Dear Yaoi Fangirls: I Hate YouDear Yaoi Fangirls: I Hate You9 years ago in Editorial More Like This
I hate yaoi fangirls, and I am one.
You may be looking at me with tears in your eyes right now and saying, "Why Chopstick... why?!"
Well, I'm gonna tell you why.
1. You're just writing about them because they're hot.
Let's just forget that they hated each other in the game. Let's completely forget that both of them were completely straight and had loving girlfriends in the anime. And heaven forbid I bring up the idea that they were really "just friends" in the manga. I'm not really bitching about drabbles or crackfics so much as I am the fifty-page-long epics that completely ignore canon.
AND I MEAN COMPLETELY.
Rinoa was just so whiny and Squall and Seifer were just SO KAWAII, you HAD to kill her or maim her or turn her into a ditzy bitch that Squall despised. I hated her too, you know, but I'm not willing to actually sit down and write her out of the picture in such an abrupt and unlikely way it could be considered a cop-out. For gods' sake, have pride in w
How To Write YaoiToday, we're going to show you how to write The Greatest Thing to ever happen evar.How To Write Yaoi4 years ago in Editorial More Like This
Yaoi. Since it's a known fact that all female characters are vastly inferior to the male ones, none of them are suitable to be shipped with a male character. In fact, they can all go lez in a corner. No. This is going to be about yaoi. The greatest thing to evar happen evar of all time. Because we could never let a woman soil the true and pure love between a man and another man. And nothing is more sacred than that.
1. Tops and Bottoms As a rule, all yaoi couples must have a certified top and bottom (or uke and seme for you Japan types). NO EXCEPTIONZ1111!! You're either top. Or bottom. Period. The end. No exceptions. That's how all relationships work. And if you're relationship isn't like that, then there's probably something wrong with you. Or you're a woman. Then there's definitely something w
DepressionI've heard so many people tell those who suffer depression to just 'cheer up.' I wonder if they can really believe that it's that simple.Depression8 years ago in Academic Essays More Like This
Depression isn't just sadness. It is emptiness, it is misery. It is pain and nothingness at once. When you are truly depressed you lack the ability or will to cheer yourself up. No one just 'has depression.' You suffer from it. This is depression:
You will wake at 5, 6, maybe 7am, feeling as though you had only just fallen asleep. It's likely you did. If you don't have to be somewhere, you could lie in bed for another 3 hours...too tired, too miserable and pathetic to crawl out of you bed. Or maybe you will sleep until 1pm, because it's so much easier to sleep through most of the day than actually live it, and you're so unbelievably tired anyway. You will push through the day, knowing that every hour will be a struggle and not knowing how you will feel tomorrow. People will ask what is wrong, and you will simply smile and say 'nothing, I'm just tired
you can't make them love you.He is beautiful, new, unexplored. He has wanted to kiss her ever since they met one week ago and fell prey to helpless chemistry.you can't make them love you.5 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
Dont, she says, moving her hands in a subconscious yes pattern along his arm as he rubs his cheek against hers. You dont even know my favourite colour. The wind cuts through her thin jacket, and his chest is so warm.
Red, he guesses, improbably correct. His ears are cold.
And how many dogs do I have?
Two, he says, and she laughs wildly at his luck as he nuzzles her neck.
Im trying to save you, she tells him, pushing fruitlessly against his broad shoulders. So you dont wa
How to Make a decent homestuck troll OC.THE DO'S AND DO NOT'S OF MAKING A HOMESTUCK TROLL OC.How to Make a decent homestuck troll OC.2 years ago in Editorial More Like This
1) THE NAME.
- Make it something we can pronounce. Not some stupid shit like Jukgth Ghtyfk.
- The first name HAS TO BE 6 LETTERS long.
- The last name HAS TO BE 6 LETTERS long as well.
- Your troll CANNOT have the last name of an actual canon troll.
- Nor can they be related at all.
2) TYPING QUIRKS.
- Make it something readable at least. Keep it simple.
- Don't use the ones that are over used. Like replacing S with $.
- Be creative.
3) BLOOD COLORS.
- Be realistic guys and stay with the program. Don't make them have some stupid rainbow blood or something. That screams Mary-sue.
- Your troll may be a mutant blood. It is rare but it happens. So it's okay, just don't make them flaunt it. They will be culled.
- Black and White are not colors, they are shades and tints. So therefor they cannot be blood COLORS. (This includes grey/gray)
- Lime is a canon color, but lime bloods have gone extinct.
- Your trolls blood cannot change colors.
The American Obesity ProblemThe American Obesity Problem3 years ago in Editorial More Like This
I have no face. There was a time when I may have owned one, but this is a fuzzy half-memory. In fact, it may be entirely an invention of fantasy. These days, regardless of my history, I know for a fact that I have no face. However, I have been granted a name: The American Obesity Problem. And I am growing in the United States. You may have seen me on television. You may have been witness to my disconcerting back cleavage and mystified by the seamless transition my legs make from my calves into my ankles. You probably saw my unsettlingly large, shelf-like behind as it strained against my tight Capri pants that I swore I would fit into someday and, when I didn't lose the weight, decided to wear anyway because, "If I spend more than $30 on pants I better damn well find a way to squeeze into them." You may have caught a glance of ponytail resting on my back, or a peek at several of my lower chins. But
NEW 100 Themes Challenge~THE 100 THEMES~NEW 100 Themes Challenge5 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
5. Break Up
6. New Love
9. You and Me
10. I Do
12. DO NOT ENTER
15. Kings, Queens, and Jokers
16. Run Free
17. Where are the Crackers?
19. R is for Revenge
21. Do You Want To Know?
24. Rocks Aren't the Same
27. Freedom Isn't Free
32. Dying Fire
33. Breaking Point
37. Don't Go
40. Due Date
41. Sealed in Blood
45. Be a Man
46. Go For a Swim
47. Am I Dreaming?
48. Too Good To Be True
51. Elemental Tempest
52. Too Late
53. But I DIDN'T Do It
56. Lucky 13
57. I'm In
58. Slightly Disturbed
65. Black and White
69. Broken Promise
70. All the Little
Murdering Mary SueMurdering Mary SueMurdering Mary Sue6 years ago in Academic Essays More Like This
Every aspiring writer has met her at least once, whether in his own works or in those of others. The alluring temptation of a perfect character taunts the author from one side while his muse urges him to keep writing from the other. Who wouldn't love her? She's the most beautiful, talented, fantastic woman in the universe, with not a flaw in sight. Every woman wants to be her; every man wants to marry her, so why would anyone want to kill her? Who would want to murder Mary Sue?
I would. I and many greater authors have been working hard to keep this succubus in her proper place: the trash can. Mary Sue is one of the worst enemies of good fiction, second only to poor spelling and grammar. And the seductress tempts even the most cautious writer. Her many disguises can make her difficult to spot, allowing her to weave her way into every plot twist and turn, slowly destroying the author's work. By the time shes found, she may have done so much damage that the
dArama - ISSUE ONE - Love.dArama - ISSUE ONE - Love.5 years ago in Editorial More Like This
The dynamic between core staff, volunteer staff, and the community can at times be pure quality dArama.
It's worth noting that for years I've worked pretty hard to remain neutral on community politics. Today, I'm going to shatter that concept.
Needless to say, I am extremely politically aware of the inner workings of the deviantART community. I read *a lot* of journals, comments, forums, chat rooms. I have fake accounts. I spy.
But I don't spend my time talking politics, instead I focus internally at deviantART designing technologies and implementing understandings with core staff to address the issues I see pop up.
It's time to take a moment to be a bit more petty.
In the inner workings of our politics exists the soul of deviantART. What is this place? What was it meant to do? What does it do? What could we do better? And it's the politics that give insight into how well the greater plan is running.
There's $core staff who are employees or contractors and work 8+
Funny SayingsAny law enacted with more than fifty words contains at least one loopholeFunny Sayings8 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
Evil is live spelled backwards
God must love stupid people, he made so many of them
When all else fails, read the instuctions
"Push" is the force exerted upon the door marked "Pull"
What some people lack in intelligence, they make up in stupidity
There is a difference between an open mind and a hole in the head
The light at the end of the tunnel could turn out to be the headlight of an oncoming train
A watched pot never boils, unless you light the gas under it
If your parents don't have kids, odds are you won't either
Curiosity kills more mice than cats
Save the whales. Collect the whole set
On the other hand, you have different fingers
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
How many of you believe in psycho kinesis?...Raise my hand
OK...so what's the speed of dark?
When everything is coming y
Choose to Become Gay by NorumuChoose to Become Gay by Norumu10 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
Reasons to Choose to Become Gay
1) To become rejected by society.
2) To have multiple groups against myself.
3) To raise risks of being physically harmed.
4) To raise risks of being mentally harmed.
5) To have less rights in the states.
6) To risk loosing family support.
7) To risk loosing friends.
8) To risk loosing chances at good jobs.
9) To get flamed for being a flamer.
10) To be a large target for rude jokes.
11) To be described as animals to others.
12) To be talked about as things among the law.
13) To raise my chance of being lead toward suicide.
14) To lose my chance at a rightful marriage.
15) To hide myself from everyone else.
Who wouldn't choose to be gay?!
The Original List of Themes1. IntroductionThe Original List of Themes5 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
3. Making History
12. Dead Wrong
13. Running Away
15. Seeking Solace
20. My Inspiration
21. Never Again
25. Breaking Away
26. Forever and a day
27. Lost and Found
33. Seeing Red
34. Shades of Grey
39. Out of Time
40. Knowing How
41. Fork in the road
43. Nature's Fury
44. At Peace
45. Heart Song
48. Everyday Magic
51. Troubling Thoughts
52. Stirring of the Wind
54. Health and Healing
56. Everything For You
57. Slow Down
58. Heartfelt Apology
62. Irregular Orbit
63. Cold Embrace
65. A Moment in Time
66. Dangerous Territory
Dear Yes on Prop 8 SupportersDear Yes on 8 supporters,Dear Yes on Prop 8 Supporters5 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
Hey there. Im going to go out on a limb here that most of you are feeling pretty proud of yourselves right now, patting each other on the back for your near victory of 3%. It must feel good to win huh? God knows I would be proud too if I woke up to find that my vote had such an impact on thousands upon thousands of people. I must say, Id be pretty elated over the defeat of the USs strides for separation of church and state, the victory over the very things our fore fathers fought and died for the things our country was founded on, Yes, I have to say, Id be pretty enthralled with myself for the devastation of an enormous group of people, but Im not.
Im not because I voted no to legal discrimination; no to the idea that a religiously founded belief and opinion should have any say in the legal constitution which rules over other people who may not have the same beliefs. I voted no because I felt there was a greater need f
Gay Pride**>GAY PRIDE EVERYONE!!!!!!Gay Pride8 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
**>If you want to post your stories or info for me, please do so on my continuation deviation here: Gay Pride 2 This one has reached the character limit. More information will be added to Gay Pride 2, and please read it as well as this one.
**>If homosexuality is a sin against Nature,
Then heterosexuality is a crime against Humanity.
**>Support gay marriage.
**>If homosexuality is a sin, then so is love itself. (Lonewolfess)
**>God was the one who put gays and such on the world. He loves ALL of His creations therefore He cannot hate us. Hate is sin. (little-miss-anime)
**> In birth there's a fifty percent chance any individual will come out male or female. Why should I limit the person I chose to love to the outcome of a coin flip? (OpeeFomenom)
**>If gays were allowed to marry, the government would benefit a lot more. More money for them......
**>The bible does n
A Rose by Any Other NameA Rose by Any Other Name4 years ago in Biography & Memoir More Like This
In a white hospital bed, pale as the lifeless bones of a decaying skeleton, with my flesh exposed through the backless dress of my hospital gown, I listen to nurses discuss my mental health. I can taste the quiet tap of a pen on paper and their tiny smiles of contempt.
Shame comes in waves. Its not like a scalpel or the cold touch of a surgeons hand. They never tell you that it can eat away at your insides like a virus. (That it eats you alive). Shame is not a symptom of the mentally ill. Its just a side effect.
In my creased hospital dress, I wish for death. The sweetest sleep away from detached, gloved hands and dissociative expressions. The never-ending hostile questions and the silent blame and accusations lying unspoken on dry lips.
You did this. Youre not sick. Youre just a twisted, manipulative lunatic.
Under medication and the slow Novocain drip of sedation, I wish for another disease. I want a tumor in my head something t
mary-sue testthis test was made for people who write fanfictions featuring their OC`s [original characters] wishing to avoid creating mary-sues. You can test as many characters as you want :] remember: no offensemary-sue test6 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
UPDATE `11 30 07
If your character belongs to a race that has wings, unusual eye colour, etc. And most other characters in the story have those traits, don`t add extra points.
P.S - This test is intended for human female characters. If your character is male, go look for a gary-stu test.
1. Does your character have a long, rare or unusual name? [if she lives in japan, japanese name is not unusual] +1
2. Does your character have more than one first/second name for no reason? +1
3. [count all that apply]
She`s not a human? +1
Half a human? +1
[half]An Angel? +1
[half]A Vampire? +1
[half]A Werewolf? +1
4. She belongs to a royal family? +1
5. Does she have amnesia? +1
It heals as the story goes on? +1
___ out of 10
Paneling tips for mangaPaneling tips for manga10 years ago in Academic Essays More Like This
Paneling is a part of Graphic design. O_- It's an art in itself, think of how you would do a collage and put together a puzzle, that's how paneling works.
You must understand the basic 2D design element:
movement, center of interest, value contrast, volume, size, perspective.... so on and on....
As for paneling.... there is no set way to do it, whether drawing the picture first, or draw the panel's first, or draw the panels and the pictures back and forth.... it's all upto the artist, as long as the result is satisfying to the artist. Just experiement and find the best way that suits you.
1. Panels must support your content: That's the most important thing.... if one line is going over an important character's head shot, omit that line and let the character stand out~ If one frame is more important than the other, you wish to make it a focus on the page, make that frame larger than the others, sometimes it can even overlap other panels alittle. However, being overly complicated
Getting Published the Hard WayGETTING PUBLISHED: THE TRADITIONAL WAYGetting Published the Hard Way4 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
A tutorial by M. Alice Chown
If, like me, you have stories lying around gathering virtual dust on your hard drive, why not send them out to a publisher? You have nothing to lose. A couple of years ago, I attended the launch of an annual Canadian short story anthology, called Tesseracts 10. I knew one of the authors whose speculative fiction piece had been included in the book. Matthew Johnson and I had taken the same creative writing course. Our former prof, author, Robert Sawyer, was there at the launch too, as well as the editors of the anthology. Those who had contributed a story to Tesseracts 10 took turns saying a few words about their piece. Matt talked about his joy at learning that after so many rejections his humble tale about soup of all things had made it into print. Most surprising to me, however, were the words of the pretty, brunette author. She was just 19, a University of Toronto student, and her short story had been her very first
How to Write a Hot RomanceRomance has always been a hot subject in the literary world. It's even gone so far as to permeate other genres such as horror, sci-fi, comedy, etc. But what is it that just makes it so popular? What are some special ingredients one can use to make one's special romance story work juuust right?How to Write a Hot Romance4 years ago in Editorial More Like This
1. Chicks First and foremost, all chicks like romance. No exceptions. Every girl secretly wants someone else (ex. a hot male) to cuddle them and hold them and to tell them what to do whisper sweet wordings in her ear while he runs his fingers through her hair. They also want to feel safe and that nothing will hurt them when their big strong man is around. Tapping into the mind of chicks will allow you to better see and understand exactly what it is that makes romances so utterly amazing and magical and, basically, romantic.
2. Dark and Deadly Chicks like danger. And potential psychopaths. It gives them a thrill and the fact many of them mistake an antisoc
The Slenderman Survival GuideThe Slenderman Survival Guide:The Slenderman Survival Guide3 years ago in Editorial More Like This
With the popularity of Marble Hornets, the Slenderman, originally the product of a thread on SomethingAwful, has become an internet legend, and is responsible for scaring the shit out of many a curious viewer who made the foolish decision to watch the end of entry 26 at 3:00 in the morning. Now, Slenderman is a fictional character, but if he was real he would pose a serious problem to anyone who has watched these videos. Slenderman is a lot like the first rule of Fight Club. You do not talk about Slenderman, or try to find out information about Slenderman. If you do, he will get closer and closer to you until he finally kills you. This takes months, and is a long and terrifying process. From watching the various series about Slenderman, I have put together a seven step plan that may save your life if Slenderman turns out to be real and begins to stalk you. Follow these steps, and you may just survive with your sanity intact.
I do not know if these will wo
Nude Art PetitionIt seems that DA suffers from an over-representation of female nude photography compared to other types of Nude Arts, and that male nude, especially, lacks the representation it deserves.Nude Art Petition8 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
This petition proposes :
_To enlarge the nude photography category to a NUDE ART category.
_To split this nude art category into a FEMALE NUDE ART and a MALE NUDE ART categories, which would both have their own gallery director.
This would ensure a better representation of male nude and other sorts than photographic nudes in the Daily Deviations and on DA.
Naruto Japanese DictionaryNaruto Japanese Dictionary8 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
General Language Notes
1) Insults. Mostly, these come in the form of impolite pronouns. Words like kisama and yarou arent technically dirty names, theyre just very impolite. Occasionally, as is the case with school children, these can become as creative as most American insults, ranging from impugning a persons intelligence to impugning their direct genetic makeup.
2) Plurals. The only way of expressing plural (aside from using numbers) is with a special noun ending. The suffix -tachi is the polite way of doing this; it expresses a group of things. For instance, Bob-san-tachi means Bob and whoever happens to be associated with him by context this could mean all the people sitting at the same table with Bob, all of Bobs closest friends, Bobs closest coworkers, or whatever. The suffix -ra is the impolite/informal way o
Writers 100 Theme Challenge1] BeginningsWriters 100 Theme Challenge6 years ago in General Non-Fiction More Like This
apples, dammitThe Big Secret to Learning How to Draw:apples, dammit5 years ago in Editorial More Like This
In the Beginning... You see an apple, and you draw an apple. You look at your drawing, and it's utter crap. It looks nothing like the real thing, and you wonder why. "Hey, a real apple is red and round. My drawing is red and round. Huh. What's wrong?"
You draw some more apples. Many times.
And finally, one day, you have a Eureka! moment. You realize, *d'oh!* a real apple isn't entirely round! It's wider at the top, narrower underneath. It's got funky little lumps at the bottom. It's got a dip like a crazy deep belly button at the very top. You draw another apple. The result is better, but it's still crap. Much nicer crap than before, but still.... Hmm.
You draw more apples. Repeat.
Another day of drawing, another Eureka! moment. Hello! The red isn't really red. This particular apple is slightly darker than true red. And it's got some tiny tan spots on it. And at the top, the red turns into a pale green color near the stem. You draw an apple once