Thoughts on PolyamoryIt seems to me that most people think of polyamory in terms of threesomes, of swinging. A way of sleeping around that isn't technically "cheating." A prevailing idea in the '60s counterculture was free love. Most people thought they were free, expressing an interchange of love with multiple partners. But it wasn't. It was slutting around without consequences. But at least everyone was equal, and diverging from the old way. In my mind, polyamory isn't openly getting with as many people as you want at a time.Thoughts on Polyamory5 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
It's not speed-dating. There are those who have serial marriages, serial daters. They are with someone for a few weeks, a few months, and then move on. There is no growth in the relationship, and as soon as the partner doesn't meet your conditions anymore, you move on. You are done with them. This kind of carousel relationship practice fall short of what polyamory should be by miles.
To get to the pinnacle of a polyamorous lifes
3rd thoughts regarding polyamoryI've continued working on what polyamory means to me and applying it to my life as I move through it. There must be some balance between all these friends, mustn't there? I don't think it's juggling, I think it's more like spinning plates. There's some orbital movement, some rotation, but you're not letting go of one thing (a ball) to hold another, you're adding to your own unique solar system. I like that. It's charming, and feels harmonic, feels orchestral.3rd thoughts regarding polyamory4 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
It occurred to me just the other day, as I was struggling very hard to get through yet another emotional expectation-laced hurdle, that I wasn't being fair. I was actually being quite girly (no offense ladies); I was reacting emotionally and somewhat possessively, even. If I can't apply my behavior rules that I set for myself to everyone that I interact with, then I'm doing it wrong. There has to be balance, and equality.
I took a few hours to get my head back on straight, at
More Thoughts on PolyamoryPolyamory is very difficult in practice. On paper it makes sense, the theory is good. But to behave in this way is unbelievably frightening to some people. Most people? Maybe it's me, maybe it's the way I go about friendships. If someone becomes interesting enough for me to invest time in, they seem like an intense, intelligent entity that I can learn from, I get excited. Share humor? Yes, motherfucking yes. And when I become dazzled I begin to love the person. It's not that I suddenly fall in love and set all my hopes and dreams on any one person, it's that they have afforded themself the unleashing of the unconditional.More Thoughts on Polyamory4 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
It sounds like I'm laying a trap. Most people that I encounter feel safe and secure within the societal boundaries of entitlement and expectation. They're used to being told they are bad if..., they are good if..., and to me that's not a correct way to go about it. I have my opinions on what