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I like being a human. I think I would remain a Homo sapiens even if I could choose any animal to be... but there are a couple things I don't like about it.
 I think what I hate most about our modern human life is the concept of time being chopped into blocks, like hours, days, weeks etc.   Days do not really have names.  It gives me claustrophobia to have that calender grid laid out, covering my past AND already covering my future! It is my own, pristine untrammeled future! Keep that stupid concept of time off of it!
 No way to escape it.
 AND my ticking clock is sitting here, chomping up time in little bites  like- like  PAC MAN ... argh!

That, and I wish we had tails.

What do you NOT like  about living life as a human?
Yes, of course , there's the problem that humans seem to be genetically wired to hate and massacre each other for no good reason,  but I'm talking about more mundane things about physically or mentally living your life as a human:
Ear worms, Nose hair, trouble scratching your back, stuff like that.
  • Mood: Love
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Worth reading.

Wed Apr 10, 2013, 8:27 AM


Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this.

You come home from school one day. You've had yet another horrible day. You're just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you've written and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time.
A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don't answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you're asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She's screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that "Mommy is crying and sissy won't wake up."

Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what's going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying.

The next day at school, there's an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they've said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can't help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can't handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They're sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She's in shock. She can't believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can't cry, she can't feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out.

It's a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone's crying, your little brother still doesn't know you killed yourself, he's too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn't stop for days.
It's two years later. Most of the kids from school to a counselor/therapist at least once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn't know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn't succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.

People care.
You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don't just effect you. They effect everyone. Don't end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can't get better if you give up. I'm here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we've NEVER talked before,
I'm here for you.
♥ It hurts. Things do eventually get better. don't give up. ♥

Copy and paste this as your journal to show people there are people out there that care.

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This is not some journal about personal woes. I just want to talk briefly about some attitudes towards realistic (and other) art styles that I've come across that... It just kinda seriously bothers me that people think that way about me and other people and themselves.

So here it is; Drawing realism does not equal elitism.
I don't draw realistically because I think it makes me better than other people and I don't know anyone else who does either. I draw realistically because I like drawing that way. Because I'm very particular about details and drawing little tiny details makes me ridiculously happy. It's just how I like to draw.

It doesn't make me better than you or anyone else.

I don't think any of you are below me because you draw anime/manga or cartoon styles. More power to you because I tend to struggle with it, honestly.
And if we all drew the exact same way, all our art would be the same and it would be boring as hell.
Your art style is unique- it will always need work, refinement, and technical boosts, but your art style will never EVER be "bad". There is nothing fundamentally wrong with the way you or anyone else draws.

Drawing is sort of an escape for a lot of people- it makes them happy so if you don't like someone else's art, then it's not your cup of tea so leave them be. Don't leave some asinine comment about how you don't like it. They are not obligated to draw in a way that makes you or anyone else happy. Their art is FOR THEM.
Which also means-
YOU are not obligated to draw in a way that makes some prick on (or off) the internet happy. Some loser leaves a comment about how your art is "bad", ignore them. Come talk to me even if it gets to you or if you just want to improve some aspect of your art. 
If Some loser thinks the way you draw a character is "wrong"- the only thing "wrong" there is how this miserable person thinks about art and artists because you draw or write a character any freaking way you damn well please.

Some true egotistical jackass thinks your picture or nuzlocke should be drawn to suit their preference? HOW ABOUT NO.

Don't go there.
Don't be that person.

If you're one of my watchers and you think it's okay to complain to another Nuzlocker about their art or that they don't update fast enough- STOP. STOP IT RIGHT NOW. It is not even remotely okay.

No one
has done that to me so far and there are almost 1,000 of you. Not. a. single. one. But I have seen some of you (who say nothing but nice things to me) causing trouble for other Nuzlockers.
Why? I don't know.
But I expect you to have enough common sense and just the simple decency to treat other people and nuzlockers, no matter how they draw or how well, with the same amount of respect as you have all given me because they are just as deserving of being treated like an actual human being as I am.

/end rant.
Aerover and out.
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A clear explanation of why you can not laugh at the kids and beginners.
Some users (not just spectators, but also good artists) young authors criticize, laugh at "curves" works. This is silly, especially when the authors do not ask for criticism.
Criticism does not work, it just hurts. Assist cautious practical advice and training. The importance of studying anatomy, drawing and theory to understand himself. It is impossible to impose.
The only important thing: the love of his work, love for the intermediate result and a great desire to paint / sculpt. It is better if the young author will draw hundreds of pictures a month of unsuccessful than successful one once a year.
At the same time, it is important to invest ourselves into work, rather than mechanically drawing the line. But investing is not possible if you do not love yourself and your creativity.
I started sculpting in 2006. If I were recaptured desire, if not there were people who liked even the first of ... I'd never sculpted Melhar, Aelhar and others.
01 by hontor-old-art02 by hontor-old-art03 by hontor-old-art04 by hontor-old-art05 by hontor-old-art
06 by hontor-old-art07 by hontor-old-art08 by hontor-old-art09 by hontor-old-art010 by hontor-old-art
Good luck, especially novice authors!
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MOVE on Identity: A thing about Art and so called 'talent'

[My Opinion Versus Everyone] Please remember these are simply my opinions and are not meant to imply that you should agree or disagree nor should these prove to be offensive in any way; if I do come across displeasingly then you have my apologies beforehand, thank you.
EDIT: I added the project MOVE header ^-^ 12/18/12~ This was written a while before that though but it falls under the category :)

I'm writing this partially because of a situation I'm in right now with an artist who I will keep anonymous... and partially because I've wanted to get this out for months now.. And I assure you I probably will not sound like the same person you've known as 'Capu' for my 10 months here now..

Although I ask that if you do care, you'd read this, all of it.
And can I say that my emotions while writing this are non other than a simple need to have as many people understand what I'm trying to say. That skill isn't achieved through talent, but by work. Just work. 

Now where shall I begin? First. I want to start of with my progress in art this past year.

Sky: reference by Capukat This everyone, was my very first deviation on Capukat. 10 months ago.
I don't need to be told to know I was far more 
un...artistic? Than every one of you.
And how, you ask? Does this deviation turn into this
Snips of Light by Capukat
which is my latest full art submission...? Well read on, fellow reader, and I shall spill my secrets~
Yes I've had a few accounts before this, of which I've stayed on for about a week each because not in my wildest dreams did I ever feel I'd ever create art that would gain more than 4 views and 0 favorites.

on Whimsy I stayed a bit longer, for 2 months, this was when I first got more serious and decided digital art, was something I wanted to pursue..

If there is one thing you must know about me, it is that I'm narrowminded, and once I set my mind on one thing, I do whatever it takes to satisfy myself.

And I've found that one thing.

I can't sing, I can't dance, I can't make friends.
I will admit I know a lot of people just want to be friends with the popularity but I couldn't care less.
My closest friends? Online. How many watchers? About 50. These two people know who they are. And you will see me talk to them on my stream, in comments, on skype. I don't need 50 friends, or 20, or 10. I have two best friends and they are the real people I look to for everything you'd categorize as 'friend'

At school? I've been the loner. The weirdo. The sociopath.
I've been called the Grudge
The Witch
The ~female dog~
Oh the list goes on~

I used to sit by myself, opposite side of the kick ball wall so I would get shade while I wait out recess. 
That was in 2nd grade.

I write this as I'm in 10th grade.
And today I sat for the lunch period against a brick wall outside of my class with my lunch locked in the room, as I study the shadows cast upon the blue lockers and while sitting there, I try to see how I might improve my shading by studying the way the lockers are... 'shaded'

I sit there, head low, rested on my arms, legs crossed, hugging myself tightly as I daydream to pass time.
I'm the new kid. For the 9th time. 

And it's been this way as long as I can remember.
I could go on, venting about my lack of the normal social teen life; how I've never worn makeup or go shopping for clothes once a year if I'm lucky or have my hair cut every six months with no style except for straight. Thin. Or a lot of things I could go on about. But I won't, because I will be honest and say I don't need hollow sympathy or attention. So let's continue~
And where do I look to for salvation? A happier ending? I suppose you could say that’s where my online life fits in~
The only thing I can do is draw. And deviantArt has allowed me to make something of a life out of it and I'm more than grateful.

It's not uncommon for me to spend 2 hours
3 sometimes
possibly 4 just sitting idly doing almost nothing
thinking about new art ideas
new concepts
new designs
New ways to ... improve~
I've deprived myself of sleep
Skipped meals
All without meaning to of course
But meaning to better myself in what I do.
I don't give up once I start. And I never mean to. I may be negative in just about anything else, you can ask my friends! But there is not a single moment where I've compared my work to another artist's without thinking:
One day I'll bring myself up to your level. And that day will come sooner than later. 

I believe 
Believing isn't everything. You have to 

Sound familiar? Maybe a flicker of recognition is sparking somewhere?

Yes. Hard work. Hands on.
I spent a good 10-15 hours. Every. Day. During summer vacation this year. Dedicated that time to art.
You'd think oh! My parents allow me so much freedom. They don't love the fact I'm ruining my back.
Or my eyes.
Or my health.
No, and I get lectured and punished fairly for it. As I should. But this doesn't stop me.
I've been grounded. Yes.
But I want art. I want to get better. And I'm not letting anything get in between me and what I want.

I've spent over 600 hours alone during my summer break. I livestreamed everything. There's proof. You can ask. You can view the videos and check the dates. I assure you they're there.
And now with school? That gets reduced to about 30-40 hours weekly digital art. And add on another 5-10 hours traditional, procrastinate, not-focusing-on-lecture, art. Yes I've risked bad grades, more punishments, everything and anything.

But to me? It's worth it. And even now I'm not satisfied with my art. And they say your harshest critic is yourself and I say that's true. Because so long as there's room for improvement, I will never be truly satisfied. And there's always room for improvement. And it doesn't matter what I'll have to get through to get what I want, because I'll never stop wanting to get better. And that ultimately has brought me here.

I've spent over 1,000 hours this year so far on digital art.
I dare you to tell me you topped that and ask why you didn't improve because if you did, and you tried hard, and you squinted at that screen, tensing your hand, tilted your head, skipped food and water on occasions and even held off bathroom breaks, I dare you to tell me you didn't see improvement.

I dare you to tell me that you sincerely did all that and I dare you to show me your work, past and present, and I dare. you. to tell me to my. face. that you didn't see progress.

If you've read everything up to this point, I'll admit, I'm impressed~ :meow: But a little more, bear with me shall we?

Now at the moment, you may be wondering what my art thoughts are. Well. I want to draw humans. And if I've gotten to where I am in animal anatomy in a year, I believe I can do so with humans too. And I've started making extra time sketching humans on the corners of my class work pages or my schedule. And I'm determined to never stop.

I'm still not satisfied with my animal art, never will be fully, but this is what fuels me. Keeps me going. Feeds my ambition. I may try to come off as calm, reserved, nonchalant, and controlled. But the side of me knows better that I'm ambitious and I'm not afraid to admit so. 
Because if there's a will
there's a way.
And with my ambition and desire to improve, my will to do better, I've done it.
And I'm here to show you, to show everyone, it's possible. And that I'm not the limit.
There are others yet just waiting to do better than me. Put even more time. More effort. 
I'm doing the best I can with what I have.

But what you may ask is my ultimate goal in writing this?
I want to make sure that a few things are clear:
-I'm socially awkward; yes.
-I really never have been popular in real life; most likely never will be. (who knows, if I want it enough maybe there'll be a way with my will, but as for now I'm content, and used to it)
-I'm an artist through and through. And what makes me one is my passion for art, and never my skill.
-Talent is another word for the ability to put work into what you love. In this definition, you cannot do anything without the talent. If it's defined as natural ability to do things phenomenally, then let me tell you I didn't come here by snapping my fingers.
    a) because I can't even snap them /facepalm/
    b) you're probably head-desking due to my sarcastic and fail-of-a sense of humor
    c) if it wasn't clear, magic doesn't exist in the 21rst century therefore talent isn't what you think it is
-I may seem harsh, rude, or insensitive, uncaring. But I didn't put this up for my pleasure. So the least I can ask if that you be considerate before making judgmental thoughts.
-Art isn't for everyone. That's why we have singers, actors, dancers, engineers, scientists, you name it~ Find your passion. Pursue it. Live it, breathe it.
-And finally, be yourself. And realize that you're special in your own way but yes, work really is what's going to bring you somewhere.
-And really? If you love it, then it won't be work. Art is never work for me. It is in the literal sense, but to me, when people ask how I get the patience to draw so much? I reply simply: I love every moment of it.

:heart: So please, I thank you, everyone who's read this, for your time. And may you all have a wonderful night~

And morning/afternoon/evening.
Thank you,


By the way, here's an improvement meme if you'd like to check it out :aww:
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I have appointed Fay-13 to distribute the points to you .  Each participant will get 1 point each (800 + 668 = 1.++++ so lets just count as 1 shall we)  and those who made an additional journal entry , I will be showing you guys a piece of artwork that I will be unveiling in about a weeks time . Thank you so much for your participation . As there are 600+ over people who joined this , please give Miss Fay sometime to pass you guys the point 1 by 1 , cheers !!!!

** Next point giving session will be 5000 points, AGAIN , everyone gets it ! **   Stay tuned ! 



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  • Mood: Jolly
  • Listening to: Random Music
  • Reading: Different Role Plays
  • Watching: Myself type


name: Victoria or Spirit
age: 14
zodiac: Gemini
gender: Female
interests: Wolves, Disney Movies, Drawing,
occupation: Student & Swimmer
sexual orientation: Straight
birthday: June 14th
favorite pokemon: fennekin, Houndoom, eevee, and poochina


I am half Porterican and half Colombian


TBA; currently, I'm without my tablet
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  • Listening to: The sound of my radiator
  • Reading: This journal
  • Watching: My laptop screen
  • Playing: Super Pokémon Rumble
  • Eating: A hot dog
  • Drinking: Soda
I haven't played Pokémon in a while, because I've been playing a lot more Mario :XD: BUT I recently bought Super Pokémon Rumble (Pokémon Rumble Blast in NA)...I'm addicted. It's awesome. I LOVE IT.

I've always wanted to make my own Pokémon fan comic. Would you guys like it if I made one? I just made the characters and I'll post them on dA soon. But I haven't figured out their personalities yet...

Spot (Spinda)
Bill (Psyduck)
Jay (Unown)
Zack (Porygon-Z)
Sammy (Simipour)*Shiny*
Larry (Larvesta)
Shroom (Shroomish)

I don't know if these Pokémon will be trained or wild. It's a pretty interesting group of Pokémon. I wanted to use Pokémon that a lot of people don't usually think of. What do you guys think?

Oh, and these comics are supposed to be strips with the Pokémon talking to each other with maybe the occasional story arc, which will have some action.
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  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: Crystalmethequins
  • Playing: Dishonored
  • Eating: Please don't talk about food
  • Drinking: Mountain Dew
I have decided..... Wolpy's tales will end..... and all of you will learn the truth of his life......

Wolpy held onto Hunter as tightly as he could, tears rolled down his eyes as the dark void tried to pull her in.
"I am not letting you go! It isn't taking my mate!"
He cries and holds her tightly, she licks his cheek,
"No... Wolpy... it's my time to leave"
He looks shocked,
She looks sad, her ears fold back
"I love you, but my time here is over..."
"No.... please no..."
She kisses him one last time and lets go, she is dragged into darkness, the violent winds stop as it now has what it wants. Wolpy stares into the dark abyss, he is speechless and heartbroken. Guardian and the pups come rushing in.
"Where is she?!"
Wolpy has tears rolling down his eyes
"Gone......... she let go......."
Guardian sighs
"Everyone..... has to go sometime........"
Wolpy cries, the love of his life and soulmate sacrificed herself, he covers his eyes. A white pup goes to him
"Daddy?..... where's mommy...?" He licks her softly on the head
"She.... she is in a better place sweetie........"
His pups hug him, at the loss of his mate, he has given up on living, he is forever changed.

Two men watch the scene from a sealed off room, the monitor flickers
"Crap.... looks like he's kicked it."
"Pump more stimulants into him, maybe we can do a reset." He shakes his head
"No, he's done for, look at his brain waves, since she died..... he is too unstable"
One of the men gets up and goes into a room connected with the one they are in, inside are two wolves on tables, they have wires connected from their heads to complex computers and feeding tubes. One is a grey female with black stripes, her equipment is shut off and her life signs are dead. The other is a large black male, his equipment is still running but his mental scans show instability.
One of the men pull out a tape recorder, he tapes the record button
"December 17, 2012. After disconnecting Subject H from Subject M she had a lethal heart-attack. Subject M responded with instability as if knowing what happened without contact. Shows possible bonding beyond physical. Subject M has suffered an entire mental breakdown, the use of stimulants to revert him to a pup will only make this state worse than it is. He is unsuitable for testing after the Sky Project. Terminating"  
He stands up from his chair and begins to step out the door to the wolf, the other man stops him
"No... I'll do it.... I've been with him since he was a newborn" The other man shrugged and sat back down. He went to the large wolf and began to pet his raggad black fur, he lets out a quiet purr. He pulls out a syringe and injects him with it. The wolf's purr grows more quiet, the computers quietly click off and his life signs fade away. He keeps petting him
"At least you will be together now......"
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  • Mood: Content
  • Listening to: nothing
  • Reading: nothing
  • Watching: Warhouse 13
  • Playing: Deviant Art
  • Eating: nothing
  • Drinking: nothing
Name: Solar Flare
Age: 17 (human years)
Pet: pheonix
Name of pet: Fire Arrow
Sibling(s): Dark moon
Gender: female
Species: unicorn
Teacher: Princess Luna
Specialty: Dark magic, taiming creatures in the everfree forest
Besties: Tool of Heart
Cutie mark: Sun w/ fire coming off that looks like a pheonix
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