maybe you never belonged to meI can still feel the weight of your lips on the curve of my collarbone. Sometimes, it feels paralyzing, crushing, absolute. Sometimes, it feels like home. Like everything.maybe you never belonged to me3 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
I once heard that when you can't fall asleep it means you're awake in someone else's dream. I wonder which one of us was dreaming that night, because everything was too quiet, too easy, too perfect. You used to fall asleep next to me, your body curled against mine. It's a warmth that's not easy to forget. A hidden smile tucked into pillows and sheets. It's easy to think these things will last forever when you're tangled up together. For me, the strings of my life will always be tangled up in yours. Forever tied to you. No matter hard they attempt to fray. To fall apart. To sever.
It's snowing for the first time this year. Soft and gentle, glittering in the sunlight, falling in large flakes, easy and quiet – nothing at all like the storm that rages inside of me, turning up the corners of my heart, throwing shrapnel
don't forget, you're beautifulthere's this girl i know, she's beautiful.don't forget, you're beautiful5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
she'd smudge black and blue
beneath her skin
and tell herself us it didn't hurt
[even when it did.]
there's this girl i know, she's beautiful.
she likes to flutter her eyelashes like the wings of butterflies
and pump golden sunshine from her heart
[the bones leaves go crunch with every step.]
there's this girl i know, she's beautiful.
her shoulders are strong like mountains but she's not unmovable;
her ribs are longer than they should be
and there's something strangely poetic about that
[but she's a master of hide-and-seek.]
there's this girl i know, she's beautiful.
her smiles and the laughter hits ceiling tops.
she's struggled for what she's now got
and she deserves every second he gives her.
[she just needs wants to be happy.]
these girls i know, i don't deserve.
they're beautiful and nothing can will ever change that.
angels and constellationsThere's cracks in the bedroom ceiling.angels and constellations5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
we looked up from our place on the ground as we slept on hard-wood floors
and claimed we could pin-point certain constellations
and we were dragging black crayons between the lines
because (for the first time) we wanted to prove something to ourselves.
We weren't out of minds just yet.
we shifted the bed to the other side of the room
and moved the dresser in front of the window;
to block out memories of the outside and all the hurt we'd felt before.
we'd sweep up dust-angels and watch them follow our lungs down.
We weren't ready to leave just yet.
incense would burn holes in our eyesight and fog our common sense
and we'd watch the smoke twist around our fingers all night long.
we were twirling and swirling and curling our toes
beneath the summer sun and glow of artificial light until we couldn't feel a thing.
i don't think we could support ourselves.
There's cracks in the bedroom ceiling.
and you left behind a letter addressed to what you saw in m
ravishi.ravish5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
these are the secrets we keep pressed against the skin of
your thighs and the confessions we dare not release past the
even rhythm of our pulses; this is everything our tongues keep
to themselves beyond the angles of lopsided secret smiles
these are the badges of honor we keep tucked on the insides
of our collars and in the rolls of our sleeves; this is the faintest
touch of my teeth leaving their mark on your clavicle and
the excuses we make when our distinctions are discovered
these are the memories we whisper to ourselves in stairwells
and private moments during the car ride home; this is you
closing your eyes and feeling the sensation of something greater
than friction building deep inside the spaces between your ribs
these are the movements our bodies have orchestrated and
rehearsed one thousand times with our eyes closed until we may
perform them with eyes wide open; this is resisting the arch
of your back against the most innocent of touches on your neck
i'm not one for apologiesthe earth is crashing down around me, the sky is sailing away and my tin can dreams are trailing behind it making as much noise as they can, screaming catch us if you can. i need a friend with talking hands, one who will say what they are feeling as their touch demands. my heart is sinking into my stomach like a billion grains of sand, i'm getting sick, time to turn over, my arms are too weak for hand stands.i'm not one for apologies5 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
i don't think you will worry but i'm insisting that you don't; i have made it my goal to get my fingers pinched in doors and my knees constricted by telephone cords. i plan on wounded trials and heavy empty hours displacing the air in my lungs until i wash up on indebted shores. i need a friend who doesn't see me as another chore, i'm getting sick, it's time to turn over, my immune system's too weak for any more.
believe me when i say i refuse to be a mess, believe that i am not romantic but an aphrodisiac at best. i can feel birth pains for something bigger, contracting within th
a world and starry eyesi. i will remember what you saida world and starry eyes5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
even if you try
to burn the words right off
your own lips and through my memory
ii. you can't hide
by dressing yourself in her shadow
insecurity doesn't look good on you.
tear yourself out and try something new.
iii. i tacked up all those smiles
while the wolves howled
between the spaces in my walls
the room's too small to handle these tears
iiii. i'm through waiting
for the silence to feel indifferent,
i'm with you
but you're not with me
iv. can we linger for this moment?
maybe these things will get better
though the rain does nothing for you,
it'll always wash me away.
you neverdarkness falls like shattered glassyou never5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
and lights are swaying,
distant tail lights
like dreaming dancers across the grass.
all the sounds are sad like midnight air
in my lungs, on my tongue,
in the desert there.
we're stepping silent down the road,
asphalt cold under our toes,
a thousand eyes up in the sky-
we're being watched, and
that's how you feel when there's
oh, i just want to pretend
there's no such thing as friendly fires,
you're lips are liars.
every time i fold my hands
the creases cut deeper in
until my skin suffocates my bones
and they gasp in harmony.
it's so hard to lose you now,
when i know now that i have lost.
how could i have thought that
this was just an easy win?
how could i have thought
you wanted in?
i was so sure i would be
pain-free. now i'm hurting myself.
how could i?
shadows stole itit would beshadows stole it5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
nice to wake up and see you
tangled in my sheets and
breathing my air and
being with me .
never has a pillow been so
never have eyes found peace in
constricted lungs and
never have i stared at
the shadows like
they stole my ability to
i can see so much life in you and
the shadows move with such swift accuracy
so fleeting but everlasting they are
even in the darkness where i cry myself to
Stars and CigarettesDear You,Stars and Cigarettes4 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
No one writes letters anymore, which is a pity because you can't burn an email from the ex. I might have told you that last night. Or maybe in a dream. Lying next to you, I dreamt of stars and smoke.
The world is ending like you said it would. It's choking.
I can't believe you weren't lying.
When we met, I was drunk (something I regret). But intuition tells me that you wouldn't have said hello otherwise and I hate that. I hate you too. You told me all your secrets because you knew I wouldn't remember, but did you know I would remember just enough to want to beg for more? I remembered enough to crave the taste of stars.
I hate you.
You liked how I smelled of cigarettes because it reminded you of home. We all get homesick but I saw how you pined to be there instead. Then you said you were a traveller. That was a lie, but I let you continue. You seemed like you needed someone, and I felt sorry for you.
Guilt feels bad, doesn't it? Poor exterminator.
I should have never let your
june 5thisn't it wonderful, the way we get swept up in this sudden gust ofjune 5th5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
air and light? one minute i'm wiping the wind out of my eyes,
the next i'm staring at you, wondering if i know what you're thinking.
you're another page of a book, only this book that i'm reading i hope is mine
because when you touch my hand i can't remember what i'm saying, and
when you watch me i feel so exposed- a bird in the open sky.
it's like looking at the whole landscape below while it looks back at me.
you're the boy that can make me laugh endlessly, that keeps me up all night
until we hear the one and only train that passes my house at exactly 2 am.
(it thunders down the tracks for five minutes. five minutes of silence and noise.)
you don't leave until the birds wake up to start singing. you are honest,
and i could listen to your voice for hours. sometimes your heart
gushes out your eyes or mouth and though you're a romantic, i think it is fitting.
it's you- who loves the rain but has clear blue skies in your
11:1111:1111:115 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
make a wish.
on an old guitar with no A string
and the strum of makeshift chords lingering in the air
as you pretend to make music.
he thinks you're beautiful,
coaxes your fingertips as you caress the strings,
you would do anything just to feel alive:
a kiss in the middle of a crosswalk,
two bodies intertwined,
you ache for euphony,
but the notes are out of tune.
make a wish.
on a girl with sunrise eyes
and a cigarette-lighter smile,
on a boy who sold love to the smoke shop for 5.99,
on your scarred palms
with the ghosts of whispered plans come to nothing
and dreams that die beneath the whirring neon lights
to the haunting lilt of a lone violin.
make a wish.
while you lie awake,
tangled in flimsy sheets
with emptiness pulsing below your breastbone.
the moonlight is golden-sweet,
and tastes like tears
dripping down hollow cheeks,
puddling in the dimple of an upside-down smile.
your heartbeat never lies:
is not, was not, will never be.
is not, was no
Would you?Would you?5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Would you still love me
When I grew old,
When my hair is gray
and white, thin?
When I no longer
Would you stay
by my side,
When I cannot recognise
who you are;
To remind me
each day, each hour
who you are
because I suffer from dementia?
Would you promise
to love me for who I am,
for who I will be in the future:
for better or for worse?
Heart MurmursThe air outside is negative 2 degrees right now and the snow isn't letting up anytime soon. I swear the spot I used to save for you in my bed is even colder because you're not there to hold my hand anymore. In fact, I haven't seen you in weeks and I'm beginning to lose hope I'll ever see you again. Even the dreams have started to fade off a little bit, just like the outer linings of my lungs because I seem to grow fonder of smoking the more time goes by that I'm only left with a memory of you instead of actually being with you.Heart Murmurs5 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Cigarettes have become my only source of warmth these days and alcohol my drink of choice because I would rather destroy my other internal organs first before my heart decides to win the race and wilt away first. My cause of death has started to take applications and I've never seen a job more desired besides the time I applied to love you with all I have. But that was back when I actually had something; now all I have is the empty bags of food littered o
i wanna know where you are.write how i feel? okay, this is how i feel.i wanna know where you are.5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
i miss you. you disappoint me over and over again, but i miss you. the way things are when i'm with you is just so fantastic i can't even explain what it does to me. i feel like the world is about to collapse when you're away and when you're here i can't gather the strength to breathe.
everytime my phone goes off i want it to be you. i have written letters in my head that i would love to say but i can't. i want you to text me or call me or drop by my house just to say all these words that i keep wishing you will. i want you to play me the song i told you to write for me and i want you to see me on the street or in askews and flip shit and drop what you're doing and come over to me and hold my face in your hands and kiss me like you did in the doorway before you said goodbye for the last time. i want your hand in mine and your head on my shoulder falling asleep in the back of my moms car and i want you to kiss me just below my ear and on my ne
confessionsI know you and I both hate the conceptconfessions5 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
and this is not a love letter
upon giving this to you, I will
vomit in eternal embarrassment
and regret giving it to you for the rest of my life, but
I have to do it.
You hate me.
To your knowledge,
I hate you back.
You are selfish and
You make assumptions about me
based only on the information
you gleam from my conversations
in the classroom
and you make it clear that you have
no intentions of correcting them
You are infuriating.
I don't love you
because this is not a love letter
But I like you.
You are beautiful,
with your short,
that distract from your intelligence.
You are a galaxy of
black night hair
twinkling star eyes
pale moon skin
and a bunch of other
bad space imagery to
simply fucking gorgeous
And your face
with a contemptuous sneer that is
always for me
just pulls me in.
But I don't
Young and SimplisticWe would always go to the same place,Young and Simplistic5 years ago in Emotional More Like This
our own secret spot out by the river,
but not because it was romantic.
Sneaking around was exciting in itself,
and we were forced to get creative;
to have an adventure.
We'd sit silently at first,
like what we were about to do was wrong.
You were different;
eager yet charmingly polite.
You never pushed but you were always ready.
I was absolutely in love with you then.
I remember the days the rain would be pounding down on your POS pick-up truck,
and we'd steam up the windows.
It used to make you laugh.
And the days I thought I would die of heat exhaustion...
yeah, those were the times we'd jump into the water.
You'd start shivering and I would make fun of you,
Wow, some lifeguard
can't even stay in the water for more than five minutes!
But you knew then that I was joking.
I wish things didn't have to get so serious,
I miss how we used to be.
the pittsburgh pulsei'm not a city boy.the pittsburgh pulse5 years ago in Emotional More Like This
i don't know what brought me out here, to a city that has a heartbeat and rumbles so thoroughly that when you lie awake in bed at night, it's almost as if you can feel it rise and fall with every breath it takes. i'm useless at falling asleep to something else's heartbeat because it begins to drown mine out and i forget the feel of mine and i forget if i was ever alive to begin with. lately every morning and every night begins and ends with the city's pulse and i can't remember the last time i heard my own blood pumping through my own veins.
i've started living in my own head to get away from the clutter of the city blocks. i take four steps outside my door and I'm already somewhere else. i've forgotten the feeling of walking onto my backyard porch and spreading out beneath the stars when i couldn't sleep at night. the thing about cities is that the only thing more forgotten than the grass is the stars, and if i can't see them when i've lost myself i don't think i'l
Excerpts from Him and HerI couldn't have done it without you.Excerpts from Him and Her5 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Couldn't have done what?
Make my lungs spit out oxygen so I'm able to breathe and my fingertips shoot sparks into the sky to light up our world and make my feet move one at a time, one in front of the other so I don't fall flat on my face.
I hurt myself last week.
[She showed him the marks on her upper thighs, They were etched in there with such precision and there were no signs of hesitation. It made him wonder how many times she had carved bitter memories into her skin before.]
I don't understand. How could you do such a thing?
It really doesn't hurt if you know what you're doing and you weren't there to stop me. You're never there when I need you, you know. What else am I supposed to do?
[As much as it hurt him, he knew she was right. He always showed up just too late and would leave a bit too early. He never had the right thing to say and didn't know when to just let things be. But, for some reaso
s o m e h o wWait.s o m e h o w5 years ago in Emotional More Like This
I am not
wallflowershe wasn't one of those peoplewallflower5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
she was the girl
that worked at the corner
smiled real nice when she handed
you your change but
never said much of anything
she was the girl
that always sat by the window and
just by looking at her you
knew she wasn't
really there, not
in the sense
that she could see you
or hear what you said even
if she tried; she
was always far away
and when it came time for school
she was always the girl
that sat out
with her quiet smile and
never said much
and wasn't really there,
but still she looked so pretty in
her dress and no one really talked to
her because she was so good at not
and at her funeral
everyone came even though
no one really knew her,
and everyone was real quiet and
walked away not really sad but empty
and when they got home
everyone went back to
their lives and
forgot her name.
time fractures and blank pagesyour morning smile is so widetime fractures and blank pages5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
it'll break my heart later on.
it reminds me of arrows and the light drumming of heartbeats.
light seeps into the walls and
dawn dyes your eyes, heavy-lidded.
the day is golden.
good morning, beautiful.
you've got me thinking that
maybe i'm not invincible after all
when you begin to resemble the cheshire cat in the afternoons.
Just sinking into clouds made of cotton candy
that will turn your teeth into dust.
i'll be patient but you've never been good at re-appearing.
when the afternoons dies
and we are waiting for the birth of night;
you sink into the spaces between my rib bones
and we acknowledge the facts laid bare;
that the cracks in my heart were forming
before i knew what hurt really was.
the afternoon has passed it's expiration date
so you threw it out for a new sky.
you're looking like a con artist tonight.
[hey buddy, wanna buy a watch?]
spare your time to just look over here
because i'm not your buddy
and time proves to be useless and irrelative o
COLLAB: Chamber of SecretsWe can hide down in the cellar and play truth or dare like we did when we were little kids.COLLAB: Chamber of Secrets5 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Silently, the secrets will brush past us in the darkness of this vault that we disguise ourselves in.
"i could shatter your world at any second. tell me, pretty darling, does that scare you?"
Your hair smells like the first time I kissed you when we were 8 and your mom let us camp out in the backyard. We exchanged ghost stories and I scared you half to death. Ever since then, you cling on to me when it's dark out.
lips graze across one another amidst the skeletons of our closets; the atmosphere of this chamber is suffocating. your lips maintain the same ability to capture me with surprise, the way they did so many years ago.
"slowly, i'm shaking. the power you maintain over me is terrifying. knowing that at any moment, you could crush me; it's so intimidating, yet, for some reason i trust you."
"I can only hope I don't make a fool of you like all those who misplaced their trust before. I've kept
I Want to WriteSometimes I think that the mountains surrounding the valley are like a cage, keeping me from the rest of the world, as though this insignificant town has a hold on me. But then sometimes I wonder if maybe those mountains are protecting me from the great big world out there until I'm ready. I think I'm ready. Am I ready? The more I think about it, though this small town life is all I really know, the more I want to go and see it all. I want to go, leave, travel and never stop. It's not like life here is bad, I have many good things here like friends, but I think sometimes it isn't enough for me. Sometimes I think I want to leave, but I know I need to at least finish school. I'm not ready, not quite done yet.I Want to Write5 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
I'm a good writer. My friends tell me, my teachers tell me. I think I take it for granted, it comes naturally to me and I don't realise that some people have trouble with it. I understand words. I understand my language. I know how words should flow and where they should
something beautiful.tonight, i will write for you something beautifulsomething beautiful.3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
from the corners in which you have flung me.
this lion-heart of mine is hungry again,
devouring light-lidded men who once dreamed
of galaxies -- this is nucleosynthesis:
we are stars, we are dust, and i am humbled, proud.
the sea does not sigh, tonight. the moon
hides her face whilst motherless nimbostratus beg
the wind to marry them, weeping when he leaves --
he leaves, spurning trees who ache to hold him.
somewhere it is snowing: thick, heavy, soft.
it is in my lungs, cooling my throat as it threatens
to tear itself raw. tonight, my hands are pressed
to my sternum as i hold my own breath still,
knowing you rest beneath open windows.
these secrets are optimistic. they are full,
spilling over, tying close distance between us.
this is sacrifice: i am offering to you the worst,
the best, of me. fearful, they rest tenuous,
stretched taut through phonelines, fierce,
they do not submit. tonight, instead, i set them free.
i have forgotten wha