Nursery Rhymes, Writer StyleJack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of waterNursery Rhymes, Writer Style2 years ago in Settings More Like This
Then I appeared and struck such fear as I began my slaughter.
I held them down and they did frown as I tossed aside their pail
And I gloat, I slit their throat and threw them down the well.
Now I'm done, well that was fun, the well I then looked down
Don't be sad, it's not as bad as if he'd broke his crown.
So then I walked on through the woods, and noticed at my feet
A trail of bread, led up ahead to a house that smelled so sweet.
When I approached it, in the air was a familiar smell
The smell of burning flesh was there, you know I can just tell.
I looked inside and to my surprise i saw two little kids
I saw them cooking an old hag, they watched her burn within.
I nodded in approval, they're fine without me here
So I walked along and sang a song to find out something near.
I heard a soft-like humming, and smelled out something good
So I looked out through the forest, and spotted a red hood
Following her from behind appeared a wo
I Feel Fine Chp. 9I Feel Fine Chp. 94 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
It's a good thing we left early because by the time we arrived, the place was filled with screaming Beatle maniacs trying to meet their future 'husbands'. Luckily, some of the policemen managed to keep them back. We snuck in through the back of the place, dragging in all the equipment behind us. Trust me, not fun, especially when you practically have a death by cymbal.
Paul and John carried cases which held their guitars. The two walked through the door first, followed by Ringo. He was carrying the snare drum and ride cymbal. I was right behind him helping out by lifting an amp. George was last, with another one of Ringo's cymbals.
Being in between the two of them kind of frightened me. George leaned forward to taunt me. "Don't drop the amp, Laur." He gave a slight grin, baring his tiny fangs. Neither of the boys could see this, but my cheeks got a little red.
I turned to him walking through the doorway. Then I commented, "I won't! Ow!" I hit the cymbal he was hauling with my head. Tot
Adventures of MK Moon and Hans Hoshi: EstrangedCreeeeeeaaaaaaaakkkkkkk. The door to the library slowly swung open. Hans didn't even bother to look up. It was either one of the other five Creators or MK Moon, her best friend. If it was MK then she'd announce herself as she always did. Hans waited, expecting to hear the words: "It is I, the awesome saucey MK Moon!" or something egoistical like that. When the person didn't say anything Hans assumed it was one of the Creators. It's probably Sarah...she's so quiet. She thought to herself with a smile as she return to her homework. Ok, Hans normally wouldn't do her homework in the library but her room was being used as a prank war zone and she needed peace and quiet for her art project.Adventures of MK Moon and Hans Hoshi: Estranged2 years ago in Scraps More Like This
She noticed the silence but said nothing. The last thing she wanted was to annoy Sarah and start a fight. Not that those two were ever at it but you never know. Hans pulled out her MP3 and put her Captain America headphones in. She grew lost in the music as she
I Feel Fine Chp. 10I Feel Fine Chp. 104 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Paul looked over to see if I was ready, but I was still thinking about what the boys had said just moments earlier. Then he waved and I finally noticed it was time to start. I nodded back as I counted the band off. "220.127.116.11.1.2.3!" I did a double hit on the snare and floor tom to begin the song. The crowd was surprised how I nailed it perfectly.
From the side of the stage, Brian looked furious about how I disobeyed his order. Steam was practically spewing out of his ears. We were definitely in for a long lecture later. Yet we didn't really care, we were just enjoying ourselves too much.
John and Paul sang in perfect unison as usual while George was moving around playing his guitar. Ringo was watching everyone else, in deep thought. He had a tiny smile on his face, so I assumed everything was fine. I noticed that quite a few girls in the couple front rows got super duper pissed at me when George looked back in my direction and we exchanged silent laughs. Just wait until they find out th
I Feel Fine Chp. 6I Feel Fine Chp. 64 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
It was starting to get dark, and we all left the ice cream shop, trying to avoid any more photo shoots with the fans. It took FOREVER just waiting for Ringo and some of the other boys to finish up. I didn't even start talking to some of them until we left that it was so bad. Not to mention some girls were attempting to follow us out the door, or at least keep me from leaving. One of them managed to scrape my left arm. Talk about jealous.
We were waiting for John to get a cab over, as we all were talking. "Lauren, is your arm alright? I noticed that some of the girls got rough with you," Paul said concerned of me.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I replied looking at my arm. It was bleeding a bit and a little swollen. Then, I covered it with my hand so no one would worry.
"Really? Then why are you covering it with your hand?" John asked being nosy. He looked back to the streets to get a cab to take us back to the hotel.
"I always do this," I replied.
"Not when you have shopping bags with you," Ringo s
I Feel Fine Chp. 4I Feel Fine Chp. 44 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
The next morning, I woke up early in my hotel room, fully rested and refreshed. I did a quick stretch; then got out of my bed. Getting dressed, I grabbed some casual wear from my suitcase. I was wearing a maroon colored, short sleeved shirt. On the shirt was this logo of a designer company. I chose to match it with a pair of black corduroy pants. Very casual. After that, I briefly straightened my hair in the bathroom. I've got to look at least somewhat decent when going down to the lobby to get breakfast.
When I reached the lobby, I bought a newspaper that came out today. Guess what the top story was? "New talent along with the Fab Four" aka me! It was great! I couldn't wait to show Ringo. Basically, it was about how I'm traveling with the Beatles and why. Now back to what was going on. I headed to the café that was within the hotel. There I snatched some chow for breakfast, taking the bag back up to my room.
On the way back to the room, I somehow ran into George in the hallway. "
I Feel Fine Chp. 3I Feel Fine Chp. 34 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
We've been on the plane for over two hours, and half the people here are asleep, including Ringo. Haha. I knew that because he was resting on my shoulder. It was so cute. Back to the topic here, everyone was pretty content. Paul and George were at the round table playing cards. John and Brian were talking about upcoming plans once we arrive in the U.S. As you already know, Ringo was asleep on my shoulder, while I was drawing on my sketch pad.
Eventually, one of the reporters got up to go to the bathroom. She had short reddish hair, and glasses. She was wearing a business uniform. As she walked down the aisle, she noticed me. "Having fun with Ringo there?" She giggled.
"Huh?" I blushed a bit, "Oh, no. He just fell asleep on my shoulder is all." For all I know, she could be making a front page article on how I seduced Ringo or something. That's just what I need, not.
"Oh alright," she laughed. Then she looked down, seeing what I was up to. "Whoa, that's some artwork! Mind if I get a pict
F.A.C.T.S. About M.K. MoonThree: I will never post a self-portrait or 'selfie'. Though I never really care about how I look pictures (especially taken by myself) makes me feel ultra self conscious and make me feel ugly.(Please do not tell me I'm not ugly. I've gotten over that phase. It's just a feeling and I can't help that.) DO NOT try to be like some people on Tumblr (Not you any of my D.A. friends) who tried to pressure me into taking selifes. Unlike my D.A. friends they just could not accept the fact that I DO NOT WANT/LIKE TO TAKE PICTURES OF MYSELF. They honestly thought sending me anonymous messages demanding a selfie would work. It just made me paranoid and despise Tumblr even more than I already do.F.A.C.T.S. About M.K. Moon2 years ago in Profiles More Like This
Four: I'm a classic rock fan. Please do not try to say 'One Direction is better111!!' or whatever. I not only will not care about your opinion I'll delete your comment. Plain and simple.
Editorial DecisionEdward, you LEECH!Editorial Decision6 years ago in Humor More Like This
Youre a stinking DOG, Jacob!
Then the two fell upon each other, snarling and biting, ripping at each others clothes, then flesh. Jacob was the first to clutch Edwards penis and slide it into his mouth, chomping down. Edward followed suit, grasping Jacobs
I tossed the manuscript on my desk before I tossed my cookies. This was hopeless. This was also the best work Id received yet for the newspaper writing contest. I rubbed my eyes, trying to think up yet another new, polite way to say you so utterly suck.
So? What do you think?
I looked up at the writer responsible for this masterpiece. Mrs. Muldoon was a deacon in our church, and had fallen inexplicably hard for Ms.Meyers vampire wiles. I was as mystified as anyone, I suppose.
What is Love?What is love?What is Love?2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Seriously I wanna know!
Is it that heart-stopping, woozy feeling I get
Whenever I see or hear Axl Rose?
The little girly squeals I do
Whenever I hear the name Shawn Michaels?
The little "bunny-hop" I do in excitement
When I see Triple H on screen?
People say that's called infatuation
Personally I think that love is real
But what do I know?
Or....is it that feeling
I get whenever I see them?
The feeling of happiness
The feeling of wanting to be around that person more
Of not wanting them to leave
Of sadness vanishing whenever they are around
Of laughter, fights, anger, love and hate?
Of never getting enough of their presence
Is that love?
I do know someone like that
They are my world and hopefully
I am their world
They make me smile and laugh
Make me angry and cry
They listen to me and are sympathetic
I'm that way to them too
Not exactly a boy
But not exactly a girl either
So am I straight or gay?
That is however you think I am.
I might be
Top 10: Jesus or SupermanTop 10: Ways of Identifying Jesus or SupermanTop 10: Jesus or Superman5 years ago in Humor More Like This
10. Has returned from the dead more than once, and might possibly do so again.
9. Exploits are followed by millions of avid readers for many years.
8. Subject of painful disagreement and arguments among fans.
7. Does good works without expectation of reward.
6. Maintains a tax-free Fortress of Solitude.
5. Was sent to earth to save us all.
4. Shoots heat-beams from eyes.
3. Primary opponent is evil and prefers underground lair.
2. Native language is not English.
1. Has a superb sense of humor and would never hurt the author of a Top 10 list.
An Interview With Gods n DanteAn Interview With Gods n Dante5 years ago in Fantasy More Like This
1. So in your opinion, are you Uke or seme?
that wasn't he question.
I'm seme in my opinion. cos I have a penis that is the size of my age
i feel like i should be seme but sometimes i donno.
I'm a bottom seme. that likes to cry after we make love
i cry while we make love
because it was beautiful, not cos gods abuses me during,
2. Where you originally into men, or did your significant other whip that out of you? [lol, whip]
yooou must whip it!
Writer's BlockI first met Alistair Creaux at WritersCon '97, and from the first words he uttered to me in a drunken slur I knew he was destined for greatness: Sometimes I get an idea and it's so so sweet I'll just ride it like a buckin bronc and donkey-punch that fucker.Writer's Block4 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
I'd nodded sagely, not quite understanding but impressed by his zeal. Once I'd actually read Creaux's work it all made sense. Wonderful, crazy sense. He wrote like a combination of Hunter S. Thompson, William Burroughs, and Stephen King. Epic storytelling, accessible to the common man, but shot through with Deeper Meaning for those willing to delve.
His fame skyrocketed since I'd discovered him. He was BorderHouse's number one draw; every book pre-sold by the millions as soon as it was announced, anticipated by rabid fans (Creauxians, they called themselves) and lovingly dissected on numerous internet fan sites around the world. Two of his books had beco
As solid as a WilsonAs solid as a WilsonAs solid as a Wilson4 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
Gregory House limped away from the remains that once were his motorbike. There were flames and smoke everywhere that made his vision blurry. He tried to get away from the danger. Danger. Hah. Gregory House didn't know what danger was, he thought bitterly to himself. He sighed as he sat down in the grass. When he looked at his motorbike, he wondered how he actually got there. It seemed like ages ago he was pulling pranks on Wilson
'Morning sunshine.' House said cheerfully when Wilson came in, still wearing his pyjamas. 'Morning' Wilson grunted back. Dark rings under his eyes showed signs of the long nights at the hospital, the many patients and relatives he had to comfort and the pain he had to see every day. 'So, any plans for today?' House asked while he held out a mock with coffee to his friend. 'House, please, not this morning, I'm tired. I had the worst night ev.. What is that?!' He spat out his coffee, midsentence, with a disgusted look. He wiped
Ice Cream Moral - OriginalOnce upon a Summer dayIce Cream Moral - Original11 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Two kids were by the street
And they were eating ice cream cones
So they could beat the heat.
One was a boy, not too young
His age was almost nine
He had a double chocolate scoop
And it tasted mighty fine.
Then there's the girl, his sister, who
Was eleven years of age;
She licked on her vanilla cone
Cause vanilla's all the rage.
Both were very happy
Eating cream of white and brown,
When the little boy licked just too hard
And a scoop fell to the ground.
The little girl just looked and laughed,
"Ha ha, you little brat;
You just dropped yours on the ground
So how do you like that?"
It's not nice to pick on others, so,
As you could surely tell,
She went back to her own ice cream
And suddenly it fell.
The little boy saw this scene
Of two creams on the floor
And then went back to eating his,
For he had one scoop more.
"I like this very much," he said,
His sister looking bum,
"My chocolate cone tastes sweeter
Now that you have none."
Elf vs. Orc 5Sings-to-Trees's primary thought through the whole violent encounter was Not the throat again!Elf vs. Orc 58 years ago in Fantasy More Like This
His neck hurt. He felt like a troll had used his esophagus as a dance floor. This could not be healthy. If he lived through this, he swore he would be nice to his throat for the rest of the year. Hot teas. Scarfs during winter. Anything.
For awhile, he didn't think he was going to live to see sunrise, let alone winter.
Then she'd apologized. The orc had stood there, with a distinctly sheepish expression on her face, and she'd apologized.
None of his patients ever apologized. Most of them couldn't talk, and it didn't seem to occur to the ones who could.
Half of him wanted to reply automatically—No, it's okay, these things happen, don't worry about it—and the other half was jumping up and down screaming You just tried to kill me, you green-faced lunatic! You can't just apologize for trying to kill people!
Perhaps fortunately, his throat was aching too badly
Elf vs. Orc 9Sings-to-Trees' head shot up. He knew Fleabane's barks like the back of his hand. Short, rapid barks, not grating, hysterical ones--somewhere between a greeting and a warning. Fleabane knew the person approaching, but he didn't really like them.Elf vs. Orc 98 years ago in Fantasy More Like This
That meant it was either one of the humans from down the road (excepting Matilda, who brought cheeses and always had a tidbit for a hungry coyote) or the rangers.
"Shit!" Sings-to-Trees leapt to his feet and began kicking Celadon's armor under the bed, followed by the extra blankets.
Celadon got unsteadily to her feet. "What is it?"
"Company. Might be rangers."
She could have asked questions, like "Are you going to turn me in?" or "Why are you panicking, if they're your people?" but Celadon was not inclined to waste time on stupid questions. She looked around hurriedly for a hiding place.
Sings-to-Trees caught her elbow. "Do you trust me?"
"Does it matter?"
"I suppose not."
Getting her into the hiding place was awkward, but Celadon took it in s
why are youwhy are you herewhy are you11 years ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
not knowing what to say
i scream into your face
but you just walk away
you are never there
when you know i'm waiting
you say you keep your word
well your word seems to be fading
you love me
you hate me
make up your fucking mind
you trust me
you'll be there
what are you trying to hide
where are you
when you say you'll never leave me
why do you lock me up
and then throw away the only key
i don't understand
why you lie and say you'll never lie
why do you push and pull
why do you love to see me cry
you love me
you hate me
make up your fucking mind
you say that
you'll be there
what are you trying to hide
why do you look away
whenever i pass you by
why so many excuses
but you can never tell me why
you tell me all these things
and assume that they mean nothing
but when i show i care
i'm suddenly nothing,i'm nothing
you love me
you hate me
make up your fucking mind
you trust me
you'll be there
what are you trying to hide
Black and GreyBlack and Grey intertwineBlack and Grey7 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
To create something so divine
That white itself cannot blink
Even though it is the link
Happy ThanksgivingIn America, around this time today (1700 hours EST) many families have either gorged themselves on succulent feasts or are wondering if that damned turkey is ever going to thaw out. Burned rolls are greeted at the table with accepting smiles, and Aunt Mildred's mincemeat pie has once again befuddled the family as to what it's actually made of.Happy Thanksgiving6 years ago in Historical More Like This
Yes, America is once again celebrating that long ago event when Arnold Schwartenegger returned from the future and tried to kill us all and was soundly defeated. No wait... I'm being told it's a celebration steeped in more mystery than that. It observes the successful first winter harvest of our Pilgrim forefathers, foremothers, and foreoffspring way back in 1921. No, sorry... 1621.
The traditional story goes that boatloads of puritan British settlers braved the stormy Atlantic hoping for a new life free from religious persecution. They made landfall in what is now New England, whe
Kaiju Creepypasta: Baradagi Part 3: the Giant ClawKaiju Creepypasta: Baradagi Part 3: the Giant Claw2 years ago in Horror More Like This
I pointed over to the tape on top of the pile. It was completely unmarked, as were the rest. “Let’s check that one out first, shall we?” I asked.
“Fair enough.” Mumbled Arthur. He quietly popped the first tape out, and went into the next room, returning in a minute with a piece of masking tape and a sharpie. He slapped some tape on the edge of the cassette, and scrawled something on it before showing it to me. It read “B-Garasharp”
“The ‘B’ he explained, “marks proof of Baradagi. We might put something else on the tapes if more patterns pop up that we notice.”
I shook my head. “More patterns? You got any coffee, Red Bull, Mountain Dew? This could be a long night…”
He strode into the other room, but was back in a moment with several massive bottles of Mountain Dew in his hands and a big grin on his face. “There’s plenty more where those came from.” he chuckled as he set them in f
Elf vs. Orc 7This was easier said than done.Elf vs. Orc 78 years ago in Fantasy More Like This
She gave him some very practical suggestions about how to tie the ropes. A bit of slack between the feet, enough to shuffle, not enough to run. A rope around the neck as a kind of leash in case she attacked him. He could tell she'd done this sort of thing before.
Sings-to-Trees, at that point, would have been happy just untying her completely and pointing her in the direction of the outhouse, but he had a horrible feeling he'd disappoint her if he didn't at least try to hold up his end. So he steeled himself to stay awake a bit longer and got the ropes set up, and hauled her out of the bed.
Then she wound up needing to use him as a crutch anyway, since her knees kept buckling, so it was a bit of a moot point.
"Can you hold this?" he asked, handing her the leash rope after a few brutal hops toward the door.
"What if I try to escape?"
He sighed. "Just yank it if you feel yourself getting any ideas."
She started laughing, then they took another step and the
Top 10: Predictions for 2010Top 10: Predictions for 2010Top 10: Predictions for 20105 years ago in Humor More Like This
10. Sequel to smash-hit 2012 movie begins filming.
9. New DeviantArt "Personal Gropes" feature implemented. Thousands disappointed when it's revealed to be merely a typo of "Groups".
8. Global Warming is confirmed a hoax when giant space heaters are discovered in Antarctica.
7. "USDA American Beef" revealed to be made from recycled homeless people. Sales are unaffected.
6. Reality to be replaced with a cunning simulation, supported by clickable ads.
5. McDonalds releases new Happy Your Ass Up Meal, laced with antidepressants.
4. eBay accidentally auctions cursed relics from Hell, opening a space-time vortex in which Stephanie Meyer is a best-selling author with two movies made from her books.
3. Pirates vs. Ninjas debate settled once and for all when Johnny Depp is cast in Ninja Assassin II: Ninjas of the Caribbean.
2. Dan Brown's latest novel I'm Just Making Shit Up Now remains #1 on the best-seller list fo
Elf vs. Orc 6He got a nasty start a few hours later, when he came in to check on her.Elf vs. Orc 68 years ago in Fantasy More Like This
He'd tied her hands, her feet, thrown a loop or two around her waist, and roped everything to the bed, the chair, and the fire iron, just for good measure, He'd done everything short of hog-tying. She wasn't going to get loose in a hurry.
He wasn't sure why he was bothering, really, since he had a horrible feeling that if she said "Will you untie me?" he might do it, and if she said "please," he'd definitely do it.
Still, she didn't seem to be a threat conscious, so maybe that was okay.
Then, because his feelings were still churning and there was nothing for emotional turmoil like hard work, he'd gone off, fed the chickens and the gargoyle, picked peas, turned the compost heap, washed his hands and made soup. By the end, he was really quite exhausted, and ready for at least a nap in his chair.
Then he came back in to discover that her fever had vanished and she was shivering violently with cold.