The birthday poem of fabulousnessWho's the bro of bros?The birthday poem of fabulousness1 day ago in Free Verse More Like This
Says bros before hoes?
Makes us laugh 'til we die
Who's the number one?
(my anaconda don't)
That son of a gun
(my anaconda don't)
Always a barrel of fun
(my anaconda don't want none)
Can't be outdone
(unless you got buns hun)
Octodad is a Dadliest Catch
Pewds and Marzia are a perfect match
When Octodad goes on a date
It's a total disaster, mate
Unstoppable just like Delsin Rowe
That's our Poods, the number one bro
Don't deny he's an ace
Unless you'd like a brofist in the face
P to the E to the W to the D to the S
It's Pewds, the master of ducks
Red bird secret, everyone knows that place, right?
That's what I thought, so don't pick a fight
Happy birthday to you now, Pewds
and thanks for always making me smile
Was my day bad or good,
you're always worth my while
You're always there for us
and we'll be there for you
That, if something, is true
Easily scared and yet so amusing,
we love you, Pewds, don't change a thing
InsomniaGrey dawn through the window slitheringInsomnia1 week ago in Free Verse More Like This
Brain recycling, maundering, blithering
Craving oblivion, stubbornly dithering
Clock-face blurs... hope now withering.
O what a conversation!I started:O what a conversation!2 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
"Ogres ogling octopi ought to be ostracized!"
"On the other hand, ogres ogling octopi offer optimal optical opportunities for ogres."
"Of course, ogres ogling octopi ordinarily offends observers overseas."
"Oh, come on!"
"On my honor. Ogres ogling octopi in Okinawa offends Okinawans by obviating ocular objectives
that would ordinarily offer opportunities for objective observation, thereby obliterating ongoing efforts
to observe octopi in an otherwise optimal oceanic opera."
"Therefore, ogres ogling octopi in Okinawa only serves to offend octopi-obsessed Okinawans."
"Ouch indeed. Okinawan officials thus object to ogres ogling octopi, particularly in the month of October."
"Okinawan shores are officially off-limits to ogres in October, whether they be ogling octopi, orbiting phenomena, or other objects of interest to ogres or their ogre offspring."
"Sucks to be an ogre in Okinawa in October, eh?
Care PackageTo wish you happy birthday, friendCare Package3 days ago in Free Verse More Like This
I stuffed an envelope to send
With in-jokes, hugs, a kiss or two,
The things that I adore in you.
The songs we share and sing aloud,
The compliments that made me proud,
The times you’ve made me laugh and cry,
The way the hours with you sail by,
The conversations late at night,
The wonders that we jointly write
In escalating inspiration
And joy in our collaboration…
Adventures that we daydream of,
Understanding, trust, and love.
Alas, but I was doomed to fail —
It simply got too large to mail!
Sweet RevengeSLURP!!Sweet Revenge1 week ago in Free Verse More Like This
Layla grimaced when she heard the sound of the large dog lapping up water from its water bowl in the kitchen. She still wasn’t sure why in the whole world Rage would have stolen the ugly mutt at all, let alone brings it to the base they were forced to be living in now. They already had 2 of them if she counted Zolo as a pet along with Chain, the Tentacle beast. Not only was Ruby Red, as Rage called her, big, she had a nasty habit of drooling great big globs of spittle.
Shivering at the thought of that, Layla focused back on her work out. Though the base hasn’t been used for some time, it still had most of the furniture, as well as, workout equipment that was still useable. She was using a box to do leg lifts, when the door to the gym opened up and Rage walked in and looked over at her.
“Hey Layla, how’s the workout going?” He said as her pulled up a chair beside her. Layla made a face as he did, but ignored him and continued to use the box and lift
How To Write A Poem.How To Write A Poem.How To Write A Poem.2 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
*Note, this is not suppose to be taken seriously, this is simply for comedic effect.*
Does a poem need to rhyme?
Well if you want allot of free time.
To have that time, you can do some crime,
but not anything too extreme,
because you still need to listen to Clapton and The Cream.
Do what Carlin did and talk the talk.
You won't get locked up for very long,
because you know right from wrong.
You might pay a fine,
which is fine because you just want to drink wine.
If you don't wanna do any time,
then date a girl named Hime,
because you will be part of a loyal family.
You can write the poem on a balcony,
then you can look up and observe the galaxy.
Make sure a poem has a rhythm,
because that's the mission for this system.
You're like a musician,
you try to find the right words in this sheet of this digital paper.
All the cool kids will call you a cool rapper.
Paint a picture in the reader's mind,
like a blind kind cat trying to find a masked man named Mankind.
Or a lov
Not-So-Sweet ToothShe climbed into bed last night and said;Not-So-Sweet Tooth3 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
"these cavities won't go away."
And I thought she meant her teeth,
it was her mouth, but not her pearly whites
it was what lies beneath.
She closed her eyes and spoke with a sigh,
"They crawl through my molars and come out my tongue."
Perish the thought she might rot,
from the guilt and the lies
but from how things are going; she better not.
She took a pill and was still,
"The Dentist said he doesn't want to see me back."
No I don't, she's stabbed me multiple times
it'd take a root canal of her soul to fix her,
not a box full of rhymes.
She took my hand in a silent demand,
"If they all fall out, will you love me with dentures?"
I felt myself involuntarily twitch,
'cause no metaphors of teeth or regrets
would stop her from being a total bitch.
Old Mule and the MermaidOnce upon a time, there lived an old MuleOld Mule and the Mermaid3 days ago in Free Verse More Like This
down by the dA sea in a bamboo shack
on the beach under the coconut trees.
He and his old Cats were enjoying
their golden years wild and free
as their old bones would let them.
Eating and sleeping away their days
in sweet lethargy.
Come sunset old Mule would go out on his dock
and fish for comments and rhymes for his Cats.
Watching the changeable moon and circling stars
he would listen to the wind and the waves.
Some nights were all too quiet with no bites at all,
the shy nibblers stealthily stealing his bait,
he would just sit and dream.
Other nights the comments were jumping
right on to the dock. There would be buckets
full of rhymes for his old Cats!
And on special nights by the light of the moon
mermaids would swim by and sing him songs
about treasures in the depths of the dA sea.
Flirtatious creatures they were,
trying to lure him in and steal away his catch.
But old Mule was wiser than that,
his ancestor once knew the Queen of Faeries!
Too many shoesShoesToo many shoes2 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
I have too many shoes,
or at least I think I do
Honey, do you think so too?
I know now that you love me
I can resist their lure
your love at last
has made me pure
But honey, what about
that last pair of heels so high
that way it is so much
easier kissing you...
A Guide to Falling Downstairs1.A Guide to Falling Downstairs1 day ago in Free Verse More Like This
Wear fuzzy socks.
Traction is out of style,
but comfort is in,
so slip with cozy feet.
Try to choose a step
about halfway down
to ensure your fall is legitimate.
for maximum impact
and to avoid killing yourself.
This allows for choice
swear utterance at maximum volume,
as your body will not
be in the way,
If the wind is knocked out of you,
garbled choking noises
will suffice in a pinch.
Hit each stair on the way down.
It makes a pleasant percussive rhythm
that will be the only enjoyable part
of your journey.
This also ensures that
you will have a body-length bruise
to complain about.
Once at the bottom,
remain motionless for a while.
This give you time to reflect
on your relationship with gravity
and ask yourself
"What the hell just happened?
Did I break anything?"
Look for sympathy from bystanders,
realize closest bystanders are dogs
and they are more interested in dinner
that your mother is serving.
Accept help up.
Contemplate possibly broken
DreamerA myriad of opulence may be redeemedDreamer1 week ago in Free Verse More Like This
behind the enraptured gaze of one that dreams..
How dare youHow dare you.How dare you1 week ago in Free Verse More Like This
And just who do you think you are?
Going around betraying all your friends?
And for what exactly?
Some ex girlfriend
Who you have talked about everyday to everyone?
Is this how you are honoring our memory?
By dating her?
Need I remind you that she cheated on you?
She was the one you broke up with before dating me?
So why now?
What could she possibly have done to make you get back together?
You know what
Do not come crying to me if she hurts you again
I give you my kindness
And this is how you repay by it?
How dare you
The New President.The New President.The New President.3 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
He did it,
he somehow won the presidency.
Those speeches were all lies,
I know a bad actor when I see one.
How did he do it?
How did the idiot convince so many people about his ideas?
It must be his movies.
Yeah, I think I'm right about that.
Why do some many people like him?
Hes not a politician.
Well, now he is, he is the president.
I guess I better live with it.
I wrote those lines about 3 months ago,
I hoped that he would change, but he hasn't.
He is still an idiot,
still a clown,
still a person who you can't take seriously.
I wonder to myself how the next 4 years will go,
I hope it's not 8 years.
Oh silly me, I forgot to tell you who the new president is.
It's Nicolas Kim Coppola (Nick Cage).
I don't belong part 2Where do I belong part 2I don't belong part 21 month ago in Free Verse More Like This
Many people see me but don't actually know I'm there
Just a piece of memory fading away
Being blown away by the air
As if they are not trying to hear what I am trying to convey
I move along this road
My memories echoed
It sounded like a small moan
I am left behind
Not just by my family but also friend
Why must they be unkind?
Will this ever end?
I already know
That I don't belong
Drunk Poem No. 1 Stupid Little GrasshopperStupid little grasshopperDrunk Poem No. 1 Stupid Little Grasshopper5 days ago in Free Verse More Like This
Jumpin’ through the grass
You better get out the way
Or Imma step on yo ass
Stupid little grasshopper
You think you so fly
But I’d be damned if I let you jump that high
Stupid little grasshopper
You ain’t cool
You better slow down you jumpin’ fool
Epic Video Game Rap Battle - Lee Everett vs. BigbyEPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!!!!!Epic Video Game Rap Battle - Lee Everett vs. Bigby2 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
Lee Everett vs. Bigby Wolf!!!
I’m an OG history teacher with a regrettable past
But I can rip through a horde with one arm
And survive a car crash
I’d keep your Trip Trap shut if I were you
Or I’ll have my friend Kenny drop a heavy block on you
You’re a bossy little dog barking up the wrong tree
You’ll have a silver cap in your head when you mess with Lee
You can escape a flood, be a stud, and do other crud
But I won’t lose to a man who slips in a puddle of blood
You’re a criminal, an imbecile, way too over-quizzical
I’m an original, Sheriff Bigby, you can’t beat me I’m invincible
I’ll rip your other arm off like I did Grendel!
You may walk through a swarm unharmed
And save a little girl while unarmed
But with people like you I’ll send your ass down to the Farm
I escaped a farm once
While my friends all became lunch
Debata (piosenkowiersz)Ślimaki myją zęby kartoflemDebata (piosenkowiersz)2 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
Nie mają rąk
Wróciły z lasu i znalazły krawat
Pudełko nie podziela ich zdania
Bazgroł na kartce krzyczy
"Gdzie są moje trójkąty?!"
Chińczycy je zjedli.
Sparkles, Snickers, SnakesHis small snake heart was skipping beats,Sparkles, Snickers, Snakes3 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
Dreaming of those ssssssnicker bars,
And then there’s the 90’s Nokia that clearly doesn’t work,
But if it did I’d be all over Snake,
We know who’s here now don’t we, folks?
Donald Duck over there,
Please send some help one way or another,
Because my eyeballs hate me,
I think that I’m about to die.
All day, erry day,
About this I will make no jokes,
What can I say?
I’m one nostalgic little peach.
The Strongest Man in IkebukuroThe Strongest Man in Ikebukuro1 month ago in Free Verse More Like This
"The Strongest Man In Ikebukuro" Poem
Yeah, I know him.
He's pretty strong, I guess,
But I don't think vending machines weigh that much...
And lamp posts are always flying through the air.
You heard he has anger issues?
Nah, he just needs a hug.
Kinda like a grizzly bear or a wolverine.
No big deal.
He's a pretty nice guy overall.
The Sock SongOne or two, old and new.The Sock Song1 week ago in Free Verse More Like This
These socks don't have any clue.
They keep me warm day and night,
and hang to dry in morning light.
Wind and rain come out and play.
Dear old socks got swept away.
It was my washer; drank them down.
Those are my socks, I pout and frown.
Sailing high on wind and wing,
[un]lucky socks, my words will spring
to the clouds, here I howl:
Missing socks, come home right now!
But my socks, they don't listen.
Wet and cold with rain-drops glisten.
From the sky to the gutter,
coloured wool falls with a flutter.
Blown away in a rushing wave,
my poor lost socks none will save.
Now to find a new cozy pair,
please don't flee; I've none to spare.
The Man Who Lived Under A RockI am the man who lives under a rock.The Man Who Lived Under A Rock2 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
Under the rock I stand.
I know nothing of nothing
And my name's written in sand.
And here's my lament:
I know nothing of my country
Nor of how it began,
I know nothing of it's history,
Or the Natives here before,
except that many go missing alot...
I know nothing of our symbols...
The Coat of Arms?
The national bird?
The Summer sport? Winter?
Why do we have two?
We invented Basketball?
I didn't know that...
Then why does our team suck so much?
Who even plays on that team?
How do you even play?
Politics? I don't have a clue.
What in the world is a Green Party?
NDP? What does that even stand for?
How did Harper get more than two terms?
Wait? Prime Ministers get more?
Why is a British Queen on my twenty?
We're not British! We're not even a monarchy...
Who are the people on our fives and tens?
How long were they in office? When?
WE'RE they in office?
What are our economics like?
What even is that? ow does it work?
Are we Capitalist or Socialist?
Bitlets 205When you are about to be dessertedBitlets 2052 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
on a Friday night out, go light on the cake
and heavy on the pie and treat yourself.
HeyShe called my name...Hey3 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
And it was wonderful.
She called my name
Like the howling wind
She called my name
Like a haunting conscious
She called my name like Navi.
She called my name!
Mouth Like A RockstarI shall have a mouth like an older rockstarMouth Like A Rockstar3 weeks ago in Free Verse More Like This
When I am only 30,
for I am shouting more than they sing.
These children are making me scream
as if I am a black metal singer,
on a stage that is this house.
I wish that I could do
A death metal growl,
for it would be more threatening than a high pitched noise.
All I need is a hairdo
like the girl from the ring,
or maybe a crazy perm.
I shall have a mouth
that will rival Ozzy Osbourne's,
because of my black metal screams.