Pen Parodies of Potter 1Pen Parodies of Potter 17 years ago in Humor More Like This
Ginny: *playing cards with George* HAH! I PWN JOO ALL! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Ron: Seriously, Ginny. Calm down! Harry's insanity must be really rubbing off on yo--
Harry: *is upstairs* NOOOOOO! *storms downstairs, wrapped in a towel* OKAY! WHICH ONE OF YOU BASTARDS USED MY SHAMPOO!?! WHO DID IT???
George: And there we go. Ginny, I'll ask you again and again. Dump Harry and go out with me!
Ginny: But we're siblings...
Harry: SOMEBODY'S GOT TO ANSWER ME!
Ron: *edges towards door*
Harry: RON! *grabs Ron and sniffs his hair* HOW COULD YOU!?!
Ron: *wimpers* Well... I always liked your hair... and it was sitting right there...
George: *grabs Ginny and snogs her*
Harry: HOW DARE YOU USE MY SHAMPOO!&
Pen Parodies of Potter 3Pen Parodies of Potter 37 years ago in Humor More Like This
Snape: Five points from Gryffindor.
Masked figure: Severus... WILL YOU SHUT UP ALREADY!?!?
Snape: Five points from Gryffindor. Five points from Gryffindor.
Masked figure: IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY!?!?
Snape: Five points from Gryffindor.
Masked figure: Okay... I am going to MURDER the person who taught me this spell... Once I find him.
Snape: Five points from Gryffindor. Five points from Gryffindor. Five points from Gryff--
Masked figure: SILENCIO GODDAMMIT! Ahh... That's better.
Snape: *stares blankly*
Masked figure: Come, Severus. We have things to do.
Snape: *is still staring blankly*
Masked figure: Aaargh! This is hopeless! Mobilicorpus! *points wand at Snape and walks off levitating him*
Pen Parodies of Potter 6Pen Parodies of Potter 67 years ago in Humor More Like This
Dumbledore: ... That's disturbing..
Hermione: What is?
McGonagall: *points out window behind her*
Harry: YOU DO THE HOKEY POKEY AND YOU SHAKE IT ALL ABOUT..
Ron: He even got the song wrong..
Ginny: Urgh.. What's that smell...
Harry: SORRY, SMEXHY-TITS!
George: *shivers* He's got a problem.
McGonagall: *wincing* Thank god the students are all in classes now..
Dumbledore: Hm.. I've got to think about this.. Why don't you subdue Harry again, then come back up here?
Hermione: Uh.. Sure. Sir.
Harry: RUN, RUN, AS FAST AS YOU CAN! YOU CAN'T CATCH ME, BECAUSE I'M THE HARRYBREAD MAN! *runs*
Ginny: Hoo boy...
Masked Figure: *crouching behind Whomping Willow* Now, Snape!
Snape: *walks forward dumbly* 5 points from Gryffindor. 5 points from Gryffindor. 5 points from Gryffindor.
Pen Parodies of Potter 7Pen Parodies of Potter 77 years ago in Humor More Like This
*Some random cave...*
Harry: What was that, sweet thang?
Harry: Hm.. I say... you're coming up with more creative swear words by the day..
Harry: But now, I've got you all to myself... >333
Hermione: Hee.. This is stupid.
George: You're alive...
Fred: Yeah. I know.
Fred: Well, Georgie boy, it's not nice to bury your twin brother alive..
George: Say what?
Hermione: So what's up with Snape?
Snape: *in fridge* 5 points from Gryffindor. 5 points from Gryffindor.
Fred: Silencio! That, my dear Hermione, is my revenge.
Harry Potter and PieHarry liked pie. No, he loved pie. Harry loved pie so much, that he ate it every morning before breakfast, during breakfast, before and after lunch, for lunch, while he pooped, while he peed (this of course affected his aim), and while he ate pie. Yes, it was a horrid cycle. And yes, Harry was an awfully plump lad.Harry Potter and Pie9 years ago in Humor More Like This
One day, Harry's biggest fan Vivienne came to Harry and said, "OMG! Lyk! Harry! OMFG! Lyk! U're sooooo FAT! OMG!!!!!!!111oneonewun"
Harry was sad. He cried…a lot. Vivienne was sorry. She fed Harry pie. Harry was happy again.
"I'm srry 4 lyk callin u ugly."
"You never…called me UGLY!"
"I mean, stupid!"
"You never called me STUPID!"
"Well u r." * sneer*
Harry slapped Vivienne.
Vivienne killed pie.
Harry needed pie.
Pie was dead.
Harry was crestfallen. With a lustful cry of passion Harry leaped onto Vivienne with a dagger. Vivienne screamed, "PERVERT!" and ran. Harry was sad. He had no pie. He had no Vivienne.
Pen Parodies of Potter 4Pen Parodies of Potter 47 years ago in Humor More Like This
Ron: He's gone mental...
Percy: Why do you think he's suddenly acting this way, Hermione?
Hermione: Well.. We suspect Voldemort's been resurrected. Then, he started having strange dreams, and now...
Ron: He sings like William Hung.
George: What should we do with him?
Ginny: *rolls downs stairs and crashes onto concrete floor* MMMMPH! MMMMMH!
Ron, Percy, and George: *run towards Ginny and untie her* Ginny!
Hermione: *stands up and turns* Oh my god! What happened to you?
Ginny: I was alone in my room, when a hand suddenly clamped over my mouth. The next thing I knew, I was unconscious in my closet, and I heard Harry's voice!
George: What was he saying?
Pen Parodies of Potter 11Pen Parodies of Potter 117 years ago in Humor More Like This
Abe: You call that a uniform? YOU CALL THAT A UNIFORM!!!!!???
Ron: *squeals* W-what uniform?
Abe: The traditional rugged look of a bartender, you ninny! BARTENDIOUS CINDERELLITIUS!
Ron: Aaah! What the [CENSORED] am I wearing??
Abe: It's called a uniform. GET OVER IT!
Abe: You call that a grunt! I'LL SHOW YOU A GRUNT!
Ron: Oh, boy.. *covers ears*
Abe: Now.. Let's see you wash a wine glass.
Ron: Okay! *grabs wine glass and scrubs under hot water*
Abe: No, no, no! You're doing it all wrong! Never, NEVER USE THE WATER!
Abe: THEY'RE CALLED T-O-W-E-L-S, BOY!
Ron: Aren't they a little.. unhygenic?
Abe: THAT'S NOT OUR FUCKING CONCERN!
Ron: O.o *thinking* What have I gotten myself int
Pen Parodies of Potter 9Pen Parodies of Potter 97 years ago in Humor More Like This
Molly: You're WHAT!?
Hermione: You're WHAT!?
Arthur: You're WHAT!?
Percy: You're WHAT!?
Ron: *wincing* Geez.. I'm becoming a bartender! Is that such a crime?
Molly, Hermione, Percy, and Arthur: *all together* YES!
George: Oh don't worry about them, Ron. I'm proud of you. *mutters* We both are.
Molly: And you, young man! We need to have a word about who you get to molest!
George: Say what?
George: *muttering* I am going to kill you, Fred..
Molly: What was that?
Percy: *randomly* Hey! Let's all play Truth or Dare!
Ron: Great idea! 8DD
George: I'll start. Dad... Truth or Dare?
Arthur: .. Dare.
George: *grins evilly* Okay.. I dare you to... *bends and whisprs in Arthur's ear*
Arthur: *eyes widen*
George: Well? Or are you too much of a LOSER t
Pen Parodies of Potter 10Pen Parodies of Potter 107 years ago in Humor More Like This
THE DAILY PROPHET
Wednesday, July 25
Severus Snape Sighted!
Severys Snape, notorious killer of Albus Dumbledore, and widely believed to be dead at the hands of the former Tom Marvolo Riddle, has been spotted near the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmeade Village!
"He was right there..." gestures a startled Madam Rosemerta, outside her pub last night. "He was walking... zombie like, and saying the same phrases over and over. I panicked, then disapparated. The Ministry was startled by my sudden appearance, but listened, and immediately returned to the spot I described. Then, Severus had gone!" According to Rosemerta, the only phrases he uttered were "5 points from Gryffindor", 'Stfu', 'Shut up you Slytherin bitch', and 'Silencio'.
Harry Potter, well known wizarding hero, gives his word that Snape only killed Dumbledore at Dumbledore's own request. But just how sane is he?
Hokey Pokey, Harry Potter