1. Bananas are good. 2. Watch out for women named Jackie, they slap. Hard. 3. "Go to your room" are terrible last words. 4. Be silent in The Library. 5. Fear of the dark is NOT irrational. 6. Don't blink, blink and you're dead. 7. Travelling with the Doctor is not safe; however it is the journey of a lifetime. 8. Statues of weeping angles are dangerous. 9. The Doctor is rubbish at weddings, especially his own. 10. The Doctor does not appreciate being called "Doc". 11. The Doctor likes the word fantastic and brilliant. 12. A strange man in your bedroom does not mean anything can happen. 13. Lots of planets have a north. 14. If you meet an eccentric man who says his name is John Smith, the wise thing would be to get away as fast at you can. It's not the most fun though. 15. The Doctor is good at accents. Rose is not. 16. The Doctor came first in 'Jiggery Pokery'. 17. 'Tainted love' and 'Toxic' are earth classics. 18. 'Toxic' is actually a Ballad. 19. The Doctor can bring down a government with a single word . Oh, sorry, my mistake: it was six. 20. The Last Human was a trampoline. 21. The Doctor loves a happy medium. 22. The Master never really dies. 23. Neither do the Daleks. 24. The Cybermen are equally resistant, although extermination seems to be effective. 25. "Mickey the Idiot" isn't so much of an idiot after all. 26. The Doctor does not do domestic, unless it's Christmas and Rose asks him to. 27. Remember when the Doctor kissed Martha? That was not a kiss, it was a genetic transfer. 28. Everyone knows who Harriet Jones is, even the Daleks. 29. The Doctor hates hospitals, unless they have a little shop. 30. You gotta love Rose even the Daleks like her! 31. Cell phones really do interfere with some instruments. Those of a Tula Warship for instance. 32. The Master loves silly songs. 33. The words "You Are Not Alone" can change the world. 34. The Doctor hates guns. 35. Upgrades are not good. 36. Do not try to make the Doctor human, it . complicates things. 37. Do not make the Doctor angry. 38. Donna is a Supertemp. 39. Never say never ever. 40. Always turn left. 41. Some things are worth getting your heart broken over. 42. Safe and Saved are two very different things. 43. Queen Elizabeth the First does not like the Doctor. 44. Shakespeare flirts a lot. 45. The globe is not actually a globe, it's a tetradecagon. 46. Beware the Ann Droid. 47. People in Doctor Who like to explain how their name is spelled. 48. Lynda with a Y is sweet. 49. People don't vote for sweet (well, people from her time anyway). 50. Captain Jack Harkness naked in front of millions of viewers? Your viewing figures just went up! 51. Sometimes, the Doctor runs out of kindness. 52. Of course a screwdriver should be sonic! 53. Don't buy a gun that requires batteries, they tend to run out at the worst moment possible. 54. The Doctor loves blowing up other people's jobs. 55. The Doctor likes to play Santa. 56. The TARDIS can actually fly! 57. The Doctor failed on his TARDIS-piloting exam. 58. You really don't wanna know where Jack hides his laser guns. 59. Most girls (and guys) don't actually mind when Jack flirts with them, it's just the Doctors prudishness, really. 60. The Doctor can actually dance. 61. Rose really needs a Doctor 62. Bad Wolf is not a bad thing. 63. You will never actually see the planet Barcelona. 64. The Doctor wants to be ginger. 65. Sadly, he is a bit rude, and not ginger. 66. Rose likes pink. 67. Jack flirts with anything with a postcode. 68. The Doctor is worth the monsters. 69. Do not try to pronounce the word "Raxacoricofallapatorius". You will fail, and the Doctor will laugh at you. 70. Queen Victoria was not amused . Actually, she was so un-amused, she declared the Doctor and Rose enemies of the crown. 71. The entire British Royal Family are werewolves. 72. Given the right incentive, Jackie Tyler could beat a werewolf. 73. Tin dogs can be very useful. 74. Spare hands are useful, don't throw them away. 75. Playing on people's most basic fears; a clear sign someone is possessed by the devil . or a good psychologist. 76. Allons-y and Alonso go very well together. 77. 5 million Cybermen? No problem for the Daleks. One Doctor? They'd run screaming if they had legs. 78. Daleks actually can go up stairs. They can fly, remember? 79. The Doctor likes to say the word "what". 80. He also apologises a lot. 81. The Doctor does not appreciate being called "Martian". 82. They had global warming back in the middle ages. 83. One should never meet ones heroes. 84. Human-Dalek hybrids completely ruin the Daleks' image. 85. Sad = happy for deep people. 86. Time is not a strict progression from cause to effect it is actually more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey . stuff. 87. A paradox created by the Doctor meeting himself could blow a hole in the universe the exact size of Belgium. 88. Jack's Vortex manipulator is a space-hopper, the TARDIS is the sports car of time travel. 89. The Doctors tenth regeneration is kinda cheeky. 90. There is a disturbingly large possibility that Jack is actually the Face of Boe. 91. During WO II there were at least five versions of Captain Jack Harkness present in Great-Britain: - The Original, whose name Jack stole. - A Jack working for TORCHWOOD. - A Jack who meets the Doc and Rose for the first time. - A Jack in a cryogenic chamber at TW - A Jack who had accidentally travelled back in time and met the original. It's a bloody miracle he didn't meet himself!! And kinda sad, really, two Jacks is better than one. 92. The Doctor and Donna are NOT married! 93. Agatha Christie is brilliant! 94. In the Doctor's life, not everything happens chronologically. 95. Nothing is impossible, no matter how many times you say it is. 96. Sorry, can't say: spoilers! 97. T-A-R-D-I-S. It stands for Tethered Aerial Release Developed In Style! NOT! 98. Another regeneration, and you know what? He's still not ginger! 99. Geronimo is a nice word. 100. Generated anomalies are brilliant! 101. One word: RUN!!!!!
Okay, my best friend and I were talking about this little list, and we realised I forgot something very, very, VERY important. So here is rule 101.b:
Hurtling through time and space, Can he ever find a place? Jumping forward to a brand new earth, Jumping back to an empty hearth. Forward again to see the Face of Boe, Back in time to meet an old foe. He is pursued by an incessant fact, The likes of which he can't take back. His entire home, his people his soul, All gone, leaving him without a goal. The last of the Time Wars, The end of his kind, He is trapped by those bars, But what is he seeking to find? Solace he finds within one girl, The likes of whoms story unfurls. Constant companions, best friends, equals, Even through their occasional squalls. It is she for whom he sought, And for she for whom he fought. The man of whom I speak is he, The last of the Time Lords, The Doctor
Well, I don't know. I was feeling emo today and I am watching the Doctor Who Confidential so, I figured, why not?
I'm not a great shakes at poetry and well yeah.
edit: i know the forat is odd but they didn't provide a center option.
Because of course we missed him. Because he knows the Lion King. Because he recognises the taste of A Positive blood. Because he's rude and not ginger. Because Jackie needs to shut up. Because it's very British to have tea when the world's coming to an end. Because everyone knows who Harriet Jones is. Because he's certainly got a gob. Because Jackie says the name of the show just before the opening titles run. Cheesy.
Because of the apple-grass. Because he's slim... and just a little bit foxy. Because he's still got it. Because he's beating out a samba. Because telepathy means 'a face full of big head'. Because the Face of Boe is 'textbook enigmatic'. Because the Doctor says 'new' at least 17 times.
Because David Tennant got to do an episode in his normal accent. Because Rose has been 'oot and aboot'. Because Queen Victoria is not amused (finally). Because the telescope is 'pretty'. Because Rose didn't have any silver bullets. Because the Doctor won't abuse his responsibilities as a traveller in time for five quid. Because he will for ten. Because he is very attached to his thumb.
Because he knows where Aberdeen is. Because K9's been upgraded. Because Mickey needs K9 to remind him that he is in a car. Because they need to 'forget the shooty dog thing'. Because the Doctor will never say 'correct-a-mundo' ever again. Because he's expecting happy-slapping hoodies with ASBO's and ringtones. Because Mickey has pigtails and a frilly skirt. Because the Lock Ness Monster trumps Werewolves. Because the Doctors says 'physics' 9 times.
Because Arthur is a good name for a horse. Because monsters have nightmares about him. Because bananas are good. Because he truly is a lonely angel. Because the Doctor let Rose keep Mickey. Because he's Mr. Thick Thickity Thick Face from Thicktown Thickannia. And so's his dad! Because he didn't want to say 'magic door'. Because he's worth the monsters. Because one must tolerate a world of demons for the sake of an angel. Because the droids do not require Reinette's feet. Because the Doctor wasn't actually drunk. Even though he had a tie on his head.
Because he knows exactly what he's doing... Because if you want to know what's going on, work in the kitchens. Because kicking the TARDIS helped and it hurt. Because the Doctor says 'surrender' five times in about ten seconds.
Because the Doctor is the only genius in the room. Because Mickey learned to fly a blimp on a Playstation. Because the Doctor makes everything up as he goes along - brilliantly. Because Mickey's slightly less of an idiot.
Because she's goin' his way, doll. Because there's no other way to go, daddy-o. Because he has a scooter. In his TARDIS. A scooter in the TARDIS. Because he swears by rubber soles. Because he can't wrap his hand around his elbow and make his fingers meet. Because the Doctor isn't surprised that Jackie dated a sailor. Because only an idiot hangs the Union Flag upside down. Because the Doctor is the King of Belgium, apparently.
Because Rose likes 'The Bitter Pill'. Because she likes Protein One with a dash of Three. Because no one knows the gender of the Ood. Because the Doctor dislikes trapdoors.
Because they're the stuff of legend. Because the Doctor says 'gravity schmavity'. Because it's 'so human' to go where angels fear to tread.
Because the Doctor says 'Raxicoricofallapatorious' twice. Because the twin planet of Raxicoricofallapatorious is Clom. Because there's a big absorbing alien over there, and Rose is having a go at Elton. Because of the massive difference between the red and blue buckets. Because the Doctor needs a spade.
Because Rose is following a copper's hunch. Because the Doctor's not a cat person. Because everything's coming up Doctor! Because after carrying the Olympic beacon to the stadium he yells 'WHOAHOHOHOHOO!' Because edible ball bearings are genius.
Because the Doctor ain't 'fraid o' no ghosts! Because he has a reputation to uphold. Because, for some reason, no one asks about the 3D glasses.
Because upon hearing the Doctor's name, the Daleks stagger backwards slightly. Because... come on! Daleks vs Cybermen - GENIUS! Because the Daleks have no concept of elegance. Because of the Doctor's little laugh in the Sphere Room. Because of his expression when Donna appears on the TARDIS. Because "The Doctor will open the Ark!" Because "The Doctor will not!" Because they finally ask about the 3D glasses. Because Rose says "I love you". Because we all knew what the Doctor was going to say. Because... just because!!
I sat down, watching Series 2, and thought "This is so brilliant!!" as I usually do, and so wrote this xD
This isn't a final thing, if you read this, and think that there's something obviously fantastic that I've missed, then please let me know! This has been written episode by episode, so starting with the Christmas Invasion, and finishing with Doomsday.
'Because the Doctor wasn't actually drunk. Even though he had a tie on his head.' was suggested by ~CuteziAngel Thank you!
I don't own Doctor Who, or its characters - BBC does.
I only wrote this to share my love for the Second Series And because David Tennant is awesomesauce.
Who are you? You with the big, curly hair You with the poison lips You with the sad, sad eyes Can't tell them Can't spoil the ending But It's more than that Because Nobody REALLY knows you Not your mother Not your father Not even your own husband (Wait, is he even that?) You really don't know Your life has always been Full To The Brim With 'Spoilers' Your childhood spoiled Your sanity spoiled Your chances at being normal spoiled Your love life spoiled Everything spoiled Because, You love the Doctor with Everything You Have And Everything You Are But he doesn't love you back -Not in the way you love him- He thinks of you as A child His killer A mystery (and, mostly, a nuisance) Yes, To HIM you're just A child, who was forced to grow up much too fast His killer, who is in search of his forgiveness A mystery, that he is always itching to unravel (and, usually, a nuisance, who goes flying off to 'save' him when he is "in no need of saving") Your husband-for-lack-of-better-words (you know) Is somewhat right (But is also somewhat wrong) Because You are a child without a true childhood His killer who never killed him A mystery to even yourself (and, often, a nuisance who can't really tell right from wrong from left from right) But, You also have come to think of yourself as other things Using new titles like: The Bride-Without-A-Groom The Woman-Who-Is-A-Child The Sometimes-Willing-Prisoner The Best-Friend The Girl-With-The-Wrong-Name The Girl-With-The-Wrong-Name The girl with the wrong name Because, That's the truth You have Never Ever In Your Entire Life Been called by your Real Name You have been called: Melody Pond MELS The Girl Professor Doctor River Song But You Have Never Been Called Anything (at least, not anything REAL) Because, You don't have any REAL documentation (You don't REALLY exist) You don't have any REAL parents (You, in all honesty, were the one who REALLY raised them) You didn't have a REAL wedding (Unless you count that time -in a, now non-existent, bubble universe- when neither of those wedded spoke their real names) And "Look into my eyes." Is NOT a name Neither is "Doctor" (But, neither are any of yours, for that matter) Because, You Know You Are Wrong (And you want a mummy who will hold you when you cry) -And you want a daddy who will punch anyone anything that tries to kiss you or hurt you- But, you don't REALLY want a husband Not if your husband is HIM He makes everything Feel So Wrong And you just want RIVER SONG To go and die And Never Ever Come Back (not never) -not in a million years- Because RIVER SONG Is not REAL If you were REAL, you would be The Wonderfully Ordinary Melody Williams And There would be No Such Things As 'Spoilers'
What better way to improve a bad day than by thinking up jokes about Doctor Who?
Now, I'm pretty sure that I came up with most of these, but some of them were fairly obvious and so it's entirely possible that someone else thought of them first. No plagiarism intended if that is the case.
1. The Doctor always stays out of trouble. 2. The Doctor does not look human, humans look Time-Lord. 3. He's the Doctor, he's worse than everybody's aunt. 4. The Doctor never interferes in the affairs of other people or planets, unless there's children crying. 5. Fish fingers with custard are a culinary delight. 6. The Doctor is most definitely a madman with a box. 7. Always trust the Doctor. 8. Even the Doctor makes a mistake sometimes, that's what he needs his companions for. And of course because everyone needs some company. 9. The TARDIS is sexy. 10. Don't touch a cookie in the TARDIS, they are dangerous. 11. Compared to travelling with the Doctor, the London Blitz is a safe place to be. 12. The Eleventh Doctor has a way of having absolutely brilliant ideas, and then going about them all wrong. 13. Amy is awesome. 14. The new Daleks look like a bad version of the Power Rangers; they just got a few colours wrong. 15. Cracks in walls can be very dangerous. 16. The Doctor has photographic memory. 17. Vampires + Venice + The Doctor = EPIC win! 18. Daleks don't have an honest bone in their body wait, sorry, they don't have any bones at all. 19. The Doctor seems to have taken a liking to giving people/beings nicknames. 20. The Supreme Dalek goes by 'sweetheart'. 21. blue = stabilizers = booooring 22. Angels are not nice. 23. The TARDIS is not supposed to make any sound when it lands, the Doctor always leaves the brakes on. 24. Never ever put the Doctor in a trap. 25. The Doctor points and laughs at archaeologists 26. Being clever isn't easy. 27. The Doctor usually saves the day by doing something incredibly stupid and dangerous. 28. Impossible = 2 minutes work. 29. The Doctor is good with time but that doesn't stop him from constantly being late. Especially at weddings. Especially his own. 30. The Doctor likes comfy chairs. 31. The Eleventh Doctor likes bad puns. 32. As long as the Doctor is talking, the plan isn't finished. 33. Sorry, can't tell you, still spoilers. 34. The Doctor is still thick it just never goes away, even regenerating doesn't help. 35. I can't stress this enough: Non whiney Vampires (so, get lost Edward Cullen!) + Venice + the Doctor = EPIC win! 36. The Doctor loves 'big mining things'. 37. Don't stick your hand in holes in the ground. Ever. 38. It's not breaking and entering, it's Sonicing and entering!!! 39. The Doctor always makes perfect sense, if you don't get it, you're just not keeping up. 40. The Doctor needs silence. 41. The Doctor isn't scared of monsters, the monsters are scared of him. 42. Don't diss the sonic! 43. Never 'shush' Amy. 44. "Hello sweetie" are two of the most epic words in the universe. 45. They are especially nice when graffitied on the oldest cliff side of the universe. 46. River had a valid reason for doing it, really, he wasn't answering his phone! 47. Between Rose and the Doctor, there is one hell of an age gap (they still work though) 48. The Doctor actually WAS right! His name is Ricky..... in a parallel universe that is. 49. Bowties are cool. 50. So are Fezzes. 51. "Everything is going to be fine." .............Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. 52. River can fly the TARDIS..... she's actually better at it than the Doctor. 53. You probably can't trust her.... then again, where would be the fun in that? 54. The Doctor is like a space version of Gandalf, or at least, that's what he thinks. 55. Rory and the Doctor are Amy's boys. 56. If you die in reality, you're dead. That's why it's called "reality". 57. The Doctor love's saying things he's never said before. 58. A thing is better than a plan. 59. The Doctor really does not like violence.... however he does shoot guns. 60. River hates good wizards in fairy tales, they always turn out to be the Doctor. 61. Are you my mummy? 62. The Doctor is not a dinner lady. 63. Anything you can do, Jack can do better. 64. He snogged Madame de Pompadour. Rose was not happy. Madame de Pompadour was. 65. Just what you needed to make your day: a Dalek with an identity crisis. 66. Spacestation 1 = satellite five = the gamestation = TROUBLE 67. Never underestimate plumbing. 68. Don't come too close!!!! 69. Just a reminder: RUN! 70. Oh yeah, and don't wander off Pond!! 71. Buffalo 72. Massive heat + massive body = MASSIVE bang 73. The Doctor only takes the best. 74. Mauve ; the universally recognised colour for danger (us humans are just weird) 75. Rose likes spock. 76. Mummy? 77. There's a time and a place.... not that Jack cares about that. 78. So many species, so little time.... 79. The Doctors nose has special powers, his ears however.... don't. Even though they're big. 80. Just scan for alien tech already. 81. Dance, anyone? 82. The Lion King just keeps popping up!!! 83. Just in case: Pond, put some trousers on! 84. Amy and Jack should never EVER meet. 85. Neither should Jack and River.... 86. And most definitely not the three of them together... *runs and hides* 87. Early days: the steering's a bit off. 88. Yes, of course the swimming pool is IN the library. 89. Don't ask stupid questions. 90. They can shoot him dead, but he'll have the moral highground. 91. The Doctor is married (to his TARDIS), so back OFF (Yes River, you too). 92. Sexy! 93. What's so difficult, it's JUST quantum physics..... 94. Monsters, start to run. The Doctor is making a house call. 95. Scariest place in the universe: a child's bedroom. 96. Melody friggin Pond?! You have GOT to be kidding me. 97. THOSE were the bloody Silence?! 98. Children.... they're still rather scary sometimes... 99. Astronauts are NOT supposed to come from underwater people!!! 100. He's like a nine-year-old trying to rebuild a motorbike in his bedroom. And he never reads the instructions. 101. She might not have always taken him where he wanted to go, but she always took him where he needed to go . 102. The Doctor is still worth the monsters.
the full title is to supposed to be Ode to David Tennant - A Rage By Two Fans as you can see in the beginning. in any case, this i was made up by me and my friend while we were watching Doctor Who. just to point out, we have no real animosity toward the woman who played Jenny being Tennant's wife, we're just expressing our views a little... metaphorically. please take no offense Who fans or Tennant/Jenny romantisits. we're just pissed off he didn't consult us :anger:
anyhow, yes i realize it doesn't all coincide nor does it have references matching but it's just a bit of fun and if you're going to be all blah about it then go somewhere else.
RANDOM DOCTOR WHO PLOT GENERATOR! Based on the 'Time Lord: Journies' PDF's Random Journey Generator
HOW TO USE THIS PLOT GENERATOR: This plot generator just gives you the basic details of a plot, not a full-fledged synopsis. Keep in mind, you won't always need to roll for all categories, except when a previous roll requires you to.
Requirements: A six-sided die (D6) At least a little imagination
ROLL A THEME: First roll to find the theme group, then roll again to find the theme within the group. On a result of 5, reroll to get a Theme and double the number of locations over which the story takes place. On a 6, reroll for a Theme twice, applying both results, with the first as the Main Theme and the second as a Subplot.
THEMES 1 1 Alien Menace 2 Altering History 3 Ancient Powers 4 Arch-Enemy 5 A World Gone Mad 6 Beauty & the Beast
THEMES 4 1 Temporal Paradox 2 Extra-dimensional Creatures 3 Traitor 4 War 5 Whom Gods Destroy 6 The 'X' Doctors
Alien Menace: (Adversary) terrorizes or subtly invades (Location) in order to (D6):
1-2 Conquer 3-6 Acquire (Object).
Altering History: A time traveling (Adversary) tries to alter the history of (Location) in order to (D6): 1-2 Conquer 3-4 Trap The Doctor and Companion(s) 5-6 conform the future to their vision.
Ancient Powers: Powerful and ancient entities are awakened by (D6): 1-2 The Doctor and Companion(s) 3-4 (Adversary) 5-6 Innocents.
The Powers threaten the Destruction of the (D6): 1-4 Planet 5 Galaxy 6 Universe.
They can only be stopped by (D6): 1-2 (Object) 3-4 Macguffin* 5-6 Special (act of self-sacrifice, a dance, the word Bgthyrssf, etc.)
Arch-Enemy: A personal (Adversary) has set a trap for The Doctor and Companion(s) at (Location). The plan is unnecessarily complex and involves (D6): 1-2 A subplot. Roll another Theme to determine what it is. 3-4 Another (Adversary). 5-6 Both a subplot and another (Adversary).
A World Gone Mad: The universe is not the way The Doctor and Companion(s) left it. Either theyve ended up in another dimension of a bizarre nature or history has been so altered as to be unrecognizable. The is due to (D6): 1-2 Bizarre Natural Phenomenon 3-4 Equipment Malfunction 5-6 An (Adversary)
Beauty & The Beast: The (Location) is inhabited by two distinct peoples, one beautiful and the other hideous in appearance. They are fighting over (D6): 1-2 (Location) 3-4 (Object) 5-6 Ideology
Looks can be deceiving, however, and the side of right is actually (D6): 1-3 The Beauties 4-6 The Beasts
Chase: (Adversary) is chasing the (D6):
1-3 The Doctor and Companions 4-6 Other Character(s)
They seek to gain (D6):
1-2 (Object) 3-4 Capture of the characters they are chasing 5-6 Revenge
Environmental Action: Environmental hazards (volcanoes, asteroids and such) and/or pollution threaten to destroy (Location). It is caused by (D6):
1 (Adversary) 2 (Object) 3-4 Nature 5-6 Stupid/Mad/Power-hungry People
Historic Adventure: The Doctor and Companion(s) experience Earth during (D6): 1 Pre-history 2 Greco-Roman Times 3 The Dark Ages 4 The Renaissance 5 Colonial Times 6 Late 19th/early 20th Century Roll for another theme to serve as a Subplot.
Intrigue: The Doctor and Companion(s) and other innocents get caught between a subtle power struggle between (Adversary1) and (Adversary2) involving betrayal, assassination and political subterfuge. The object of their struggle is (D6):
The Doctor and Companion(s) must determine who is right and deserves their help while avoiding the wrath of both sides and protecting innocent bystanders. The bad guys are (D6):
1-2 (Adversary1) 3-4 (Adversary2) 5-6 Both
Invasion: (Adversary) overtly invades (Location) in full force for (D6): 1-4 Conquest 5-6 (Object)
Mad Scientists: A brilliant Scientist or group of scientists attempt to change (Location) with (Object) for (D6):
1-2 Good (although the intention is misguided and doomed to failure) 3-4 Power 5-6 Roll another Theme to serve as a Sub-plot.
Mistaken Identity: The Doctor and Companion(s) are mistaken for someone, something or some god. Roll up another Theme to serve as a Subplot.
Parallel Universe: The Doctor and Companion(s) have ended up in a universe opposite of their own due to (D6):
1-2 Bizarre Natural Phenomenon 3-4 Equipment Malfunction 5-6 An (Adversary)
In order to return to their own universe, they need (D6):
1-2 Help from (Adversary) who is friendly/good in this universe. 3-4 (Object) 5-6 To wait patiently for the problem to correct itself. Roll a Subplot.
Quest: The Doctor and Companion(s) are sent on a mission that will take D6 separate adventures, each with its own Subplot, to complete. The source of the quest that links the stories together is an (D6): 1-2 (Adversary) 3-4 (Location) 5-6 (Object)
Rightful Rulers: A race/species is trying to regain rightful control of their (D6):
1-2 Land 3-4 Planet 5-6 Interstellar Empire
Their enemies are (D6): 1-3 (Adversary) 4-6 Other Members of their Race/Species.
Survival: A race/species has been reduced to a primitive culture on the edge of extinction by (D6):
1-2 Natural Disaster 3-4 Their own negligence. 5-6 (Adversary)
Technology is (D6):
1-2 Shunned as the cause for the current state of affairs. 3-4 Enshrined and utilized in a religious fashion by an elite order. 5-6 Totally non-existent. Roll another Theme to serve as a Subplot.
Technology Gone Wrong: Advanced machines/robots turn on their creators due to (D6):
The Doctor and Companion(s) must determine the best course of action while avoiding the wrath of both sides and protecting innocent bystanders. The bad guys are (D6):
1 (Adversary1) 2 (Adversary2) 3-5 Both 6 Neither. The war has been instigated by (Adversary3)
Whom Gods Destroy: Powerful beings imprisoned, whether by accident or by the design of others of their race, seek to free themselves and restore themselves to their former glory. Roll another Theme to serve as the Subplot by which the being seeks to realize their escape
The X Doctors: Extraordinary circumstances lead to the meeting of multiple incarnations of the Doctor. This gross violation of the Laws of Time is being instigated by (D6):
1-2 The Time Lord High Council 3-4 The Celestial Intervention Agency 5-6 (Adversary)
Roll a Subplot to determine the reason multiple incarnations of the Time Lord have been brought together. Whatever the Subplot, it should be considered a major threat to time and space to necessitate such a violation.
ROLL AN ADVERSARY: Roll a D6 to find the appropriate table below. Further information on specific results can be found after the tables. On a result of 5, the Adversary is allied with a second Adversary. On a 6, a second Adversary is involved, but is at odds with the first Adversary.
ADVERSARIES 4: 1 Sabalom Glitz 2 The Master 3 The Meddling Monk 4 The Rani 5 Lady Cassandra 6 Create a New Adversary
Autons: Whenever the Autons are involved, whatever the story Theme, one of the Nestenes main goals will be to create a host body to inhabit and breed with.
Cybermen: If the theme of the story is not overt, as in Invasion, the Cybermen are likely to remain unseen, manipulating events from behind the scenes. Until they are sure of achieving their goals, theyll use traitors, spies and Cybermats to weaken their target before revealing and risking themselves.
Daleks: Whenever Daleks are involved, there is a 50% chance that Davros is also involved. If there are two Adversaries and both rolls turn up Daleks, then the adventure involves both the Imperial (led by Davros) and Renegade Daleks and both factions are automatically opposed.
Judoon: Whenever the Judoon are involved in an adventure, it will always be due to some sort of extraterrestrial crime, roll a new adversary to determine their targeted species.
Slitheen: The Slitheen will not directly show themselves in their plots, preferring to disguise themselves using the bodies of the planet's native species. This Raxacoricofalipitorian buisness family will also show little interest in anything not regarding their financial benefit.
Ood: Ood are used by Humans for slave labour, as well as house servants. Ood are almost always non-violent creatures, unless they are controlled by some psychic force, in which case the Ood will turn murderous towards their Human masters.
Ice Warriors: Any Ice Warrior Expedition will be led by an Ice Lord.
Mechanoids: As these robots are mainly found building cities on potential colony worlds bereft of human life, they are unlikely to be involved in a great many of the Themes or Sub-Plots presented without the involvement of some other Adversary. Therefore, unless the Theme is Survival or Technology Gone Wrong, assume that the Mechanoids are a secondary Adversary and roll again to find a primary Adversary. They will never be aligned the primary Adversary, or anyone else unable to provide the proper colonization codes for that matter.
Movellans: Whenever the Movellans are about, there is a 50% chance that Daleks will also be involved in the adventure at some point, and in opposition to their mission.
Ogrons: Ogrons are incredibly stupid and almost always in the employ of someone else. Unless you want to run them as an individual group of space pirates or the like, they are serving (D6):
1-3 The Daleks 4-5 The Master 6 Create a new Adversary
Sea Devils/Silurians: As these two are kindred species and there is a 50% chance that where one is involved, the other is as well. In such a case, a single Silurian Triad will lead the Sea Devil warriors. Furthermore, as the two species have never (to the best of anyones knowledge) left Earth, any rolls for Location should be restricted to Location group 1. Soldiers: Soldiers will be part of a larger force led by a General, King, or other leader, who should be customized to fit the storys Main Theme. Alternately, another Adversary might lead the Soldiers.
Sontarans: Whenever Sontarans are involved, there is a chance that the Rutans are nearby as well. Roll to determine if the Rutans are present.
1-2 The Rutans are present 3-6 The Rutans are not present.
Vashta Nerata: These creatures are incredibly dangerous, and are only found in areas where there is animal life, as well as trees.
Yeti: This result refers to the robotic Yeti used by the Great Intelligence and not the shy creatures they are patterned after. The Great Intelligence is assumed to be present as well, but if a second Adversary is also about and capable of control through psychic or technological means, feel free to have them controlling the creatures instead.
Zygons: The Zygons will have a spacecraft secreted at the bottom of a large body of water, which serves as their HQ and also contains their Body Print machinery and the people they are currently duplicating. They will also have a Skarasen in the same body of water.
Great Race: This result refers to a race of beings whom are technologically and/or evolutionarily far in advance of most other species, possibly even more advanced than the Time Lords. Examples include the Daemons, the Great Vampires, and the Eternals. Stats are pretty much unnecessary and you can assume that for the most part, direct confrontation will be fatal for the characters.
Sabalom Glitz: Being a highly unscrupulous and amoral character, Glitz has been known to work for others in pursuit of his own schemes. There is a 50% chance that he is working for another Adversary whenever he is encountered. Otherwise, Glitz is not actually an adversary creating the problem or opposing the characters, but merely looking to make a few Grotzits out of the situation. In this case, there is a 3 in 6 chance that Mel is with him and will be henpecking him to change his ways throughout the entire adventure.
The Master: In any adventure involving the Master, he will always be considered the primary Adversary and any other Adversaries will be pawns in his plans. He will most likely be working behind the scenes and will not reveal himself until found out. If, at any point, he realizes a Time Lord is involved, however, he will most likely make his presence known in some way, even if only to them. He will always reveal himself to the Doctor in this way.
The Meddling Monk: The Monk always leaves anachronistic clues to his presence whenever he is about, especially in the area surrounding his TARDIS.
The Rani: Unlike the Master, the Rani is uninterested, for the most part in wild schemes of universal power and is much more interested in her own research. As an Adversary, she will most likely be merely taking advantage of or exacerbating an already present situation for purposes of her work (obtaining test subjects and the like) but will not be the actual direct cause of it. If she is the direct cause of the current situation, then she will have the coerced assistance of another alien species. Roll another adversary or create your own to determine this species.
Lady Cassandra: When Lady Cassandra is present, she must be aided by at least one additional character to keep her moisturized. Her goal will be to keep on living, as well as to be powerful or rich.
Create a New Adversary: Create a new enemy, the possibilities are endless!
ROLL A LOCATION: Roll a D6 twice. Location details may be found following the tables. 1-2 EARTH 1 The Americas 2 United Kingdom 3 Europe 4 Africa 5 Asia 6 Remote Places 3-4 PLANETARY 1 Sol System 2 Primitive Tech World 3 Modern Tech World 4 Future Tech World 5 Adversary Homeworld 6 Gallifrey
5 SPACE 1 Asteroid Base 2 Planetary Base 3 Orbital Base 4 Deep Space Station 5 Starship 6 Generation Ship
EARTH The Americas: Your adventure takes place on the American continent. Roll to find out where (D6):
1-2 Canada 3-4 The United States 5 Mexico/Central America 6 South America
United Kingdom: Your adventure takes place in the United Kingdom. Roll to find out where (D6):
1-4 Great Britain 5 Scotland 6 Ireland Europe: Your adventure takes place on the European continent. Roll to find out where (D6): 1 France 2 Germany 3 Spain 4 Italy 5 Russia 6 Scandanavia Africa: Your adventure takes place on the African continent. Roll to find out where (D6):
1 North Africa 2 Sahara desert 3 African Plains 4 African Jungles 5 South Africa 6 Madagascar
Asia: Your adventure takes place on the Asian continent. Roll to find out where (D6): 1 The Middle East 2 The Indian Sub-continent 3 China 4 Korea 5 Japan 6 Southeast Asia Remote Places: Your adventure takes place somewhere on Earth far removed from the usual traffic of humanity, perhaps even devoid of a human presence altogether. Roll to find out where (D6):
1 The North Pole 2 Uncharted Island 3 Charted Island 4 Antarctica 5 Under the Ocean 6 Under the Earths Crust
The Sol System: Your adventure takes place in or on one of the other planets (or one of their moons) revolving around Earths sun, Sol. Roll to find out which (D6): 1 Venus 2 Earths Moon 3 Mars 4 Europa 5 Neptune 6 Pluto Primitive Tech World: This is a world inhabited by an alien species or regressive Earth colonists with a lowlevel of technology. Roll to find out their Earth equivalent technological level (D6): 1 Prehistoric 2 Bronze Age 3 Greco-Roman 4 Middle Ages 5 Renaissance 6 Colonial Modern Tech World: This is a world inhabited by an alien species or regressive Earth colonists with a level of technology roughly equivalent to Earth during portions of the 20th and early 21st centuries. Roll to find their maximum Earth Equivalent tech level (D6):
1-2 Late 19th/Early 20th century 3-4 Mid 20th century 5-6 Late 20th/ Early 21st
Future Tech World: This is a world inhabited by an alien species or Earth colonists with a high level of technology, including star-craft and energy weapons.
Adversary Home world: The story takes place on the home world of an Adversary rolled up in the Adversary Section.
Gallifrey: The Story takes place on the home world of the Time Lords.
Asteroid Base: Your adventure takes place on a base built into an asteroid. Roll to find out the asteroids location (D6):
1-2 In an asteroid belt. 3-4 In orbit around a planet. 5-6 Deep space.
The purpose of the base is (D6):
1-2 Military 3-4 Trade/ Starship refueling 5-6 Medical
Planetary Base: The story takes place in and around a base on an uninhabited world The purpose of the base is (D6):
1-2 Military 3-4 Trade 5-6 Leisure
The Planetary environment outside the base is (D6):
1-2 Hostile (due to atmosphere, flora, fauna, etc.) 3-4 Barren (nothing but rocks, mountains and more rocks) 5-6 Terrestrial
Orbital Base: The story takes place in a station orbiting a planet. Roll on the Planetary Table of the Locations Section to determine what kind of planet it is orbiting. The purpose of the base is (D6): 1-2 Military 3-4 Leisure/ Starship refueling 5-6 Medical
Deep Space Station: The story takes place on a station located at least one light year from the nearest solar system. The purpose of the base is (D6): 1-2 Military 3-4 Trade/ Starship refueling 5-6 Medical
Starship: The story takes place on a starship in flight. The starship is a (D6): 1-2 Warship 3-4 Courier 5-6 Civilian Liner
Generation Ship: The adventure takes place aboard a very large starship that is transporting either colonists or the remains of a civilization on a voyage through space that will last many hundreds of years before they reach their final destination. The ship is completely self-contained, a mini-world that provides everything the passengers and crew need. Roll to see if the who or what is awake on the ship (D6):
1-2 All humanoid life on the ship is in cryogenic suspension. 3-4 The passengers are in cryogenic suspension, but a self-aware computer actively runs the ship with the aid of robotic servants. 5-6 The whole place is alive and kicking.
If awake, the passengers on the ship (D6):
1-2 Have forgotten their origins and reverted to primitivism. 3-4 Remember their purpose, but have forgotten how to run their ship. 5-6 Remember their purpose and can operate the ship.
Intruders are (D6): 1-2 Killed 3-4 Captured 5-6 Welcomed as guests.
STRANGE LOCATIONS Dyson Sphere: Your adventure takes place in a hollow sphere built around a very small star by a long extinct race of beings. The interior surface of the sphere is a self-contained terrestrial world, complete with an atmosphere, continents, oceans and abundant life. Roll to see if there is sentient life present (D6): 1-2 Ruins are all that remain. 3-4 There is a Primitive society. Roll on the Primitive Tech World table for their Tech Level. 5-6 There is a Modern society. Roll on the Modern Tech World Table for their Tech Level. Ringworld: The story takes place on the surface of a humongous artificial ring, built by a highly advanced race and encircling a star. The surface of the ring is terrestrial, containing an atmosphere, continents, oceans and abundant life. The ring has two sides: one in permanent daylight, and the other in permanent night. Roll for each side to determine what sentient life is present there (D6):
1-2 Ruins are all that remain. 3-4 There is a Primitive society. Roll on the Primitive Tech World table for their Tech Level. 5-6 There is a Modern society. Roll on the Modern Tech World Table for their Tech Level.
If both sides contain sentient life, roll to see how they regard each other (D6):
1-2 As only legends, usually involving the other side being banished. 3-4 As deadly Enemies, both sides fighting along the edge of the ring. 5-6 As simply different, with much trade between the two.
Hyperspace: The story takes place in the realm between universes, normally only used for FTL travel. Roll another Location to determine where in Hyperspace the PCs end up. This will normally be a ship of some sort, but it is not unknown for whole planets to slip into and become trapped in Hyperspace due to some bizarre (sometimes intentional) chain of events.
E-Space: The TARDIS has slipped through a C.V.E and ended up in ESpace (Exo-Space), a universe discovered by the Doctor and parallel to NSpace (Normal Space, i.e. our universe). If this location result is rolled, treat the Main Theme as a Quest result, with the objective being to escape back to the normal universe.
Outside Space/Time: The TARDIS materializes in another dimension outside of Space and Time, such as the Land of Fiction, the Celestial Toyroom or the universe of anti-matter. The particulars of the dimension, such as who runs it, how one may leave it, etc. are left to the Referees fiendish imagination
Bizarre: The TARDIS lands somewhere incredibly weird, like a Cartoon dimension, inside the body of a planet sized living creature, shrunk down to molecule sized so that they enter a micro-universe, etc.
ROLL AN OBJECT:
OBJECTS 1 Mineral 2 Biological Abilities 3 Slaves/Breeding 4 Ancient Tech 5 Unique Tech 6 Adversary Tech
Mineral: This is a specific mineral, possibly gold, iron or something more exotic, like Taranium or Zyton-7.
Biological Abilities: This is some sort of lifeform, or part of a lifeform, with special qualities. These qualities might be medicinal, nutritional, some form of poison or something more exotic, such as relative immortality, the ability to read minds or enter the Space/Time Vortex unaided by technology.
Slaves/Breeding: A sentient race is the object, either as slaves for manual labour/ testing purposes or for breeding. Breeding stock might be necessary because an Adversary is parasitic in nature (as in The Invisible Enemy) or because the Adversary has run out of breeding partners of its own race and has found that the Object species is biologically compatible
Ancient Tech: This is knowledge and/or technology from an ancient and highly advanced race, which may or may not be extinct.
Unique Tech: The target race is known for being highly skilled in a certain technology, perhaps with such mastery that they can do things within their specialty that exceeds even the abilities of the Time Lords in that area (as with the Logopolitans). The Object is that knowledge and/or technology.
Adversary Tech: Certain bits of knowledge and/or technology belonging to the Adversary, such as canisters of Movellan Virus or Dalekanium, are the object in question.
*MacGuffin: a generic technological object with one primary purpose, such as the Key to Time, or the Glove from Torchwood.
They were all gathered in the Master's newly recovered TARDIS. He'd hidden it at the end of the universe and with the help of a stolen Vortex Manipulator, the Master bounced off to retrieve his beloved TARDIS. Now he decided to celebrate by implementing another scheme to screw with the Doctor.
"Ah, good to see my old faces again," the Master with the silver hair says to his other incarnations. The rest of them nod back to him and mutter small greetings. "And my new one?" He looks at the smiling blonde Master.
"Explain why we are here," the Master with the gray goatee asks the blonde one.
"To play a little game with the Doctor, of course." The blonde one smiles evilly.
"You would risk a massive paradox just to play another game on the Doctor?" asks the one with the black goatee.
"Of course we would," the one with the slicked back hair and the American accent says. They hear a grunt of agreement from the one under the black hood, the smelly corpse one.
"Very well," Gray Goatee says. "Which Doctor are we playing with? Or were we going to pull all of his incarnations out of time?"
"No," Blondie says. "Just one."
"Which one?" Silver Hair asks.
"I say we go with mine," Gray Goatee says. "The Doctor in his third incarnation is rather amusing."
"No, let's go with sixth," Black Goatee says. "He's so much fun to play with. His clothing is just perfect to poke fun at and he gets so mad when you rip it."
"They all get mad when you rip their clothes," Blondie added.
"I want to choke his fourth with that damn scarf," the Corpse grits out.
"Mine has lovely curls that I would love to rip out," the American said, grinning. Silver Hair just sighs.
"I think we'll go with mine," Blondie says. "So as not to wreak too much havoc on the timelines. Besides, I know you'll all like this one, his tenth incarnation."
"Oh, and why do you say that?" Gray Goatee asks. "He can't be much different from the others."
"Oh, but he is," Blondie answers with a manic grin. "Let's just say that something happens to make his personality a little darker, no matter what incarnation comes after."
"The Doctor is never dark," sighs the American.
"Like I said, something happened to make him hate himself beyond anything we could imagine. He's also quite adorable, if slightly mad," Blondie says, smirking. "And so fetching and spine chillingly sexy when he's angry. It's also quite gratifying to make him cry."
"A spine chilling Doctor with a dark personality, who cries and is also adorable?" Gray Goatee raises his eyebrows, sceptically. Blondie smirked.
"Now that I simply must see," Black Goatee chimed in.
"Good. Now that's settled." The blonde Master rubbed his palms together and went to the center console of his TARDIS, it looked a bit like the Doctor's Console Room, just different colors. "Let's get him over here," he muttered. "Give him a good injury right away, make him less likely to get away before the fun. And you lot can see that adorable quivering lower lip." The Blonde Master pouted his own lower lip for emphasis. He punched in a few numbers, his fingers racing across the keys. "Oh, I can't wait to see his face when he sees all of me here."
"What kind of injury?" Gray Goatee asked.
"A few broken bones, hopefully. Nothing serious."
"And how are you going to deal the injury?"
"Like this," was all Blondie said and hit a button.
The teleport device worked just as it had for all of the other Masters' arrivals, but for one difference. The Doctor flashed into the Master's TARDIS Console Room, thirty feet in the air. He fell with a surprised shout and landed on his back with a loud clang on the metal floor, in his blue suit and his long brown coat. The impact making him cry out in pain.
"Oh," Gray Goatee said. "Good one." He nodded in approval, stroking his goatee. Blondie smirked and chuckled.
Reeling from the impact, the Doctor rolled a little side to side, one hand on his low back. He breathed heavily through clenched teeth, eyes squeezed tight. He couldn't see or even care where he was at the moment, he was in too much pain. He mentally assessed his injuries to find a couple broken ribs, deep bruising and several cracked vertebrae, as well as a very large, angry and possibly bleeding lump on his head.
He opened his eyes slowly, wincing at the light. He saw the people gathered around him, then he saw who the people were, then he realized that they were all there at one time. He then noticed that he was there himself, and he was alone. Just one Doctor but six Masters, how is that fair? He gawked at the assembled Masters, open mouthed and speechless, for once.
"Hello, Doctor!" Blondie squatted and patted the Doctor's cheek a couple times.
"Master," the Doctor muttered. The Doctor saw the ripple of pleasure that went through all of them when he said their name, even the Corpse. "What have you done? Why have you done this?" He tried to sit up but Blondie stood and stopped him with a boot on his sternum. It was uncomfortable to the Doctor's broken ribs, the Master pressed down with his foot making the Doctor wince.
The Masters all drunk in the sight of the Doctor's lower lip, quivering from the pain. It really was adorable.
"We just want to play a game with you, Doctor," Blondie said, smirking evilly. "Maybe a few games." He licked his lips.
"Oh, please!" the Doctor snorted. "Don't you have anything new to try for a change. I'm getting sick of the games, Master. Really! If you're going to kill me, kill me. So I can regenerate and get on with my life. If you're going torture me, then do so. If you're going to turn me into a wrinkley old man, or a hobbit, then get it over with."
"A hobbit?" Gray Goatee mumbled.
"You spoil all my fun, Doctor." Blondie smiled. He stepped over the Doctor and sat all of his weight on the Doctor's bruised body. The Doctor groaned at the pain. "The games leading up to the torture and death and regeneration are the best part." He tweaked the Doctor's cheek with his thumb and forefinger.
"Please don't do this," the Doctor asked, looking the blonde Master in the eye.
"Oh, and the broken record starts again!" Blondie smirked. "We are gonna have so much fun tonight Doctor!" He snapped his fingers and music started to play, Get The Party Started by Pink. A look of terror overtook the Doctor's sharp features, the blonde Master cackled when he saw it and stood, pulling the Doctor to his feet by his lapels. The Doctor winced and sucked in a breath through his teeth when he felt the pain shoot through his body, his broken ribs having moved from the shift in weight.
The Corpse Master and the Master with the black goatee grabbed the Doctor's arms and dragged him through the door leading to the depths of the Master's TARDIS. All of the Masters were smirking, following down the corridors.
The Doctor could do nothing but be dragged to Rassilon only knows what fate the Master had in store for him.