100ThemesChallenge - DarkDoesn't everything seem more real in black and white photos? That's because the world's losing it's colour.100ThemesChallenge - Dark3 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
100ThemesChallenge - LoveDespite what people may think, not all guys wants a stick thin barbie doll with a fake smile and dull eyes. I like girls who curve. Girls who when you put your arms around her, feel like they fit perfectly against your chest, not like you're hugging a stick. Homely girls. The ones that wear soft cotton shirts and sweaters, and have a warm smile and eyes you can get lost in. The ones that walk around with a smudge of flour or toothpaste or paint on their shirt all day because they haven't noticed or just don't care. The ones whose apple-vanilla smell you could recognise from across the room, but still never becomes mundane. The ones who, when100ThemesChallenge - Love3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
Solitude With Falling LeavesI'm terrified to stop writing, because when I do I'll have to think about all the things that are slowly killing me.Solitude With Falling Leaves3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
The YouthMy youth was found in disgusting apartments and palest blue ribbon. Kissing girls that were years older than myself, lying about my age and passing out on the bathroom floor. I started smoking, I started lying, things were going great. I felt better than I ever had, line after line, bed after bed, I never did too much and was on top of my game, always one step ahead of even myself. But soon there would be nothing new to do. Everyone would know my name, my sins and who I slept with.The Youth3 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
Oh the price of being young.
The Way I Live NowToday I got a haircut. I bought a new shirt, I scraped the mud off my best shoes. The good night's sleep erased dark circles from my under eyes, and for the first time in years my skin is clear, healthy rather than the sallow grey of a drug addict. My mouth stretched back in the pretence of a smile that was almost real. I've put on weight - fat now fills the gaps between my ribs and my face is no longer dominated by hollow circles for cheeks.The Way I Live Now3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
So yes, I may still have that scar through my eyebrow, and my joy still doesn't quite reach my eyes. And my knuckles are still grazed from that fight, and my eyes are still that deep grey of grief, and
And Tonight My Prayer Was XIIIAnd tonight my prayer was:And Tonight My Prayer Was XIII3 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
You once asked me: "Why do you look to the ground when you walk?"
"So I can see where I am treading." I said. "Why do you look to the sky?" I, equally bemused.
With a smile you reply "So I can see where I'm going."
And Tonight My Prayer Was XAnd tonight my prayer was:And Tonight My Prayer Was X3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
So today the brightest green of new buds met the clearest blue of the sky. And the blue met the yellow of a freshly picked daisy, which brought with it the clearest white of newly fallen snow. With them travelled the soft pink of a child's cheek, blended with the black of a starless night and the orange of this summer's brightest midday sun. On the road the purple of heather ran alongside as dog to his master. And as they moved on together, they left our world the bleakest grey.
Only then did we notice we'd chased all the colours away.
The MothsAll the broken people sway as oneThe Moths3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
To the pulse of the music.
They hover in the neon light like
Moths attracted to a fluorescent flame,
Gulping down vodka as though it's sugar water.
And it burns
But not as much as the searing self-hatred.
Their minds spin and soar above reality
Until they laugh and buzz and scream
With the euphoria of sweet freedom
Too soon their wings are ripped off,
Leaving them with vague memories
Of superficial happiness and stains on their
Pretty white dresses.
The Child WatchesThe sun in my eyes felt like someone was kicking me in the jaw. I was so high I thought my eyes would fall out. Standing shaky on the thinning grass, I realized I had to catch the train home. I ran 5 blocks and got there just as the operator was locking the front compartment. Resting up on the 701, with the sterile light slipping beneath my eyelids. Puerile breathing in front of me. I open my eyes and am being stared at. Eye contact with a child is always easier than eye contact with an adult. Adults always look away quickly, embarrassed of their booming thoughts, convictions, judgments. Children stare straight at you and lay it all out on thThe Child Watches3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
The Seperation FadesI know that a few decades from now, I won't be able to picture the freckles on your shoulder so clearly they might be before my eyes, and I wouldn't remember the curve of your smile, and your face won't be the first thing I see every morning.The Seperation Fades3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
And that scares me to death, but it keeps me going.
Dishwater EyesI have been thinking of new ways I can kill the lights,Dishwater Eyes3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
swimmingly musing the flicker switches in the back of your head
like paying the bills,
and doing the dishes as our children slumber above.
The dishwater is cold, lapping around my heels as I dive
inside your irises and try to figure the prices
of your thoughts;
only to get frustrated with your laziness statistic.
I think I floundered, flapped and drowned;
enveloped in your weariness as I paddled for the shore
of your embrace,
and came up gasping for relief.
The kitchen sink was rusted and overused
from too many table-side taunts,
picking away at my membrane, leaving only
i n f i n i t eThe last thing that I thought about before the car hit me on that rainy day where Clara's eyes, those eyes that could take me to any other place than I was right now. They could take me to the bluest ocean, where the millions of bubbles tickled my skin and moved through my hair as they made their way to the surface. They could take me high above the treetops, where time would almost seem to stop as every single square inch of my body tried to absorb the beauty around me. They could take me through the Milky Way, watching the stars shoot by and lighting up my eyes as they took my breath away. Yes, it was Clara's eyes that could take me a millii n f i n i t e3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
The Room In The CityLately, the drinking's been getting worse.The Room In The City3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
I spend most of my time sitting in my room reading Nietzsche.
The voices have been talking louder, shouting, screaming at me.
I am fascinated by the simplest of things; the turn of the washing machine, the grain of wood.
I can never stop thinking, about all the little things and about how they don't matter. How nothing matters.
I lie in bed talking to all the people who never were, listening to the music no one's ever played.
My body is a piano, full of black keys only. I am in a country where everyone's face is different from mine, and language is the act of not speaking, and noise is everywhe
The DifferencesI watched the faces of the Jury as they looked at him and I saw the same expression I've seen a thousand times before. That mental distancing, that subtle acknowledgment that there is something wrong with that boy.The Differences3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Because he doesn't interact the way they do.
Because he doesn't grieve the way they do.
Because he doesn't move, or speak the way they do.
I watched the faces of the Jury, and knew they had already decided his fate.
Something You Can't FixWe're in the woods, just the two of us. I have on my best trainers, the ones with rainbow laces and the place on the back that Max chewed through when he was just a puppy. Your steps are bigger than mine but it's a game I try to jump into the hole your shoes leave behind. I'm a frog; I'm a kangaroo; I'm magic.Something You Can't Fix3 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
"My legs hurt" I tell you
"It's just a bit further."
You sit and pull me down beside you, point through the undergrowth "Do you see it?"
I shake my head and you pull me up, pushing towards a tree until I climb. "The pond, do you see the pond?"
From up here, I can. It is a fractured, jagged edge lying on the ground.
The Distancing FictionI am the physical embodiment of a story. Every time I move my arm or open my mouth or words stumble off of my tongue and I make a fool of myself, it's another page, another sentence, another scene in a story I'll tell later, at some later date, as if all of that is in the past, behind me now. But that's a big lie, like most of the stories I tell, and I'll just continue writing it all with the swaying motion of my tongue and arms and lungs.The Distancing Fiction3 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
I tell stories sometimes to relate, escape, entertain, and connect with others. But mostly I tell stories because, as a child, I realized that nothing would properly convey the way that I felt, what I want
The Sorry LetterDear Chiyaa,The Sorry Letter3 years ago in Letters More Like This
Pain in my heart would not subside... The hurting within I could not hide... no matter how much I tried not to love you anymore but I still do! And I just can not hate you...
My twin soul!
I admit, it is indeed true...
You never know what you've really got untill it's gone...
Chiyaa you were always fragile as a rose and beautiful as a moon but I guess, you and I were never meant to be together... I don't know my state, but I do know that am lost deep down inside myself... The burning, the yearning cannot cure itself but I do not wish that it would cure... The only thing I desire at the mo
You Will LearnAfter some time you learn the difference,You Will Learn3 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
The subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning,
And company doesn't always mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts,
And presents aren't promises.
And you begin to accept your defeats,
With your head up and your eyes ahead,
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build all your roads on today,
Because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans,
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn, that even the sun burns if you get too
WallsPellets of water hit my skin, so hot they almost burn. I wish they did. Then I could peel off the skin, the layers naturally made out of self-defense. No, I can't stand to be so vulnerable, raw. So these walls build up and I'm left inside with unsolved issues and confusion. So hollow. Sturdy from the outside, my walls are made of brick. I imagine they're hard to break into, although no one has ever tried. I've never broken out, whether it's lack of motivation, strength, or maybe just an odd feeling of content. I get lonely in the prison I've created. Sadness and anxiety stop by from time to time. They tackle parts of my defense. When they leaWalls3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Little Price To Pay For YouThe whole way home I thought of blueberries and blood; indelible things, and wondered how long it took for a soul to come clean.Little Price To Pay For You3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
The Way I Told HerYour voice is screaming towards the heart of others, but doesn't depend on its own self. Can't you see that you're digging yourself straight into your own grave? I can tell you one thing and one thing only. Are you ready? Everyone is bound to be alone and when they're dead and gone. Tell me one thing; what will you have then? Who will have you then?The Way I Told Her3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
Unreverberant PainThe scars have faded once again...Unreverberant Pain3 years ago in Emotional More Like This
I know that their absence means there's something wrong that there's something that I lack. Because the pain still runs through my body, yet I am unable to find its source... You know what I want to scream... Scream till no sound comes out... Scream until i hoarse... It is weird, because a frustration is welling deep within... Raging!! Demanding to be freed... I write again, I know this would raise questions in my life even from your side that WHY? But I do not desire to keep this silent... So should I take a knife and give this unreverberant pain a cause? A source which everyone can easily see...
How to Forget.I think the high is setting inHow to Forget.3 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Because the lights aren't any dimmer
But I can't see you.
My eardrums are still in tact
But I can't hear you.
And I'm in no state to judge my mentality,
But I can at least hope that I'm not going insane.