FallingI've lived through pain and broken heartsFalling50 minutes ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I've become torn apart
I've heard people call me weird and freak
they think I'm too weak
too lonely, too sad
that my very suffering makes them glad
everyday I lie to myself saying "It's okay"
that today will be a better day
but I end up sad and alone
I'm even lost in my home
I give up, I'll never be free!
Somebody please catch me...
DavidI once fell in lust with an unobtainable poet.David2 hours ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
It wasn't just his seemingly laid back yet clearly effort driven style which caused me palpitations; throwing my heart into a tachycardic mess.
And it wasn't just that alluring, off to the side, awkward smile; the inviting, yet shylike quality of it all melted my heart, spilling it all over my insides.
No, it wasn't just his "close to home", "I'm my own me so take it...please" personality which bursted out in rays of warm sun-kissed flickers;
But it was the pheromonic openness and outflow of his words which had found their own way of wrapping around my senses and enrapturing me in all that he was.
All that he is.
But while the letters spelled out "Y-E-S", his own heart was held behind a glass screen (or was it some kind of plastic?) which read "UNOBTAINABLE".
I could do nothing then but marvel at the Michelangeloesque masterpiece which remained behind that darned glass screen. (Or was it some kind of plastic?)
StringsThat’s not how friendship works.Strings11 hours ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
that's not how any of this works.
He doesn’t see anything.
How we’re living next to each to each other, instead of together.
This won’t work, old lad. It won’t.
I’m not for free. At least I will
Take your love. All of it. Territorial desires.
We’re still predators, you know.
Now say amen
And shut up until I’m somebody else.
Until you sucked all the war from my tongue.
You’re not angel enough to be a good death.
I can’t possibly love you this way.
You’ll remain missing overtures
And a door that is locked.
Something that is not quite me
Antique LoveAre my feelings antiquated to you?Antique Love12 hours ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Just a relic from the wreckage
Of your feckless past?
Then my guilt is dated.
You hold no more sway.
I tie stones to you, witch,
And watch you sink beneath me.
There is brick dust on my door step,
And black salt in my pocket.
At night when you try and sink
You’re rearing teeth into my bowed soul,
I nail my hands to my heart
Like a notice of eviction,
And command you to leave this vessel!
It leaks no more under your downpour,
The volcanoes inside me have not quieted,
You will never douse out my rites of life,
I celebrate my liberation from my home.
I hope one day you’ll make yourself
Grow bored, finally all tuckered out,
And maybe sit down and let yourself
Feel something other than anger.
UntitledMalevolent. Treating me like my feelings irrelevant. Walk into the room and they're right there like the elephant. The look in your eyes that reveals the truth, shot into my head like John Wilks Booth.Untitled19 hours ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
The silence, the virtue.
The pain that won't hurt you.
Every little thing, of each and every day.
Confidence, belief. Assurance, conviction. All this back and forth like a crippling addiction.
I was blind, helpless.
Words I don't understand.
Through the shining light, all I saw was your guiding hand.
I was dumb, clueless. Void of reprimand. I truly believed I was able to do this.
UntitledThis abysmal rain,Untitled20 hours ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
it matches the sound of my pain,
I try to run,
but I can't escape form it hun.
Now I'll let my blood run down the drain.
The Merry TownRun run little oneThe Merry Town22 hours ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Run run till the time has come
Along the strange but merry trail
That Seekers will come to find shells
But until the sun dies down
You will always find adventure in the merry town
Across the horizon and past the sea
The merry town is as happy as it's believed
With people dancing far and wide
All the way to see the circus on the dancing tides
All day and all night
These people come to cast their fright
To go and find another life
With their cares all cast away
They play and play until daylight's rays
And there is where the fun will stop
Because they are limited on how they sought
To become as real as the day
But until then they have to stay
Fading into the sunlight's rays
GiftArtGift1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
The making of art does not require much
And yet it requires
A hand to hold onto, wrinkled, pudgy or lithe
A whisper to capture like a firefly and stow away in yesterday’s pants pocket
Two tubes of pigment and a bottle
Ink for the blackest of blacks
Against the drips of mascara tumbling down the bags of my eyes
Three pencils to grasp onto,
One: to teach patience
Two: to teach concentration
Three: to teach courage
And the grays in between to teach compromise
Two chipped coffee mugs,
Weathered and beaten with brushstrokes and lipstick stains from the nights
I remember eating alone; you loved the sea
“Happy Birthday. I’m sorry this is all I could get for you.”
“You drew this?”
Two toned- paper and I spiral through a tunnel, one stroke up, down, left, right,
A rustle under the blankets and I see your eyes
Waking up to the moonlight
“Tell me a story, mommy”
Jade swirls into lavender, the princess breaks free
Today Was Yesterday, But With a TwistPut on the white cloakToday Was Yesterday, But With a Twist1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
When you Journey into town.
Cover every nuance
Baked in god and stoned in the spirit.
Shout out your name so all shall hear it.
Never ease the ache through the days your aren't committed
And in their hand, upon every face all will have spitted.
But you finally got there just to hate the holder
And you never exchange again, only look around the shoulder.
Soil and seed keeps bonds of hell together
And when failing, never scare is medication for this endeavor:
Liquid and Smokey,
Foreign covered places.
And in other worlds
You find revealing stasis.
Have fun in the temple
And stay away from me.
I have no reason to care
About your grand atrocity.
I hope your mind withers away and dies
Like all of your hopes and dreams.
You never fought adversity
You only plucked at it's seams.
Pandora MotherFrom the watch towerPandora Mother1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Of my pride,
The minor chord
Of my self-esteem
Carries on the wind,
Like an overblown ego.
The routine of the critic
Doubled over with disgust
For my whole fucking world.
None of you matter,
And neither do I.
Even my idols
They age and they die.
Meaningless when why
Is just an empty word
The slang of my suicide:
Lonely complex of voyeur convex
My mind is a New Orleans dome
With homeless thoughts.
Your memory is a shit stain
In my guest room.
Some filthy joke I hideaway
To entertain the unsavory
And keep our love at arm’s length.
Your heart is dybbuk box
Of unclean thoughts,
Pandora who eavesdrops
At my confessional box.
I want you to know
I get off when you struggle;
A gremlin pissing on your future
Far from subtle.
Ironic ghost of the grid
Who is without guilt? Those without sin
No freedom without frisson
No church in the wild
So fuck your redemption.
Blinders on that suffrage
Don’t hear no recompense
In that utterance.
The Wanderer: When I Was YoungThe Wanderer: When I Was YoungThe Wanderer: When I Was Young1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
When I was young
I knew I wanted
To wander around the world
To climb up mountains
To wander without stop
To run away from this world
I knew I was to enter the a whole new world
I knew I was going wanderer secret paths of the world
To find where the saddest people are
To be a wanderer
I knew that when I young
And my name is Alice
Kimi ni todokeAs I was talking to the clouds I realizedKimi ni todoke1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
We're under the same sky, but even so
It doesn't feel right yet to call this "closeness"
Within the vast feebleness of the horizon
Between my endless inquiring projections
Raises the moon, as ever tireless, silver goddess
Since you and I both are looking into
The same lucent iris, I leave it to her hands
To deliver this, my nocturnal message
My quill screeches in tune with my breathing
Transforming my thoughts into inked consequences
With informal beginning and clumsy first paragraph
But with dictionaries and poetry nearby
I still can't find the words to properly say "hi"
So between the H and the I the moon somewhen went away
Leaving room for the sun to shine unhindered
And probe over my shoulder, only to retreat scared
Of the frowning purple from under my eyes
Va plutot cracher tes tourments sur la blogosphereRongé par des idées suicidaires à cause d'une fille,Va plutot cracher tes tourments sur la blogosphere1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Mais arrête de me faire chier avec ta crise de lycéen.
Comme tous les autres c'est du réconfort que tu recherches,
Va le chercher ailleurs,
Je n'ai pas été enfanté pour réconforter le monde.
Je le sais que tu passes tes soirées en larmes
Dans tes draps à attendre que les secondes passent,
Je le sais que tu camoufles ton désespoir
Derrière des masques de "dark connerie"
Va plutôt cracher tes tourments sur la blogosphère
Et arrête de croire que ton entourage est plus heureux que toi !
J'attends que tu caresses ta peau à coups de cutter,
Et si tu ne veux pas le faire pour toi au moins fais-le pour moi.
C'est difficile de vivre lorsque plus rien ne te satisfait,
Ni la musique ni les jeux vidéos,
Tu n'arrives plus à étudier,
Tu foires tous tes partiels,
Va plutôt avaler cette plaquette de somnifères.
how do they even dareI can’t seehow do they even dare1 day ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Why they say
They are so goddamn scarred.
“I look like a model.
But nobody sees the duct tape heart behind my beauty”
What does your otherness have to do
With your defaults.
Oh, so you are slaves to your appearance?
Tell that someone who is too tall.
Too heavy. Too. Fucking. Small.
Or just born as plain and ugly.
Tell that someone who wasn’t accepted by
Our oh-so-social society because of his looks.
And then explain to me
That you didn’t feel stupid.
You’re not pretty.
You’re just ignorant.
FootstepsThis is how you know you've lost them.Footsteps2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
1. They used to look at you like you were a sunny day after a week of rain. Now, it feels like they’ve always been a rain person, because when you stand in front of them they act like it hurts to look at you. Their eyes used to remind you of everything beautiful but now they are clouded by storms and fog. They don’t light up anymore unless it’s through the flat reflection of artificial lighting. Does it count as blindness if it’s only you they can’t see anymore?
2. They used to touch you like you were the richest silk, the softest thing to ever grace their fingertips. Now, they don’t even touch you. They slide through your fingers like water and they don’t feel so warm anymore, not the way they used to be. You don’t feel like silk anymore. You feel like burlap. You almost wish you always had, just so you wouldn’t know what it was like to be any better than that.
3. They used to taste you like y
FootstepsWe are whispering to bedroom walls vampires of secrets that never cross the doorways. Why can’t we just talk the way we used to? Instead I find myself tiptoeing around hallways that echo far too loudly for me to hear myself, let alone reach out to you. For a house, this doesn’t feel like home. I know a blockade when I see one. You have built up your walls of silence and painted white wood. You are right there, tucked behind your barricade and I am out here, wondering if it takes a bloody sacrifice to lure you, the lion, out from the safety you built. For some reason it feels like there is a tangible chasm between us, like the floor is a gaping maw and your demons are waiting at the bottom to devour me if I dare try to cross over to you. But I have demons too, and I think that if mine met yours they’d tear us both apart.Footsteps2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I have already made bloody sacrifices, carved out lines in the name of peace and calm. You know that I have. You know that I will continue to. But you
Working, Not Working. Hardly Working, HardlyTwo eyes casted upward,Working, Not Working. Hardly Working, Hardly2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
an uneasy breath taken in.
The sky looks mighty fine tonight,
I wonder if you can see it.
Can you see the stars I see?
Can you taste the air
there a lot of things I need to do tonight.
Homework, Tumblr, homework, Netflix,
wasting my life away,
starting my life again,
and then maybe some more homework
with some chai tea on the side
to warm my old heart.
The air is mighty cold tonight,
I wonder if you can feel it.
Can you feel the breeze I feel?
Do you shiver
the way I do?
I have so many things on my plate tonight.
one final crack at Calculus,
and then maybe some more thinking
of my heart pounding next to yours
to stimulate my cold bones.
Ugh, I can't focus!
The moon looks so beautiful tonight.
I wonder if you're thinking about me too,
what would you say if you knew?
I have a lot of work to do.
V O I DEmptiness surrounds and consumes while voices whisper and scurry about,V O I D2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Shadows dance and bend into each other though this is no light to be found.
The air is still yet somehow it moves carrying sounds that can't seem to get out,
Floating or falling, flying or stationary the only truth is that there is no ground.
Crying out to what is above, yet is can very well be the space that lies below,
Eyes open yet it feels like they're shut feels blind either way in the surrounding world.
Is this my hell, or is it a dream? It felt like it began so very long ago,
Is this open or compact I can no longer tell, this world is beyond swirled.
I want to find the sun again and shun out the darkness soon,
This can't be such a horrid thing to ask for I so hope.
I would even embrace the frigged light of the winter moon,
Maybe with some light it will be easier to cope.
I hate it when I am stuck here, this never ending strife,
This empty, dark, hushed voice filled place is my mind.
And the void I find mysel
Dark MindAlways walking into the darkness of my mindDark Mind2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Never seeing the souls I try to find
For their fate is sadly sealed
With a deal that will never be appealed
It's always so hard trying to find
The maker of these applied designs
But never less they are always there
While the burning in my heart is still growing fair
And so I ask "Why do I care?"
Because these aren't my deals and it's not theirs
the transgression of my worshipi want to lift up certain words over my headthe transgression of my worship2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
and let them float to god
so that he can determine whether
"if you say so" is an acceptable response
to a lover's misunderstanding
i am too sinful to go to church and too innocent to sin
and my heart is not red it is
and my blood is not vibrant it is
clouded with dying cells
and the sickness you afflicted me with
and i am healing slowly but not fast enough
and i know god is watching and that he sees this
why are you letting me suffer?
i ask him so many things and get no response
why did you let my childhood friends move away?
why did you let certain people leave me life?
my words are incessant
and i'm sorry if they trouble you but
it's bothering me that i feel so mortal in
a world of immortal things
and so i ride my bike down fractured streets
and sing hymns i learned on sundays
to paint a picture of you so that i have something i can
truly see and feel
i almost get hit by a car on fallsgrove dr
because i am so in lost in these thou
BleedingIt's my faultBleeding2 days ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I fucked up again
I . . . . fuck!
Without a thought
I punch a wall
My knuckles call
I strike myself
The fine claret
Knife off the shelf
What did I drink?
What did I smoke?
I -I can't think
I start to choke
The blade is cold
Release some pressure
It's called bleeding
My arm goes numb
My fingers drip
Raise it to my mouth
I take a sip
That's how they find me
It's too late now
My last taste
The metal's sour
My girl's there
She pleads with me "what did I do?"
I-it's me I'm not good enough for you
Now i can't hurt her
Now she is free
I bet she's happy
To be rid of me
This makes me smile
I hate me too
All the while
She calls my name
It's all the same
Won't you sleep for me?
We'll sing in the surf
And drown in the sea
The world goes dark
No pain no more
I love her