PerplexedDid I find you when you found me...Perplexed8 minutes ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Or is this another fantasy?
Have I dreamed you up in my mind?
Has illusion made me blind?
Am I seeing the real you,
Or is my vision askew...
Causing a fascination,
Induced by imagination?
I must cautiously hesitate...
Since I can't differentiate,
Reality from fantasy...
And it's all confusing me.
© Mary Elizabeth Balderrama
SenselessThe star that shines so very brightSenseless40 minutes ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
It takes away the darkest night
And when I can look into the light
I will no longer need my sight
When on the gates of hell I pound
It was your words that I found
And when I hear the chasing hound
I do not need to hear the sound
When our hands touch the ceiling
I know our hearts will need no healing
And when the layers at last are peeling
I will know no other feeling
You are the only one that I need
In my heart I hold no greed
My heart would rather bleed
Than be the one to feed
As I leave the gates of hell
I know that I’m under you spell
I am no longer a lifeless shell
I no longer wish for any smell
My senses take flight
Blinded by light
I feel no fright
Gone is the night
Shards of GlassEverything was all just historyShards of Glass3 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Nothing but just another memory
Of us together that I could only reminisce
A lovely picturesque, now in thousand pieces
Visions turned into broken promises
My whole being turned into a complete mess
Yearning for the impossible to happen
Helplessly crying with a heart that’s broken
We were not part of a puzzle anymore
That would be complete once put together like before
We’re not like the perfect masterpiece we once were in the past
We’re reduced to nothing but shards of glass
Lonely HollidaysThe holidays are coming, they're nearly hereLonely Hollidays6 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
People are buzzing with holiday cheer
The shops overflow, a sea of joyous smiles
As holiday shoppers march through the aisles
Parent, sibling, colleague, friend
The list goes on, without end
So hurry along , you'd better be swift
As each needs a thought-out gift
Yet here I sit, my trials to bemoan
Cursing the fact that I'm all alone
They'd dished out their orders, I dared disobey
To be myself, this is the price I pay
I'd been truthful, and my just reward?
They'd left of their own accord
Go ahead and judge me, I know you will
As you eat and drink long past your fill
You'll look around you, and all you will see:
Familiar faces gorging on holiday glee.
Cruel To Be KindDon’t tease with soft kissesCruel To Be Kind6 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
And warm gentle sighs
Your caresses so warm –
Are they just a disguise?
Are you really in love
Or just a passing phase?
I see you looking at me,
The cold turn of your gaze
I’d rather have honesty –
Hear the truth of your mind
It may hurt for a time –
It’s often cruel to be kind
Seeking KindnessI seek kindnessSeeking Kindness7 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
In your soft brown eyes
So deep, so soulful -
But are they full of lies?
You say you care
But I’m not really sure
If I give you a chance -
Will it make my heart sore?
We have different tastes
And our lives are apart
You are shrouded in darkness -
But is it through to the heart?
So, can I redeem you –
To tell the past a goodbye
We’ll just never know, so -
Shall we give it a try?
lostBeneath the mask that others seelost7 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
i wear another, the mask of me
But ive worn it too long and when i take it off
Everything that was beneath is gone
i made so many masks to be
The one i wanted myself to see
But now to my horror, my utter disgrace
It appears that i have lost my face
So now i search through my stack
Of masks long passed, now old and cracked
But now its gone and im too late
i traded image for my fate
Someone save me
i think im drowning
Nocturnal PoetryNocturnal PoetryNocturnal Poetry7 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Nocturnal poetry, the sound of the life,
Flames in my heart, the words of love are rife.
Suffering from the bitter pain I was voicelessly screaming.
Caught up by my own demons, never even dreaming,
That one day, the darkness within me would be vanished,
By the eternal light of yours with love so deep replenished,
We would rise from the ashes, not in the distant future, but today,
Standing together inside flames…
We would forget about the pain of yesterday.
Those things never even dreamt are becoming true.
You’re the light in the dark night’s blue,
The life running through my veins,
Getting me rid of all chains.
The last thing I have in my mind at the evening,
Belongs to you…
So as the first thought at the morning.
Nocturnal poetry, the lines written by feelings,
Guided by the heart, staying day-dreaming.
I’ve never thought that I’d feel alive once again,
That one day it will be the end of the rain.
You’ve showed me the b
Of Old AgeYellow rays that stainedOf Old Age8 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Our young memories
Now float away
As tears dry empty
When red leaves fall
Will you still look at me?
As my body, now small
Becomes hollow and weak
Though regret clouds
The days we were fools
These eyes that cast down
Will still look at you
Breaking PointThere is a certain part of growing upBreaking Point9 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
That now burdens my heart greatly
With just a bite of the serpent's apple
I am drowned in sin innately
And in this sea of deceit, my once blind eye
Views the faults of my elders, ears
Previously deaf hear pain and sadness
As it has been all through the years
It came as a shock to witness my friends
Falling not as kids in good fun
But men and women, with us no longer
Will suffer the day never done
But worse off are those who still live, yet they
Envy the ones who are deceased
Lost in a deeper pain, they do not know
That gradual death; a disease
Future buried and memories rotting
My world is in a sickened state
Losing the will to continue fighting
Contributes to all the hate
No longer do I wish time to change me
Instead, lingering on lost youth
I have gone internal seeking refuge
In the chamber that knows no truth
There may very well be no asylum
And no comfort for those who need
A redo of childhood, remembering
In which no memory can feed
Slit my wrists and pour lemon in it.You continue to yell at me.Slit my wrists and pour lemon in it.9 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Harsh words and death threats.
Venom flying out from your mouth, staining my shirt, and burning holes in my pants.
Only damaging me from the outside in, hurting my trust, breaking my pride..
Day after day, your verbal assaults tear down my barriers.
Month after month, I let blue gems cover my pillow.
Year after year, I let someone go.
Second after second, I am falling apart..
Slit my wrists and pour lemons in it.
My antidepressants could only heal so much.
So hurry on, kill me.
Before I swallow my pills with bleach.
Before I fade away to nothing but a memory..
Angel of TruthYou love what you want to seeAngel of Truth10 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Not the woman Ive come to be
you protect my sanctity
but punish my bravery
Im but a pet to you
A tool to use
Worthless without obedience
Given the bare minimum tolerance
You put a collar around my neck
Breeding submission since we met
Promising safety beneath your wings
Showering me with material things
You suffocate who I wish to become
Just to keep me trapped beneath your thumb
Free will is a plague in your minds eye
But to be caged? Id rather die.
So you toss me away like trash
Because our visions of love clash
While i love your devotion and laughs
You only love it when i follow your path
You were mistaken my beloved
I wasn't your gift from above
I am an angel a powerful being
Meant to bring joy from sea to sea
I was not meant to suffer beneath your feat
I am not a dog you get to beat
I am the angel i was meant to be
You were just the obstacle that strengthened me.
StrengthIt breaks my heart to see you cryStrength13 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
To see you broken and feeling blind
It hurts my heart to see your pain
To see you suffer, to go insane
It makes me struggle it makes me prey
To beg my God for what to say
I want to fix it, to heal your heart
To pull you together not tear you apart
I must not to trample or be too rough
I must hold my ground cause love is tough
I must learn to whisper, when i want to yell
To show you heaven when you feel like hell
How do I do this and what to say?
How do i show you the proper way?
I see what you have, your joy and light
And i know it's worth every second you fight
Don't give up, don't turn or fade
Don't fear doubt or the things that change
Don't be robbed of joy by pain
Don't lash out and point the blame
Just hold on tighter, the storm will pass
Just keep moving through the lovers dance
From dawn till dusk you know it's true
You are bound to her and she to you.
And if the day should come when you solo once more
Don't let it be something youll regret or m
You Really Don'tYou come inYou Really Don't13 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
And you ignore my existence
Feel our resistance
Wish you had hit me
Instead of saying what you said
Wish we fought it out
Wish I had actually bled
Cuz I am bleeding
But this blood is inside
Only came out
With those tears I had cried
This blood is yours
It's our DNA
Like it or not
That aint goin away
As for the shit people are sayin
Man I don't know what to do
Don't tell me what they said
Tell me why they said it to you
Cuz there's just no reason
For you not to be on my side
We've been through too much
Don't tell me that it died
So I guess I'll just wait
Guess I'll wait for you to see
Open those eyes
You really don't wanna lose me
Never Again.No matter how many breaths I take I just can’t breatheNever Again.14 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Even though I’m missing you, you’re not missing me
Vainly cry a thousand tears; they won’t change a thing
Either pull myself together or just pull up my sleeves
Reach for the only friend I have who will never leave
Arguing with emotions I keep locked away within
Giving in as they surge against my fraying nerve
Against my will, against my mind, against my separated skin
I only cut deep enough to feel the scream inside
Never deep enough to bleed, never deep enough to die
CleanseCleanseCleanse16 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Humanity, a cheap wasted hustle.
Our world but filled by filth and lies and hate.
It’s clearest fix to rend bone and muscle.
All should cower, lost in fear of the date.
Is damnation our truest saving grace?
The fires of judgment our salvation?
As flames devour the full of our race,
Will our lives revert beyond creation?
The flames shall lick the frames of the listless,
As we all burn for our justest of ends.
Their screams come as music ever timeless,
All for the pain that it carries and lends.
The match I lit returned them to the earth,
My deed to bring but eternal rebirth.
Sunset DreamerAmongst the canopy where Emily playedSunset Dreamer16 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
The sunset smeared such lovely shades
Yet the color that seemed to catch her breath
Was the crimson streak of cosmic death
Her eyes reflected her soul's appearance
Obsidian heaven with no interference
The clouds thinned as starry indigo casts
Outer space viewed through onyx glass
She knew the sky would crash and shatter
Giving way to heat and heavenly matter
The scorching light would blister her skin
Yet her love for the night was her infamous sin
If she died, would she see the sky again?
The way the stars stagger as the colors blend
It was hard to imagine because she couldn't tell
If she would go to Heaven or a flaming jail
Emily sat watching falling stars stream
Craving the touch of lunar dust and Milky Way dreams
She shut her eyes and wandered through galactic seas
But when she awoke she was still in the trees
The death of EponineHe stands,The death of Eponine17 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Old poemI can't feel my hands anymore.Old poem18 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I hope you die knowing I think I'm a whore.
I don't understand
What I did to earn your backhand.
Tell me what I did wrong
Why I will never belong.
I am a coward.
I know it.
I am in pain
I show it.
Is this your idea of family?
So many years of pain
Never living happily
Is this a family?
What did I do?
What have I done to you?
It's not my fault you broke the condom
Now you want me to die.
I can't take it anymore.
I'm tired of wanting to cry.
I NEVER WANTED TO EXIST!
I KNOW I WON'T BE MISSED!
Since I'm such a mistake,
Let me just correct myself
This must be fate.
I see a knife on the shelf.
I can't deal with this pain
Love to put a bullet through my brain
But that would be wasting a bullet.
But I can't take this shit.
I'm gonna die.
Stick a needle in my eye.
Now I'm dead.
All you will ever see is red.
Who am I?Hiding behind a computer screen,Who am I?19 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Watching as the mice go and play,
Not including me.
No matter how hard I try,
None of the mice pay attention,
From their game of life.
Oh how I wish the mice would look,
Lonely old me in the corner crying,
Can't you see me dear mice?
Some days I just give up and watch the mice,
Maybe I'll go and play,
Or maybe I won't try.
These creatures crawling through the surface,
Rejoicing over found fun,
Leaving me out of the picture.
Sometimes I wonder and ponder,
"Could they just be ignoring me?"
"Or am I the mouse and they are the people?"
In this huge world no one knows about,
These mice play all day,
But not the ones far away.
Could it be I'm the only one,
If so who am I then?
Am I a mouse? Or a human?
Who could I be?
Surrounded by blind creatures,
Playing around in an empty maze.
Who will I be?
The one begging for attention,
Or the one giving attention.
What can I be?
Certainly not a mouse,
But maybe not a human.
Who am I?
Buried AliveI'm buried,Buried Alive19 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
By the weight in which I've carried,
So I'm being crushed,
Like being brushed,
Off by those whom I cherish,
So here I'll perish,
As a way of seeking a way,
To truly say,
I'm in need of a friend,
A true blend,
To the ideas that I hold close,
So I suppose,
You'll just leave,
The webs you weave,
Make me so unsure,
And makes my head stir,
But I'll just swallow my hopes,
And hang myself from these ropes,
Cause I can't get out from underneath,
This oppressive beast,
That is depression,
It's like an unwanted obsession,
But I'll still smile and wave,
Cause I am a slave,
To this life of tears,
As I'm putting up mirrors,
With a gun to my head,
Inside I'm dead.
Inside is Where I HidePeel back the layers I hide,Inside is Where I Hide20 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
And you can decide,
What it is that makes me tick,
But make it quick,
Cause I might fall for you,
Isn't that the truth,
Cause I care too much,
But I'm out of touch,
With what society wants,
So I just deal with the stunts,
I'm sick of lying,
Cause I'm slowly dying,
From everything I hold within,
Deep beneath my skin,
I hate myself for it,
Just a bottomless pit,
Of emotions and problematic thoughts,
As my muscles are filled with knots,
From working too hard,
I've been dealt another bad card,
But I just stay withdrawn,
Far from any happy things,
Cause I've become used to pain,
Used to the rain,
That falls constantly into my hands,
Ruining all my plans,
But the only one I've yet to fulfill,
Is climbing this hill,
And overcoming this sorrow,
So here comes tomorrow,
But it's all the same,
Spilling another name,
Into my head,
Cause it's someone I want in my bed,
But they don't want me,
Cause they can't see,
Anything but my misery,
Mother, I don't want to go to school anymore . . .Qalam pa zay paki topak winamaMother, I don't want to go to school anymore . . .20 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
(I see a gun instead of a pen)
Siyahi dawaat da weeno dak winama
(I see the inkpot full of blood)
Agha maidan chi zama lobo zay wo
(The ground where I used to play)
Agha maidan ki os khandaq winama
(I see holes in that ground)
Na moori bas day nur za school ta na zam
(Mother, I don’t want to go to school anymore)
Os rata board bandi dostaan khkari
(Now I see my friend’s faces on the board)
Chi sho shaar agha gulistan khkari
(I see the garden that is deserted now)
Kitab kolao kam nu har taki pa zay
(In books instead of each word)
Pa weeno lat pat mashooman khkari
(I see kids stained in blood)
Na moori bas day nur za school ta na zam
(Mother, I don’t want to go to school anymore)
Os mi ghwagonu ki da dazo shor wi
(Now there is a noise of gunfire in my ears)
Chi kam khwa guram alta bal oor wi
(Wherever look I see fire)
Pa soch ki lar sham ao da fikar kawom
(I feel lost and I think)
Da DWI kho bam akhpal bachi kor wi?
(Don’t they have
I Lay in GrayThe past no longer hauntsI Lay in Gray22 hours ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
And the troubles have subsided
I sill posses these contradicting thoughts
That equate with my thoughts divided
The track is stuck on play
Mediocrity pulls me day to day
With such neutrality, my only words can be:
Alas, I lay in gray
From what we can see ahead
We have beat our emotions till dead
The fatality of our souls has pondered
Those same beings still wander
The shadow over my day
Becomes a friend to outweigh
The star of this show:
Alas, I lay in gray