115 Things That I, Richtofen, Can't Do1. I can't attempt to experiment on my "Allies"... Again...115 Things That I, Richtofen, Can't Do3 years ago in Humor More Like This
2. It was a pain in the ass last time
3. And they may turn into zombies
4. I can't say certain things to Nikolai
5. Despite the fact that everything I say is true
6. He is really Slippery, wet and fun
7. ...And soft and fuzzy...
8. And no, I am not gay for the Russian!
9. I Just have a 100% heterosexual liking to him!
10. That's all. Nothing more, nothing less.
11. It's forbidden for me to try and lure my fans toward me
12. And remove all of their vital organs
13. ...And place them all in nice, little decorative jars
14. German Sparkle Parties are also forbidden
15. The take me back to my 935 days... When we'd all get drunk
16. Really drunk
17. I can't have fun with my minions
18. Even though I'm only going to remove their spleens
19. ...And possibly other things...
20. I can't attempt to kill the stupid American
21. Because I need him for my plans to-
22. I mean, we still need him as a team!
23. I can't comment on how much Ta
Richtofen - Zombies OneshotI frowned, the blood dripping down the wall. The shotgun was hanging loosely in my grip. The body had plenty of holes in it, bleeding from every pore the red substance could fit out of.Richtofen - Zombies Oneshot4 years ago in Fan Fiction More Like This
"Vell zhat isn't shupposed to happen Ah vell." I shrugged, unchained the body you couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl and dragged it out of the office.
"Emily!" I called with a smile on my face. She poked her head out of the cubed area, frowning when she saw my smile and the body.
"Can you dishpose of zhe body and get me anozher? I zhink I have it zhis time!" She sighed, got up, took the body from me and dragged it outside. About ten minutes later she came in with a writhing child.
"Put me down!" She demanded, squirming and hitting. I took the child into the room I just came out of and set her down. Her eyes widened in fear as she saw the blood against the wall.
"Don't vorry," I comforted, "You are only an exshperament. Be grateful." She wasn't comforted, and I