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All Deviations
All Deviations


Thou shalt never be abandoned
Thou shalt never be forsaken
For I shall always return

The only words seen upon this page
Written in the stain of ink, sealed
She hath signed her name to them
A purity thou hast tasted but once
Beauty it was, from thy tongue
A sonance from thy lips

Doth they serve
As a first promise
As last words to thee
Unspoken in your leave

Alas, Thou has left in silence
Swept away in a gale

Thou art gone, Alas
©2006-2008 ~RedRedValentine
Details
Submitted: January 26, 2006
File Size: 646 bytes
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Comments: 7
Favourites & Collections: 1 [who?]

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Author's Comments

Forced myself to write something, really quite simple. I like the sound it has to it, though I think the second line maybe too much in the first stanza.
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Devious Comments

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~NaughtyFreak:iconNaughtyFreak: Jan 27, 2006, 12:09:11 AM
Wow.. excellent piece. Very inspiring.
~SecretShowMonster:iconSecretShowMonster: Jan 27, 2006, 3:12:40 AM
Yes, i like the last line in the second stanza, i reckon it sounds awesome when read outloud.

--
Hearts filthy lesson...
~aeonsonance:iconaeonsonance: Jan 27, 2006, 1:53:04 PM
Ahh ...a gentle sigh.
'Tis simple and beautiful. :)

--
My Music
~PassionRulesUsAll:iconPassionRulesUsAll: Mar 26, 2006, 2:25:40 PM
Amazing...It actually gave me goosebumps...
~PassionRulesUsAll:iconPassionRulesUsAll: Mar 30, 2006, 3:14:57 PM
I ADORE the tone of this piece. The love and hope portrayed in the first three lines contrasts so beautifully with the loss and sadness in the last three. wow
~Ivyesse:iconIvyesse: Dec 17, 2006, 5:47:40 AM
The second line in the first stanza fits exactly where it should be.Good work,and I like the way it sounds too.