call a local college and offer to teach a course on portrait drawing. They actually created a course for me, which I get to design the class 100% start to finish. As PART of that class, I am making this TIP GUIDE to give the students. So far, there are 8 people who signed up. I’m excited to see if teaching artists get better, is my calling, or if I will even enjoy it? We shall see?? In the 10 hours together, I am going to take them start to finish through the same celebrity portrait, using the steps outlined below.

1) CLEAN HANDS: I always start by washing my hands of any oil or dirt that would damage the drawing surface area. NEVER touch the area you are drawing on and NEVER use your finger to blend. That’s what I’ve read AND experienced. I also use copy paper to lay over parts of a drawing I don’t want to lay my hand across. Some say to work from upper left to downward right, if you are right handed, but I don’t always WANT to work that way.

2) PHOTOS: I have gotten really good at finding good photos on the web! There are lots of sites, but I find plenty at Google by using “images of _________” in the search box. There is SO much I could type about photos, but the main things I do, BECAUSE I crop the photo to use only the head, is to only use a photo that has a file size large enough not to become blurry and pixilated after I print it to THE SAME SIZE I’m going to draw it. There are reasons for that, but mainly because I want my eyes to draw a 1:1 ratio of what I see. I use a photo program to crop the photo, to remove color (saturation), which makes it a Black and White photo, and to improve Contrast (making the lights lighter and the darks darker). If you are in to taking your own photos, use natural light, so that shadows define the facial features. I also crop the top of the head off, if you’ve noticed, for two reasons. ONE is that it gives the illusion that the subject is closer to you. Grab a newspaper and notice now how most all of the columnists crop the tops of their heads off. It’s for this reason! SECOND, I hate drawing hair, and this is the side benefit of cropping. Note: you do not have to draw every single detail in a photo. If there is an area that looks strange, it will look strange when you draw it? Create something else.

3) SIZE: Yes, size does matter in drawing! I read that if you make a drawing just 20% larger, will take up to 50% more time to draw. I have personally found that the IDEAL size for ME, is to keep the total face size between 5 to 6 INCHES from the hairline to the bottom of the chin. If it’s TOO big, there are too many details to ignore, and I find it affects the motion of my blending. If it is too small, obviously you cannot get enough details. For ME, it is about finding the balance between the level of details and how long it takes me to draw, because I get bored fast and want to move on. I have my total AVERAGE drawing time down to somewhere between 3 to 5 hours.

4) PAPER: Much can be said about types of drawing papers, and I have tried many. The main types I tried early on, were Strathmore and Canson MEDIUM tooth “Drawing” papers. I have SINCE moved on to using ONLY “Strathmore’s Bristol Smooth 300 series, for many reasons. It is THICK paper. Its “tooth” is not easily destroyed and you can get DARK darks from it. It is PERFECT for blending graphite; it forgives easily and has excellent eras-ability! If you notice now, my Chevy Chase was the FIRST time I used Bristol smooth, and all drawings since, and you should see a difference in contrast? It took some getting used to, because it draws darker, meaning the pencils you use show lighter than you may be used to, so I use a lot more B and 2B pencils now. View or buy it here: [link]

5) PENCILS: I have also tried many types, but will now ONLY use “Staedtler pencils, made in Germany. They are excellent, and have predictable and consistent” results. I find them at [link] along with everything else I need!!! Always make SURE your pencil is SHARP!!! There many ways, the obvious of which is an electric sharpener, which I use, but I sometimes fine-tune the point with fine sandpaper, or by rubbing the point sideways on a scrap piece of paper. I have also tried “Clutch Pencils” or called “Lead Holders”. I use BOTH but for different reasons and parts of the drawing. The advantages of using Clutch Pencils are that their weight and length remain consistent, unlike pencils that are constantly shrinking in size and weight. It’s also cheaper to buy just the graphite refills than whole pencils. Staedtler make both the holders and the refills. Go to [link] There are a wide range of darks and lights, but I use only the middle range. Rarely 2H and H, a lot of F, HB and 80% B and 2B. I have the following, just in case (light to dark) 2H, H, F, HB, B, 2B, 3B, 4B, 5B, 6B, 9B

6) OUTLINE: I START with an outline. You want to get a feel for the layout and perspective. Once I draw an outline, I move on to the border.

7) BORDER: After I finish my outline, I take a ruler, and establish the framed sides of my drawing, so I know where it ends. I do NOT ever (maybe I should?) draw to any frame specific size that can fit a standard frame. I have not framed any of my drawings, but if and when I do, I will have it custom matted, which will then fit a standard sized frame. I store all of my drawings in “Display Books” which are clear plastic sleeves that protect them. I also seal each drawing with a spray “workable fixative” (more on that later)

8) EYES: I ALWAYS start with the eyes!!! They are the “windows to a soul” and if you don’t get them write, why waste time finishing the drawing. (That’s just how I feel). I usually just finish one eye, and move on to start the first layer on other areas. I never finish the first eye 100% at first. The important things to remember are the “key highlights” or spots of light in every photo, and person you see. One basic rule that I read and remember as to eyes and feature placement is this: Eyes are approximately in the center of the face, about half way between the top of the forehead and the bottom of the chin, and are approximately the same distance APART from each other as the width of a single eye (not always). The bottom of the NOSE is then about half way between the eyes and bottom of chin; the mouth is about half way between the bottom of the nose and bottom of the chin. These are obviously rough guidelines. Remember, eyes are NOT pure white! I use a light touch with a blending stump around the corners of the eyes, on MOST drawings. The same goes with teeth.

9) CONTRAST is always been just obvious to me, and I believe is one of the main things that take a drawing to the “next level”? I have learned to select a photo that has a wide range of contrast and as many variations in between! I discovered that I am FIRST inspired by a dramatic photo with lots of contrast, NOT so much the celebrity, but when you find BOTH, it’s magic!!! One way I have trained my eyes to see Contrast, besides printing the photo in Black and White, is to sometimes, TURN the DIRECT light you are using, AWAY from you. You will be amazed at what you see in darker lighting conditions! I use a drawing desk now, with a combo swing-arm light/magnifying glass. I USED to, and sometimes still do, use a Lap-Desk, which is portable. Another KEY thing I do, is to CONSTANTLY walk away from the drawing, and come back with “fresh eyes”. Things I could NOT see or notice before, become obvious to me. Especially, first thing in the morning. In the 4 to 5 hours I invest with each drawing, I may start and come back 10-20 times!!! This keeps giving me fresh perspective.

10) TONE RANGE: I have also learned to establish the RANGE of tonal values early in a drawing. What I mean is, after drawing one eye; I look for the darkest areas of the photo, and start laying down some graphite in those areas. Another reason for starting some of the darkest areas first, is that I often get some of the graphite from those areas on my Blending Stump for use in other areas of the drawing. I don’t always start an area with a pencil, but sometimes with the graphite from an old Blending Stump, Tortillion, or Torchillon.

11) LAYERING: I find it takes many “layers” of graphite to build up certain areas. Shadows of course, lips, hair, etc. After I draw the eyes, and establish tone range, I may lightly color the lips? All lips are different, but I start with something light, like H, F, HB, or sometimes B. I look for key highlights and I’m careful to preserve those areas for later. Other areas that I layer are, eyebrows, eyelashes, hair, eye pupils, lips and of course shading.

12) SHADING: The type of shadows that are in the photo, obviously determine how dark I start? I usually start around the eyes, just after I do the first layer of the eyebrows. I take my pencil of choice and hold it lightly and sideways, so that the side of the tip is rubbing the paper, NOT the point. This makes for a larger coverage area, and can also be used to create certain effects of the skin. “Hard Shadows” are the toughest I think? Like my Sean Connery portrait. I never start the shadow or darkest part, AS DARK as it will later become. It’s something I build into, in case I need to erase.

13) BLENDING: I am convinced now that it’s ALL IN THE BLENDING!!! I use Blending Stumps, Tortillions, Torchillons, Paper towels, and sometimes Q-tips and make-up sponges. Many of the techniques would require me showing you, rather than describing them, but I will try a few. For one, I am always mindful of how much graphite is already on the stump, which determines how much pressure I apply when blending? I have many different sizes for both tight spots and large areas. Again, layering is the key. When a Blending Stump gets too much graphite on it, it tends to get slick and shiny, and stops blending. To extend it’s life, I will scrape off the excess graphite by turning it while scraping it on sandpaper until the fibers are useful again. Whether I am Shading or Blending (Rendering) I most Always blend in the SAME direction that the skin is going, in order to build the illusion of dimension and shapes. I also turn the stump as I blend, if more graphite is needed, it is usually on the other side of the stump. If not, I lay down some more with pencils, or rub it on a dark area, to get some. Keep in mind that you will need to go back over the dark areas you borrowed graphite from. More on the key to dark darks later. I do NOT always blend EVERY area of the drawing. For some effects, a light touch with a pencil only may do? But I do blend about 95% of the entire drawing (NEVER BLACK AREAS though)

14) NEGATIVE SPACE: One great trick I learned, was to use a small nail, duct tapped to an old pencil, as a stylus for scratching out whiskers, white hairs, highlights, etc. IMPORTANT: PRACTICE this before you ruin a drawing. Get an old piece of drawing paper, and practice the procedure. What I do, BEFORE (key) I put any graphite on the area, is hold the paper sideways in the light, so I can see where I am scratching, and I make the needed lines, hairs or whiskers in the paper. THEN, I rub a pencil SIDEWAYS over the scratch mark, to Expose the white lines. I can then draw between them, or what ever, but the effect is amazing to me! It’s a PERFECT tool for creating white whiskers, white hair (against dark back ground), etc. You will find many uses for this! The MAIN concept of “Negative Drawing” is that you create what you are trying to draw, NOT by drawing it, but by drawing first what surrounds the object. Hair is a perfect example (hair type depending). Hair should NOT be many pencils lines, but the shadows BETWEEN the hairs, which by default, will create the ILLUSION of hair. The same with teeth. I draw the dark areas AROUND the teeth, which as a result, forms the shape of teeth.

15) HIGHLIGHTS: They can REALLY make a drawing come to life. From the “Key Highlights in the eyes, to the glimmer on the lips, and anywhere else that either the photo shows, or you THINK it would be realistic? Highlights are best saved for last, mainly because you may be blending over the same areas beforehand. I use 3 tools for highlights. The first is the Kneaded eraser. View or buy here: [link] It can be molded into many shapes you need. A point, for small areas, a knife-edge for lines next to wrinkles, or as a blunt dabbing tool. I also use a TUFF STUFF stick eraser by Papermate. View or buy it here: [link] It is firm and rigid, and looks like a pen. I use a razor to cut an angled point for fine line, where a soft kneaded eraser may flatten and remove graphite where I don’t want it removed? The third was recently discovered when I went to an Art Workshop in August, and is called BLU*TACK found at [link] It is stretchy like a kneaded eraser, but is very sticky. I do NOT use it to rub, like a kneaded eraser, but to blot up excess graphite. It is an adhesive used to hold posters on walls, etc but an artist showed me its artist uses. One of the best tips I’ve heard and use, is that IF you want to make something lighter, like a highlight, then make what surrounds it, DARKER!

a) One of the last things I do is add fine, stray hairs, if applicable, to the edges of the hairline. I also take a sharp F or HB pencil, and make very small and short hairs along the forehead, where the hair meets the forehead (sometimes).

b) Whenever I think I’m done, I sleep on it. Invariably I notice something I swore was not there before.

c) Most every artist signs their work, in some form or another, but my dad gave me the idea to DATE each one as well, so that I could remember the order that I drew them, in case you don’t use a Display book.

d) I also use a “workable spray Fixative” to seal the drawing when it’s complete. It prevents smudging, keeps them from yellowing and also takes down the shine from the darkest areas of graphite. Here is the one I use: [link]

e) To get REALLY dark black areas, I generally use a SHARP 2B and go back and forth in small areas, expanding outward. I keep TURNING the pencil in my fingers, SO THAT the point digs deep into the TOOTH of the paper. When that area is complete, I use a harder pencil, like F or H and go over it again. IF I had used that area to grab graphite from with my blending stuff, during the drawing, I go back over it with 2B again, then F. The spray fixative will tone down the shine.

f) When I use clutch pencils, I no longer use a hand sharpener, which I used to string around my neck. I use a “Lead Pointer Tube” sharpener, which also holds the shaved graphite. View or buy here: [link]

g) I use an old paintbrush to remove dust, etc from a drawing in progress. It keeps me from rubbing it off, or spitting on the drawing when I blow it off. I didn’t notice one time, and accidentally spit a minute amount on the surface, and when I rubbed over it with my blending stump, it smeared, and I could not remove it!!

h) 7 months after discovering my passion for drawing, I bought a Drawing Table. Actually, my folks got it for my birthday. It the sports car of drawing tables! To view the one I got, go here: [link]

i) Taking Photos of your work. After a drawing is complete, I use a digital camera to take a photo of it. I first used scanners, but they lighten the drawing, and you cannot see as much details. I take the photo in the daytime, in natural lighting, on the floor in front of a window, careful NOT to put it directly in the sun. After I take several shots, I upload them; pick the best one, which is usually the one where my name and date are IN FOCUS. Then I crop out the borders, and I also REMOVE the SATURATION, which removes any color that the camera picked up, turning it back to pure black and white. THEN I use a feature called Auto Enhance, which lightens it up and makes it look as close to the drawing as possible.

j) I NEVER show someone the photo next to my drawing, no matter how much it looks like the photo, because then it becomes a challenge for someone to see how many mistakes someone can find, and it takes away from the drawing.

k) The brain can be fooled to believing that what it THINKS it sees is real. One of the best illustrations of that is when I noticed that blurry, out of focus backgrounds, in some portraits, made it look like a photo.

Hope this helps my fellow artists!!!
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reorganize the body
my artillery is a hall full of dancers
because to avoid death the ocean divides itself
and divides itself

until she's a shadow full of rooms
or eventually even the acid and the earthquake

But we've imagined this backwards.

the elephant's battered radiation talks all prophets from the building

Upon the stockpile mouths flood dry
and so many cardinals
of that hollow universe
pour on

And so what, auction the wind
she says.

After, no one will be left to speak

and I laugh because the same parts divide us

For the machine:
I hang these plane crashes from your clotheslines
Crack sprinkle
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Streets of Gold
"You're way too young to fall apart...„
Chapter 4

The house was empty. Quiet. Dark.
Just how I liked it.

But I trusted Tom on his word, he'd be back. I know he would be. He doesn't seem like the kind of guy to let you into his heart then forget you... He seems different. In a good, kind way. Not the bad, bitchy, douche bag way. If he was like that, I wouldn't even have gotten near him, much less kissed him.
Hell, did I really kiss him? A boy? I've never even kissed a girl! But a boy? My God... I've changed too much just by meeting him.

I sighed deeply and sat down in front of the couch – yeah, you heard me. In front of it. I stared down at the floor for the longest time. What was I thinking when I asked him over? What the hell was I even letting run through my damn mind. Ugh... But what if I was right, what I thought of last night? What if he is cheating on someone, with me? Of all people in Germany, Europe, the WORLD. Me? Why me? Am I that special? Am I really needed by someone that much; that they feel the need to cheat on them, with me? Crazy, that's so crazy. Nobody likes me that much, not a soul does. I have a face only a mother could love, nobody else does. I'm hideous. I'm creepy. I'm scary. I'm weird.

I'm so different from Society.

My hand twitched, as it does when I'm too deep in thought. Way too deep; I'm a thinker, a dreamer, not a maker, a creator. I'm a nobody. I'm Bill. Bill Kaulitz.

Wait... What the fuck was his last name? Shit! Did he even tell me? I don't even think I told him mine... Ugh. I'm such a fucking retard.

"Biiiillllll,„ a voice called from behind my front door. "Billiam, you in there?„ then a knock. I got up quickly and swung the door open, only to be tackled by a heavy Gustav. "Hey Bill! Long time no see, eh?„

I squirmed slightly under his weight, him being more then 50 pounds heavier then me. "Yeah.. It's been a while.„

"It has! Where you been? What happened? Anything new?„ he asked while he crawled off of me and sat upright on the floor, in front of me. "I haven't been anywhere... And nothing really happened. I met someone last night,„ shut up voice. "And nothing is really 'new.'„ Gustav's eyes lit up with enlightenment. "Oooh who are they?! What's their name? Is she hot or what?„ he beamed at me. I looked up at him, sitting myself up. "Well...„ I started "He's okay looking, I guess..-„ "He?!„ Gustav leaned towards me as if I was insane, he had that look about his face that said it all; shocked and wanting to know more. "Yeah.. he. His name's Tom... I don't know his last name though.„
"Well how did you come to meet him? Or do you know him already?„ I hesitated. "Well he really kind of approached me when I was standing outside that gas station down the street. Weird, eh?„ I looked at him with an eyebrow raised slightly. Gustav leaned back so he wasn't so close to me anymore. His face still had a quite clear look on it, as before. "Yeah... Did he try anything? Do I have to beat his ass?„

Gustav, I thought, You're too over protective of me.

"No, Gus, you don't have to 'beat his ass.' He said he'll be back, sometime...„


"A few days, a week maybe.„

"Oh... Okay.„
Gustav peered down at the floor for a second before standing up. He held his hand out to me, as an offer to pull me up too. I grabbed his hand and he jerked me up off the floor to standing. "So how's everything been, besides what you said already?„ "Good, I guess.„ "Did you.. Draw anything else?„

Yeah, I lied to Tom. I can draw better then anyone I knew in high school. I just kept it quiet.

I lingered over what words to say next. "...Yeah. I did actually. I'll show you.„ I grabbed one of Gustav's hands and pulled him into the back room, to the small closet in the corner. I slid one of the doors open and knelt down on the floor, crawling back into a small space under the shelves. I felt around in the dark for the sketchbook I had laying on the floor until one of my hands ran onto the smooth, cold surface of the top cover. I pulled it out from under the shelf, sitting up. Gustav had already sat down next to me. "Who is it this time? Just someone you thought up? Me again? Or one of your parents?„ he watched my hands slowly lift the cover up and over, flipping through pages of portraits and scenarios, charcoal drawn and pencil, pastel and light paints, this and that from page to page.

"You'll see.„ silence possessed us then.

My hands started to tremble looking through all of them, though, because I did draw a lot of pictures of my parents. Black and white sketches, detailed pencil and charcoal portraits, things like that. I had canvases with paintings on them slid under the same shelf all my other work was under, just to make sure I knew where they all were.

I stopped at one specific page, where the lightly drawn portrait of a boy stood alone on the page. I held it out to Gustav. "This... This one.„ I said the words slowly, as he took the drawing from my hands. He peered at it, from every angle, trying to get good light on it. He looked up at me after about five minutes, I looked back. I read his expression, yet again. Confused and slightly dumbfounded; a small hint of amazement in there.

"Billiam...„ he started.


"....Did you draw yourself as a child?„

I stared at him, long and weak. I did. I drew myself for the first time. A sick, horrible attempt it is. I know. But I chose one specific picture for it, one from when I was only 6 years old. The facial expression fit how I was feeling at the time I drew it, a few days ago. Deep and detailed, thoughtful, with a small crease of a frown in the brows that were drawn together, and on the forehead. Eyes slightly black, appearing from the picture, heavily shaded with the black rings of makeup, that yes, I wore at age six. Jet black hair, spiked in all different ways, shaggy and un-kept, slightly styled with hairspray. I didn't like it, one because I didn't take time to really finish it, and two because I don't like myself from back then. I was dumb, young, ugly, and just down right idiotic.

"Yeah..„ I said after a while. Gustav peered down at the drawing again before I slid it out of his hands, closing the cover of the sketchbook. He then looked up at me. "Why?„

"Because I felt like I looked in that picture.„

"Billiam... tell me what happened.„
Gustav sighed slightly as he said that. I looked at him, frowning a bit. "Nothing happened. I just felt down and wanted to draw that... is it bad?„ Gustav shook his head. "No it isn't. But Bill you've changed. A little too much.„

I glared at Gustav, hard. "How dare you say I've changed. I've been the same since I was born, don't even say I'm different.„ Gustav frowned slightly, standing up. "Well I wont then, even though it's true.„ he walked back across my apartment and I followed. "Where do you think you're going?„ he looked back at me. "Oh, I'm leaving. I don't want to disturb you anymore. Sorry, Bill. Didn't mean to.„
He pulled the door open and left.

"Stupid bitch.„ I muttered as I went back and sat down on my smaller couch. He was weird. Automatic, more like. I don't know, I never had the right words for anything.

Now, nothing to do again.

I looked around mindfully on what to do. Draw, maybe? While I'm alone. Go somewhere, maybe finally go talk to one of the people who lives around me. Bah. They don't want anything to do with me so I wont bother them.


Days passed. Weeks.

A month and a half, to be exact. I hadn't gotten contact from anyone. Not Tom, not Gustav, nobody. Absolutely nobody. I got fired from where I worked, now all I had left was the fund I had in my savings account in the bank.

I knew this would happen.

My house was just how it had been the day after Tom left. Everything in the same spot, I didn't even move much around. I wanted everything exactly the same as it had been. I don't know, I just wanted it to look the same, exact same, as it had when he left. I'm just a creep like that.

I didn't try to call anyone, I waited for them. But what if nobody ever called? Or tried to contact me? I don't know. I don't know anything.

I laid back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. The white, empty, cold ceiling, staring straight back at me. I had nothing to do, nowhere to go, again. Actually, it's been like this for a long time. I didn't mind though.

Hell, I didn't seem to mind about anything. Heh, I was dumb that way.

Every so often I would look out one of my windows like a creepy stalker. I dunno. Waiting for Tom to show himself again, I guess. Maybe he forgot me, maybe he didn't, maybe he was just a fag, maybe not. Who knows. I don't, that's for damn sure.

I kept my focus back on the ceiling, I was still laying on my bed. It's too blank, I though. This room needs some life.

I got up, looking over to the corner where my closet was. Should I? Or should I not... I don't know. I got up, opening the door to my closet. I slid four buckets, sealed, full of paint. One neon green, one bright and vibrant red, one electric blue, the last one was just brown. I had others, but I didn't feel like reaching for them. I crossed my legs and reached for the screw driver in which I pried open the lids with. The colours stood out fantastically against the white background of my floor as I looked down into each bucket, rim-full with the designated colour. I also got out a set of brushes, large, medium, small, each with a different texture of them. I looked back over to my walls and ceiling, which had nothing on them. Bare, clean, boring white. Bright. It was too much, my OCD for making anything look like art had been building up since I moved here, it's so empty in here. I hate it. It makes me wanna take all the paint I have and throw it on everything naked of colours.

I know, I'm weird that way. An OCD of "Art„ isn't exactly so normal.

I picked up the paint buckets, two in each hand, taking them over to the first wall. The one that had not a single thing touching it. I looked down at the red, cautiously and slowly dipping the medium-light-texture brush down into it, slowly pulling it back out and looking back up at the wall. I didn't need a basis for where to start, I just knew. I dragged the brush with paint on it across the wall for about four feet, making the line curved down slightly. This made me smile. I did the same, one line above the other, none of them touching, for the next colours. And it was a pattern, red then blue then green then brown. Red then blue then green then brown. To the ceiling and down to the floor. Up the whole wall in front of me. Then, having that part finished, I dragged out the next few colours. Yellow, white, orange, and black. I did the same, but instead of making them next to the original lines, I made them go over them. Only, the second ones, went down the wall instead of across. I did this about 12 times, making them layer up on each one and another, making them thicker and thicker each time. Soon enough, I had the whole one wall covered with colour. In a criss-cross pattern, one set across or over the other. But I didn't use the white, not yet.

I'm saving the white for the effects.

I picked up the smallest brush, dipping it into the black and staring at the wall I had been focused on for hours. "What to do, what to do next...„ I crossed my arms, holding the wooden part of the brush between my teeth. This is what an artist should do. Not keep himself hidden in the fears of embarrassment all the time.

I got it.

I had a perfect idea. I painted the outline of a circle, in black. Thin, delicate, black lines. Then, the inner part of the circle. Same black lines, only on the inner part of the circle. Then, inside that circle, I drew a straight column. Then a sideways column on top of that one, like a block letter of a "T.„ I tilted my head slightly as I did so, just so it didn't come out looking squiggly. Then under the first sideways column, I did another, only smaller and a little further down. Then under that I did the same as I had on top. Same size, same shape. Just under the smaller one. Now that I had that, I painted the lines around the outside. The effects. It made it look like it was literally "Smashing through the wall.„ but, around the inside of the circles and the symbol, I covered up the original pattern colours with white. I finished up the effects of the area around the circles and symbol and stepped back a little to see it all. Perfectly in line... I thought to myself. Now to paint it black.  

This all humored me. I'm not quite sure why, but this just made me happier.

I took the black paint bucket and studied the wall once more. I still needed to make it a lot more different. More effects.

I dipped the large brush in the paint and filled in the empty circles, the symbol, and used the smaller brush to make it look like it was smashed in some parts. I covered up part of the circle on the left with white, then took black and made it look like part of it was actually "Falling out„ for lack of better words. It looked kind of three-dimensional. I intended for it to look like that. I set the paintbrush down and stepped back to examine my final work. Goddamn...

It looks too perfect. My eyes shifted down to the bottom though. I picked up the smallest brush again and painted my name in black. Cursive, perfect black cursive. Right under the symbol. The whole thing topped off with the "Bill Kaulitz„ at the bottom of it. I don't know, it just did.

I loved it.

All of a sudden, I heard a knock on the front door. I looked at the paint-covered watch on my wrist. Fuck. Seven hours? Damn! Took a while. But who the fuck could that be at 12 midnight?

I ran down the hallway to the front door, opening it.

Tom beamed at me, his face looking at appalled as ever. I looked just as surprised.

He looked me up and down. "Uhm...„ he was staring at my hands. "Why are you..-„

"No reason. Just taking care of a few things. Come on in, Tom.„ I said, smiling and standing away from the door. He smiled back, walking past me and inside. He wasn't wearing a coat, much less a long sleeved shirt. Just simple pants and a tee-shirt. "So how have you been?„ he looked over at me as I closed the door. I looked back at him. "I've been okay. Actually, I've been way better. Getting fired and all-„

"What? How?„

"Long story.„
I sat down on the couch and looked down at my hands. They were splattered with every colour of paint I had. Tom sat next to me, also looking at my hands. "What were you doing? With... Paint, I mean.„ his expression seemed empty, like he didn't know me. Bitch. I looked up at him. "Oh.. Hm? Nothing. It's just paint- ...That's all.„

"You were doing something, Bill.„

"Just drop it. Where the hell have you even been? You broke your promise and I'm not happy about that.„ my mood changed completely as I choked those words out. Tom looked at me in utter disbelief, his brows pushed together slightly forming a frown. "What do you mean, 'Where have you been?' I've been at work where I said I was.„ I grunted after he said that. "You said, what, a week at the most? Two. Okay, two. How long ago was that? Oh, right, a month and a half, Tom! A month and a fucking half!„ I raised my voice slightly and shot up from where I was sitting, still staring down at Tom. He stood up also. "It's not like I'm your fucking boyfriend Bill! I barely fucking know you! Just back off, okay? Back the hell off.„


"Desperate faggot.„

That crossed the line.
I pulled my arm back and back-handed Tom as hard as I could have. "LOOK WHO'S TALKING, ONE-NIGHT-STAND PLAYING BITCH!!„ I shouted as I kept my eyes set to kill on Tom's. His jaw had dropped, his hand over where I slapped him.

Oh Lord...

What had I just done.

Hope you like :D

*Cover picture made by :iconhilf--mir--fliegen:*
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It was a Saturday night and Emily, was of course, sitting in front of the TV. Her favorite program was on, Saturday Night Live. Tears welled up in her eyes as she realized it was another lonely night, without John. The lads had been on tour. She missed her silly mop topped man. She grabbed a pillow and held it to her chest. It seems as though the usually hilarious show wasn't working at all. Tears started to roll and she wondered how many more nights John was going to be away. The tour was supposed to be over two weeks ago. But you know, weather, fans, things just happen.
The next thing Emily knew was that it was 3:00 in the morning, and she had fallen asleep on the couch. She got up and turned off the TV and headed into her bedroom, crawling into bed. Despite her recent sleepiness, She just couldn't fall asleep. She thought about John calling her Em. He always called her Em. Then she thought of his laugh. She just couldn't sleep. Emily gave up. She crawled out of bed and went into the kitchen. She grabbed the soup can and pulled out the pot. "Soup." She said through the sniffs. "I want soup." She made the soup and sat down in the living room, in the dark, and ate it. It was nearing 4:00 and she was beginning to get droopy eyed. "John." She whispered. "When the bloody hell are you coming home?"
As if to answer her question, a couple minutes later, the doorknob turned and in walked John. "John!" Emily squealed and jumped up. John dropped his bags and ran to her with open arms. John held her close and took a deep breath.
"Oh Em." He sighed. "Oh my sweet Em." They both were crying. When they sat down, John grabbed her soup. He dipped the spoon and collected some noodles. Then he took the handle end and put if in his mouth. He put it towards Emily who laughed and gladly sipped it up.
"Weird way to eat soup..." She laughed.
"Great way to start making love!" John kissed her. "Besides! You think I'm weird for feeding you soup....Your eating soup at four in the morning!" John pulled Emily on his lap. She glared at him.
"I missed you." She whispered. John started unbuttoning his shirt.
"I missed you too, baby."
A little story for :iconkoffee12345:!!!! Just for being a really nice/cool person. lol I hope you like it girl!!!!!!
I don't own the photo or John....or the spoon!
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~~~~~1 week later~~~~

"Whoa, D! That's a lot of food." Russel gawked at the table covered in breakfast food. The singer, blowing on his pancakes, looked up at the drummer. "Oh, ello."  Russel walked over to the table and sat down. "Yo, you're eatin' quite a bit of food, this mornin'." 2D blinked at him and looked down at his plate. "Well...I-Um...OH! Hi, Muds!" The bluenette waved at the bassist walking into the kitchen. "Hey..'D." He lazily waved back, heading for the fridge, then looked over at the table. "Holy bollocks! Ya think ya got enough food there, mate?" 2D frowned. "It isn' dat much food." Murdoc scoffed. "Russel doesn't even eat that much, 2D." Hurt showed on the singer's face. "Yer callin' meh fat, den?" Murdoc's smile faded. "Wait, no! Yer as skinny as a twig!" The singer pushes away his plate and got up from his chair, only to be pushed back down by Murdoc. "Jus' eat..." Russel shook his head and grabbed a bag of chips, heading back to his room. Looking to make sure they are alone, Murdoc leans down and kisses 2D's forehead. "Ya can' be so sensitive, luv." 2D grinned at the Satanist's kindness. "Anovah one." He tilts his head up. Murdoc smiled and placed a kiss on his lips. "Mmmm." The singer grinned widely as soon as Murdoc pulled back. "I love ya." Without hesitation, Murdoc returned the smile. "Love ya too." Heavy footsteps interrupted their moment, making Murdoc pulled away from 2D and head to the fridge, pretending to argue with the singer. "I told yew! All those special effects are cheesy!" 2D gladly played the game, watching Russel appear back into the kitchen. "Forgot my dip." 2D was too concentrated on Murdoc to hear the drummer. "Dey are not! Da special effects are wot make da movie, Muds!" Getting caught in the middle of the 'arguement', Russel groaned. "Are you two still arguin' about that zombie shit? Just let it go, man." Before either of the two men who answer, Russel was out the door, on his way back to his room. 2D smirked and turned his gaze to the Satanist. "Ya do realize dat we 'ave to tell dem sooner or later..." Murdoc just grunted as a response, walking back over the 2D. "I dunno, Stu.." He squeezes the singer's shoulders gently.

"Damn it!" The bassist yelled at himself, pacing the floors of his Winnebago. "When am I gonna do it?!" He growled angrily, looking back to the package on his table. "When?" His expression change from anger to fear as he heard a knock on his door. "'old on!" He quickly took the package and shoved it in a cupboard. As soon as he faced the door, it opened and 2D stepped in, happy as can be. "'ello Murdoc." The Satanist smiled nervously at the singer, watching him approach. Before he knew it, 2D began kissing him gently, nudging him towards the couch. Obeying his hint, Murdoc grabbed 2D's arm and plopped down on the couch, bringing the singer on top of him. Giggles escaped the vocalist as he began kissing the older man's neck. A few moments after, the bluenette was sliding his tongue into Murdoc's mouth. "Mmm." The Satanist had his mind on other things though, and 2D instantly knew. Pulling away, he looked at Murdoc. "Muds, is everyfin' awroight?" Snapping back into focus, Murdoc nodded at the singer. "Yeah, just got a few things on my mind." Curiosity filled the singer. "Wot fings?" His grin was almost irresistable. "Secret things, luv." This made 2D frown. "Why can' ya tell meh?" Murdoc, giving 2D a kiss on the cheek, reassured him. "You'll know soon enough." The two stared at each other for what seemed like hours when 2D finally yawned. "Awroight...I fink I should go to bed now, 'm tired." Murdoc smirked and held onto the singer.  "Yew can sleep 'ere...I plan to have a band meeting tomorrow anyway.." Snuggling close to Murdoc, 2D nodded. "Ok..." Closing his eyes slowly, the singer drifted off to sleep, leaving the Satanist to think of his plan. "Tomorrow...I'm doin' it.." He watched as 2D's chest rose and fell with each breath. "I really do love 'im." Soon, the Satanist also dozed off to sleep, his dreams filled with confusion and paths.

~~~~~~Next Day In the Studio~~~~~

2D sat patiently on one of the couches in the Studio kitchen, wondering why they were having a band meeting so suddenly. To him it didn't make much sense, he hoped Murdoc wasn't planning something Satanic. Before long, Noodle was also in the Studio, dragging Russel in as well. "Russel-sama! Sit on couch!" She demanded the beefy drummer to the couch across from 2D. "A'ight, chill baby girl." He gently pet her on the helmet, enjoying her confidence. "Hai. Um..Watashi-tachi wa koko de nanidesu ka?" Russel took a moment to translate her. "I'm not too sure, Noods. Muds's always doin' shit." She looked up at the drummer and blinked, wondering what he means. 2D watched both of them talk while he waited for the bassist to come in. "Where is 'e?" Looking to the doorway, he imagined Murdoc walking into the Studio, in all his Satanic glory. But, no such luck. Feeling a tug on his shirt, 2D turned his head to see Noodle smiling at him. "Oh, 'ello Noodle." He gave her a quick pat on the helmet, looking back at the doorway, seeing Murdoc turn into the Studio. "It's about damn time, man!" Russel shouted from across the room. Murdoc answered with a witty but always effective comeback. "Shut yer face, lardass!" Before the fight could get anymore out of hand, 2D dragged Murdoc down onto the couch. "Stop, yer gonna get 'urt. Ya know very well Russel can kick yer arse." The bassist grunted lowly, sinking into the couch. "So, What's goin' on, man? Why are we all here?" The drummer asked sitting back down. This reminder made Murdoc stand back up. "Oh yes...I called yew lot here for an important reason-" Russel cut him off quickly. "If it's about how ya worked that riff yesterday, just stop." 2D rolled his eyes. "Why da 'ell would 'e bring that up now?" Murdoc cleared his throat. "Can I go on? Thanks."

After getting everyone calmed down and concentrated, Murdoc quickly explained. "This like any other band meeting, this is going to be quite different." He was pacing nervously in front of 2D, wondering how to do this. "Ok. I'll just be straight forward about this..." He gestured for 2D to stand up. 2d hesitated for a bit, but soon is on his feet, walking to Murdoc slowly. The Satanist quickly wrapped an arm around the singer shoulders, bringing him closer. The other two band mates stared at them, wondering what was going on.  Murdoc looked from the Russel and Noodle to 2D. Finally making his decision, he leaned a bit closer to 2D, their lips gently touching. "Mmm!" 2D grunted in surprise from the kiss, concerned about what Russel and Noodle would think. When he pulled back, 2D was blushing a light pink, staring at the drummer, reading his expression. All he could see was shock, on both of their faces. Noodle's  expression was the best, for she was hardly ever fazed by anything. When Murdoc finally faced the seated band members, his heart was beating quickly. "Yeah, believe it." It seem like hours of silence before Russel finally spoke. "How long..." 2D jumped in on this one. "Almost two months." He beamed at the drummer.  "But...why are you tellin' us this, man?"  Pushing 2D behind him, Murdoc stepped up to the drummer. "I have reasons." Barely able to contain his excitement about it anymore, 2D hugged Murdoc tightly, facing the others. "And 'm 'avin' a baby!" Silence, once again, filled the room, untill Russel started to laugh. "'D, Ya high or somethin'?"  Murdoc, rubbing the bridge of his damaged nose, looked up into the singer's eyeholes. "I told yew, they ain' gonna believe it." Feeling completely stupid and embarrassed, 2D began walking away, only to be caught by the arm. "Murdoc...let go." He shook his head. "Still got one more thing to do, luv." The ability to call him 'luv' in front of everyone seemed to give him much more confidence. "alright, ya been meh singer fer a long time, I know ya up and down and even though I yell at ya every now and then-" Noodle interrupted. "And beat him." Groaning, he continued. "Even though we have those downsides...I love ya..."  Quickly he got down on one knee, digging in his jacket pocket, pulling out a box. "So...Stuart Pot.." He slowly opened the box, revealing a diamond ring. "W-Will ya marry me?" He felt himself grow cold instantly, wondering if this was a good idea. Everyone remained quiet, not wanting to be the first to speak.

Finally after a long, hesitant silence, 2D took a step towards Murdoc, leaning down and wrapping his arms around him tightly. "Yes!" The words couldn't have come out any happier. Heat flowed back into Murdoc's body, allowing him to breath normally again. Taking the ring from the box, he placed it on 2D's ring finger.  Tear flowed down the singer's cheek. "I love you, Muds." He hugged him tightly. Murdoc looked back at Russel, seeing his shocked expression made him laugh out loud. All the while, Noodle turned her head to Russel. "Russel-sama. Is this the weirdest thing that can happen?" He nods slowly, getting up off the couch. Not quite used to it, he watched the two kiss passionately, doing so made his stomach churn "Well...congratulations...I guess. Good luck and all that. I've got a headache'm leaving." Noodle nodded at the two and headed off back to her room, leaving the lovers alone. 2D smiled tenderly. "Fank you, for lovin' meh." Murdoc couldn't help but smile back, nodding. "It wos easier than I thought." With that said, he walked towards the lift with 2D, arm in arm.
I sure hope that it isn't too sappy.

I tried and it's late! D:<
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How long had it been? Three months? Three, almost four months since 2D left Kong studios. The whole place wasn't the same at all without the blue haired singer. He was a part of the place. He was a part of the band. He was a big part of their FAMILY. None of the band members had the feeling to do anything. Noodle had spent the most of her time by looking out through the window like a puppy that waited for its owner to come home and play with it. She had waited like crazy for several hours every day for the singer to come back. Sometimes when she wasn't looking through the window every fifth minute she used to walk into the singer room and lay down on his bed. She used to fall asleep there and later the drummer had to come and pick her up and carry her back to her own room. Russel felt horrible to see the poor girl suffer like that. He had tried his best to make Noodle feel better. He always used to walk up to her and ask her how she felt and suggested different things they could do together. Last week she had been sitting on the floor in the lobby in front of the door for almost 6 hours without moving. Russel had walked up to her and tapped her shoulder.

Russel: Hey baby girl. Don't you wanna play some video games?

Noodle: *shook's her head* no…

Russel: I know! Why won't we drive into the town and try out that new sushi bar.

Noodle: Not hungry…

Russel: Noodle. I'm sorry to tell you this. But he has been gone for a long time and I don't think he's coming back.

Noodle: *Jumps up and glares at him in anger* HE IS COMING BACK! HE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME ALONE! WE ARE A FAMILY!

With that she had ran away to her room and locked the door. Russel had solaced her when she felt very bad and down. He could understand how she felt. He missed their singer too. The band hadn't done much at all in a while. No concert or shows. No playing or anything. Neither Russel nor Noodle had spoke to Murdoc for almost 2 months. After 2D left the bassist had locked himself up in his Winnebago and had stayed there for most of the time. The band had got the information where their singer was now. 2D had gone to France and had got the job as a model there. 2D had talked about that he wanted to be a model or an actor once. None of the three could understand why he wanted that but he seem to have successes. The band had found 2D's picture's in magazines and even on some stupid publicity for branded clothes. They had seen that already a mouth after 2D left. It seemed to go on well for their blue haired friend. When Murdoc had seen the first magazines he had ripped them in pieces and then burned them up. Noodle and Russel only sighed when the bassist go all crazy like hell. After that Murdoc locked himself up in his Winnebago and didn't come out. He drank and smoked like never before. He told himself that he was celebrating that he had got rid of the twerp. But he was actually mad at himself for letting the singer had gone so easy. It was now an afternoon around the grey building that now seemed even more desperate then before. Noodle and Russel walked down the stairs to the car park to see how Murdoc was doing. They hadn't seen him in a long while. They were lucky today, Murdoc hadn't locked his door. Russel opened the door to the Winnebago and let Noodle jump in first.

Noodle: Murdoc-san! Me and Russel-sama wondered if you-

Noodle went all silent when she felt a horrible smell. She sniffed and felt a disgusting feeling in her stomach. Russel could feel it too and looked around.

Noodle: Puueeww! What is that horrible smell!

Russel: Oh man! It smells like something died in here.

Murdoc: Yes… My career…

Noodle and Russel blinked and turned to see where the voice came from. The whole Winnebago looked like a junkyard. There were empty cans and bottles everywhere and most of the floor was covered in dirty clothes and other garbage. Noodle's and Russel's eyes fell on the couch were the bassist sat all drunk and half naked. He had some old unzipped jeans on him and held a half empty beer bottle in his right hand. He raised the bottle just like if he wassails. Russel sighed and shook his head slowly and Noodle slowly kicked some of the bottles and clothes out of her way. The bassist drank up the last liquid in the bottle and groaned. He shook the bottle a little to make sure that it was empty. Then he threw it right into the wall which made it brake into splinters. Russel glared at Murdoc who only chuckled back.

Murdoc: Isn't this just great!? Eh?

Russel: Look man! I know it's hard that D left. But you really gotta do something with your life.

Murdoc: WHAT LIFE? The music IS my life!

Russel: I know that…

Murdoc: *chuckles* Hehe… My singer just left! Just like all other of my other bands. Just
when you're on top *hick* Every…Everything just f-falls down!

Russel: Easy there man.

Murdoc: He just left to go to the land of gayness! France… FRANCE! Just to become a model. A BLOODY MODEL!

Russel: *sighs*

Noodle kicked some more of the garbage out of her way. As she just kicked some old landury out of her way a suffering croaking was heard. Noodle flinched when she saw poor Cortez jumping out from under the giant pile of clothes. Cortez flew and jumped around on the floor to get rid of a sock that covered his head. Noodle Kneeled down and picked up the bird in her arms. She pulled off the sock from Cortez head and he croaked and shook his head.

Noodle: Poor Birdy…

Murdoc: Ohh look! There was the little sod!

Noodle: How could you let Cortez drown in junk!?

Murdoc: Why would I care!? *hick*

Noodle: You're disgusting Murdoc-san!

Murdoc didn't care about the little girl and grabbed another beer bottle that stood on the table. He took a sip and groaned. Russel shook his head and looked around the room.

Russel: Man! This place looks like a junkyard!

Murdoc: I know! Nice right! Hehe…

Noodle: …

Russel then noticed a magazine on the floor. It wasn't just any magazine at all. It was a French fashion magazine! And who was on the cover together with two young girl models. 2D of course. He wore a dark blue outfit with the girls had small tiny dresses. It seemed to be some kind of summer collection or something like that. Russel onlt shook his head. He didn't know anything about fashion and that crap. He just thought that the black hat 2D wore didn't matched the pants he wore at all. He gave Noodle the magazine and looked at the bassist. Murdoc had just finished his beer bottle and threw it to the floor.

Russel: I thought you hated to see what D have become.

Murdoc: Of course I do!

Russel: Then why do you have Magazines with him in your Winnebago?

Murdoc: None of your bloody business!

Russel: If you miss him that much just call him.

Murdoc: I don't miss that dullard!

Russel: Yeah right! Is that why you glares at his picture all the time?

Murdoc: Shut up…

Russel spotted Murdoc's cell phone on the table. He grabbed it and looked at Murdoc who didn't seem to care at all.

Russel: You know if he changed his number?

Murdoc: *shook's his head*

Russel: Then call him!

Murdoc: I had already tried before and he just hangs up when he hears my voice.

Russel: I'm not surprised. But try!

Murdoc growled and grabbed the phone. He slowly typed in 2D's phone number and pressed on the green button. He waited a while as he heard the signal from the phone. Russel and Noodle looked at the bassist and waited. Murdoc glared back at them. Suddenly he heard the signal stop and a familiar voice he hadn't heard for a long time was heard on the line.

2D: Ello?

Murdoc: umm… It's Murdoc.

2D quickly hanged up. Murdoc growled and threw the phone hard into the floor. It didn't break at least.

Murdoc: SEE!?

Russel: *sighs*

Noodle picked up the phone and typed in 2D's number again. She then pressed the button and waited. She waited until 2D answered again.

2D: Let me be Murdoc!

Noodle: 2D-kun!? It's me!

2D: Noodle!? Oh god I'm sorry!

Noodle: 2D-kun… I miss you so much.

2D: Noodle. I'm so sorry. I miss you too.

Noodle: How is it in France?

2D: It's okay. How's it at Kong?

Noodle: It's Hor-

Murdoc: *take's the phone from Noodle's hands* Its great here Face ache! We're having a great time here you know, it's party time 24 hours at this place.

2D: Sounds nice for you then…

Noodle: *jumps up and down beside Murdoc* Don't listen to him 2D-kun! He's lying!

Murdoc: *push her away* as I said only parties. I bet there in France you can't do anything else than sit on your skinny ass and eat cheese and grapes!

2D: Actually. It's great here! I finally got some people around me who actually appreciate my work!

Murdoc: Oh really!?

2D: Yeah! And I really like it here! How's it going with the band?

Murdoc: It's going great!

2D: Really? You got a new singer yet?

Murdoc: We don't need a new bloody singer. In fact we don't need a singer at all! We're doing great without you!

2D: GOOD! Because I have never felt better in my whole life to get rid of you!

Murdoc: Look who's talking!

2D: Tell the other's I said "Hi"! HAVE A GREAT LIFE YOU BASTARD!



Murdoc: FINE!

2D and Murdoc hanged up at the same time. The both of them sighed and said together at the same time.

Murdoc & 2D: He doesn't even miss me…

Noodle and Russel blinked at the bassist. He sighed and crossed his arms.

Noodle: *sighs*

Russel: Don't worry baby girl. Things will be okay.

Murdoc: OH SHUT UP RUSSEL! You know that 2D will never come back! He's gone. HEY NOODS! You heard that? HE'S GONE FOREVER!


Noodle cried hard and ran out of the Winnebago. Russel sighed and rubbed his neck. Murdoc groaned and kicked some old clothes out of his way.

Murdoc: Sweet Satan that she has to be so sensitive!

Russel: Smart move man! You just had to do that didn't you!?

Murdoc: What?

Russel: Do you know how much baby girl misses D!? They're like siblings dammit! She's depressed without him!

Murdoc: Boohoo then…

Russel: You're incredible…

Russel noticed at least five more magazines on the floor that was almost the same as the other. There were French fashion magazines with 2D on the cover, all in different clothes. Russel walked up to them and picked them up. Murdoc flinched and glared at the drummer.

Murdoc: Let them be!

Russel: *drops them and shook's his head* Do as you wish with them.

Russel walked out of the Winnebago and left Murdoc alone. Murdoc glared at the Magazine with 2D on the cover of it. He picked it up and growled. Why had 2D left his band? Why had he left HIM? Murdoc threw the magazine on the floor again and stared up in the ceiling. He suddenly felt a pressure on his shoulder and looked up. It was Cortez who glared at him. Murdoc blinked at the bird.

Murdoc: What do you want?

Cortez: KRAHH!


Murdoc got up from the couch and chased Cortez around in the Winnebago. Wasn't it enough that 2D had left and his other band members were mad at him? Of course not, he just needed to have a bird teasing him all the fucking time.  Noodle cried hard as she ran down to 2D's room. She opened the door and then closed it hard with a slam. She pressed her teeth together and clutched her fists hard. She was sad, angry and heartbroken at the same time. The poor little Asian girl looked around the empty room and sobbed. There still were lots of 2D's things left but yet not. Noodle walked up to the singer's bed and crawled up in it. She hugged the pillow hard against her little chest and sobbed harder. The poor girl couldn't stand thinking about that her big brother was gone. It sure was a while ago since he left the grey and boring building but it didn't turned out better for that at all. Noodle closed her eyes and imaged a picture of the band singer. She saw every detail of him in her head. His deep and black hole eyes that always seemed to be filled with love. His toothless smile that both irritated and cheered people up all the time. The way he dressed and his way to act. His blue spiky hair that actually were kind of soft to touch and of course his voice. She could never forget how he sang or spoke to her. Noodle growled and threw the pillow on the floor and kicked it away. Then she stomped her foot into the floor and wall hard. She sobbed and pulled her hair. Why had he left? Was it her? Was it Murdoc or Russel? Was it the band? Or was it maybe the FAMILY? Noodle knew it was something between 2D and Murdoc that had started everything but still it maybe was something else. Noodle calmed down and sat down on the bed. Tears ran down her cheeks and dripped down in her lap. She didn't bother at all about it. She sobbed again and lifted up her heavy feeling head. She looked around the room a final time before she sighed quietly.

Noodle: Why… 2D-kun! WHY!

2D's eyes shot open just as if he had heard the little girl's words in his head. He blinked slowly and looked over at the balcony. The big balcony door's were open and showed him a beautiful view of Paris. 2D sat in his bed looking at some stupid pictures of a new collection he would pose for the next day. He lived in his own room in a special house for models together with a few other girls who also were models for the French fashion collection. 2D sighed and threw the pictures aside. This wasn't what he would have chosen at all but it was better than nothing. The singer quickly checked his cell phone if he maybe had got a new massage or something. When he saw that he hadn't got anything he frowned and put the phone into his pocket and walked out on the balcony instead. He picked up his pack of cigarettes and put one between his lips. He then lighted it with his lighter and inhaled the smoke from it. He sighed and looked out over the lighted up town. He could spot the Eiffel tower that was all lighted up in the night. He had to admit that it was a nice view to him. Still he thought that Big Ben in London was a little better than this. 2D took another deep puff from the cancer stick and stared up in the night sky. It was just as Paris lighted up, but by stars and not light. 2D sighed and thought about what the others did right now. He remembered that Murdoc had told him that they partied all the time since he left. 2D shook his head in anger. Why would he care anyway? He had left the band. He didn't need Murdoc to tell him what to do all the time. And he wouldn't stay here forever. After this stupid model job he would probably settle down somewhere else but not in France. He actually had grown tired of hearing those stupid French accents all the time and those model girls he always had to pose with. They were always shouting for makeup and screamed as fast as they broke a nail. 2D sighed deeply. He really missed Kong studios. He missed Noodle, Russel and most of all Murdoc. He knew that Murdoc didn't cared but still he did miss the green bassist. The singer finished his cigarette and walked back inside again. He sat down on the bed and checked his cell phone again. Maybe he should call them. 2D was just about to type in the number to Murdoc's cell phone when he suddenly stopped. He couldn't do it. He just couldn't! 2D laid the phone on the bed and walked into the bathroom to take a shower before bed. As the singer took his hot and relaxing shower he got a message on the phone. It was from the guitarist who had sent the quick message. On the phone a message was showed and said with big letters. "PLEASE COME HOME 2D-KUN!"

Chapter 18 XD

Wow this story went very long I must say... Oh anyway ^^
Enjoy this chapter. The chapters will get longer later because the story will soon near it's end. But it will be a few more chapters of course. Maybe just a little bit longer. Anyway. enjoy! Of of course some more fun with cortez XD



gorillaz (c) hewlett & albarn
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~~~~Big day~~~

2D was sleeping soundly in his room when he suddenly felt a shaking on his shoulder. "Uhn?"  What was that? WHO was that?!  "Wot?...'o?"  He didn't open his eyes.  "...Stop shakin' me!"   A giggle sounded and the shaking stopped. Noodle.  "Noodle-luv...wot're ya doin' in meh room?"  He rubbed his eyes sleepily.   The young guitarist smiled. "It's big day today, 2D-kun!" She started to pull him up from the bed.  "You must get ready!"  2D blinked several times, trying to make up fast enough. "Wot?!"   Was it really the day to get married?!  A giant smile showed on his face. "Woo!" He sat up straight, ignoring the small pain from the still healing gash in his stomach.  Noodle jumped back in surprise.
"2D-kun.  I help you with outfit, yes?"  The singer smiled and nodded. "Yeah...sure ya can , Noods." He got up off the bed and slowly went to his closet, his heart beating quickly.  2D opened the door and stared at the dress with awe. "..." Shakily, he reached for it and smiled wide. "I 'ope dis wedding goes well..."  A feeling in the pit of his stomach said differently. "Ah well..m'sure everyfing'll work out jus' fine...right Noodle-luv?"  She nodded and bowed, adjusting her radio helmet. "Go on and put dress on, I want to see, yes?"
The young Asian was so excited for 2D that she was hopping up and down.  2D watched her and chuckled. "Wot? Ya 'avin' a seizure over dere?"  He joked.  Noodle stopped bouncing and shook her head. "Am just excited to be...part of wedding, yes!"  Although, it confused her greatly that 2D wanted to wear a dress.  He was male after all.  But she decided to leave it alone.  It's what 2D wanted.  

The singer asked Noodle to step out while he stripped and redressed himself in his wedding gown. He turned to his full sized mirror and looked himself over.  His face was bright red, making the dress look even whiter on him. It was beautiful.  Almost too beautiful, making him feel slightly self conscious.  His mind went blank for a moment, and he stood there, staring at himself in the mirror.  The strapless dress seemed to glow around him. "..."  He didn't even move until his door opened and Noodle stepped back in. "2D?  I brought something for you, yes?""  She set a bag down on the singer's bed, pulling out some fake roses and white dress gloves.  "This came with your dress.  I found it out in the carpark."  Noodle had no idea how it had fallen and gotten away from the other stuff.  But, that didn't matter now.  The blue-haired singer blinked a few times and walked over, picking up the decorated bag and looking in it.  The only thing that was left was a rosey ponytail.  He smiled and took it, walking back over to his mirror and fixing his hair, using said ponytail.  After doing so, he turned and looked at his hair and smiled wider. "So pre'y!" 2D's hair was now in a bob, making it look professional.    Noodle nodded and game him a thumbs up. "Kawaii!"  Her shirt sleeves fell loosely on her arms.  She really liked to wear clothes that seemed 4 sizes too big.  The shorts fit perfectly on her, but her shirts always were too long and big.  That's what made her cute.  When she put her hands down, the sleeves covered her hands.
2D chuckled and went over to the bed, grabbing the gloves.  He got a glimpse at the clock on his bedside table and his eyes went wide. "11:00 A.M.?!"  What was Noodle thinking?! Why didn't she wake him up sooner?!  "Ya shoulda woke meh u' 'bou' free 'ours ago!" He was frantic in putting the gloves on and pinning the roses to his dress and hair. "Why va 'eck didn' ya wake me u' 'round 8?!"  Noodle smiled. "Russel and I  already set up  park for  wedding. There is no need  panic.  The food, drinks, and cake will...get there in time, yes?"  

The blue-haired singer blinked a few times, calming down. "Wai' an' Russel did va arrangin'?" This made his eyes water. "Oohh...fank you!" He wrapped his arms around the guitarist, getting a surprised, yet happy squeak from her. "It okay, 2D-kun!"   The singer got up and smiled as Noodle pet at the frills on his dress. "Pretty..."   Her English was enhancing greatly. " Mu'doc rea'y, yet?  I wanna see'im in 'is tuxedo!" He made a dash for the door, but was stopped by the young Asian's quick hand. "No. You cannot see him yet, yeah? It is rules!"  She smirked and pulled him back down to the bedroom. "I want do your making up, yes!"  She clapped and pulled 2D down to the bed and grabbed a few things from her pocket.  A container of blush,  eye shadow,  lipstick, and a small dash of glitter. "O-Oh...Noodle, da's no' really necessary...bu' fank ya, lovely..."  But, she was persistent and held him down with one hand. "I got this...for you! You wear!"  Noodle pouted and took out the blush, dabbing it with the brush, and slowly and gently, she added a tiny amount to 2D's cheeks.  It brought attention to his eyes.  But what didn't?  
Putting the blush up, she took out the eye shadow and sighed. "Close eyes." He did so as she brouth the eyeshadow brush to his eyes and gently added a bit of purple to his eyelids.  It only made his eyes even more noticeable, but that wasn't going to change, so there was nothing to worry about. The lipstick was brought out next and 2D opened his eyes. "Uhh...I fink I can do vis, fanks.."  The singer took the container of lipstick and stood up, going to the mirror.  And, taking his time, he added a small layer of red to his lips.  Rubbing his lips together, he made sure that it was evenly layered on each lip.  After doing so, he turned to the bed and saw Noodle with an opened container of glitter. "...Noods...I really don' fink I need dat..."  Again, he was ignored and Noodle flicked a few pinches of glitter on his dress.  "Pretty!"  

After getting dressed up, the singer smiled at himself in the mirror.  Damn, did he look like a girl.  His eyes flashed over to the calender and he realized something, making his face flush. "...Noodle...Ih's Valen'ine's Day..."  His arms dropped to his side and he squeaked. "I'm...gettin' married on Valen'ine's day!"  He hadn't realized that the wedding date was schedueled on a holiday.  Holy shit!  ""  Noodle smiled at him and went over to the crib in the corner of the singer's room. "Hallo, Lucinda-chan!"  She beamed at the now waking up child. "Nnm..." Lucinda opened up her and looked up at Noodle.
2D grinned and went to the bottom drawer of his dresser, pulling out a small pink dress. "'ere!"  Lucinda needed to dress up for the wedding too!  The bluenette walked over and Lucinda up.  She protested at the sudden movement and started whining. "Nn!!"   Why was she being moved?! She didn't want this!
2D set her back down and stripped her of her onesie and started to put the dress on her. "Shh. Sto' squirmin', luv."  The dress was put on after a bit of kicking from the infant.  
Then, 2D grabbed the baby dress shoes and put them on Lucinda's tiny feet. "Aww..."  The singer stopped and took them off. "Whoops...f'got the sockies!"  He giggled and went over to the closet, opening the tiny box in the back of it.  Pulling out some white socks, he went back over and put them on a squirming baby.
"Nn! 'ey! Stop vat!"  The socks and shoes were put on, but it was a hassle.  Lucinda was awake now and energetic.  Her legs kicked again as 2D started to get close, but he dodged and pulled her into his arms. "No. No' now, luv."  2D kissed her forehead and sighed. "I fink we're rea'y..."  The young guitarist had just stood there, watching the mother/daughter struggle. "Ok.  But I wait for Russel to call."


Murdoc's wake up call wasn't so lovely, however.  He was thrown off the bed after several gentle attempts by Russel.  And how he got into the Winnebago, I have no clue.  The bassist was dragged up off the floor and pulled into the bathroom.  Russel had forced him to take a shower and shave.  When that was done, the tuxedo was throw into the Satanist's face and the drummer walked into the living room to wait.
When Murdoc had gotten fully dressed, he was forced to comb his hair back nicely and cologne was dipped on him, causing the bassist to gag.
He was angry at Russel for forcing him to do this.
All of this took about an hour to do and Russel literally dragged the still angry Murdoc out of the Winnebago and threw him into the Geep.
"We still gotta get the rings from the shop, man." The drummer spoke around his cigar.  Murdoc grunted.  His way of saying. 'Whatever'
All he wanted to do was get the wedding over with and have his life with 2D and Lucinda.  This wedding was going to be awful, he could tell.
Something was going to happen.  His hair was bugging him to tears.  He hated showing his eyebrows, but if he messed with th hairdo, Russel would probably break his nose again. Best to keep it safe.

After 20 minutes of driving, the Geep arrived at the jewelry store.  Murdoc was the first to get out and walk in, while Russel struggled to get his heavy set body out of the vehicle.  When he finally got in, Murdoc was at the counter, talking to the owner and asking for his rings. Now.  He was antsy about the whole situation. And being in public in a tuxedo wasn't the best way to be discreet about getting married.  So, after getting the rings, the worked-up bassist rushed out and hopped into the passenger seat of the Geep.
Impatience seeped into him. "C'mon, lardass!!"  He growled out and tapped his long fingernails against the armrest.   Russel grunted in irritation and followed, getting into the Geep as fast as his body would allow. "Calm down, ya crackah ass..."  He sighed and drove in the direction of the park.
Once they arrived, Murdoc quickly got out and went over to the covered area.  "...This is where we're gonna have the food and shite, right?"  He placed a hand on one of the concrete tables.
The out-of-breath drummer nodded and sighed. "The food is being catered here now, man.  The guests'll arrive around 1:00.  And try not to fuck things up, Muds..."  The bassist blinked. "Who's all comin'?"   Russel stopped and though about it. "Uh...2D's parents...My friend Cynthia from the movie theatre...I think 2D's Aunt Rose...and that's about it, man."   Murdoc's eye twitched.  "A'fuck?!"  He stopped and took a deep breath. "2D's dad's comin'?!"  That was why Murdoc had a bad feeling.  David was going to fuck things up!!

Russel took a deep breath from his nose. "Just...stay here, okay?!  I gotta get  2D and me when everyone's here..."
He turned and rushed to the Geep and dialled Noodle's number.  "This is gonna be a looooong day..."


Noodle eagerly picked the phone up and smiled. "...Hm?  Oh.  Okay. Yes. I will."  She hung up and turned to 2D. "Russel-sama is on way.  Show me how play Pong."  She was told to stall for time. So, that is what she was going to do.    2D blinked and lifted his dress up a bit, walking over to the TV screens and turned them all on. "Okay...ya really wanna know 'ow to play"  He got a nod from the guitarist.  "Alrigh'..."  He took both controllers up and handed one to Noodle. "Vis is 'ow ya play.  Move dat fing up an' down an' try blockin' va ball comin' yer way..."  The singer moved his up and hit the whit dot, making it go towards Noodle's side.  She moved the stick up and down and missed it. Oh well.  Practice makes perfect. "Goo' try, luv."  
They played the game for what seemed like hours until finally the singer's door opened and Russel walked in. "You guys read--"  When he saw 2D, his eyes widened and he bit his lip to keep from laughing.  He looked ridiculous.  A man shouldn't wear something like that.  2D turned and lost the game. "Oh! 'ello Russ!"  He turned back and frowned. "Oi!" His eye twitched. "Chea'er..."  2D pouted at Noodle, who only grinned. "Hehehe."  

Both got up and followed Russel out of the room, jumping excitedly.  Lucinda was carried by 2D, looking around the excited group. "Mn?"  She blinked and looked at 2D's hair, wondering why it was put it like that.  Why was mommy so dressed up?  Where they going somewhere special?  Yep!
The singer got into the passenger side of the Geep while Noodle bounced into the back, gripping the bar in front of her.  "I am excited! Are you, 2D-kun?!"
He turned to her and smiled nervously. "Y-Yeah..."   Russel got in last and stuck the keys into the ignition and started the Geep, slowly driving out of the carpark and down the road.
Long travel.  It took almost 30 minutes to get to the park, but 2D preoccupied himself with playing with Lucinda.  He enjoyed hearing her giggle.  It just made him smile even more.  "Aww...aren' ya jus' a cu'ey..." 2D sighed happily.  "Soon...we'll be closer ven evah..." Lucinda giggled cutely and reached up for 2D's face.  But he pulled away.  "No'll 'ave to wai'..."  His headed lifted and he watched the trees rush by in a blur.  2D's main focus was on getting married...with Murdoc.  The realization sent chills up his spine.  The blue-haired singer was going to unite with the man who gave him the brain troubles he has now.  It seemed...weird.  

The snap of Russel's fingers brought 2D back into reality. "Huh?"  He turned his head from side to side, looking around.  The park.  "Wo'? Wo' is i'?"  2D blinks and turns to face Russel. "We're here, D..."  The singer's eyes widen and his cheeks turn pink. "Oh-Oh?"  He got out of the Geep, his white dress shoes clacking on the asphalt.  Almost falling, 2D clutched Lucinda tightly, but gasped as Russel took her away. "Uhn?"  Then the singer slowly calmed down.  Noodle took out a basket of flowers.  "Russel.  Are all guests here?"  She bounced on one foot in anticipation. "Nn!"  Russel shrugged and brought his phone out, making sure 2D didn't go past the opening into the park by put blocking the way.  When the phone was answered, the drummer's voice quiet and delicate. "Is everyone here?"  
Murdoc nodded. "Yep..Now they're all sittin' and waitin' am I..."  The bassist even sounded nervous.  His eyes darted to David every now and again.  The younger band member's father glared at the olive skinned man with pure hatred.  

The drummer closed the phone and walked over, taking 2D by the arm. "C'mon D."   The singer blushed, completely nervous and not ready. "N-No! Wai'!"    Russel sighed and let him down the walkway into the park.  Immediately, they saw Murdoc at the end, a look of shock on his face.  A few people turned as some music started to play.  The scene and music made 2D blush even brighter as he was led down the sidewalk towards Murdoc.
The bassist's eyes seemed gentle and he looked at 2D walking closer.  "...Stuart..."  
Noodle followed, throwing flower petals on  the ground, then she pulled the rings from the basket and smiled, handing them to Murdoc.
2D's heart raced as he looked around the area.  His mom, dad, and aunt were staring and watching.  Great.  When the singer saw the rings, he nearly squealed. "Eh!"   The big moment.
Slowly, one of the rings was popped out of the box.  No preaching, no ceremony, just a band of trust for each oher.  Seemed simple enough.  The gold band was just about to be placed on 2D's finger when a familiar voice broke out, angry. "I object to this marriage!"  All heads turned to face the back where David stood. "...Dad?"  2D whimpered and teared up. ""  

Rachel placed a hand on David's hand. "David! Stop!"  She hissed up at him.  He ignored her and stared at the couple at the farther end of the park.
"You! You have corrupted  my son's mind with all of yer trash! I will not except a homosexual in my family!!"  
The singer felt so embarrassed and slowly, the ring was removed, which made 2D gasp. "M-Mu'doc?!"  That was all he could take.
Running dow the walkway, 2D ran pat everyone and put his head in his hands, crying heavily.
His dad had to ruin EVERYTHING!!  The singer's make-up smeared as the tears rolled down. "Why?! Va's no' even fair!!"
They were about to get married! Then David had to speak up.

"Mh mh..." The bluenette whimpered in the corner until a hand rested on his shoulder. "Huh?"    He looked up and smiled wide, seeing Murdoc. "M-Mudsy!"  2D clung to him. "I-'m so sorry!!  Murdoc pet the singer's head. "Hey's ain' yer fault...yer dad's just an arse..."  
The bassist tilted forward and kissed 2D on the lips, slowly putting a small ring on 2D's finger, which caught 2D's attention. "Hm?"  Looking down, his smile widened. "I love ya, Mu'doc..."   He lifted his hand and looked at the new cold ring on his finger. "Muds..."  His lanky arms wrapped around Murdoc and he climbed to his feet, only to be picked up bridal styly by Murdoc. "W-Wo--"  Murdoc smirked. "We're skippin' the cake and snacks..."  The bassist purred into 2D's ear and carried him off towards the Geep. "We'll stay at a hotel fer a bit...jus' fer our honeymoon, how 'bout that?"
2D only giggled and nodded, wanting to be taken away.  
Russel and Noodle could get a lift from Rachel.

Murdoc and 2D had some 'business' to take care of.

This one is longer.
Marriage...sorta... XD

I was sleepy at the end.
I'm sorry. Hope you can understand.
If ANYBODY has a problem with reading it...just let me know...


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Ink Stains.

The ink stained your hands, coated your fingers. As you wrote you smiled, and I watched you peacefully. Sunlight filtered in through the window behind you, coming down through the leafy branches of a large tree that stood watch outside. It sparkled and gleamed in your hair, so beautiful. Were you warm, were you as comfortable as I was?

When you looked up at me your eyes were oh so pretty. Green and silver; I will not forget them. And you smiled. You had a lovely smile. Some times, it made me want to cry. But you looked happy then. Were you happy?

I just watched as you wrote that letter. A long letter to say that you were leaving, and maybe you wouldn't come back. Not this time. Not for a long time. You tried not to cry, and I had to look away when the tears began. I couldn't see you like that. You were so small, so thin. It really would have been too much…I guess I should have known then. I wish I had seen it… But you were okay then, you smiled and laughed. You said you loved me. And I said I would go with you, I would follow, as I watched.

No more tears came when you had sealed the envelope and placed it on the desk under the window, leaning against a vase of lilies. You told me they weren't pretty, they were ugly and you hated them. I didn't think they were so bad, but I didn't understand at that time. I do now. They were too like the rest of it, the room, the house, them. So you left the letter there, and came to me. When you sat in my lap I felt you were delicate. You were fragile. And you held me, held me tight. Did I hold you tight enough back? Did I cuddle you softly, warmly?

I loved you. When your lips pressed to mine, when you kissed me, I knew that you would not be mine for long enough. I already knew you were leaving me… you were leaving everything. But I love you. And I am sorry that I could not help you then, and I cannot help you now.
This is only a short one.

I'd like to know if the questions disrupt the flow and the tone or not and if they are too blunt. I would appreciate it if any spelling or grammar mistakes are found if someone would point them out.
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The band kept going. They went from place to place and it took around a month or more. It was a long tour. The band had already been on their places and played their music and concert.It had been long weeks with fans who yelled out their names and lots of fame without any rest. The sad thing was that the band had seemed to forgotten about what happened a week earlier. Murdoc and 2D didn't fight or speak to each other at all. They stayed quiet and did their "work" instead. They only focused on the music and the concert. Noodle and Russel didn't bother at all. They just felt glad that the two guys finally stopped fighting for a while. Sure 2D and Murdoc fought a little but that didn't turned out much worse at all. And without knowing it the tour was over and the band could finally go home to Kong studios again. The bassist sat in the driver's seat and stared at the road with half opened eyes. He had waited so long to finally get home again. It was early in the morning as usual when they had left their latest hotel. Beside him sat the singer and looked out through the window without a word. He hadn't said anything to Murdoc in a few days now. In the back seat sat Russel and Noodle. Noodle was sleeping. That was no surprise for the others at all. She hadn't done much else in a long time. But they could understand that the poor young girl was tired as hell. Russel groaned as he sat up straight and pulled up the cap from his face.

Russel: Hey muds?

Murdoc: What…

Russel: Are we there yet?

Murdoc: Soon…

Russel shrugged and rested himself against the seat again. He was just as tired as the other's and couldn't wait to just come home and chill out a little. The car trip didn't last for so much longer and soon they could spot Kong studios again. 2D sighed and turned to the bassist. Murdoc didn't look back at him and kept driving up to the large building.  Soon they arrived at the car park in Murdoc's new car. The four band members groaned and stretched as they stepped out of the car. 2D stretched out his back and heard a cracking sound coming from it. The same sound was heard as Murdoc stretched out his neck a little. They had been sitting still for too long in that bloody car. Russel woke up Noodle who sat up and rubbed her eyes. Then she jumped out and walked up to the boot cover where Murdoc already had grabbed his bass and his bags. He waited for the others to grab their things what felt like forever to the bassist. Russel helped Noodle to carry up her bags to the top floor. She smiled and thanked him as she jumped beside him in happiness. She felt a lot better to be home again. As soon as the others were done Murdoc slammed the door's shut to the car and looked it, then he took his things and walked over to his Winnebago. He grinned a little as he saw it. He really had missed his dear old Winne. The first thing he met was an angry black bird that flew up at him and yelled into his face. Cortez seemed to be a little mad at his owner just for leaving him alone for such a long time. Murdoc sighed and stretched out his arm and let the big bird land on it. He petted Cortez's slowly and then let him sit on the bassist's shoulder as he packed up his things. Cortez made high noises every time Murdoc moved around in the room. He sighed and rolled his eyes. He knew that the bird was hungry.

Murdoc: If you just give me a bloody minute I will feed you in no time.

Cortez: "Krahh!"

Murdoc: I'll take that as a "yes"…

2D was in his room packing up his things. He sighed and threw the bag with dirty clothes on the floor. He would clean them later. He walked around the room and inspected it a little. Nothing had changed since they left. 2D smiled a little and sat down on the bed. It felt good to be back in his own room again, alone with all his keyboards and technical stuff. 2D slowly laid down on his and stuck a cigarette between his lips. He digs into his pocket to find his lighter. As soon as he had found it he lighted the cigarette with a quick move. He looked up in the ceiling as he inhaled the strong smoke from the cig. He thought about the whole tour. It had been wicked and totally crazy. He hadn't talked to Murdoc for a long time now. He decided to talk to him about the whole thing. He didn't care if they started a fight after it. He wanted and needed to get some things off his chest. Later 2D walked up to the kitchen to get something into his empty stomach. He sighed as he walked through the corridors. Why had he picked a room that was miles from the kitchen he thought?  Soon he had finally reached it and stepped inside. To his surprised he found Murdoc standing there with Cortez on the table. Murdoc had gone to the kitchen to feed the bird. He didn't seem to have anything good in his Winnebago to give the bird. Well, at least no eyeballs to give him. Murdoc had just give Cortez a piece of raw bacon as 2D stepped inside the kitchen. Murdoc and 2D almost froze when they saw each other. 2D quickly looked aside and Murdoc ignored him. 2D then took the courage and walked up to the bassist who was too busy with feeding his bird.

2D: M-Muds?

Murdoc: …

2D: Murdoc!

Murdoc: What!?

2D: Look Muds I…

Murdoc: What is it!?

2D rubbed his hair slowly as he shyly looked up at the bassist. He thought it maybe could be a start if he didn't bring up the subject to quick.

2D: What do you thought about the tour?

Murdoc: It went to hell…

2D: Come on… It couldn't be that bad.

Murdoc: For me it was!

2D: Well I had fun.

Murdoc: Oh yeah of course you had…*sarcastic tone*

2D: Eh?

Murdoc: You seemed to have real fun screwing bitches!

2D: Oh yeah! How about you then!?

Murdoc: Like I would tell you anything about my private life!

2D: Then why are you teasing me all the time!?

Murdoc: Doesn't matter! But you're not calling that Bitch Jill!



2D: She's just my friend!

Murdoc: Oh really!? Is that why you made out with her and took her number!?

2D: You jerk! I don't want to be with her!

Murdoc: Yeah right!

2D: Why can't you just get that I don't want her! Please Muds! I want to talk about what happened on the tour! I want to talk about… US!


2D: Wha-

Murdoc: Don't you get it 2D! There's no US! There have never been and will never be!

2D: But…

Murdoc: NO MORE!


Murdoc: You take that back you creep!

2D: Hell no!


2D: You always only care about yourself! You totally give a carp in what people around you feel! WHY!?



Murdoc: SHUT UP!

2D: You're a selfish bastard who just let your life go to hell!



Murdoc flinched as those words hit him like a bullet. When he thought back on his hard childhood he felt the anger and sadness grow inside him. He growled and clenched his fists together hard.

Murdoc: You know what face ache!?


Murdoc: That time I hit you with my car and you went into that bloody coma I had two choices! It was YOU or JAIL! And you know what! I THINK I MADE THE WRONG CHOICE!

2D: *flinches*


2D: I'm out of here…

Murdoc: GREAT! I don't want to see your ugly face in a long time! Lock yourself up in your room or something!

2D: Oh you won't see my face at all! I'M LEAVEING THIS BLOODY PLACE!



Without letting the bassist answer 2D rushed out of the kitchen with the tears streaming out from his eyes. Maybe Murdoc was right. Maybe he had made the wrong choice.  Murdoc only growled and banged his fist into the table. He had never felt so angry, sad and confused before. 2D ran down the corridor and accidently ran into Russel. 2D backed away and quickly covered his face with his hand. He then ran pass the drummer with a little humbling noise that sounded like "Sorry". Russel flinched as 2D ran away to the elevator and went down. Noodle came out of her room and wondered about the racket. She blinked as she saw Russel standing in the middle of the corridor all confused. Suddenly he growled and walked into the kitchen where Murdoc was. Russel had enough. What the hell had they done this time? As Russel went into the Kitchen Noodle tilted her head and ran after 2D. She wanted to know why he had run away like that. She had heard that he was crying. Russel went into the kitchen and glared at the bassist. Murdoc glared back at him with his mismatched eyes.

Murdoc: WHAT!?

Russel: What the hell did you do!?

Murdoc: I didn't do anything!

Russel: That face D was making was a sight on SOMETHING! What the hell did you do man!

Murdoc: That creep picked up my childhood! That was fucking low even for him!





The bassist and the drummer yelled at each other like crazy and there was no wonder why. They were both tired and angry after everything that had happened. As they kept fighting Noodle had run after 2D. She was now at the car park and was now near the singer door. 2D had ran down to his room and kicked around himself like crazy. He was filled with hate and sadness that ate him up inside. He had then grabbed his suitcase and packed down lots of his things into it. He packed down almost his whole room. He took everything he could get. He then grabbed his cell phone and called for a taxi to the airport. He just wanted to get away from this place as fast as possible. 2D packed down the last things he had near him and closed the suitcases. He hadn't noticed that Noodle had watched everything from his doorway. She was shaking in fear and shock. She then turned and ran back to the kitchen. She had to tell the others. Russel and Murdoc were yelling at each other just as much as before and didn't noticed the exhausted and unstrung Asian girl who almost fell into the kitchen as she ran inside. Russel and Murdoc stopped yelling and stared at Noodle who panted fast and waved with her arms around her. She was so exhausted and unstrung that she almost couldn't speak clear. Russel walked up to her and tried to calm her down.

Noodle: 2D-kun! *pant* … TAXI! GO!

Murdoc: Umm…

Russel: Calm down baby girl. What're you saying? You wanna drive a taxi with D?

Noodle: *Roll her eyes and jumps up and down frustrated* NO!! *Pant*

Russel: Calm down! I don't get what you're saying.

Noodle: *take's a deep breath* 2D-KUN IS LEAVING IN A TAXI!

Both Russel and Murdoc flinched when Noodle yelled out the horrible news. Russel gasped and Noodle ran out on the balcony. She pointed down and jumped on the spot in frustration and shock. Russel hurried up and ran out to her. He gasped when he saw a taxi standing parked outside the door. Suddenly 2D walked out through the doors and walked up to the taxi with two big suitcases and a back bag hanging over his left shoulder. Noodle tried to shout after him but she was still too unstrung to even make a word. The driver helped 2D to get in his bags in the boot cover and then he got into the front seat. Noodle and Russel both gasped and couldn't believe what they saw. Murdoc came out just as 2D had got into the car. The band watched the car drive away from the building. 2D gave Kong studios a last look from the side mirror. He sighed deeply and leaned his head back at the car seat. He wished he had said good bye to Noodle and Russel. But at the same time he would never have could have done it. The taxi was soon out in the traffic and it was on its way to the air port. Back at Kong studios the three band members was still standing all shocked at the balcony. Noodle blinked slowly and felt the tears fill her eyes. Russel petted her head and Murdoc shook his head and sighed deeply. Russel turned his head and looked at the bassist.

Russel: What the hell was all that about!?

Murdoc: OI! How the bloody hell should I know!?

Russel: Well you made him cry like that man! What the heck did you say to him!?

Murdoc: NOTHING!

Russel: Yeah right! Then why did he leave the place like that!?


Noodle: airport…

Russel & Murdoc: Huh!?

Noodle: He's going to the airport…

Russel: Where's he going?

Noodle: *sobs* I…I don't know…

Murdoc: Why do you jerks even care? You all know 2D! He will come back sooner or later!

Just as Murdoc had said those words Cortez suddenly landed on his shoulder. The bird croaked into the bassist's ear in a kind of sarcastic way. It almost sounded like the bird tried to tell him "Yeah right". Murdoc growled and quickly shooed the bird off his shoulder by whisk his hands after Cortez.


Cortez quickly croaked high and flew off the bassist's shoulder with a quick move and landed on the table. The bird glared at the bassist with its black eyes and Murdoc only growled in answer. Noodle and Russel blinked at the bassist without saying a word. Murdoc glared back at them.

Murdoc: As I said! You don't have to worry about a thing! He will come back! He always does! You heard me! HE ALWAYS DOES!

Chapter 17 ^^
Oh dear things are getting a little dramatic aren't they? Oh and I put in Cortez too because I like Cortez XD Enjoy it all. Hope 2D and Murdoc can fix this.



gorillaz (c) hewlett & albarn
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Artist's comment:  I can't believe I couldn't think of ANYTHING good.  I literally spent 2 weeks restarting this over and over. And still nothing good came out of it.  Fuck...I'm so sorry...There will be things that I look forward to writing out...but it'll take some time to get to them...I'm filling in the boring stuff as much as I can.  Forgive me. :C


"Wot the fuck happened?" A distant, muffled voice asked.  Murdoc's voice. "Well...we DID get along for the first few minutes...and turned rotten real fast.  David--"  Rachel's voice was cut off quickly. "Oh! It's always David!  If he's got a problem wit' me, then me and him'll talk it out!  He needs to leave Stuart out of it!"  The bassist was getting angry. "I know..."  A quiet growl. "Where the fuck is he, anyway?"  There was a pause. "At work.  Stuart's in here."
A door opened and light blinded the newly woken up singer. "Ngh."  Murdoc walked over. "Yer awake, good."  2D rubbed his head. "...Where's Lucinda?"  Rachel came up to the bed, the child asleep in her arms.  "Here, sweetie."  2D was handed the infant gently. "...Will you at least stay for lunch?  I made a few sandwiches for you and Murdoc, dear."  She asked with hope in her voice. "Sure, mum."  He smiled.  The young man smiled politely and slowly got up from the bed. "...Muds..."  Murdoc looked over at the singer. "Shh. Let's jus'--"  2D shook his head. "I love you." Murdoc smiled softly, watching 2D get up off the bed. "...Hm..I love ya too, Stu."  He walked over and wrapped his arms around the singer, kissing him on the lips once, pulling away.  Chuckling, 2D took Murdoc's hand and led him to the kitchen, sitting in one of the dining chairs. Lucinda was cradled in his right arm.
Murdoc let go of 2D's hand and sat in the chair next to him. "Hmmn...Smells good."  Rachel smiled and set pre-made sandwiches in front of them. "Here."
Next, a bottle of water was passed to 2D, who opened it and drank some. "Fanks, mum."  Murdoc was handed a bottle of champagne. "Wot--..."  He looked up at Rachel in confusion. "It's the only alcohol we have.  We don't drink here.  It was a gift for us."  

The bassist took the drink and popped the top off.  Next, he downed about a third of it. "Ahh..."  Nice and refreshing. "Thanks, Rachel."  He smiled at her as kindly as possible.  It was enough. She took it and nodded. "I really wished that the visit hadn't turned out the way it had. Sorry."  She looked at the table in slight shame. "
Murdoc grunted. "David's an asshole.  I dunno why ya still love'im."  Rachel looked up to stare at Murdoc. "Because...He's not picky about much..except when it comes to the biblical things...he's very religious.  We get along 98 percent of the time."  She let out a long sigh. "I'm sorry, Stuart..."  2D looked up at his mother. "Vere isn' a reason fer ya to be sorry, mum..fings 'appen..." He smiled politely.  "Besides...Muds an' I can deal wif' dad's's jus' one person...right' Muds?"  The bassist nodded quickly. "Yup.  I could care less 'bout wot he thinks of me."  A quiet chuckle left him. "I don't give a shite."  2D sighed and looked down at Lucinda.
"..."  She looked so happy and peaceful.

" long HAVE you and David been married?"  Murdoc finally asked. "...." Rachel sighed. "...Let's see...hmm...About 40 years."  The bassist's eyes widened in astonishment. "Whoa. I don't think I could ever commit like that."  Rachel frowned and stared at Murdoc. "You better with my Stuey." She stated with a bland tone. "I want him to be happy for a long time."  Her gaze pierced into his soul. "...Right. I'll do my best."
Rachel smiled at the bassist. "Good."   2D finished his sandwich and got up, stretching
Until finally.
"Okay, Rachel.  It was fun an' all...but we need to be headin' back." Murdoc got up and popped his back. "C'mon, Stuart."    2D nodded and got up also, being gentle with Lucinda.  "Awright.  Fanks fer invitin' meh, mum."  He walked over and kissed Rachel's cheek. "I love ya, bye!"  He left with Murdoc quickly, closing the door behind.
"Vat wasn' so bad..."  Murdoc turned to him. "Awful.  If he ever does somethin' like that to you again...Grr..."  The bassist stormed off for the car with 2D following right behind. "Wai'!" He reached the vehicle and got in. "...Can I get an ice cream, Muds?" He begged.
Murdoc growled. "Wotever..."  The Geep was started and they both headed to the ice cream shop, 2D falling asleep on the way.  He dreamed about kittens and butterflies.

When they got there, Murdoc looked over at him and blinked. "...You..."  He smiled. "Cute...All I can say."  He pulled out and drove back home.
Once they got there, the bassist shook 2D awake gently. "Hm? Wot?  Apple pie?"  The singer looked around and sighed. "We 'ome already?"  Murdoc nodded and got out, taking the keys with him.  "Muds, where ya goin'?"  2D asked as Murdoc headed for the Winnebago.  "Bed...?"  The singer got out too. "Can...I join you?""  He purred.  Murdoc bit his lip and looked over at him. "....Sure."  A grin spread on his face.  Black eyes widened. "Cool! 'old on while I ask Noodle to watch 'er."  He dashed away and ran up the stairs with Lucinda, going straight to Noodle's bedroom.
4 sharp knocks were administered to her door and he bounced on the balls of his feet, eager.  "Hnn..."
When Noodle opened up, Lucinda was handed over. "Please watch 'er!"  He smiled and left the hallway, going back to Murdoc's Winnebago. When he opened the door, soft rock music was playing and the lights were off. "...Muds? Where are ya, luv?"  
There was a low chuckle from the bedroom and 2D walked over to it, opening the door. "...Muhdoc?"
The bassist was laying on the bed, in only his underwear. "Hey there, Hmhmhm~"  He purred. "Come on in."  2D smirked and started to take his clothes off, his shoes the first to go.
Within 2 whole minutes, 2D was stripped down to nothing, crawling on the bed.  

Murdoc wrapped his arms around the singer and pressed his lips to the singer's neck, kissing along it to his jawline. "Mhh.."  2D blushed and closed his eyes, feeling a caulloused hand moved down his body. "Uhn..." The bassist licked along where he bit. "Mhh..y'like?"  He bit down at the crook of 2D's neck, causing 2D to yelp. "Ahn! one 'urt."  Murdoc chuckled and kissed the spot, licking up the blood. "M-Muds..."  He moaned, wrapping his own arms around Murdoc's waist.
He seemed eager to fuck. "Mhm.."  The Satanist smiled, moving his hips along the singer's, causing 2D to let out a high pitched moan. "Nnn!"  A quiet whimper left the younger as he moved his hips back and forth, almost begging for contact. "Muhdoc..."   The bassist didn't seem too anxious to give 2D what he wanted right away.   Teasing him with his body. "Ahnn...Stop!  Y-Ya doin' vat on purpose..."

Murdoc's hand went up to 2D's chest, rubbing. " tense."  That hand slid down past 2D's crotch, making him moan heavily. "Stoppit!  Jus' fuck me, Muds."

The bassist laughed and pulled 2D close to him, pressing his lips to the other's. "Mhh...very well."   2D was pushed down on the bed and Murdoc lifted his legs up.
"Wai'!"  He called and pushed Murdoc off.  The singer then dug around the room until he found the thing he was looking for.  A condom.  
The Satanist grunted in annoyance. "Wot the fuck?  I ain'--" "It's jus' fer safety, luv."  Murdoc grumbled and snatched the rubber, open the package and taking his underwear off quickly, which surprisingly he hadn't done yet.  The condom was put on and he glared at the singer. "Happy yer highness?"
The bluenette grinned. "It'll work."  His arms wrapped around Murdoc again and pulled him close. "Now...let's get frisky!"  He giggled and pulled him down for a kiss, while Murdoc immediately went for the gold.
I'm so sorry for ruining this story >:C
IT'll get better...I hope. :I

forgive meh.
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