i wanti don’t know what to write here. that i miss you? that it’s not okay and i want your arms around me? i want the smell of you and your hands on my ears, tangled up in my hair. i want you sleeping and peaceful, fingers like butterfly wings on my spine.i want3 days ago in Emotional More Like This
i want your car, you and me and highways. i want the night pressed against us and the air thick with sufjan stevens and your voice.
i want your grandmother’s house and bumping hips in that tiny kitchen, your queen size bed and cool sheets, sprawling on the carpet in bare legs and baggy t-shirts, rug burn on the backs of my knees.
i want kissing in your parent’s half-finished basement, your mother asking my opinion of her hair and you shuffling awkwardly in the hallway. i want curling up with you on a tiny couch, half-listening to movies with dust on my feet.
i forgot how you smelled and it’s killing me.
The cruelties of our worldYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!The cruelties of our world1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
Question to discuss:
Why do people have to pretend to love you
You: Because we're lonely too
You: we're lonely and we're hurt
Stranger: because they want you to pretend that you love them too
You: and we cant' open up
You: we actually do care alot more than you ever realise, it's just ...we can't show it
You: so we appear heartless
Stranger: and we hope that if we pretend then someday it will be real
You: maybe if we keep searching, eventually we will find somebody who will just feel right
You: and we hurt so much inside, that we can't afford to be alone for any longer
Stranger: because we hate the thought we have when we're alone
Stranger: we cant handle the chaos in ourselves
You: can't eat. can't sleep. Can barely function
Stranger: so we hope that we can mask it by caring about others
You: and we keep having to pretend we're fine
You: caring for others helps fill the yawning chasm inside of us
You: maybe if we work ha
TrustYour hands are upon my back in a friendly embrace...Trust1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
And yet I do not flinch.
You are so near I could hear your heartbeat...
And yet I am not afraid.
You return my playful jabs with earnest fun...
And yet I do not feel wary.
You are so very near when my guard crumbles in my place of safety...
And yet I feel at peace.
What is this feeling? I know I have felt it before. In the safety of my home, in the soft whispers of the trees pine. When I glance into the stars, blinking contently in the warmth of their own existence, making me feel so small yet somehow as content as they. I have felt it in the lulls of sleep and the quietness of a solitary afternoon.
Peace, contentment, safety, happiness. All of these have stemmed from one. Trust.
I ask myself when this happened. When I have allowed you into my world so deeply, whilst others barely catch my name? I ask myself another question, and then another, and then another. They all lead to th
No tengo ganasPor esto no tengo novio:No tengo ganas3 days ago in Emotional More Like This
No tengo ganas de pensar en alguien todo el día.
No tengo ganas de enojarme con alguien porque no me contesta los mensajes.
No tengo ganas de encelarme.
No tengo ganas de privarme de cosas por alguien.
No tengo ganas de dejar amistades.
No tengo ganas de tener tiempo para una persona.
No tengo ganas de ser cursi.
No tengo ganas de dar explicaciones.
No tengo ganas de llorar por una pelea.
No tengo las más mínimas ganas de enamorarme
10 Questions1. Why do you draw, paint, take photographs, model, create your art, etc?10 Questions1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
Why? I couldn’t not basically. I love all art, but the still frame has my heart, the challenge of capturing a moment in a single frame has been one that I have been mastering for some 20 years now. It occupies my mind 24/7, it is the hardest thing I have ever taken on but the most rewarding also. Why, because I am addicted to amazing images and making people look superhuman.
2. Where do you call home now? How many places have you lived? Which has been your favorite?
I live in Ballarat Australia, it is a small town, about an hour from out start capital, Melbourne. I was born here, but spent most of my life moving around different towns, I have lived in around 6 towns and in 20 different houses but have always considered here, home.
3. Have you ever used certain drugs in an attempt to "enhance" your artistic vision?
I like the idea of that, I have tried Absinth once, all t
I Don't Want To Fall Out of LoveWhere do I even start?I Don't Want To Fall Out of Love2 days ago in Emotional More Like This
I’m sad. I’ve been sad ever since I realized that when I look at you now, I don’t feel excited, happy, joyful, relieved or anything special. My heart doesn’t pump faster. It doesn’t stop. My breath never gets caught anymore, even when you look good or, more accurately, IF you look good. I don’t notice anything special anymore so I don’t notice that black shirt that drove me crazy before. I don’t notice the way your shaggy hair falls around the frame of your face, or the color. I don’t notice at all. I don’t care if I hang out with you anymore even though I want to care. I force myself to try to feel A LITTLE excited, like before, but replicating the emotions isn’t the real thing.
And that’s all I want. I want it so much, I miss it, and I miss it so much, I feel like crying. That’s how sad and empty I feel without those romantic feelings I had for you. They made everything b
More .More .2 days ago in Emotional More Like This
4/ My life= Split into pieces
4/ My heart= Shattered Heart
2 X Pain (squared)= Poison X Lethality X 10= Suffering
4! X Hurtful Words= Screaming Pain
4! X Physical Abuse X Verbal Totrture X Screaming + Suicidal Thinking= Depression
Which equals= Suicide.
Past% + Depressing Present= Bleak Future
Stupid Shit (squared) X Mc(squared)= A matter of energetic Destruction!
Lies + Self-Indulgence X 10 + Critizicism= Brain-damage!
Stupid Society+ Painful History X Repeated Cycle= Inhabitable Atmosphere.
All of this in total= A Recipe for Suicide, GOSH DAMN IT!
No se sabe que sentirA veces creen que no tienes derecho a estar triste.No se sabe que sentir13 hours ago in Emotional More Like This
Mientras cientos de personas como tú están en una mala situación, mientras del otro lado del mundo los mismos ojos tristes miran cómo todo su esfuerzo se vuelve nada, sin poder hacer algo al respecto. La misma piel lastimada se eriza al sentir de nuevo la amenaza, no le queda más que correr. Tú que te jactas de todo aquello que no valoras ¿Por qué estás triste?
Te lo repiten una y otra vez, se graba y se guarda en un cajón.
Estos ojos que ven sólo monotonía
Esta piel que quedó marcada por el pasado.
Y de nuevo la sensación de sentirse incompleto, pequeño y solo.
Las risas amigas se apagan como bombillas sobrecargadas, explotan y se desvanecen en un apagado suspiro.
No se está triste, porque no se merece. Lo malo de todo eso... Es que al final no se sabe qué sentir.
Do You See What I See...?Do you see what I see? Do you suffer like I suffer? You who makes your faceless comments hiding behind your computer screen? The pain you cause because you believe that your cause alone is justified when you spill out heated words of horrific proportions? Do you see the world like I do? Have you spent the day walking in my shoes? Have you felt the ache of losing those dearest to you, or the arguments with you birth mother because she couldn't keep her legs together and honour herself as a person and you are the result? Or to know that your father walked out on your mother because you were growing within her and had yet to do anything that was wrong? Is it a fault then, that your birthmother claims to love you and yet neglects you at every turn, until at last the day she wishes to face it, is the day you have already given up on her unchanging ways and want nothing more to do wiDo You See What I See...?2 days ago in Emotional More Like This
Music Or SilenceDo you prefer serious scenes with good-fitting music or silence?Music Or Silence2 days ago in Emotional More Like This
Gender and Sexuality QuestionsSo, I really don't want this to be the focus of this account, but it is part of the reason I have it. And, before I start really trying to make friends here, I just kinda wanna have something said, and ask a question or two...Gender and Sexuality Questions2 days ago in Emotional More Like This
At this point in my life, I'm trying to explore myself a little. I kinda would like to keep my real gender a secret. But I'm afraid that if it's ever found out I am really a boy/girl, that people might get upset thinking that I was posing or just wanted to get my rocks off. This account is about more than that. Part of it is dedicated to my fetish, yes. But I'm really trying to find myself. I've been going through "waves" of different feelings the past couple years. And I'm just trying to find out what I am. I come from a very conservative family. And I myself, am still religious and hold certain beliefs very dear to me. But the environment I live in doesn't really let me explore without lots of uncomfortable questions and harassment. So when I act like/present m
Just StopYou know, we humans are really weird. Many of us whine about how depressing and gloomy things are on a rainy day, but then the next day many whine about sun being too bright. Or groan about the dark but once the lights are on it's too bright. Emotions, much like weather, can change in the blink of an eye, suddenly your good day turns bad. Have you noticed how we blame small and useless things for our bad moods. "Waking up on the wrong side of the bed"or "it's not my day". For us, for me, things move too fast. One second it's your first day in kindergarten, the next your graduating high school.Just Stop3 days ago in Emotional More Like This
Isn't it insane how things tumble out of control from the smallest set-off? It's like one wrong step can destroy everything you know. And when they do don't say "I'm just one person" or "I'm only human" because there is so much you can change in this race we call everyday life. Yes you are just one person, but what about a drop of water? It's just one drop of water yet every sing
The Demise of an Academically Successful StudentApparently, I used to get almost full marks in school. Every single exam and writing assignment, the highest mark in class, be it in English, Physics or Math. But now, I don't know what happened, my teachers just bleakly told me, "We expected way better from you", as I was handed back my corrected first draft of the moderation essays. Of course, being the sensitive person that I am, I was thrown into a state of great shock and trauma due to that. I do not know what to say. It's almost as if I don't know if I have the power to write anymore.The Demise of an Academically Successful Student3 days ago in Emotional More Like This
I cannot pick up a pen and write again. I cannot express my ideas in the creative, flowing way I always do....I cannot even write down a proper analysis sentence. Honestly, I can't even understand a basic poem again. I've been thrown into a never-ending world of language medleys and I became a huge mess of unfinished letters.
Looking back at my previous essays, I cannot help but wonder how I used to accomplish great feats, and now I can barely do a
Black Rose"Can you come over, Evan?" the text asked.Black Rose1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
"Yeah, I can." was the response.
Evan had had a long-standing crush on Marie.
Everyone at school knew, even Marie.
But nothing was ever made of it.
Evan had known her since forever ago, but never admitted
that he had come to love every aspect of her.
Her luscious hair, her smile, her laugh.
He had never had a girlfriend and he was really crazy about her.
He knew she had big plans, so she wouldn't stay in this town
if she could, especially since her parents were business people.
She had some of the greatest grades and was pushed hard by her parents.
She really wasn't as filled with joy as she wanted others to believe.
Kids When kids are little you think they won't understand the arguing and fighting but really we do we just don't have the guts to say it.Sometimes it hurts and sometimes it makes us confused about everything.When i was little that fighting made me think that what is going to happen to me will i go with mom or dad but 80% of the time your parents divorce but i knew it was going to happen whether they were happy one moment.Kids learned and picked up thing by their parents like you don't have to be in a relationship to understand the rights from the wrong.Sometimes you have to give a high five to the kids because they have to go through the parents crap too.Kids 8 hours ago in Emotional More Like This
Trans HateI'd rather have all of my ribs broken than be perceived as female.Trans Hate12 hours ago in Emotional More Like This
The pain of my chest ripping open is nothing compared to being told I'll never be who I am.
Getting real tired of your shit, Vienna.Some fucking words to use on this shit Idfk what even "Thesis Statement Language" FUCKGetting real tired of your shit, Vienna.18 hours ago in Emotional More Like This
Make a fucking SPECIFIC THESIS, VIENNA. NONE OF THAT BULLSHIT, OKAY?!
Fuck > : (
DON'T FORGET TO DEVELOP A THESIS, IDIOT. Slide explaining how to develop a thesis, because you are obviously to stupid to know when you;re already in THE TWELVE FUCKING GRADE.
Remember what you read. It's slide 14 though, for you to go back and read when you forget, fucking idiot.
Do some research, idiot. You're doing topic 2, something about bitches in the medieval time, which is like the 15th century? Idfk, but you should ask Emily, she's doing the same topic. Just fucking copy her while you're at it, cause you're to stupid to actually pick your own.
Oh fuck, "Now that you have a Thesis," like I just read this, I didn't come up with one, plz. What's a thesis? I don't even know what I'm doing, I just said "bitches in the medieval time, which is the 15th century?" like that's not go
Lonely MoonThis is my first attempt at a short story, that only involves a monologue. So bare with it.Lonely Moon20 hours ago in Emotional More Like This
A young man sits on a bench under a roof in the middle of the lake. With a completely clear mind he begins to speak to the night sky.
"Under the bright moonlight glow, all I can think about is one thing. The only thing that can truly overwhelm me, and distract me from my love of an immaculate moonrise. Sitting here alone makes me think of my very situation."
He gazes upward at the glowing orb.
"I look at the moon for inspiration and all I get out of it are 'I wonder if I'm the only person in the world that feels this way.' and 'Who else can be inspired by a spectacular sight that has lost more and more of its envy as time passes by.'"
"Envy." he whispers to himself. "That's a word that truly represents how I feel about the moon. Its only purpose is to bring light to night and outshine every other entity in the dark sky."
He stands, walks over to the railing of the platform, and looks down at the
BooksBecause it's not about the happy ending. It's not about solving the mystery or catching the bad guy. It's about losing yourself in the pages of another world. It's about the words that make you laugh into the quiet room. It's about forgetting where you are because for a moment you are lost in ink and paper. It's about coming away from a book with ideas and emotions and energies that you didn't know you could have, and then doing it all again.Books1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
Books are stories and knowledge and connections. Books give us the magic we can't have. They bring us to people that are gone. They stretch our minds in ways we can not fathom before it is done, and the good books... the books that break off a little piece of themselves and nestle down into us... they become part of who we are. They influence us to shape our lives and the lives of those we encounter, and they will always, always be there, even when we've forgotten them.
An Attempt I think one of the most horrific things you can see is your child bleeding to death.An Attempt1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
I was 12. Not a year where good decisions are made to say the least. But I was most certainly on a different boat than most kids my age. A diagnosis with depression is one of the main things that separated me from the larger crowd of mostly healthy children. Puberty, stupidity, desperation, and depression were not a good combination. Every waking moment was miserable. There were times where I enjoyed myself, but there was always this dark cloud hanging over me. I never felt myself. I was often made fun of at school for my nasally, slightly masculine voice and the non-girly way I behaved. My parents were not happy and often fought, my brother and sister had medical issues, and I couldn't find an escape from anything. I thought I found a way one night. A blade to my wrists every night. I can't really explain why. It's something I did that felt like an escape. It wasn't. Things only g
Be my...A girl sat alone on a field drawing the place before her. She wears headphone over her ears, ignoring everything except what she drawing. Then a young male around her age comes infront of her. He greets her with so much energy, but the girl takes her things and walk away leaving the boy who was still smiling.Be my...1 day ago in Emotional More Like This
The next day the girl came back to the field with the head phones still on, and the boy comes again greeting her. The girl decided if she ignores him, he might leave her alone. The boy sits next to her and keeps talking to her with a smile, even though he knew she couldnt hear him. But the boy hoped if he kept talking, the girl would get curiose.
The days pass with the boy talking with a smile, and the girl having her head phone on not lisening. But somethings have changed over the days, the girl started to sometimes look at the boy smiling.
Then one day the boy never showed, and for some reason the girl couldnt draw. The girl would sometimes look around, hoping to see him. This c